I'm a little cynical, she's a little rockundroll

First of Many 3/3

Thu, 22 May 2008 19:40:58 GMT

Title: First of Many 3/3 COMPLETE
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: bill/andreas, bill/OMCs, tomxbill
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: In bed he tells everyone that they're his first, but what happens when Bill falls in love for the first time?

Tom slides his key through the door with a tired sigh, and pushes into the room. It’s a nice room, but for the first time in a long time, he’s sharing with Bill. It’s not a problem, they just haven’t shared in months, not since the first time they came to America.

And now they’re back to do another small tour after Bill’s vocal chord surgery.

Tom slumps down on his bed, the jet lag is killing him. He can hear the water running in the bathroom. Bill must be taking one of his long baths.

Across from his bed is Bill’s, his laptop is open on the mattress, an instant messenger program blinking on the screen. Tom sits up, squinting his eyes. He wonders…

He moves over to the other bed and grabs the laptop, listening to make sure the water is still running in the bathroom. Staring down at the screen, he frowns. Bill’s been talking to Mark again.

Bill met Mark in Toronto and they’ve been chatting on and off for months, and the best thing is, in Bill’s mind, is that he’s fluent in German. Tom knows that had sealed the deal.

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m_stryker:

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m_stryker:

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m_stryker:

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m_stryker:

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Tom groans loudly. He knew Bill chatted with people online but he’d never known it was like this. He lets out a growl, feeling protective of his little brother. This filthy pervert online, this “m_stryker”, couldn’t, and wouldn’t touch Bill. Tom would make sure of that.

**

Bill sinks down deeper into the tub, the water splashing up against his chin and cheeks. He’s got the temperature at scalding, just the way he likes it, and the water is easing all of the aches out of his body.

His hands are sliding down his belly, ready to ease out another ache. The ache in his groin.

Chatting with Mark had made him hot, but that isn’t the only reason he’s sporting a seriously angry erection. He has Tom on his mind, which is becoming a disturbing, but arousing hobby of his lately.

He wraps his hand around his dick and strokes just right up the shaft, teasing the head. He thinks of Mark, gorgeous, Canadian Mark, thrusting into him, holding him down, pushing him around. He groans, his hips arching up.

In his mind, they’re in this same hotel room, and it’s just after the big show in Toronto. Bill’s high on adrenaline and Mark’s high on Bill. “I’ve wanted you to be my first for so long,” Bill would whisper in Mark’s ear as they tumble onto the mattress.

Mark would just grin, flip Bill over, expose his ass and pound into him recklessly. Just as Bill’s about to come, Tom would walk in, looking bashful, scandalized, shocked. But he wouldn’t leave; he’d stand there and watch.

“Bill, fucking Bill, I can’t believe you-”

Bill snaps out of his fantasy and looks up. Tom has just barged into the bathroom and when he sees Bill, he groans, looking away. Bill has his hand on his dick and he’s stroking it with hard, desperate movements.

“Oh, god,” Tom says, putting his head in his hands. “Fuck, I’m sorry, ugh.”

“No, don’t go,” Bill says breathlessly, slowing his strokes, but not stopping.

“Bill… I can’t talk to you when you’re doing that,” Tom says. He takes a couple of steps back, wincing.

“Okay, I’ll stop,” Bill says, somewhat calmly. With much effort he lets go of his cock and leans back. He’s very hard, very erect, and his cock is rising out of the water.

“Bill, fuck,” Tom curses. “I can’t – I can’t just… talk to you while your boner is— Ugh! It’s staring me right in the face!” he yells, gesturing to Bill’s erection.

Bill sighs and slides down, plunging himself into the water, pulling his knees together. “Jesus, Tom, you’re such a child. What’s the matter?”

Tom seems to remember why he came into the bathroom in the first place and crosses his arms, his expression hardening. “You are not hooking up with some random guy you met online!”

Bill sits up quickly, splashing water onto Tom’s shoes. “I didn’t meet him online, Tom. I met him a couple of months at the Mod Club in Toronto and we’ve just been chatting!”

“I know what you’re going to do, Bill. You’re going to fuck him over, like you do everyone else, and this guy has a family!”

Bill rolls his eyes, leaning back, uncaring now if Tom sees him naked. "Oh yeah, Tom, high moral grounds. You let me jerk you off before.” Tom goes red. “Besides, the family never matters. He's straight, it's fine."

Tom is obviously flustered. He stutters, stepping forward and pointing his finger at Bill. “You know no one can resist you, straight or not. I’m a testament to that. You don’t have to be such a bitch about it!”

“I am not a bitch!” Bill cries out.

“Yeah, you are,” Tom says sourly. “You jerked me off, for fuck’s sake.”

“You liked it,” Bill says. He slumps back more, remembering the feel of Tom’s dick in his hand. “I… liked it,” he adds. “Fuck, I did.”

He lets out a low moan and grabs at his cock again, he’s ready to come.

“Oh god!” Tom yells, throwing his arms up. “That is it, Bill.”

He turns to leave and Bill whines. “Tomi, noooo…” He’s still stroking himself, his toes curling against the porcelain.

Tom doesn’t turn back around. “Are you still doing it?”

“Tomi,” Bill says, swirling his finger around the head of his dick. “Tomi, if you stay, I won’t let that guy fuck me.”

“Are you kidding me?” Tom looks over his shoulder, flushed to his ears. “No way, Bill.”

“Tooooooooomi.” Bill’s hips jerk up and Tom turns, shaking his head.

“How about… You don’t screw any guys while we’re here, and I stay. Eh?”

Bill shakes his head. “No deal, we’re here for a whole week. That’s a really long time.”

“Not that long, Bill.”

Bill makes a face and sinks lower. He’s staring at Tom, feeling hotter by the minute, and then, he gets an idea. “Touch me a little and I won’t fuck any guys.”

“Fuck no.”

“Come on, I touched yours, and you said you couldn’t resist me,” Bill says softly.

“This isn’t fair, you know I can’t,” Tom replies, frowning. He’s blushing, beet red. He looks adorable and it’s riling Bill up. “All I have to do is touch it and you won’t fuck any guys? While we’re here?”

Bill nods slowly, feeling rattled. “Yeah…”

Keeping his eyes on Bill, Tom gets to his knees and moves closer to the tub. Bill’s belly is flipping with arousal, excitement, nerves. He’s hardly ever been nervous before with another guy. He’s always felt confident, in control. But now, anticipating Tom’s touch, he’s feeling shy.

“Okay, I’m… going to…”

Tom reaches into the tub and Bill arches his back, lifting his hips out of the water. As soon as Tom’s fingers touch his dick, Bill lets out a contented sigh, sinking back down in the water. Their eyes are connected, Tom’s expression is intense. His hand wraps around Bill’s cock and strokes gently.

His hands are big and strong and Bill can’t help but moan. He moans so loudly that he thinks he’s startled Tom away, but Tom just grips him tighter, pulling his hand up and twisting.

It’s the best thing Bill’s ever felt and he starts thrusting into the touch. Tom gasps, but doesn’t let go as Bill moans louder.

“Tomi, Tomi,” Bill sighs, closing his eyes. “Tomi, oh, I have to wonder why you don’t… mmm… why you don’t want any guys to fuck me while we’re here.”

Tom’s grip tenses. “It’s dangerous, you could get hurt—”

“I don’t think that’s why,” Bill breathes, grinding into Tom’s palm. “I don’t think, mmm, Tom, so good…”

“It is,” Tom insists, squeezing Bill and fingering his balls. “You’re my baby brother, Bill, I don’t want anyone touching you.”

That does it. Bill draws in a sharp breath and comes hard, arching up and thrusting his hips. He clenches his eyes shut and feels his release, relief flowing all through his limbs.

When he opens his eyes, Tom looks horrified and he’s got some of Bill’s come on his cheek. The expression on his face is fucking priceless and Bill can’t help but giggle just a little.

“Oh my god,” Tom says, wiping at his cheek frantically. “Oh my god.” He stands, nearly tripping over his feet, and just gapes at Bill.

Bill lets out a loud chuckle, sitting up and grabbing Tom’s wrist. “Tomi, oh my god, that was…”

Tom tugs his hand away, grimacing. “Bill, I just…!” He flails a bit and Bill wants to laugh again, but then Tom is gone and the door slams shut with a loud bang. “Jesus!” Tom yells from the other room and Bill giggles, slipping completely under the water.

**

Bill crawls over to Tom on the bed, tickling up his neck with perfectly manicured fingers.

“Bill,” Tom groans, rolling away. It’s bedtime and Bill doesn’t want to sleep alone. “Don’t.”

“You don’t,” Bill says, leaning down and snuggling in. “Yoooou.”

“Bill, knock it off, I feel weird about—”

“Tom, fine,” Bill snaps. “I got some on your face, so what?”

“Bill!”

“Relax.” Bill touches Tom’s cheek, smiling. “I got some on yours, want some of yours on mine? I’ll return the favor.”

Tom’s eyes go wide and he scrambles away from Bill, knocking his pillows onto the floor. “Why would I want that?”

Bill scoots over, clambering onto Tom and shoving him onto his back. “Everyone wants that,” Bill says.

“No, I don’t—”

Bill tugs Tom’s pajama pants down and sticks out his tongue. Tom is hard and beautiful, just like Bill remembers. He ducks his head down and sucks the tip into his mouth before Tom can say another word.

“Bill, you fucking – Shit!! Stop!” Tom cries out, putting a hand on Bill’s forehead, weakly pushing him away. But Bill’s got his mouth firmly on Tom’s dick and he’s going on pure instinct. He’s never sucked anyone’s cock before, he’s never really wanted to, but something about Tom’s cock just has his mouth watering.

Bill looks up. Tom’s face is screwed up, somewhere between confusion and pleasure. Bill knows that look. He bats Tom’s hands away and grips his brother’s hips, swirling his tongue around Tom’s cock.

It tastes delicious and fresh, and the power Bill feels is unbelievable. He’s rendering Tom useless. Tom’s hesitation is almost nonexistent now. He’s only sort of pushing Bill’s head away. Actually, Bill thinks he’s pushing him down further, directing him so that it feels better.

It’s hot, the hottest moment of Bill’s life. Tom’s gaze meets Bill’s and they stare at each other as Bill’s jaw works hard around Tom’s dick.

“Bill, oh god,” Tom mumbles, his fingers tensing in Bill’s locks. “Fuck, your mouth… Your… Oh, shit, lower!”

“Mmm,” Bill hums, smiling, his lips slurping Tom further down. His own cock is so hard it hurts and he pushes it against Tom’s leg, moaning as he sucks Tom harder.

“No, no, that’s so good,” Tom groans. “Why is that so… ah!”

Bill knows Tom hasn’t gotten any in ages, so maybe he’s reacting more to the stimulation in general and not Bill’s skill, but it doesn’t matter. Tom is shaking and clutching at Bill and the sheets. Shaking and humping his hips up, holding on and cursing.

Bill rubs against Tom and takes him deeper. He almost gags and eases up, licking at the head. Tom is so wet there and soft, Bill flicks his tongue out hard and fast.

“Bill, Bill, Bill, nooooooooooo.”

Bill sucks the tip hard and this time Tom isn’t saying no. He’s chanting yes and throwing his head back. He’s stroking Bill’s face tenderly, his legs falling open. Bill’s heart aches more than his groin now, and he cups Tom’s balls, sighing deeply as Tom shudders, coming with a sweet cry.

Bill swallows his come because he loves Tom, because Tom’s being gentle and sweet in the blankets. His bare chest is gleaming with sweat, his face flushed, his eyes shut, mouth slightly open on panting breaths.

“That was my first,” Bill murmurs. “It wasn’t too bad, though. I even got it in my mouth. My mouth, and it was fine.” He strokes Tom’s throat.

“Bill,” Tom says with a groan, his eyes opening to catch Bill’s gaze. “That wasn’t your first, don’t give me that shit.”

“Yes it was! I’ve never blown a guy before,” Bill snaps back. “Jesus!”

Tom’s face softens again and Bill smiles. “Really? Your first?”

“Yeah.” Bill nips at Tom’s shoulder, pulling the blankets up to cover them in the dim room. “Aren’t you special?”

“Oh, shut up,” Tom says, voice content.

“Yeah, yeah. Let’s go to bed.”

**

Bill and Tom share a secret, warm look as they’re sitting in a booth with Gustav and Georg after their show in Toronto. Tom’s across from Bill and Bill kicks his feet out a little, trapping Tom’s leg between his ankles. He sees Tom’s face flush a little and Bill delights in this.

There’s only one straight guy on Bill’s mind at the moment, and it’s his own brother.

Bill sips the last of his drink and grabs at Tom’s. “Let me have it.”

“No way,” Tom replies, grinning. “Get another.”

“Georg will have to get it,” Bill whines, nudging the bassist.

“Oh, sure,” Georg says, his speech slurred. He’s good and drunk, not in any shape to go anywhere, not even in this tiny pub. “Get your own. Work your magic, Bill. I bet the bartender is straight.”

Bill laughs at this but Tom frowns a little. Bill just squeezes Tom’s leg a little harder and then scoots back to get out of the booth.

“Wish me luck,” Bill says, winking at his band mates. “With any luck I’ll have a Screwdriver when I get back.”

“And a number,” Gustav adds, snickering.

Bill rolls his eyes, giving Tom another sweet look. His brother perks up at this, covering his face with his beer.

Bill’s in excellent spirits as he leans on the bar, waiting for the bartender to give him some attention. The bartender is attractive, someone Bill might be interested in, but Bill has absolutely no intention of seducing him.

“Can I buy you a drink?”

Bill spins around when he hears the German in an unfamiliar voice. Standing behind him is Canadian Mark.

“Oh,” Bill murmurs, blinking. “It’s you.”

“Holy shit,” Mark says, staring Bill up and down lecherously. “You are… You look great. This was worth it, just to see you.”

“Um,” Bill says, glancing back over at the booth. “Thanks.”

“Thought we were going to meet up, but I never heard from you,” Mark goes on. “So I just stuck to the plan. I know you like playing hard to get.”

Bill laughs, leans in toward Mark. “I am hard to get.”

“I’m just hard,” Mark says lowly, eyes flashing. “Listen, I’ve got a suite, just down the street. The most expensive I could find. You want to get out of here?”

“Maybe,” Bill replies, smiling. It’s his first instinct, and Mark is very handsome, even more than he remembers. And he has the most adorable little Canadian accent.

“I’m gonna take your virginity,” Mark says. “I hope you’re ready.”

Bill lets out a breathy laugh and leans against Mark. “I’ve only been waiting for this for months.”

Mark slips an arm around Bill’s shoulders and Bill sighs, glancing back over at his band mates again. His eyes connect with Tom’s. His brother is frowning, looking confused. Disappointed.

“Oh, shit,” Bill mumbles, ducking out of Mark’s hold. “Actually, I don’t know if this is going to work out.”

Mark tries to grab a hold of him again. “Listen,” Mark says, smiling. “I didn’t come all the way for you to be a cock tease. I know it's your first time but…”

“I… I can’t,” Bill says. “There’s… I can’t believe I’m saying this, but there’s someone else.” Something clicks inside Bill and he smiles again. “Someone serious.”

Mark smiles for a moment, too, but then he’s shoving at Bill, pushing him toward the door. “Good one. Fuck that,” Mark grits out. Bill’s eyes snap open wide but before he can even think, Mark’s got him out the door and onto the street.

It’s evening and Bill doesn’t recognize anyone, not in a city that doesn’t even speak his language.

“What are you doing?” Bill bellows, smacking Mark hard in the shoulder.

“We’re going back to my hotel.”

“Oh, like hell we are!” Bill says. “I told you, there’s someone—”

“I know your game,” Mark says easily, guiding Bill down the street. “I know your tricks. I’m supposed to play along.”

“No, you’re supposed to get your fucking hands off me,” Bill spits out, spinning away from Mark. “I told you I’m not interested.”

“You’re interested,” Mark growls out, taking Bill by the shoulders and gripping them a little too hard. Bill cries out; it hurts, Mark is very strong.

“Bill?” Tom steps out of the pub and his face clouds over when he sees Mark roughing Bill up. “What the fuck is going on?”

Mark rolls his eyes. “He’s fine, we’re just going somewhere,” he says, staring at Bill. Bill shakes his head angrily.

Tom walks over to them and takes Bill’s arm, tugging it gently. “Come on, Bill.”

“Let me go,” Bill says weakly to Mark.

Mark glares at Tom. “Leave us the fuck alone. Bill was practically begging me for it like a whore.”

Tom just lets out a growl and tries to punch Mark in the jaw. He misses and stumbles back a bit, putting his fist up for more. Mark lets out a laugh and shoves Tom away. His elbow hits Tom’s jaw and Tom cries in pain, nearly falling backwards.

Bill sees all this and feels something stir inside him. He forces himself out of Mark’s hold and stands up tall, glaring at the older man.

“Don’t touch my brother,” he says before punching Mark, hard in the face.

Mark growls out a curse and turns around, holding his face. “Fuck you,” he says darkly, glancing over his shoulder. Bill can see that he did some damage, and he’s glad. “Fuck you, you little slut,” he says in English.

Bill folds his arms and nods. “Go away.”

“Whatever,” Mark mumbles, glaring at the twins one last time before walking away.

Bill immediately turns to Tom, puts a hand on his face, frowns. “Tomi, are you okay? I’m so sorry he came, I’m sorry, I could’ve handled him.”

“You did,” Tom says, laughing a little as he holds his face. “Fuckin’ sweet right hook, Bill.”

Bill blushes softly. “Well, he touched you.”

“He was going to touch you.”

“Yeah,” Bill murmurs, looking down. “Well, he’s not going to now.”

Tom looks around. “Let’s go back?”

Bill nods. “Okay.”

He lets go of Tom and watches his brother walk away, feeling something tug deep inside him.

**

Bill bites his lip as he holds some ice up to Tom’s face. They’re sitting on Tom’s bed in their hotel room and Bill is giving Tom extra attention, he’s being extra sweet because he’s feeling extra warm towards Tom right now.

“I can’t believe you did that, Tomi,” Bill whispers, touching the swollen part of Tom’s face.

“I can’t believe you did that,” Tom says. “You saved my ass.”

“Well,” Bill says, ducking his head down, feeling himself blush. “I just got lucky, he didn’t want to hit me because I’m so pretty.”

Tom laughs and pulls the ice out of Bill’s hands, lifting his head so their eyes meet. “You are.”

“Tomi,” Bill breathes and then he’s breathing into Tom. They kiss for the first time, a little sloppily, but Bill’s leaning into it, wanting more. He pulls out of the kiss before it gets too serious. “Tom.”

Tom’s hands cup Bill’s face. “Bill.” He leans in but Bill won’t let their lips join.

“Tomi, I wanted him to fuck me,” Bill admits. “I wanted it, I’m so sorry. I wanted it and then I saw you and then I wanted…”

“What?” Tom asks.

“I wanted you,” Bill says. “I want you.”

“How?”

“I want you to…” Bill can’t say it, for all his crassness in the past, he can’t tell his brother he wants to be fucked.

Tom’s face turns red, and Bill smiles.

“I guess I want you to… fuck me,” he says very softly, almost inaudibly.

“Oh,” Tom says, looking down and squirming a bit. “Fuck, that’s…”

Bill watches Tom carefully.

“Yeah,” Tom finally says. “Yeah, I want that, too.”

“But you’re straight…”

“Bill, you should know by now that you’re the exception every rule,” is all Tom says as he kisses Bill’s neck, gently pushing him down to his back. Bill feels his insides flutter and he feels very shy, very nervous.

He cares this time. He cares about how this is going to feel for both of them and he wants Tom to think he’s good.

They kiss slowly, and Tom feels down Bill’s slender body, cupping his ass. Bill lets out a low laugh, jerking slightly. He brushes his hand over Tom’s bruised face and kisses it, letting his tongue flicker out to wet the hot skin. Tom gasps, pulling back.

“Condom,” Tom murmurs.

Bill frowns. “I… want to feel you. And I want, when you come… I want it to be in me.”

“Are you sure?” Tom whispers. “Because I don’t care, but I thought you cared.”

Bill shakes his head. “Just you, Tomi.”

“Just me?” Tom asks.

Bill nods. “Yes, please. Just you.”

Tom makes a low, growly noise in his throat and squeezes Bill’s ass from underneath. His fingers brush down the clothed crease of Bill’s ass, grabbing and stroking, spreading Bill.

“God, you feel so good,” Tom says. “You’re body is so little, Bill. How am I gonna fit in there?”

Bill is liquid on the bed, lying back against the mattress with his hands tangled in the sheets. “You can get in there,” he says, opening his eyes and smiling at his brother. “Don’t worry.”

“But what if…” Tom squeezes again, lifting Bill’s lithe body up, gaping at it with hunger in his eyes. “Maybe I’m not so good at this, what if I’m no good?”

“Not even possible,” Bill sighs out. “Just this is so good. Take off my clothes and let’s make each other feel good.”

Tom nods and drags his hands down Bill’s chest, stopping to hook his fingers under Bill’s shirt hem and pulling it up and over his brother’s head. Bill shivers a little, smiling shyly at Tom. “Now you,” he says softly.

Tom gives one of his trademark lopsided smiles and tugs his own shirt off. “Just pants, now…”

“We’ve seen each other before.”

“This is different.”

“Don’t be a girl, Tomi,” Bill says, poking Tom’s belly. “Just do it.”

Tom rolls his eyes and fumbles with his belt buckle. He fails and just pushes his jeans and boxers down his hips, and pulls them off completely.

Bill gapes at Tom’s perfect, naked body. It’s so slender, smooth, just muscular enough. He reaches up to touch Tom’s hipbone and Tom draws back, wrinkling his nose.

“I gotta get you naked, now,” Tom murmurs. He awkwardly pulls at the waist of Bill’s jeans and Bill groans, his cock so hard and trapped in his pants.

“Hurry,” Bill manages. He helps Tom ease his jeans down his body and then they’re both naked, staring.

“Bill,” Tom says, smoothing his hand down Bill’s naked chest and belly. “You look…” He kisses Bill’s throat softly, just barely a touch of lips. “Good, you look so good.”

“So do you.” Bill crawls closer, kneeling in front of Tom. He cocks his head to the side, a small smile on his face, and wraps his arms around Tom’s waist. “Smell good, too,” he murmurs, and kisses Tom’s cheek.

Tom is actually trembling as their naked bodies brush together and Bill connects their lips. They share a few soft kisses, nuzzling their faces together, their hips, bellies, and groins bumping.

When their cocks collide they both gasp and look down. Their cocks are identical, hard, and smooth.

“Oh, that’s…” Tom flexes his hips and their cocks rub. “Look at that.”

“Oh, oh,” Bill whispers. “You’re wet.” He brushes his thumb against the exposed head of Tom’s dick.

“You, too,” Tom says, and does the same motion. They both smooth their thumbs in slow circles at the tips of their cocks, gasping and moaning. “Oh, not so hard, I’ll come,” Tom warns.

“Can’t do that,” Bill says, eyes still focused down at their cocks. They press together, rubbing harder and Tom finally has to pull back.

He’s sweating, grabbing at Bill’s shoulders and pushing him back against the mattress. Bill likes this, likes how Tom’s losing control and running on feeling now. Tom’s eyes aren’t their usual warm, light brown. Now they’re dark, shining, searching.

Bill relaxes his limbs and lets Tom explore his body. Tom is dragging his fingertips all over Bill, paying attention to every inch of skin. Bill’s never known this kind of intimacy. He’s never known that sex is so much more than a few jagged thrusts and then a sloppy release.

He wonders if this is how Tom had sex with the few girls he’d been with. The thought makes Bill half excited, and half jealous. He’s possessive of his brother, he doesn’t want him to touch anyone else like he’s touching Bill right now. It’s too good, it’s too sweet.

Tom pauses, resting his fingers on Bill’s hip, stroking his cock slowly. “What now?” he asks quietly.

Bill sits up a little, blinking. “Now you just… It’s time for, you know.”

Tom bites at his lip. “I usually, um… I usually go down on a girl before I get in her.”

“Oh, god,” Bill moans, shutting his eyes, because that’s hot. He regrets that he’s a boy for a second, he wants to feel Tom’s tongue inside him. “Fuck, Tom.”

Tom shrugs a little, looking lost. “I could… I could do that to you.”

“Really? How…” Bill trails off; he knows how. He stares at Tom, wide eyed. “You want to lick me there?”

“I want to lick you everywhere,” Tom says honestly, already spreading Bill’s legs. “God, it looks good. Are you sure I can?”

Bill shakes, nodding. “P-please, Tomi. I’ve never had that before…”

“I’m your first?” Tom smiles a little before leaning down and pressing a kiss to Bill’s hole.

“You could say that,” Bill says. Tom smiles against Bill’s ass and then flicks his tongue out, licking down the crease. “That’s… oh, Tomi.”

Tom licks again. “Yes, say my name,” he says, and then he’s licking Bill’s hole, twisting his tongue and getting inside.

“Tomi, Tomi, Tomi,” Bill gasps out. “More.”

Tom presses his tongue deeper, holding Bill’s ass and bringing Bill up to his mouth again and again. Bill’s hips are frantically working, shoving his ass against Tom’s mouth. It has to be making Tom’s job harder, but Bill can’t control it.

Tom releases Bill for a moment, staring up at him from between his long legs. “Say my name again.”

“Tom,” Bill says with a soft smile. Tom’s finger tickles Bill’s hole. “Tomi.” And then he ducks back down and sucks at Bill’s hole. “T-Tomi!”

“Mmm,” Tom hums out, his eyes staring at Bill as he goes down on him. Bill squirms, squeezing Tom with his thighs and clenching his muscles. His cock is so hard, twitching, and wet. Tom wraps a hand around it and squeezes as he sucks.

“Harder,” Bill breathes. “God, I could come like this…”

Tom growls into his hole and pulls back. “No, I want to make you come while I’m… in you.”

Bill nods, his whole body jittering. “Push your tongue in again – Mmm, god. Tomi. Tomi… You’re fucking amazing, god, the best…”

“The best?” Tom asks in a small voice.

Bill doesn’t know if Tom’s really the best, he hasn’t even fucked him yet. But of course Tom’s the best because Bill’s never felt this before. He’s never been emotionally invested in a fuck, and this is so much more than a fuck.

This is Tom, his big brother Tom, and he’s making Bill tremble all over.

Tom pulls away and strokes down Bill’s crease and just behind his balls. “Hot,” Tom murmurs, staring hard at Bill’s heated entrance. “Small,” he adds, in a worried tone.

“Don’t worry,” Bill says shakily. “It’ll… It’ll go in.”

Tom presses a kiss just behind Bill’s balls and sneaks a finger in his hole. Bill cries out, arching off the bed. Tom’s slender finger is working in there, curling unsurely, not meaning to drive Bill crazy, but it is. It’s riling Bill up and it’s barely breached his body.

“Fuck, Tomi, deeper, you’re teasing,” Bill gasps. Tom pushes his finger in more and Bill clenches his muscles, causing Tom to draw his hand back.

“Bill! You’re tight, shit,” Tom curses, looking mystified.

“Try it again, I’ll make it really good for you,” Bill whispers.

Tom nods and spreads Bill again, pressing his finger just inside. “Go easy on me,” Tom says quietly.

Bill smiles. “You’re doing so good, Tomi… Now press in deeper, go to the right a little… Oh,” he moans. “Oh, yeah, yeah. Fuck. Finger it, Tomi, make it a hurt a little.”

Tom raises his eyebrows.

“Just a little,” Bill says, blushing.

Tom presses harder and Bill moans louder than before. “Like that?”

Bill nods and gropes up around the pillow near the headboard. He’s digging under the pillow, cursing as Tom fingers him.

“What are you doing?” Tom asks, stilling his finger.

“Lube,” Bill says. He tugs his hand out, holding a small tube of it. “There.” He holds it out to Tom. “Put this on your fingers, okay? Put more in me and then… we can do it.”

“How many more?” Tom asks, taking the tube and twisting off the cap. He covers one finger with the slippery substance, looking down at Bill.

“Three, put three in me,” Bill says. “Okay? Is that okay?”

“Yes,” Tom says. He coats three fingers and takes a deep breath. His fingers are shaking as he drops the tube and touches Bill’s hole. Bill flinches; the lube is cold, and Tom’s fingers are hot beneath the gel. He’s never really stopped to realize just how lube feels against him.

Bill watches Tom, his eyes lowering down to his hard dick. His mouth waters; Tom is so attractive, his dick is exactly what Bill wants inside him. “Put some of it on you,” Bill says.

“On me?”

“On your… dick,” Bill says, flushing. “Then you’ll slide right in.”

Tom almost chokes but he rubs his fingers up and down his cock, slicking it liberally. His cock is shiny, hot, ready.

Their hands join and they kiss before Bill murmurs, “I’m ready.”

Tom squeezes Bill’s hands and lets go with one, bumping his cock against Bill’s hole. Bill gasps and his whole body tenses. Tom positions his dick right at Bill’s hole and gives him one last stare.

“Wish you were my first,” Bill mumbles.

Tom pushes in, not easily, but it slides inside Bill. Bill lets out a low moan. Tom’s cock feels so very different than all the men who’ve fucked him. Tom is smaller, smoother, more comfortable.

Bill just gazes up at Tom and lets his brother slide in and out of him a few times, until Bill puts a hand on Tom’s arm. “Do it harder, so much harder.”

Tom frowns. “I’ll hurt you…”

“Tom, no,” Bill says, letting out a long breath as Tom pushes inside him again. “Mm, god. That’s so good but it could be better. Harder, okay?”

“Okay,” Tom says, nodding. He holds Bill’s knees and drives forward again, holding himself deep inside.

“Ah! Yes!” Bill cries out. Tom doesn’t pull out but rotates his hips and Bill literally sees stars. He grabs at Tom’s shoulders and gasps into his neck.

Tom’s hips begin working harder, dragging his cock in and out of Bill’s body until the bed is squeaking and so is Bill.

“Is it good?” Tom asks, his face red, sweaty.

“So, so good,” Bill says. “You know just… just what to do, Tomi. Just like that, oh, just like that.”

“You’re squeezing me so hard,” Tom says, his hips still moving in devastating ways. Bill squeezes Tom even harder and it’s enough to have Tom doubling over and kissing Bill with a surprising passion.

It takes Bill’s breath away, and soon he’s shaking and moving his hips with Tom. This is the sort of fuck that’s making Bill’s head spin, making him hold on and whimper.

When Tom pulls away, Bill stutters out a sigh and clutches at Tom, afraid to let him go too far. “I’ve got an idea,” Bill whispers. “I’ve got an idea, Tomi.”

“What?” Tom seems to have the same fear as Bill; he’s holding tight, gripping Bill.

Bill wraps his arms around Tom and rolls them onto their sides. “Pull out,” Bill says. “Just for a second,” he adds, noting the panic on his twin’s face.

Tom slides out of Bill and they both groan. Bill turns around so that his back is to Tom, and he looks over his shoulder, kissing his brother’s face. They’re both on their sides and Bill’s grinding his ass against Tom’s cock.

“Put it in again,” Bill murmurs.

Tom wraps an arm around Bill’s waist and spreads his ass, pushing his cock back inside. Bill moans, shutting his eyes. He’s never felt this before, either.

“I’ve got you,” Tom says, kissing the back of Bill’s neck and slowly screwing into him.

Bill almost melts. Tom’s spooning him, fucking him so slowly he can barely feel the movements, and pinching his nipples. It feels amazing, so different, so good. Bill arches back into Tom and moves with him, the sheets rustling with their slow grinding.

“Touch me,” Bill says.

“Okay,” Tom replies breathlessly, attaching his lips back onto Bill’s neck and sliding his hand down Bill’s torso, to his cock. Bill whines as Tom touches him softly. As Tom touches him, Bill slowly squeezes and releases around Tom’s dick. It’s making Tom gasp again and again. “Bill, oh, Bill, this feels so… You’re so…”

Bill sighs deeply as Tom strokes his dick just right and jerks his hips back against Tom. Tom is taken in down to the hilt and Bill throws his head back in a silent scream. His cock throbs and then he comes against his belly in slow, pleasurable waves.

It’s the quietest and most intense orgasm of his life. He almost feels like crying, but he keeps it together as Tom jabs into him a few more times and comes, too.

Bill can feel a light swirling inside of him and he grins, squeezing Tom, making him cry out.

“Too much, too much,” Tom says, pulling out. “Oh my God.” They both wince at the movement.

“God,” Bill sighs, relaxing against his brother, curling into him. He turns around so that they’re facing each other, their foreheads touching.

“I came in you,” Tom says, sounding amazed. “And…”

Bill smiles, he can feel Tom’s orgasm inside him. “Mm, you did so good, Tomi.”

“Really?”

“The best.” And Bill means it. He nuzzles Tom’s shoulder, and Tom tips Bill’s chin up and kisses him soundly.

When their lips part, Tom sighs, stroking Bill’s hair and face and neck. Bill blinks slowly, leaning into the touch.

“I really wish you’d have been my first,” Bill murmurs. “Because this…”

“I know.”

“I mean it.”

“Well,” Tom says, kissing Bill’s chin. “I’m gonna be the first to stick around.”

Bill laughs a little, wrinkling his nose against Tom’s cheek. “I’ll tell you a secret. They all want to stick around.”

“Shut up, Bill,” Tom says. “I’m not going anywhere, and I’ve already got your number.”

“Maybe I’ll change my number,” Bill says, teasingly.

“Won’t matter, I know where you live,” Tom points out.

“Then I’ll move.”

“Oh yeah?”

Bill laughs, kisses Tom’s shoulder. “Yeah. And will you come with me?”

Tom finds Bill’s hand and winds their fingers together. He squeezes Bill’s hand. “Anywhere.”

It’s the first of many nights spent wrapped up together, the first of many sweet fucks and whispered endearments, and the last of the many, many men in Bill’s life.

Now there’s just one man, and it doesn’t matter if he’s gay or straight, he’s Tom and that’s enough.

First of Many, 2/3

Thu, 22 May 2008 01:57:51 GMT

Title: First of Many 2/3
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: bill/andreas, bill/OMCs, tomxbill
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: In bed he tells everyone that they're his first, but what happens when Bill falls in love for the first time?

Klaus wasn’t the first and he definitely won’t be the last.

While the experience afterwards with Klaus had put a bad taste in Bill’s mouth, Bill’s hooked. It’d been too easy to get what he wanted and then even easier to get rid of what he wanted when he hadn’t wanted it anymore.

Bill had realized he could get away with murder just by batting his eyelashes or feigning a coy smile. “You’re my first” was the best pick up line he could’ve ever dreamed up; it had men nearly falling at his feet.

They all wanted to be his first, all of the straight guys who’d never even thought of fucking a guy. But Bill isn’t just any guy, he’s pretty. He’s confusing. He’s irresistible.

And even more so now that he’s been working at it. He’s really changed his look, growing his hair out and refining his makeup. He wears clothes that cling to his slender body, and he’d gotten a tattoo on his hip, knowing all the attention it would attract to the area.

Bill thrives on it, he loves the power he feels when bending straight men to his will.

And he’s done it again. He’s got a man on his arm, and they’re stumbling down the hotel corridor with one common thing on their minds. His name is Axel and he’s an important guy; he owns the venue they’d just performed in, and Bill’d had his eye on him the moment they’d been introduced. This man, this powerful, handsome man, has to be his.

“Where’s your room, which one is it?” Axel asks gruffly, tugging at his necktie.

Bill crashes into him, looping an arm around Axel’s waist. “Just down here, room forty five.”

Axel has a family. A wife and kids. He’s as straight as they come, and as Bill fumbles in his pocket for the room key, he feels his pants tighten. Axel has his arm around Bill’s shoulders and he’s massaging the back of Bill’s neck, making Bill’s skin tingle.

“Mmm, here we are,” Bill says, throwing Axel against the corridor wall. He’s grown a few inches, now he’s a solid six feet and he can really kiss a guy. And he does. He holds Axel’s shoulder and lays a wet kiss on his lips, licking down his chin and nipping at his neck.

Axel moans, his fingers creeping just beneath the waist of Bill’s jeans. “Fuck, get us inside.”

“Be patient,” Bill says sweetly, clicking the door open with the keycard. He gives Axel one last smirk before tumbling inside, dragging the man with him.

When he gets into the room, he sees a girl on the bed, her legs spread up in the air, and Tom’s face is between her thighs. Tom’s going down on her, and he’s really working at it.

“Tom!” Bill screeches. Axel coughs next to him, drawing back a little.

Tom looks up, eyes wide. “Bill…”

The girl closes her thighs and her cheeks turn pink. “Oh…”

Bill just stares at Tom, the image of his brother eating the girl out burned into his mind. He licks his lips, feeling his groin tighten more.

“Sorry, sorry!” Bill says, waving the two off and grabbing at Axel’s arm.

“Bill, maybe I should—” Axel’s trying to tug out of Bill’s grasp.

Bill shakes his head and shoves Axel into the bathroom. He can hear Tom calling after him, but he isn’t listening. He slams the bathroom door, locking it, and shoving Axel up against it.

“Get in me,” Bill says, voice harsh, demanding. “Now.”

“Bill, your brother—”

Bill doesn’t want to think about his brother, doesn’t want to think too hard about why he’s suddenly so turned on, why he’s ready to come without being touched.

“Just fuck me, he won’t come in,” Bill says. Why is he so desperate for this?

Axel’s brow creases, his hands spanning the width of Bill’s waist possessively. Bill can tell he’s hard, the poor guy’s been hard all day as Bill’s played with him.

“But you’re… this is your first time,” Axel says. “And I didn’t want—”

“What I want is your dick in me,” Bill says. “Now, Axel. Fuck me or get the fuck out.”

Axel’s mouth drops open for a moment before he’s forcing Bill back against the glass shower door. Their mouths meet and Axel presses a hard, almost painful kiss to Bill’s lips. Bill gasps and nearly slides down to the floor, he can tell this is going to be a good one.

“First time should be special,” Axel murmurs.

“Yeah, yeah,” Bill moans, closing his eyes. Axel’s hands are fumbling at Bill’s belt, working quick to undo then, and Bill is feeling all over Axel’s chest. He’s a real man; he doesn’t work out, he’s not very toned, but he’s thick and solid and hard against Bill.

Bill moans, he can hear Tom in the other room. He can hear the television click on, and the door shut. Did he kick the girl out? He pictures Tom with her in his mind, Tom licking the girl inside, hard, making her toes curl.

He looks down and Axel has Bill’s pants and boxers off. Bill’s hard, pressing into Axel’s hip. “Let me see your dick,” Bill whispers.

Axel raises his eyebrow and Bill grabs his necktie, pulling him closer. They kiss as Bill works the button and fly of Axel’s suit trousers. He manages to tug them down, along with his plaid boxers. ‘So straight,’ Bill thinks as he leans back, letting go of the necktie.

“Turn around, hold onto the counter,” Axel commands.

“Condom,” Bill replies.

Axel nods, he pulls a condom out of his wallet and grins.

“Cheat on your wife with other girls?” Bill asks, smirking.

Axel shrugs, opening the package and tossing it in the trash can. “Not just girls. Well, after tonight.”

Bill rolls his eyes. What a pig. But still, he grabs some lotion that’s sitting on the counter and hands it to Axel. “Make sure it’s nice and slippery.”

“Oh, and you would know,” Axel says darkly. “Let me handle this.”

“Handle me,” Bill shoots back. “C’mon, let’s do this.”

“Pushy little virgin,” Axel says. His hands caress down Bill’s body, gently stroking down his ass. “Fuck, you have a nice ass.”

“Just…” Bill whines as Axel teases him with soft touches. Axel kisses the back of Bill’s neck and Bill squirms, tenses.

“Woah, calm down,” Axel says. “It’s gonna hurt if you don’t relax.”

“I’m relaxed, okay?” Bill grits his teeth, he just wants Axel to shove it in there and pump into him. He hasn’t been laid in weeks, the tours been too stressing, and now he needs a good fuck more than ever.

Just like Tom obviously needed a fuck. And Bill knows it’s been more than weeks for Tom, Bill knows it’s been months. Tom doesn’t just fuck anyone, he’s a stand up sort of guy.

He’s the kind of guy who would never fall under Bill’s advances.

‘Because he’s your brother,’ Bill thinks and moans out as Axel finally gets a finger in him.

“Quick, quick,” Bill manages, looking over his shoulder and wincing at Axel. “Come on, I can take it.”

“Calm down, sweetheart, we’re taking this slow,” Axel replies, carefully curling his finger in Bill.

“Oh – god, no,” Bill cries out, pushing back. “Get it in me!”

“You’ll be sorry,” Axel mumbles. He juts his finger harshly in Bill, and Bill whimpers. “You can’t just-”

“Who have you ever fucked in the ass?” Bill whines. “Just do it, I know I can take you.”

“I’ve had girls like you before,” Axel says, taking his finger out and grinding his hard dick against Bill’s ass. “They say they’re innocent but…”

He spreads Bill’s ass and pushes his cock in, just the tip. Bill moans and leans forward, grabbing the counter top.

“Yeah, they were lying to me,” Axel goes on, shoving his dick deeper inside. “I’ll play your game, though. You’re playing mine.”

Bill rolls his eyes again and as soon as Axel’s all the way in him, he braces himself against the counter and pushes his ass back, forcing Axel to fuck him recklessly. Axel growls, his hands firmly on Bill’s hips, fingernails digging in. Bill bites his lip, watching himself get fucked in the fogged up mirror.

“Like what you see?” Axel breathes, slamming into Bill. “Looks good to me…”

“Mmm,” Bill sighs out, staring hard at the reflection. He glances at Axel, his face so focused and gruff. “Oh, oh, god, you’re so fucking big…”

“It’s your tight little ass,” Axel replies through gritted teeth. He cringes, leaning forward and groaning. “Oh, shit… Oh, shit!”

Bill assumes that Axel has just come hard inside him, and Bill’s still hard, almost bursting. He keeps moving his hips, rotating, forcing Axel’s dick to hit the good spot inside him.

Suddenly, the image of Tom going at it between that girl’s legs flashes into his mind. Bill cries out and his knees almost buckle. He comes hard against his own palm and lets out a ragged moan, almost sinking to the floor.

But Axel holds him up, presses him into the counter and grinds his dick deeper into Bill. He licks up the back of Bill’s neck and says, softly, “I’ve never shot my load so fast in my life, fuck, you’re amazing.”

Bill can guess what’s coming next.

“Can I get your number?”

“Ugh!” Bill bucks his hips back, twisting and forcing Axel out of him. “Is it all the same with you straight men?” He bends down and tugs up his boxers and jeans, hardly giving Axel time to pull his own clothes on before he throws open the bathroom door.

He wipes his hand off right on Axel’s shirt and stomps out. Tom is standing beside him in a heartbeat, but Bill stomps past him, too.

“What did you do?” Tom asks, getting up in the older man’s face. Tom couldn’t take the guy in a fight even if he tried, so Bill’s glad when Axel just pushes past him.

“Bill,” Axel says, but Tom steps in his path.

“Out,” Tom says.

“Yeah, out,” Bill mumbles, turning his back to look out the window. He wants Axel out now.

“You can’t throw me out,” Axel says, smirking. “I’m your first.” His tone is sarcastic and Bill’s shoulders tense.

“He used that line on you?” Tom snorts. “He uses that line on everyone.”

Axel shakes his head, folding his arms. “I believed it up until he forced my dick in his ass.” He turns, opens the door. “Goodnight.”

“You need a new line,” is all Tom says to Bill as he shuts the door.

“Tom, what’s wrong with you??” Bill sputters.

“What’s wrong with me? What the fuck is wrong with you, Bill? I can’t believe you did that!” Tom says, looking flustered. “I told Cyndi to get out as soon as I saw… you and him, whatever. It was embarrassing, Bill,” he adds, blushing.

“I wanted… needed to get laid,” Bill replies easily. “What?”

“Fuck, Bill,” Tom groans. “All you think about is sex, which is really funny, considering our public images. Really fucking funny, Bill. I’m supposed to be the one who’s getting all this sex.”

Bill starts to snicker. Tom may wear really baggy clothes, but he’s sporting an erection right now and Tom seems really frustrated about it. He slowly walks over to Tom, softening his expression. “Jesus, Tom, how long has it been for you?”

“Not long. Fuck. I don’t know. Really long time. Months.”

“How many?”

“Five or six,” Tom mumbles. “And that wasn’t even sex.”

“Poor big brother,” Bill says, trying not to laugh because Tom seems pretty embarrassed. Bill stares at Tom, chewing at his lip, and then he gets an idea. “Hey, Tomi. I’ll help you out… Shut your eyes, okay?”

“Um, what?”

“Close your eyes,” Bill says calmly. “I’ll jerk you off.”

“You’re fucking crazy.”

“And you’re about to rip your pants open,” Bill says, cracking a grin.

“Bill, jeeze, this isn’t even funny,” Tom says.

Bill laughs. “Sorta is.” He bumps Tom in the arm, sidles up close and tugs at Tom’s belt. “C’mon, it is.”

“Biiiill, shut up.” Tom backs up and flops down on his bed, the same bed he’d had the girl on. Bill bites at his lip and sits down next to Tom. “It’s not funny that I can’t even get laid and that’d I’d have to resort to…”

“You can get laid,” Bill says. “If I can, you can.”

“Yeah, but you lie,” Tom whines. He moves away from Bill but Bill scoots even closer. “Bill, not so close.”

“Tomi, you’re a really great guy, you’ll get a girl.”

“I had one,” Tom says. “I maybe liked her, too, and then you brought like a forty year old guy back and ruined it!”

Bill should apologize or at least get off Tom’s lap, because that’s where he’s ended up, but instead he brings his hand down to Tom’s groin and squeezes. Tom lets out a startled moan, his hips jerking up.

“Bill, stop,” Tom hisses, but he makes no move to stop his brother.

“Just relax, close your eyes,” Bill says, pushing lightly on Tom’s chest, laying him flat on his back. Tom protests but lets Bill ease him down.

With his hat off and his expression so unsure, Bill actually thinks Tom looks… hot.

“Yeah, close your eyes,” Bill says again. “This won’t work if you don’t relax.”

“Fuck, I know how a handjob works,” Tom groans. He obediently shuts his eyes, though, and Bill starts to unbuckle Tom’s belt. His fingers brush across Tom’s hip and Tom’s hips jerk. “God, Bill.”

“I’m not Bill, I’m… What was her name? Sara?”

“Cyndi,” Tom murmurs.

“Yeah, her. Oooh, you’re so hot, Tom,” Bill says in a sassy tone. He’s got Tom’s jeans open and he’s tugging them down, along with his boxers. Tom’s dick is exposed, hot and ready, bright red with arousal. “Jeez, Tom, you’re…”

“What?” Tom doesn’t open his eyes, but his face scrunches up.

Bill swallows hard. Tom looks good, really good. His dick is slender, not too big, not hairy at all, and his balls are tight and smooth. Nothing like the older men Bill’s been with. Tom’s cock is really attractive.

“Nothing,” Bill says, passing his palm over the tip. Tom flinches, his eyes squeezed tightly shut. “This is gonna feel so good, Tomi.”

“Only my brother Bill calls me that,” Tom grits out.

“Oh. Sorry,” Bill replies, wrapping a hand around Tom’s cock and squeezing. Tom cries out and Bill jerks him hard, not entirely sure how to do it, but doing it anyway. He’s always been one to jump right in.

He moves his hand slowly at first, watching Tom’s thighs tense, watching his stomach tighten at each stroke. He must be doing it right.

“Bill, ahhh,” Tom groans.

“Sara,” Bill corrects.

“Cyndi,” Tom says. “It’s Cyndi, ah, fuck, Billllll…”

Bill’s smile widens and he jerks Tom’s cock faster, harder. “God, it has been forever for you, hasn’t it?”

“Uhhh… oh God, oh… yes, yes it has.” Tom’s head falls back and his hips arch up. His eyes are still squeezed shut. “Bill, what are you… fuck, what are you doing?”

Bill’s twisting his hand around the tip, pressing a finger into the slit, and watching Tom shake.

“Feels good?” Bill asks, suddenly less smug. He’s watching Tom’s face, watching him bite at his lip and squirm. “Tomi?”

“Ohhh… oh my God,” is Tom’s response.

Bill tugs up on Tom’s dick, feels how wet it’s getting, how hard and hot. He watches it and groans.

Tom’s hips are rotating, his face is screwed up and his hands are just touching Bill’s thighs.

“Bill, Bill,” Tom murmurs, his eyes opening and connecting with Bill’s. “Uh…”

Bill feels something swirl in the pit of his belly. “Good?” he whispers.

Tom nods, his eyes dark. Bill gives his dick one long, hard stroke, and with a jerk of his hips, Tom comes bashfully in three jagged thrusts.

Bill looks at his hand, covered in his brother’s come. He doesn’t know what to do, he doesn’t know what to say. Normally after a guy fucks him, he has something sassy to say. But this isn’t the same, this isn’t that situation at all.

Tom props himself up on his elbows and pulls his boxers up, covering himself modestly. He isn’t looking at Bill anymore; his cheeks are flushed and he’s shaking a little.

“Hey Tomi,” Bill says softly.

Tom finally looks at him.

Bill smiles a little. “You were my first.”

“Oh, Jesus Christ, Bill,” Tom spits out, sitting up and making a face. “Your first what? Bullshit. I can’t believe you’d pull that shit on me.”

Bill frowns. “No, I swear, I’ve never jerked a guy off before.”

Tom’s face clouds over. “Oh, congratulations. You jerked your brother off,” he says, almost angrily. “Good job, Bill. Don’t talk to me anymore.”

He gives Bill one last withering glance and then rolls over, pulling the covers over him.

Bill stares at his brother, feeling hurt. He doesn’t get it. What’s the problem?

**

No one can stay mad at Bill for long, least of all Tom. They’re made up and back to their quirky little relationship the very next day and things go back to normal.

As normal as they can be, anyway.

Bill keeps being Bill, meaning that his fascination and attraction to straight men is still going strong, and Tom keeps being Tom. Bashful, sweet, warm, big brother Tom.

Bill gets warm fuzzies just thinking of his older brother. The handjob, though obviously a mistake not to be repeated, has made Bill appreciate Tom all the more. Tom is a good guy, a beautiful guy, a straight guy.

Sometimes Bill can get hard just thinking about the confusion and resistance that had been all over Tom’s face.

But things are normal now. Yeah. As normal as they can be.

One evening, Bill is getting up to his usual trouble again. He’s leading a guy up the stairs of the apartment above the band studio. This guy is hot; he’s signed under the same label as Tokio Hotel and Bill had picked him up at a party tonight. His name is Jacques; he’s an import from France, and he’d had Bill as soon as he’d explained about his little French girlfriend back home.

So Bill’s got him by the hem of his shirt, he’s laughing as he pulls Jacques into the studio, feeling high as they push through the door to the apartment.

Bill’s high fades away when he sees his brother sitting on the couch, sulking.

“Tomi,” he mumbles, putting a hand on Jacques’s chest.

Tom glances up, and he looks so blue. “Oh, hey.”

Bill wants to run to Tom, sit with him, rub his back, ask what’s wrong. But of course he can’t; he’s got this straight guy on his arm.

“Jacques,” Bill says softly, turning to the Frenchman and trying to look demure. “I don’t… I don’t know if I’m quite ready.”

Jacques looks upset, but his face softens. “It’s not a problem, Bill… I understand. Your first time should be just right.”

Tom looks down, his shoulders shaking a little with silent laughter.

“Yeah,” Bill replies. “I’m sorry, I thought I was… ready.”

Jacques nods. “Well, I go back to France in a couple of days. Maybe we can hook up some other time. Can I get your number?”

Bill inwardly groans. Jacques’s showing his true colors and they haven’t even fucked yet. “I’ll see you around,” is all Bill says.

“Can I give you mine?”

“Oh, Jesus Christ, go home to your fucking girlfriend,” Bill snaps impatiently.

Jacques just gives Bill a strange look, and leaves without a word.

“Bill, you didn’t have to kick him out because I’m being a baby,” Tom mumbles as Bill sits beside him, silently.

“He was too clingy anyway, it doesn’t even matter,” Bill says. He cuddles up close, holding onto Tom’s arm. “What’s wrong, Tomi?”

“It’s seriously nothing,” Tom says. “It’s just… Belinda and I…”

Bill frowns, touches Tom’s face. Belinda is Tom’s girlfriend, his first real one. They’ve been dating for four months, four whole months and Tom’s smitten. Or he was.

Now he just looks miserable.

“Oh Tomi, did you break up?” Bill asks.

Tom nods, not looking up. “She broke up with me. She did. She thinks I cheated on her. Again.”

“But of course you didn’t,” Bill says. “Right?”

Tom stiffens and shoves Bill off him, standing and frowning so hard his face looks pained. “Of course I didn’t, I thought you of all people would know that. Jesus, and she… I thought she… I don’t know, I didn’t think she bought into all of that media hype.”

Bill stands and grabs hold of Tom’s hand. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it and she’s obviously a bitch. Okay? She just doesn’t know you, it isn’t your fault.”

Tom smiles a little and doesn’t push Bill away this time. “She was sort of a bitch, I guess.”

“I hated her,” Bill admits.

“Seriously?” Tom asks. He squeezes Bill’s hand. “You never said anything.”

“Of course I didn’t, you liked her,” Bill says. “I’d never… I don’t know, fuck it up just because I think she’s a bitch or something.”

“Yeah, well, next time tell me, you seemed to know more about her than I did,” Tom says. He sits, pulling Bill down beside him on the couch.

Bill stares at his brother carefully, touching his shoulder. “You’re gonna be okay.”

Tom shrugs. “Yeah, I’ve got you, don’t I?”

Bill grins, rolling his eyes. “Lucky you.”

“Lucky me,” Tom teases, nudging Bill.

Bill rests his fingers on Tom’s leg and squeezes a little. He’s thinking of the time he’d made Tom feel better, the time he’d jerked Tom off and made him come. Bill thinks about it a lot, actually. He wonders if maybe he can make Tom feel better again.

“Tomi, you do have me, you know,” Bill says softly.

“Yeah,” Tom replies vaguely.

Bill starts rubbing Tom’s thigh, sliding his hand up his leg, close to where it meets his hip. Tom flinches, but doesn’t move away. He keeps his eyes on Bill’s hand, watches with mild interest.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Tom asks.

“I can make you feel better,” Bill says, smiling. “Like before. You felt so good, I know you did.”

Tom groans, pulling his leg away. “Not this again.”

“Why?”

“Bill,” Tom says, making a face. “Not only am I your brother… but I’m not gay.”

“Wrong answer,” Bill says and slides his hand up further.

Tom groans again and knocks Bill’s hand away. “I’m fine, I swear. But, uh, thanks for caring?”

Bill rolls his eyes and looks down in Tom’s lap, he’s hard. “Yeah,” Bill says. “Maybe I care too much.”

Tom laughs, grabs Bill’s hand, brings it to his mouth and kisses it. Not only is Tom hard, but he’s doing that adorable little blushing, head dipping thing that makes Bill all gooey.
“Maybe just a bit,” Tom says. “Anyway…”

“Movie?”

“If you can keep your hands to yourself.”

Bill sticks out his tongue and grabs the remote. “Yeah, because you’re so irresistible, Tomi.”

And when Tom smiles like that, he really is.

First of Many, 1/3

Wed, 21 May 2008 14:35:17 GMT

Title: First of Many 1/3
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: bill/andreas, bill/OMCs, tomxbill
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: In bed he tells everyone that they're his first, but what happens when Bill falls in love for the first time?

Bill arches up, clutching at Andreas’s shoulders and gasping.

“Are you okay?” Andreas asks. He’s sweating on Bill, trembling, and rocking into his best friend with sloppy, unlearned strokes.

They’re fucking for the first time. Their first time together and their first time fucking period.

“I’m… I’m fine,” Bill gasps out. “It’s so... full, you’re so…”

They’re both tipsy, just enough to feel a little more comfortable, a little less awkward.

“Bill, you’re so tight, so… uh, so fuckin’ good,” Andreas says. “But… I’m not gay.”

“This doesn’t make you gay, this makes you a really fucking good friend,” Bill says. They’re fourteen and Bill had been after Andreas for months – not because he likes him or anything. Andreas is his best friend and nothing more, nothing less.

But it’s August and Bill is leaving to go on his first tour very soon, and he can’t possibly have go out into the world as a virgin. He needs to have sex, at least once, and he doesn’t want it with a girl. Who better to trust than his closest friend?

Bill sighs and presses his lips to Andreas’s neck, feeling Andreas thrust in deeper, harder. It hurts but it’s what he wants.

“Oh, wow,” Bill breathes, holding on tighter. “That’s…”

“Fucking amazing,” Andreas murmurs. “I… I…”

Andreas shudders over Bill and thrusts hard once, trembling and falling forward.

“Did you?” Bill frowns a little and Andreas pulls out. He’d wanted more, even if it’d hurt like hell. He can feel Andreas’s come sliding down his thighs and ass. “Oh, Jesus…”

“Sorry,” Andreas says quickly, squeezing Bill’s slender hips. “God, I- That was so… Are you gonna?”

Bill lets his head fall back and he presses his hips against Andreas, grinding his cock. “I really want to…”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t… make you that way,” Andreas groans. He looks perfectly blissed out, hazy with heavy lidded eyes. “Here, let me…”

“Oh…” Bill glances down as Andreas takes his cock into his hands and strokes, hard and sloppy. Bill lets out a ragged sigh and can still feel Andreas’s come slipping out of him. He smiles weakly; he’s just been fucked, that’s what that means. He reaches down to his ass and feels the warm liquid.

“Are you close?” Andreas asks, fisting Bill’s cock.

And as Bill nods, fingering his satisfyingly sore hole, he comes hard in Andreas’s hands.

**

Bill cracks an eye open the next morning, feeling sweaty and worn out. Someone is petting his shoulder and as he opens his other eye and looks to the side, he remembers.

He’s not a virgin anymore. His best friend Andreas fucked him last night. They’re still in bed together.

“God,” Bill groans, propping himself up on his elbows. He’s still naked, still sticky with come. “Oh, fuck. Ouch.” His entire body is sore and his ass feels raw.

“Sore?” Andreas asks, dipping his head down to kiss Bill’s neck. Bill moves away from the gentle touch. “Didn’t mean to be so hard on you, but I couldn’t help it.”

“It’s okay, it was… I liked it, even if hurt,” Bill says.

Andreas grins and rolls over onto Bill, kissing him gently, wetly. “I’m so glad I was your first, that you were mine,” he whispers. He’s being so tender and it makes Bill bristle. He tries to push Andreas away, but he’s too intent on nuzzling Bill.

“Yeah, me too,” Bill says. “You’re a good friend.”

“More than that,” Andreas says. He caresses Bill’s arms. “I’ve always… loved you.”

Bill makes a face. “You’re not gay, you’re straight.”

“Not so straight, am I?” He kisses Bill again, stroking his face. “Now I know what that love means, Bill. I know I love you, I’m in love with you. If that makes me gay, I don’t care.”

Something inside Bill aches, but not in a good way, not in the way he ached so hard last night. Last night Bill thought of Andreas as straight, as his best friend he’d always flirted with. Flirting with Andreas had been naughty, slightly dangerous and exciting.

Now… now Andreas is getting all mushy on him. Bill doesn’t want Andreas to want him, not like this.

“Andreas, maybe we—”

Andreas kisses Bill and presses between his legs. “Too sore?” he asks, nudging his hard cock at Bill’s hole.

Bill shakes his head dumbly, but the last thing he wants is a mushy best friend all over him. But then Andreas is in him and Bill almost wants to roll his eyes. Andreas humps into him, whimpering and holding Bill close, whispering endearments.

‘Ugh,’ Bill thinks. ‘Let’s get this over with.’

“You feel so sweet, so good,” Andreas sighs into Bill’s ear, holding himself in Bill, tensing and relaxing. “You smell so good, like sex. Our sex, Bill.”

“You’re a good fuck,” Bill says tiredly.

“Gonna get hard for me?” Andreas asks, reaching between them to pet Bill’s cock. “You’re soft, Bill, normally I like how soft you are but right now, I want hard.”

Bill bites his lip; he feels something tingling in his belly, especially as Andreas’s dick caresses his prostate right on. It feels good. Not as good as last night, of course. Last night had been raw passion, years of flirtation coming to a head. Now Andreas is in love and Bill can barely get it up.

Andreas moves in Bill, softly, lovingly. Bill grips Andreas’s back and bucks his hips, trying to get into it. His cock is finally perking up a bit, because Andreas is hitting his spot so good, even if it’s not as hard as Bill wants it. Andreas leans down to kiss Bill’s lips and Bill turns his head away.

“Bill, what?” Andreas asks. He stills his movements. “What’s the matter?”

“Keep going.”

“Why won’t you kiss me?” Andreas frowns.

“Head hurts, got a hang over,” Bill lies.

“You barely drank.” Andreas is so deep in Bill that when he pulls out, Bill actually gasps. “Bill, what’s going on?”

Bill sits up, wincing at the pain in his ass. “Andi, I should get going.”

“Huh?”

“Last night was so good. I’ll remember it forever. But hey, it’s okay, you know? You’re not gay, I know you aren’t. We’re friends, Andi. I don’t need you to, you know, make it more than what it was,” Bill says, reaching for his shirt.

Andreas’s face falls. “But I love you-”

“No, you’re straight,” Bill says firmly.

“Not anymore.”

Bill groans softly. “Really? You’re sure?”

“Yes, more sure than anything,” Andreas says, gathering some sheets at his waist. “You don’t… like me?”

“I like you, we’re friends.”

“But you don’t… you aren’t in love with me?” Andreas asks. “Bill, I—”

“Please, don’t,” Bill says. “I wouldn’t have, if I’d known… Shit.” Bill stands, wobbling, and pulls his shirt on, his jeans on. He winces as he tugs up his jeans. “I need to go.”

“Bill…” Andreas reaches out for Bill, but Bill steps back. “Don’t go, let’s talk about this.”

“I don’t wanna talk,” Bill says. “About like… feelings and shit. I just want to remember this as what it was. We fucked. That’s it. I’m not a virgin anymore and maybe now Tom will stop making fun of me.”

“This was about Tom?”

“Of course not.” Bill’s cheeks heat up; he especially doesn’t want to talk now. “I’m gonna take off, okay? I’ll call you later.”

Andreas’s brows crease. “Whatever, Bill.”

“Um, what?”

“It’s nothing, I’ll see you later.” Andreas is staring at the wall, he’s obviously pissed. “Bye.”

“Andi…” Bill throws his messenger bag over his shoulder and folds his arms. “Don’t be weird.”

“I’m not. You’re the one who’s being weird. Bye.”

Bill just shrugs and leaves. He doesn’t feel like arguing, talking, discussing, anything. He’d just wanted a fuck. He’d wanted to see what it felt like before he left.

He hadn’t expected it to come with so much extra shit.

When he gets home, he kicks his shoes off and drops his bag in the hallway. Glancing in the mirror, he smiles a little. He looks like he got fucked, and fucked good.

Tom wanders down the stairs, eating a sandwich. “Hey, Bill.”

“Hey, Tomi,” Bill mumbles, still staring in the mirror.

“How’s Andi?”

“God, he’s weird.”

Tom laughs. “Yeah, he is. What’d he do this time?”

“Fucked me.”

“Yeah,” Tom says, smirking.

“No, he did. We fucked. Not a virgin anymore, so quit the remarks,” Bill says, grinning.

Tom nearly chokes on his sandwich. “Shit, really? With… with Andreas? But he’s straight.”

Bill makes a face; that’s a sour subject at the moment. “Yeah,” Bill says.

“Are you?” Tom asks.

“What? Straight?” Bill laughs and now Tom makes a face. “What do you think?”

Tom shrugs. “Oh. Well, it doesn’t matter.”

Bill smiles and Tom slings an arm around his shoulder. “Really, you don’t care?”

“Nah.” Tom squeezes his arm. “You two dating or something?”

“Ugh, no,” Bill says. “He was all… touchy feely.”

Tom laughs. “He has such a crush on you, doesn’t he?”

Bill bites his lip, shoves at Tom. “Let’s watch TV and get drunk.”

“In the middle of the afternoon?”

“Yeah, Mom’s not home,” Bill says with a wink.

Tom laughs and squeezes Bill again. “Okay, okay.” They walk into the living room after snagging a few beers. “So… what ammo do I have to make fun of you now?”

Bill screws up his face and pops open a beer. “Don’t know. Take your best shot.”

“Andreas loves you,” Tom teases.

“Shut up!” Bill scowls, taking a long sip of the beer. “I was into him until he started with that shit.”

Tom shrugs, reclines on the couch and rests his beer on his chest. “Maybe Andreas just isn’t the right girl for you.”

“Must be it,” Bill replies sarcastically. “You can have him.”

“Some of us,” Tom says, “are actually straight.”

“God, I wish Andreas was.”

“So, what, you’re only into straight guys?” Tom jokes. As he laughs, the beer balanced on his chest topples off and spills on the floor. The twins both gasp; the dark liquid is slowly staining their mother’s light carpets.

“Shit,” Bill says dumbly. “And no, I am not only into straight guys. I just haven’t met any gay guys. I’m sure I’ll be into them.” He pauses, gazing at the spilled beer. “Are you just gonna leave that?”

“Eh, it’ll dry.” Tom turns the TV on and they spend the rest of the afternoon there, drinking and hanging out.

**

“So, the tour is going well?” Andreas asks.

Bill shifts in his bunk, adjusting the phone against his ear. “Yeah, but we’re not talking about me! Tell me about this guy you met,” Bill says.

“You going on tour, playing sold out shows, and being on TV is way more interesting than some guy I met at a dumb house party,” Andreas says.

Bill scoffs. He’s actually surprised as all hell that Andreas is still playing the gay card. Bill had thought that Andreas was just confused, that he was actually straight, but it’s three months after they first had sex and Andreas is still at it.

“I want to hear about you,” Bill says.

“I will tell you all about Greg once you spill the beans about this guy you’ve been freaking out about,” Andreas says.

Bill laughs. “Fuck, I don’t know…”

“Gonna break his heart like you did mine?” The tone is light, joking, but Bill can still hear the pain in his best friend’s voice.

“God, no,” Bill says quickly. “His name is Klaus. He’s straight.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“Yeah, he has a girlfriend,” Bill says. “And he’s like thirty or something.”

“Like age has anything to do with it,” Andreas says with a chuckle.

“I didn’t even want him to fuck me until I found out he had a girlfriend,” Bill admits. “He’s on the tour, one of the crew men. He’s really good with his hands.”

“Fuck, I’m hard. What’s he look like?”

Bill frowns; it’s a little strange to be talking about hot guys with Andreas. “Um, he’s tall… Taller than me. Dark hair, tan. He looks Greek or something. So hot. Has a girlfriend, like I said… What are you doing?”

“Nothing.”

“Are you jacking off?” Bill asks.

“Maybe…”

Bill laughs; he’s getting a little hard, too. “I’m gonna have him,” he decides, palming his cock through his jeans. “I’m gonna get him to fuck me.”

“Easy,” Andreas says. “I bet you can.”

“No, he’s straight,” Bill replies. “He’s really, really straight. Like, Tom straight.”

Andreas groans. “You’re always going on about straight guys…”

Bill squeezes his groin and feels his toes tingle. Straight guys, that really gets Bill off, and Andreas has a point; every guy Bill has been into has been straight. “Shit, is that a coincidence?” Bill says.

“Um… You said you weren’t even interested in this guy until you found out he had a girlfriend,” Andreas says, sounding a little out of breath. “Then there was that guy you were telling me about from a nightclub, you watched him make out with a girl all night. Then there was, what was his name? I don’t know, but you had it bad for him and he was dating Gustav’s sister. Oh yeah, and there was me.”

Bill makes a face. “I guess so.”

Andreas doesn’t even answer, Bill can hear him moaning softly.

“Andi,” Bill says. “Hey, I’m gonna hang up.”

“What? Oh, yeah. Talk to you later, Bill.”

Bill says good night and snaps his phone shut. He’s hard, wants to touch himself, but his mind is racing with this new realization. Straight guys only? The thought alone makes Bill’s groin ache a little, pleasantly.

He’s only ever been with Andreas, when he thought Andreas was straight, so maybe he’d like gay guys, too? No, he’d run from Andreas when he’d found out the truth. Maybe he’s just afraid of commitment.

“Ugh,” Bill groans, and rolls over. He’s had enough thinking for the night, now he just wants a good wank.

**

“So,” Bill says, sidling up to Klaus back stage. They’re an hour from a concert, and Bill’s fucking around, following Klaus everywhere, as usual. “Are you gonna go out with us after the show?”

Klaus is messing with the lighting, but he turns to Bill, pinching his waist. “Hey kid.”

“Hey, I’m not a kid!” Bill whines.

Klaus pinches him again and Bill flushes, pleased. “I’ll be there,” Klaus says. He reaches up, tugs on Bill’s long bangs. “Bringing Serena.”

“I haven’t met her,” Bill says. “Is she prettier than me?”

Klaus laughs, focusing his attention back on the lights. “No one’s prettier than you.”

Bill grins. This is going to be a fun night and he’s ready for sex again.

**

Bill’s flirting hard with Klaus at the club, and the drinks are flowing. Klaus’s girlfriend is there, holding on tight to his arm. She’s pretty, but Bill knows he’s prettier. He’d made extra sure of that. His hair, usually pressed down flat in front of one eye and very severe, is tumbling over his forehead in soft curls. He’d stood in front of the mirror for ages, not smearing his black makeup around his eyes like usual, but carefully, delicately, and with some glitter.

They’ve been at the club for an hour and a half, and so far, Klaus hasn’t been able to keep his eyes off Bill. Bill, however, is playing hard to get. They’re sitting in a round booth, Bill and Serena either side of Klaus. The rest of the band and a few of their friends are crammed in beside them.

“So exhausted,” Bill says, stretching his body out and nudging Klaus’s leg with his foot. “Fuck, Klaus, you kept the lights right in my eyes tonight. Give someone else in the band a chance to be seen next time.”

“You liked it,” Klaus replies, leaning forward. “Always gotta be the center of attention.”

Tom scoffs next to Bill. Bill just smiles sweetly. “It’s not my fault you gave me all that extra attention.”

Serena gives a little laugh, but Bill can see Klaus’s cheeks turn a little red. He knows it’s time to act, he’s nervous but excited. If he’s being honest with himself, it’s the nervousness that’s making him so excited.

It’s the fact that Klaus is straight and older than him, that he’s confident and so… manly.

Bill shifts to the side and lays a delicate hand on Klaus’s knee. He squeezes teasingly and Klaus gasps and stares down at the table. Bill’s tipsy enough to smooth his hand up Klaus’s thigh, dangerously close to his groin. This is definitely crossing the line and Bill is too on edge to look up and see the reaction on Klaus’s face.

Instead, he gives Klaus’s thigh another squeeze, digging his nails in.

“I say at tomorrow’s concert, keep the lights on Gustav,” Georg says. “No one else.”

Gustav grunts. “How’d I end up getting involved in this?”

“Look at him, he’s a star,” Georg says, pinching Gustav’s cheeks as the other boy scowls and ducks away.

Bill’s hand is creeping up further, he’s pleased to realize that the higher he slides his fingers, the tighter Klaus’s jeans seem to become. He also feels a hotness. There’s definite heat radiating from the handsome crew member’s groin. Bill licks his lips and dares to glance at Klaus.

There’s a bead of sweat forming at Klaus’s temple, and he looks… antsy.

“No, keep the lights on me,” Bill says, grinning. He actually squeezes the bulge in Klaus’s jeans and Klaus coughs, jerking under the table.

“Tell you kids what,” he says, taking a long sip of water. “You can all perform in the dark, I’m calling in sick tomorrow.”

“No,” Bill cries, pouting. “And I’m not a kid,” he adds, giving Klaus his most winsome smile and squeezing his bulge again.

Klaus turns to Bill and gives him a hard stare. “I’ll bet you’re not.”

Bill flushes and turns back to his drink, sipping innocently. Beside him, Tom is fumbling with the hem on his shirt and Bill frowns at him. “What’s wrong?”

Tom shrugs. “Tired.”

“Oh,” Bill says, disappointed. It probably means Tom will go to bed soon, which means Bill can’t bring a certain crew member back to his hotel room. “Come on, wake up. Some girl with huge tits has been staring at you all night.”

“Really?” Tom perks up a bit, his cheeks turning red. “Nah.”

“Yeah,” Bill insists, and at that moment, Klaus stands up. Bill turns to him, wide eyed. “Where are you going?”

“Not feeling well,” he replies through gritted teeth. “Bathroom.” He squeezes his girlfriend’s shoulder. “You okay for a few minutes?”

“I’m not a baby,” Serena says back.

“I’ll take care of her,” Georg says with a grin.

Klaus laughs and Bill steps on his foot under the table. “Yeah, yeah, I’ll be right back.”

“Okay,” Bill says, trying to suppress his grin. Klaus’s jeans are practically bursting, and he turns back to Tom, satisfied. “So, go talk to her.”

“Maybe,” Tom says vaguely.

Bill watches Klaus disappear into the bathroom across the club and something burns inside him; it’s now or never. He squeezes Tom’s shoulder and slips out of the booth. He has his eye on the bathroom door and his belly is swirling with need.

He doesn’t care if Klaus’s girlfriend is sitting right there, looking slightly concerned, or if Tom is looking after him with confused eyes.

He needs it now, needs what he knows Klaus can give him.

Before entering the bathroom, he adjusts his shirt; a tight little black number that buttons up the front. It’s different from what he normally wears, concert t-shirts and more boyish garb, but he wanted to look feminine, more adult.

He pushes open the bathroom door to find Klaus standing at the sink, splashing water on his face.

“Hello,” Bill says and Klaus jerks up, turning to stare at him.

“What are you doing here?” Klaus asks.

“It is a bathroom,” Bill says, moving closer. “But I don’t really have to… go.”

Klaus nods slowly. “Then… why….?”

“Checking up on you,” Bill says. He steps right up on Klaus’s feet and holds onto his shoulders. It’s a silly, intimate position and Klaus doesn’t pull back. He swallows hard and touches Bill softy at the small of his back. “But you’re not really sick, are you?”

“Oh, I’m sick alright,” he says, finally pushing Bill away. “Bill, I need to—”

“Klaus, I want you to fuck me,” Bill says and before Klaus can respond, Bill’s up on his tip toes, kissing him. He’s more than excited when Klaus groans into the kiss, shoving back hard until Bill’s against the wall.

“Oh fuck, Bill,” he says, ravishing Bill’s mouth, neck, whatever skin he can reach. “Fuck, fuck, I can’t. I can’t.”

“Klaus, please,” Bill says. “I… I want you to be my first.” Once the lie comes out, Bill isn’t even sure why he’s said it, but Klaus groans and thrusts hard against Bill, hands tightening on him. “Fuck me.”

“Jesus.” Klaus steps back, running a hand through his hair. “I… can’t.”

“I trust you, you know?” Bill says. He bats his eyelashes, or tries to, and flushes. “I trust you to do this for me. Please?”

“I have a girlfriend and I’m not…”

“I won’t tell her,” Bill whispers. “I won’t tell anyone. This is just for me, I really want you to be my… my first.”

Klaus’s face softens but he sighs, shaking his head and stroking Bill’s curls. “Kid, I can’t, I-”

Bill looks down. “No, I’m embarrassed, never mind.”

“Oh, fuck it,” Klaus murmurs, touching Bill’s shoulder and squeezing. “There’s a lot of creeps out there, and I like you a lot. I want to make sure your first time is… so good.” He massages behind Bill’s neck, kissing Bill on the lips.

Bill feels a personal victory and threads his fingers through Klaus’s. “Okay, but… I don’t want it to be in a bathroom, Klaus…”

And that’s how they end up sneaking out of the club and catching a cab back to the hotel. Klaus hadn’t even told his girlfriend he was leaving. Bill didn’t care. He was running on pure adrenaline, charged and ready.

He’s beginning to feel like Klaus really is his first, and in a way, he is. One of them, anyway. It doesn’t matter anymore. Bill has him and Klaus is first in a long line of Bill getting what he wants.

When the cab drops them off at the hotel, Bill’s all coy and aloof. He’s playing hard to get again, making Klaus work for it.

“My room?” Bill says casually, looking over his shoulder.

Klaus nods, almost tripping over his feet. “Y-yeah. I don’t want to fuck you on the bed my girlfriend’s gonna sleep in later.”

“Why?” Bill asks.

Klaus just groans and pushes Bill into the elevator. When the door shuts he has Bill against the mirrored wall and he’s kissing all up Bill’s neck, pushing his shirt up his chest, squeezing his hips. Bill is almost melting in Klaus’s hold; he can hardly hold himself together, and Klaus’s strong hands are roughing him up, making him shake.

Bill’s room is on the tenth floor and it’s a long ride there. Klaus has his tongue in Bill’s mouth, he’s got his hands down the back of Bill’s pants and he’s thumbing the crease of Bill’s ass. Bill is just leaning back, letting the tall, dark man devour him.

“Stop,” Bill says breathlessly. “I’m going to…”

Klaus grunts and pulls his hand out of Bill’s pants, and leans an arm on the wall over Bill. He stares at the younger boy, stroking his face. “You are prettier than her, you know.”

“I know.”

“Oh, you bitch,” Klaus says with a grin. “How long have you been planning on jumping me?”

The door dings open and Bill squeezes out from Klaus’s hold. “I wasn’t planning anything, I’m an innocent little kid,” Bill says, and darts out of the elevator. Klaus groans and runs after him.

He catches Bill at the door to their hotel room; Bill and Tom’s.

“We gotta be quick,” Bill says, sliding the keycard in. Klaus pushes up against Bill ass, his erection making Bill shiver. “Mmm, Klaus.”

“You’re so fucking hot,” Klaus growls. His hands slide down, holding Bill at the waist. “So tiny.”

“I’m nearly as tall as you,” Bill whines, shoving the door open. They tumble inside and Bill tugs Klaus over to the bed nearest the door.

“Fuck, are you sharing a room?” he asks.

Bill falls back on the bed and spreads his legs. “Yeah, with Tom. Now come here before he gets back.”

“Bill…” Klaus looks worried again, maybe spooked a little.

Bill licks at his lips, his tongue ring glinting in the low light of the room. “Come here.”

“But your brother and…”

Bill sits up, smirking at Klaus. “But nothing,” he says, pressing his hand against Klaus’s cock. “Please, pretty please?”

“Pretty please?” Klaus looks dumbfounded and hornier than ever. “God, what is it about you?”

“With a cherry on top?” Bill smiles sweetly and he’s got a handful of Klaus’s hard erection through his jeans.

Klaus groans loudly and crawls onto the bed, advancing toward Bill. Bill keeps his eyes on the man. He’s not feeling nervous anymore. He knows he can do this, he knows he wants this, and it’s very obvious that Klaus wants it, too.

He’s got Klaus right where he wants him.

“Go slow on me,” Bill says, feigning shyness. “I’m really nervous.”

“I’m really good.”

“Have you ever… with another guy before?” Bill asks, eyes wide.

Klaus hesitates and for a moment, Bill almost loses his hard-on. But then Klaus slowly shakes his head.

“Is that a problem?”

Bill exhales, smiling shakily. “No, no, no. I’m… glad. I hope I’m good enough for you.”

Klaus just lets out a low growl and pins Bill against the mattress. Bill cries out and grips Klaus’s strong shoulders, lets his head fall back and moans. Klaus is grinding his hips forcefully against his and it feels amazing, so much better than Andreas had felt. Klaus is a man, so much bigger than Bill. Bill’s cock is so hard in his pants and he arches up into Klaus.

“You ever feel someone touch you down there?” Klaus mumbles against Bill’s neck. “Did anyone ever get you off?”

“No,” Bill replies. “Show me.”

“God, I’m the first?” Klaus pulls back and strokes down Bill’s throat and chest.

“Yes,” Bill says, flushing, not with embarrassment but with arousal. He loves the way Klaus’s eyes are dark with hunger, how they’re roving over his body hotly. Klaus looks like he doesn’t know what to do first, like he doesn’t know what to touch or taste.

“Shit, Bill, I just want to…” He grabs Bill’s hips and flips him over. Bill moans, on his knees, his ass sticking up, and shakes as Klaus tugs his pants down. “I can’t go slow.”

Bill doesn’t really want Klaus to go slow, but he whines and grips the sheets. “Don’t… hurt me,” he says, grinning into the blankets. He wiggles his ass and Klaus has Bill’s pants and boxers off in a matter of seconds. Bill’s naked but for his slinky black shirt.

“I’ll be careful… I’ll be…” Klaus spreads Bill’s ass and groans.

“Oh…” Bill moans. “Klaus, don’t.”

“Don’t?”

Bill wiggles his ass just a bit. “Not yet.”

But Klaus presses a finger into Bill anyway and it’s amazing. Bill cries out in pain, real pain, but it’s so good.

“Noooo,” Bill whines. “Klaus.”

Klaus shoves his finger deep and Bill keens out in pleasure. Klaus is panting at Bill’s neck, already sweating, and curling his finger over and over.

His fingers are so long, so big, and Bill’s knees give out as he’s stroked just right. It’s the best feeling in the world, being touched like this, and Bill can’t believe he’s waited so long for another go at it.

“Oh, Klaus,” Bill moans. “More.”

“More?” Klaus breathes out.

“Not so hard.” Bill shuts his eyes and feels Klaus’s fingers brush right against the place inside him that just about makes him scream. “Oh! No, yes, harder. Mmm.”

Klaus grips Bill’s ass and adds another finger in Bill. Bill whimpers and tenses his muscles, giving Klaus a preview of just how tight he can really be.

“Fuck,” Klaus manages. “I’m gonna get in there.”

“Oh, my god,” Bill whines. “Too fast.”

Klaus chuckles softly. “You want it, you little asshole.”

Bill looks over his shoulder and tries to glare indignantly. “More,” he says, his tone petulant. “I can barely feel that.”

But then Bill cries out as Klaus thrusts his fingers hard, forcing Bill forward, gripping the sheets. Just Klaus’s fingers feel a thousand times better than Andreas’s cock had. Bill’s trembling and aching, he’s ready for a good fucking.

“I want it so bad,” Bill moans softly. “Klaus, do it to me.”

Klaus’s fingers exit Bill quickly and he grips Bill’s hips firmly. “You sure?”

“Mmm, yes. I’ve got some lube, just over there-”

“Thought you said this was your first,” Klaus interrupts.

“Oh, it is. It’s Tom’s, just over there. He’s a freak. Get it and take your pants off,” Bill says, sitting up and blowing some hair out of his face. “Now!”

Klaus gets off the bed, fumbling with his belt buckle as he crosses the room. When he comes back, he’s got his pants off, lube in hand, and he’s opening a condom wrapper. Bill draws back, brows furrowed.

“Don’t look so surprised,” Klaus says.

“Oh… Oh, yeah.” Bill swallows hard, staring at the condom. Of course they should use a condom; why wouldn’t they? Bill shakes the uncertainty off and crawls toward Klaus again. “Can I put that on you?” He kisses Klaus’s shoulder.

“Fuck, yeah.” Klaus grins. “I’ll teach you.”

Bill actually doesn’t know how to put one of them on, and why would he? When he’d done it with Andreas they hadn’t been thinking at all, just feeling. Bill wants to feel it all again.

He takes the condom and Klaus tugs off his shirt. Klaus is toned tight, his body makes Bill’s mouth water.

“Take off the boxers,” Bill demands.

“Pretty demanding for a virgin,” Klaus says, but he slips out of his boxers anyway. Bill just grins and stares at Klaus’s dick; it’s hard and wet and red.

“So big,” Bill breathes, scooting forward, dropping the condom to unbutton his shirt. He goes to shrug it off, but Klaus tips him back on the bed.

“Leave it on,” Klaus says. “It looks good on you.” He crawls over Bill, completely covering him with his body. “Put the condom on me.”

“I…” Bill groans, Klaus’s hot body is pushing him down into the mattress, he can feel his sizeable erection against his hip.

Klaus sits up, his cock jutting out. Bill wants to touch it, but even more, he wants it in him. His insides are aching, burning; he needs it.

He takes the condom and holds it awkwardly at the tip of Klaus’s cock, and he looks at the older man expectantly. “Like this?”

“Roll it on, you’ll feel it,” Klaus says softly. Bill slowly slides the condom onto Klaus’s dick, grazing the length with his knuckles. “Fuck, kid. Feels amazing.”

“Really?” Bill is entranced with Klaus’s dick. “How much sex do you and Serena have?”

Klaus almost chokes. “Enough.”

Bill’s eyebrows raise. “Mmm. Like this?”

The condom is secured on Klaus’s cock and the older man nods. “Good job… Now you wanna lube it up?”

Bill nods and reaches for the tube. He squirts some of the cool gel out and holds it in his palm, staring at Klaus’s dick. His hands slide over the hot length, making it slick and ready. “How’s that?”

“God, you’re hot,” Klaus breathes. “Come here, lie down on your back.”

Bill bites at his lip, kneeling up and smiling as shyly as he knows how. His shirt is spread open, exposing his lean, smooth body, his cock hard and pressed up against his belly. “No,” he says.

Klaus raises an eyebrow. “No?”

“Up against the headboard, on your ass,” Bill says. “I’m gonna sit on it.”

“But… I think it would be better for your first time if you…”

Bill shakes his head. “I wanna do it this way, my way. My way, Klaus.”

Klaus stares at Bill. “You’re really something.”

“I know.” Bill touches Klaus’s chest and pushes him back, right where he wants him. “It’ll be so – so good.” Klaus spreads his legs, invites Bill to his lap. “I just… sit on it?”

“You seem to know exactly what you want to do,” Klaus says with a wink.

Bill gives him a coy smile and straddles his hips. “Don’t move,” he says with pouting eyes. “I need to do this on my own time.”

Klaus nods, watching Bill’s every move. Bill finds Klaus’s hard cock with his hands and holds it steady as he lowers his ass down, feeling the tip brush the crease of his ass. He’s not exactly sure how easy the slide will be, but he’s ready for it. He spreads his thighs more, opening himself, arching his back and closing his eyes.

“Fuck, look at you,” Klaus mumbles. “You’re the… the hottest I’ve ever had.”

“You haven’t had me yet…” Bill feels Klaus’s dick brush his hole. “Mmm, but you’re about to.”

Klaus puts his hands on Bill’s hips and guides him slowly. “I’ll go gentle, okay?”

“N-no!” Bill glares at Klaus. “I mean, I’ll let you know. Just let me sit on it.”

“Don’t hurt yourself, because it’s gonna hurt,” Klaus says. “And it might take some time before it feels—”

Bill grins and forces himself down on Klaus’s dick. It hurts like hell at first, even more than when he’d done it with Andreas, but he’s already moaning, he’s already straining for release.

“Ahhh!” Bill cries out, shoving down until he’s completely seated in Klaus’s lap. He squirms, cries out again, and digs his nails deep into Klaus’s shoulders.

“Fuck, Bill, fuck,” Klaus groans. “Shit, don’t move… you’re so fucking tight. Are you okay? God!”

Bill grits his teeth and pulls halfway off Klaus’s dick, feeling a surge of power and arousal run through him. When he falls back into Klaus’s lap they’re both yelling. Klaus tries to thrust up, but Bill pulls off and forces himself back down again.

“Don’t,” Bill says, “move.”

“Bill,” Klaus croaks. “Bill, be careful, please, I—”

But Bill isn’t listening, he’s riding Klaus’s cock, trembling and shuddering in his lap. Klaus’s dick is just right, just big enough to hit all the good spots, and with it under Bill’s control, it’s perfect. Bill bounces in Klaus’s lap, riding him to his content.

“Sit still,” Bill moans. He rocks forward, tugging at Klaus’s shoulders, forcing him to slide down on his back. Bill shoves forward and feels the cock hit his spot, dead on. He wails out, biting at his lip as Klaus’s hands grip at his waist more securely.

“Kid, you’re… you’re fuckin’…” Klaus’s face is completely blissed out as Bill rides his dick. His hands are feeling up and down Bill’s slender torso, thumbs dragging down Bill’s hips and touching his cock.

Bill glances down and smirks a little. He knew he’d end up here and the pay off is better than he’d hoped. He doesn’t have much to compare to, but Klaus is an amazing fuck. Now he’s handling Bill’s dick in a way that’s driving Bill over the edge. Bill can hardly take it.

“Fuck, fuck,” Bill murmurs. “Klaus, that’s so good, mmm…”

Klaus tugs at Bill’s shirt tails, pulls him forward. Bill tumbles down and their lips press together. Bill’s eager to sit up and go back to riding Klaus’s dick but Klaus has his hands all over Bill’s back and he’s pushing his tongue into Bill’s mouth…

Bill wrinkles his nose and pulls back, smirking at Klaus. “Just fuck me,” he whispers.

“God, you’re cold, babe,” Klaus says, but he grins. His hips arch up, his cock pressing even deeper inside Bill.

It’s enough to have Bill bending back, bracing himself on Klaus’s thighs and riding out the hard, intense thrusts.

“Oh, oh, oh, yes,” Bill moans. “Yes, Klaus. Yes, that’s so…”

“God, it’s good, you’re so hot, so fuckin’ hot,” Klaus hisses. His hands smooth up and down Bill’s tiny waist, pulling Bill down onto his upward thrusts.

Bill’s lost a lot of the control now, but it’s too good. He lets Klaus fuck him, harder and harder until Klaus is sitting up, trying to topple Bill back. But Bill resists, shoving down so hard they both seize up, gasp, and come.

Bill lets out one long breath and pushes some of his hair off his forehead. It’s sweaty and his whole body is trembling; he hasn’t come this hard, ever. He glances at Klaus. The older man is on his back, breathing heavy and lightly gripping Bill’s thigh.

“Careful when I pull out,” Klaus warns softly.

Bill just sighs and slides off Klaus’s cock easily. Klaus groans and pulls at Bill, wraps his arms around his slender body. Bill fusses a bit but lets himself be held.

“You smell so sweet,” Klaus says. “God, you smell so good, Bill. Thank you for letting me… be your first.”

“Mm,” Bill murmurs, picking at one of his shirt tails. There’s come on it, he’ll have to wash it. “Thanks, yeah.”

“You were really good. Was I good for you?” Klaus strokes Bill’s curly hair. “You’ll remember it, right?”

“Oh, yeah.” Bill tries to squirm out of Klaus’s hold. He feels uncomfortable and he wants a shower. “Definitely.”

“I will,” Klaus replies. He kisses Bill’s face, squeezes his hip. “Your beautiful body, god. Never thought a guy could be so hot but you… You’re the hottest.”

“Thanks.”

“No, I mean it. You’re perfect,” Klaus says. “Does anyone ever tell you that?”

Bill fakes a yawn and rolls over, legs sprawled. “Not really. I think Tom will be back soon, so…”

“Just one second,” Klaus says. “This is special, right?”

“Um.” Bill sits up and touches Klaus’s shoulder gently. “Of course it’s special, it was my first. But… you have a girlfriend.”

“Bill, you’re so much more—”

“Listen, Tom is gonna be back soon and he’ll freak out if he finds me naked in here with you,” Bill says. “We can talk about this later. Okay?”

Klaus frowns and Bill’s already reaching down, finding Klaus’s pants and shirt. He hands them over and smiles as sweetly as he can. Whatever it takes to get Klaus out. He doesn’t really care if Tom walks in, he trusts his brother with anything, but the way Klaus is acting, treating him, is freaking Bill out.

Bill just wanted sex out of this, as cold and callous as it may be. He wanted Klaus because he’s straight, because he shouldn’t have him.

Now Klaus is acting all loving and gentle and sweet. He’s acting like he and Bill have a long future together and Bill’s just put off.

“Can I get your number?” Klaus asks as he zips up his pants. “I’d love to call you, maybe say good night later…”

Bill wrinkles his nose distastefully. “I’ll just see you tomorrow, I’m really tired.”

Klaus grins. “Kid, you’re… amazing.” He bends over and scrawls something on the hotel stationary. “There’s my number. Call me, okay?”

“Yup.”

Bill’s on the bed, splayed out shamelessly, and he’s feeling anxious. He needs to get this guy out of his room, but Klaus is taking so long. Klaus slowly buckles his belt and then turns to the mirror, checking his hair.

“You look great,” Bill says sweetly. “So hot, Klaus.”

Klaus turns around and gives Bill a dazzling smile. “You’d know. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

He leans in to Bill and Bill turns his head, offering his cheek. Klaus chuckles and grabs Bill’s face, kissing him square on the lips. Bill gasps and pushes the older man away, scowling.

“Good night,” Bill says pointedly.

Klaus nods and leaves out the door, shutting it behind him.

Bill lets out a long sigh and falls backwards, groaning. It was just like last time, with Andreas. Why did these guys have to ruin sex by becoming… clingy?

He’s about to reach over and pull his boxers on when the door clicks open and Tom comes in, looking disgruntled.

“What the hell was Klaus so happy about?” he grumbles, throwing his wallet on the dresser. He glances up at Bill and makes a face, groaning loudly. “Aw, Bill, what the fuck? Put some clothes on!!”

Bill picks at his black button down shirt, his only piece of clothing, and frowns. “Sorry.” He tugs down the shirt so that his groin is covered and buttons it to his chest.

“Bill!” Tom says, laughing. “Pants!”

“But it’ll chafe,” Bill says, lounging back and grinning. His thighs are exposed and Tom rolls his eyes.

“Did you seriously just fuck that guy? He has a girlfriend, you know,” Tom says. He sits beside Bill on the bed, maybe a strange thing to do because Bill’s half naked and smelling of sex, but they’ve always been this way.

Tom’s always told Bill about what he gets up to, which isn’t nearly as much as his bravado suggests, so Bill feels comfortable in most things with his brother.

“Him having a girlfriend is why we fucked,” Bill says.

“Oh god, your stupid straight guy fetish?”

“Is it that obvious that I have a thing for straight guys?” Bill asks.

Tom bumps Bill in the shoulder and loops an arm around him. “So, got laid, huh? Better luck than I had.”

“It was so fucking good until he started talking,” Bill says wistfully. “Why can’t all straight guys be… straight?”

Tom can only laugh and squeeze Bill. “Like I said, you got luckier than me.”

“You never get lucky, Tomi,” Bill says. Tom squeezes Bill until he squeals. “But it’s true, you’ve only fucked like… two girls.”

“I’ve done a lot more than just fucking, though!” Tom defends. Bill wiggles out of Tom’s hold, nearly exposing himself and grabbing at Tom’s hand. “What are you doing?”

Bill grins. “Oh, I forgot, you once got a blowjob. And to think, for like a year of my life I thought you were a sex maniac. Psh!” Before Tom can defend himself again Bill tugs his hand forward and brings Tom’s fingers up to his face.

“Bill…?”

Bill takes a long sniff and falls back to the bed, giggling his head off.

“Ew, Bill!”

“What did you do, Tomi!” Bill squeals. “Put your whole hand up her?”

“Jesus.” Tom stares down at his legs, blushing redder than Bill’s ever seen. “I… some girl let me finger her in the bathroom.”

Bill shrieks with laughter.

“It’s not funny, it was hot!” Tom cries. “She was like… begging for it, but I didn’t just want to fuck some girl I barely knew.”

Bill sits up, his shirt falling open obscenely. Tom gapes at him and Bill cuddles up close. “Tell me more.”

Tom just rolls his eyes and shrugs. “It was that girl you told me about, so I actually went over to talk to her.”

Bill nods, grinning. It doesn’t matter that Tom’s his brother; the fact that there’s a straight guy talking about doing very straight things is enough. Bill flops onto his belly and listens to Tom’s tale, wide eyed, enthralled.

Straight guy fetish indeed.

**

“Hey.”

Bill looks up from the set list he’s looking over. Klaus is standing there, flushed and bumbling.

“Hi,” Bill murmurs. “What’s up?”

“I did it.”

“Did what?”

“I want to be with you.”

Bill groans softly. “What’d you do?”

Klaus bites at his lip and leans in closer. “Broke up with Serena. Bill, this is it. Last night was… God, it made me feel so much, I had no idea. I like you. You’re… incredible.”

“Oh, my god,” Bill moans. “Klaus, no…”

“Isn’t this great?” Klaus asks. “Now we can… continue this.”

“I’m only fifteen!”

“Age doesn’t matter when it’s special, baby.”

“We fucked, that’s all,” Bill says, hardly able to look at Klaus.

“Bill,” Klaus says, frowning. “I was your first… I was your first time, I made you feel so good, and you made me feel so good. It was so special, it-”

“It wasn’t special,” Bill groans. “It wasn’t, I can’t believe you fell for that! Klaus, you… I can’t believe you dumped someone for me. For a fuck! That’s all I wanted. Just… a fuck. Your dick.”

Klaus looks around, his cheeks turning red. “What?”

“We’ll talk about this later,” Bill says, turning away from the older man and stomping to the other side of the arena. He doesn’t turn around, doesn’t look to see if Klaus is following him. He just marches straight over to where his manager, David Jost, is standing, going over some papers.

“Hey, Bill,” David says, not looking up. “What’s going on?”

“I’m having a weird problem,” Bill says quietly. “See that guy over there? The lighting guy? His name is Kris or something…”

“Klaus. What about him?”

“He’s making me feel so uncomfortable,” Bill replies, trying to look uneasy. “I don’t know if… I don’t know if I can perform, knowing he’s… um…”

“What does he do?” Now David’s looking at Bill, he’s looking concerned.

“He just… It’s just the way he looks at me, some of the things he says. It’s no big deal, I just feel really gross when he’s around.”

David starts to look angry. “Of course. I’ll make some calls, have Saki talk to him. He’ll be gone by the end of the day, alright?”

“Are you sure?” Bill asks innocently.

“Sure. We can replace lighting guys, but we can’t replace you. Consider it done, Bill. I’m sorry he’s such a creep.” David pulls put his cell phone and starts dialing a number. Bill mumbles a thanks and starts to walk away.

All for a fuck.

Don't Tell Mom 14/14

Sun, 13 Apr 2008 22:56:04 GMT

Title: Don't Tell Mom (14/14) *COMPLETE*
Previous Chapters: Here
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17 <
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: What Mom doesn't know won't kill her.

It was cold outside, and there was light snow falling. Bill could just barely see the snow outside the foggy window. He was at their recording studio in Magdeburg, working with David. They were going over the new lyrics for their first all-English album.

“Your pronunciation still needs some work,” David said. “But I think you’re going to be fine.”

Bill sighed, putting a hand on the side of his earphone. “It’s my fucking ‘r’s. I can’t pronounce them, it’s so stupid.”

“You’ll get used to it.” David checked his watch, and frowned. “Shit, I gotta meet my girlfriend… We’re done here. Good work.”

“I’m gonna hang back and practice,” Bill mumbled, still staring at the sheet music in front of him. “Have a good night.”

“I plan to. See you later. Oh!” David grinned. “I won’t see you later. You’re off to the Maldives in a few days. I’ll be seeing you there in a couple of weeks.”

“Oh, yeah,” Bill said, feeling warmth fill his belly. “God. I need this fucking vacation.”

“You’ve earned it.” David glanced at his watch again. “I’m late. Have a good holiday.”

“Yeah,” Bill murmured, zoning out to his music again. He stared at the words, sounding them out in his head before opening his mouth and singing the lyrics out, closing his eyes. His voice resonated in the small room and he got chills, as he often did when working in the recording studio. He felt at home, like he’d never left.

He heard an irritating tapping on the glass, and looked over. There was his brother, grinning and holding up his guitar. He mouthed something, and Bill frowned and squinted. “What?” he shouted, and then winced. It all boomed back in his ears.

Tom flipped a switch, allowing the intercom to work both ways, and he smiled again. “You’re working hard in there.”

Bill rolled his eyes. “Get in here. I need some music.”

Tom let himself into the booth, his guitar strapped around his back, and shut the door behind him. "Can’t do it without me, huh?"

"Oh fuck off," Bill said, grinning. He adjusted the headphones and stuck his tongue out at Tom. Tom grinned back, leaning forward and capturing Bill’s tongue between his lips. "Mmph!"

Tom sucked the tongue into his own mouth and kissed Bill soundly. Bill moaned into the kiss, his hands slipping back to Tom’s guitar strap and snapping it hard against his neck. Tom laughed and pulled back.

"You’re in a playful mood," Tom said, eyes already dark with arousal. "Do you want to work on this or…"

"Go back to our room?" Bill asked. Tom rubbed his hands together, advancing on Bill. "Tomi, I’ve gotta practice. We can’t."

"Mmm, I’ve gotta do some practice, too," Tom said, his voice low. He kissed Bill’s jaw, letting his lips wander down Bill’s neck to his ear, sucking the lobe into his mouth. Bill melted into Tom, loving the attention his brother paid to him.

"Tomi, you don’t need any practice at this," Bill sighed out. "Tomi…"

Tom smiled against Bill’s skin and started to move down, kissing Bill’s neck, and then sucking on his collarbone. He looked up and Bill’s eyes were closed, and he looked so pretty with his curled eyelashes and those too-large headphones on. Tom’s cock ached as he traveled down even more, gripping Bill’s hips.

“Quick, I need it, it hurts,” Bill whispered. “Lick it.”

“Where?”

“Mm… I don’t care…” Bill squirmed and jutted his hips forward, nudging Tom’s chin. Tom groaned and pushed his guitar back, and fell to his knees. “Ooh, Tom… Ooh…”

Tom nodded, and spun Bill around. “Put your hands on the glass,” he said lowly. “Brace yourself.”

“What?” Bill looked down over his shoulder, a blush in his cheeks. “You’re gonna… You’re gonna?”

“Mm.” Tom slipped his fingers in Bill’s jeans and tugged them, finding that they shimmied past his hips without even unbuckling his belt. He then slid Bill’s little shorts down, too, and was faced with Bill’s ass.

Tom licked his lips and leaned forward, inhaling the musky, fresh scent.

“Oh, my god,” Bill moaned softly, bowing his head down and letting his hair fall over his face. His palms were flat on the strong glass and he parted his legs, pushing his ass back for Tom.

It occurred to Bill, just before Tom’s lips brushed behind his balls, that this might have been one of the sexiest moments of his life. Tom was kneeling behind him, his guitar strapped to his back, and they were about to do it in the recording studio.

It was the stuff porn was made of, and Bill’s knees shook.

Tom licked up Bill’s ass once, his tongue sliding across Bill’s entrance quickly.

"More," Bill whined out.

Tom licked down just as quickly, teasing Bill with the quick little laps. "You need to practice your songs," Tom said. He gave Bill’s hole one firm, long stroke with his tongue and then started kissing down the back of Bill’s thigh.

"Tomi, c’mon, please."

"I wanna hear you sing," Tom said. "I wanna hear… Monsoon. And I wanna hear hard r’s."

Bill shivered, bracing himself against the glass, and pressed his ass back. "I’m not singing."

"Well…" Tom pushed Bill’s pants down to his ankles. "Then I’ll find other things to kiss." He nibbled down Bill’s leg, kissing behind his knees.

"Tomi!" Bill let his nose push against the glass and he sighed. "Ugh. Fine." His cheeks burned hot with embarrassment, arousal, and annoyance, but he found himself singing anyway. "I’m staring at a broken door…"

Tom licked up Bill’s thigh, his tongue caressing just the bottom of his ass.
"There’s… uh, nothing left here anymore," Bill breathed out. He was more speaking the lyrics than singing them, and he took Tom’s rough bite on his left cheek to mean he should try a little harder.

“The room is cold… Oh, god… The room is cold, it’s making… Fuck, you’re making me insane, Tom,” Bill mewled.

Tom pulled back. “I don’t think that’s how the song goes…”

He pressed his face back into Bill’s ass and Bill squeaked. “I’ve been waiting here… Tom, I can’t… so long… Another moment seems to’ve… Oh fuck, make me come, please…”

“Finish the song.”

“Finish me,” Bill demanded, pushing his ass back into Tom’s face and hearing Tom growl into it.

"I wanna hear you sing," Tom said.

Bill looked over his shoulder and gave Tom a heated look. "Are you kidding me? You always make me sing. You just have to fucking touch me."

Tom stared back at Bill for a moment and then ducked his head and licked slowly right up Bill’s crease. It was what Bill had been hoping for and he nearly screamed as Tom’s tongue found his hole again, and this time it didn’t stray, it pressed against him and then inside.

"Yes," Bill hissed. "Oh, yes, Tomi."

Tom’s tongue worked in deeper and Bill felt the ache begin to build just as deeply in his belly. There was nothing like Tom licking him there, nothing like it in the world. The only thing he enjoyed more was Tom’s cock in his ass.

"Shit, fuck me," Bill said suddenly.

“Hmm?” Tom reached around and grabbed Bill’s cock, started pumping it steadily. “Like that?”

“Oh… my god.” Bill closed his eyes and tensed his fingers painfully. He was seeing stars, that was how good Tom was handling him, but he wasn’t surprised. Tom always made him see galaxies.

“Sing,” Tom said in a casual tone, and it drove Bill wild. His balls felt so tight and as he thought about the situation, really thought about it, he couldn’t believe it.

He took a deep breath. “Running through… Durch den…”

Tom squeezed Bill’s cock hard and Bill yelped. “God, sorry… Sorry… Through the monsoon, beyond the… um… world… Oh my god, Tom, right there. Right fucking there.”

Tom was fisting Bill’s dick and pressing his tongue so deep inside his ass that Bill’s knees were nearly buckling. He didn’t know how he was still standing, but he knew he had to keep it up.

"To the end of…" Bill’s eyes widened. His belly was so hot and he just wanted to be fucked. "Oh, Jesus. Tom…"

Tom moved his mouth back and Bill let out a frustrated sob. "To the end of?" Tom asked and pressed his tongue back into Bill’s eager ass.

Bill shouted, his stomach flipping violently. "Time!" he groaned, and came hard. His come shot up, hitting the window and his arms. "Fuck… fuck…"

He wanted to slump down, collapse onto the floor, but Tom held him up. He could feel his brother getting to his feet behind him, and suddenly there was a hot cock bumping his ass.

"Oh, god," Bill moaned.

Tom’s dick bumped his hole and nudged against it. "Bill, I’m gonna…"

"Yes…"

Tom pressed forward, just about to slip into Bill when there was a loud rapping on the door. Bill looked up and yelped, seeing Gustav on the other side of the window. Luckily, Gustav was to the side and could likely only see them from the chest up, but Bill was still mortified and shoved Tom off him. He quickly rubbed his forearm against the glass, wiping off any evidence of his orgasm.

"You guys!" Gustav yelled, his voice ringing clear through the intercom. It was then that Tom realized he’d left the damn thing on. Both twins reddened, tugging up their clothes frantically. "You know that thing’s on, right? Jesus, you’re like… fucking rabbits or something."

“Christ,” Tom groaned, buckling his belt and adjusting his guitar. “Fuck, I’m so hard.”

“I can still hear you,” came Gustav’s annoyed voice.

“Shut up!” Bill snapped, smoothing his hair and pulling his shirt down. He pushed himself away from Tom and squirmed a bit, feeling uncomfortable. The front of his jeans was damp and it didn’t feel good against his tightening groin. “Oh god.”

“What do you want?” Tom asked irritably.

“I just… Is everyone decent in there?” Gustav boomed through the intercom.

“Yes,” Bill said softly, mortified.

The door barged open and Gustav came in, looking disgruntled. “Jesus, never fucking again. I’m just letting you guys deal with it next time.”

Bill couldn’t even look up, and Tom sighed. “What?”

“I came down to tell you,” Gustav said despondently, “that Dave is on his way back and wanted to go over one more thing with Bill. But it kind of seems like Bill is busy, so if you want me to call him back…”

“Fuck off,” Bill grumbled.

“Alright, alright.” Gustav looked like he wanted to hang himself, but there was a trace of a smirk on his face. “Maybe, um… don’t have your twin time where everyone else can step in it.”

"Oh god," Bill groaned. "We didn’t mean to."

"Well," Gustav said, turning his nose up, and grabbing at the door. "Ew." And with that he shut the door, flicked off the intercom, and disappeared.

"We have really good friends," Bill said, still flushing red.

"Friend," Tom corrected. "Georg would probably quit the band if he walked into that. God, why are we so stupid?"

"That’s simple," Bill said. "You’re too fucking hot."

Tom managed a smile. "I am, aren’t I?"

They both smiled then and were about to make the same mistake they’d made earlier (involving tongues), when David barged in.

"God, we need some restraint," Bill muttered and they exchanged heated looks.

**

“Maybe it’s too much.”

Tom looked up from his Gibson. He and Bill were in the green room before their first show on the new tour, and the nerves were high. Bill was standing in front of Tom, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt.

“I don’t know,” Tom replied, tightening one of the guitar strings. “We fought so hard to get it on the playlist, and it seems like the fans want it, too.”

Bill sat down next to Tom. “You know, I’m not even nervous about the show. It’s just that one song. What if I mess it up?”

“You won’t, that’s like… the one thing I’m not worried about,” Tom said, smiling and rubbing Bill’s shoulder. “You should worry about actual stuff, like falling off the stage or getting knocked out by a falling light or getting mauled by girls.”

“No,” Bill groaned, burying his face in his hands. There was so much running through his head. It was the first night of their new tour but also, the first time the twins would break away from the rest of the band and perform a special song by themselves.

They were both nervous, and it wasn’t just stage fright.

“I can’t help but look like I’m completely in love with you when I sing that song,” Bill murmured, lowering his voice so that only his brother could hear.

Tom wrinkled his nose and ducked his head bashfully. “So… we won’t look at each other. It’ll be easy, you know? I’ll be concentrating on not fucking up the chord changes, anyway.”

Bill frowned, the answer didn’t quite please him. “Okay, I guess. Yeah, alright. I’ll be singing it to the audience, anyway.”

Now Tom frowned. That answer didn’t quite please him. “Of course.”

Bill gave him a small smile and leaned down and squeezed his hand. "Okay. Okay. It’ll be…"

"Okay," Tom said.

Bill nodded and the door to the green room opened. It was Saki. "We’re ready."

They boys got up and followed Saki backstage, meeting up with Georg and Gustav. They all tried to calm their nerves by doing their own things. Gustav still had his headphones on, rocking his head to whatever Metallica song he had playing. Georg was shaking his arms out and taking deep breaths.

The twins stood close together, not looking at each other.

But Bill’s fingers held tight to the bottom of Tom’s long shirt, curling into the fabric.

**

After the show, everyone high on the adrenaline of an amazing performance, the band let loose at a local club and got themselves good and drunk. It was becoming tradition to get plastered after the best of shows, and though Bill had something weighing on his mind, he was still having a blast sitting back in the VIP booths and watching Georg drink himself into oblivion.

Bill sat next to Tom, keeping enough space between them, but flushing at how their fingers interlocked beneath the table.

"Tomi," he said lowly, squeezing his brother’s hand.

Tom looked up from his beer. "Hm?"

"You didn’t look at me at all during In Die Nacht," Bill said, the smallest of pouts on his lips.

Tom watched Georg down another drink. He couldn’t believe how much he could take and wondered if he would get another. “I know, that was the plan. Told you we could do it.”

“But…” Bill squeezed Tom’s fingers. “I stared at you the whole time.”

“Bill…”

“I did, I couldn’t help it. Those words are for you, Tom. I couldn’t sing it to the audience because it isn’t for them.” Bill frowned.

“Play it down,” Tom mumbled.

“I don’t care,” Bill replied. “I’m going to keep singing it at you and next time, if you don’t even look at me…”

Tom raised his eyebrows.

“I’ll kick you,” Bill said. “Hard, in the shin.”

“Don’t,” Tom protested.

“I won’t, if you’ll just let me sing our song to you.”

Tom’s lips curled into a tiny smile and Bill scooted closer. “Okay.”

**

The rest of the tour went smoothly, and soon the band found themselves with some time off, some time to hide out and reinvent. They were enjoying more success than ever before, and it seemed it wasn’t going to stop anytime soon.

The twins were turning eighteen shortly, something they’d been waiting for. They’d be able to do so much more, answer to fewer people, gain some freedom.

“Freedom,” Bill said one evening while he and Tom were sitting around the apartment above the studio.

“Huh?” Tom was finishing off a round of a new video game Georg had left at the place.

“What do you think?”

Tom glanced up, just for a moment so that the car he was racing wouldn’t crash. “Of what?”

Bill put down a notebook he’d been scrawling in and crawled over to Tom, extending his forearm. “My next tattoo.”

“You have too many.”

Bill shoved Tom. “I do not.”

“Why would you ink up your body?” Tom frowned, though he wasn’t really that upset. Bill’s tattoos turned him on more than most things.

“It’s not my whole body, it’s just my forearm. Right here,” Bill said, pointing. “I want to get ‘Freedom’ written on it. Sort of a birthday present to myself.”

“Freedom?”

“Yeah.” Bill nodded. “I think it represents me… and you. We’ll finally be free.”

“Bill,” Tom said, sighing and dropping the game controller. “We’re never going to be free.”

Bill’s eyes narrowed at the words. "Jesus, Tom, don’t be so negative. Everything’s going so well and…" Bill looked away, his lips down turned.

"I didn’t mean to piss you off," Tom said, scooting close. He touched Bill’s forearm, let his fingers trace where the tattoo would be. "I’m sorry."

Bill tugged his arm away. "It’s fine… I don’t even want it anymore."

"Bill…"

"And I really wanted it before.”

Tom scowled. "That’s dumb, Bill. Don’t change your mind because of something I said."

Bill huffed and pulled back even further. Tom wasn’t sure what’d gotten into Bill, and hell, even Bill wasn’t sure why he was in such a mood. He’d been so excited about the tattoo and had expected Tom to be, too.

"Well, sorry if what you say means something to me," Bill snapped.

Tom rolled his eyes. "I care about what you say, too, but you have to be your own person. Like, I’m wearing what I want to our party."

That was a sore subject and as Bill’s eyes narrowed even further, Tom wished he hadn’t brought it up at all.

"That isn’t fair," Bill said petulantly. "You can’t just wear a suit for one night?"

"I’m not wearing the fucking suit," Tom said, his face suddenly hot. Bill could rile him up (in so many ways), so easily. "When was the last time you saw me wear one? I didn’t even wear one to graduation! The last time… Dad made me wear one when I was like… five."

“I’m not fucking making you,” Bill replied edgily, gritting his teeth. “You can do what you want. I was just asking because it, I don’t know, it meant something to me. Everyone is going to be dressed up. If you want to be the only asshole there… Fuck, even Gustav will be wearing a suit.”

“Gustav can wear a suit,” Tom said testily. “I’m not.”

“That’s typical.” Bill rolled his eyes and stalked away from Tom. “You know what? You don’t even have to come with me to see the place for our party tomorrow. Actually, you don’t even have to come to the fucking party.”

“Alright, I’ll do that,” Tom replied sarcastically. “You call the shots.”

“Fuck you,” Bill spat, folding his arms.

“Go fuck yourself,” Tom said, turning back to the video game. “And while you’re at it, get ‘freedom’ written all over your body and put a suit on with Gustav.”

Bill just stomped his foot and left the room, flipping Tom off.

Tom ground his teeth and hunched his shoulders over. Suddenly the apartment seemed really small and already he was dreading sleeping alone that night.

**

The twins followed a man in a suit through a hallway silently. They’d had the appointment to see the venue for their birthday party for over a month and though they weren’t speaking to each other, they knew they couldn’t miss it.

“In here is the bar,” the man said, bringing the twins into a bigger room. “It will be an open bar, for a flat fee we’ll cover in your contract. Your guests will be free to come and go out of here, and then into the party room with a dance floor. Just over here.”

Bill strode ahead of Tom and walked beside the man. Tom rolled his eyes and looked around. He had to admit the place was pretty nice. Bill had an eye for style.

“Your party will have a theme?” the man asked.

“Yeah, we’re all wearing suits,” Tom couldn’t help saying.

Bill groaned. “It’s Casino Night.”

“Ah,” the man replied, politely ignoring the tension between the twins. “Well, we do have a dress code, but that can be overridden for a private party.”

“That won’t be necessary,” Bill said sweetly. Tom held his tongue.

“So, what do you think?” the man asked the twins. “I can go get the paperwork and we can start the rental process.”

"Well, we're waiting for someone else," Bill said, glancing at his brother. "Our mother is supposed to meet us here."

"But, the place is great," Tom said. "I'm sure we can start the process."

Bill shook his head. "No, no, we need to wait. We promised she could check it out before we-"

"It's our money, and I say we do it," Tom said. "And I think we should make exceptions to the dress code." He said this to the man, who was by now looking extremely uneasy.

"Well," the man said, clearing his throat. "How about you two look around a little more and I'll get the paper work, just in case. And you can wait for your mother?"

He walked away quickly, and the twins could tell he couldn’t get away fast enough. Bill sighed and folded his arms, and glared at his brother.

“What?” Tom said. “It is our money.”

“She’s our mom.”

“You never cared what she thought before,” Tom replied, wrinkling his nose. “And I’m not wearing a suit.”

“Fine,” Bill said loudly, turning around and stomping away. “I have to go check out the bathrooms.”

Tom watched his twin stalk away and he felt anger rise in his belly. Their fight was stupid and it had been going on too long. Normally they‘d have kissed and made up after an hour. But they hadn’t been talking for over a day, and Bill was so stubborn about things. Tom sighed loudly and walked after Bill. He thought about compromising - maybe he could wear a suit, just a casual one. The thought made him almost ill, suits were so uncomfortable and formal and itchy and…

He pushed through the swinging bathroom door and saw Bill standing in front of the mirror, pouting.

“Are they to your liking?” Tom couldn’t help saying. “The bathrooms.”

“They’re fine.”

“Come on, Bill.”

Bill stared at Tom in the mirror, shoulders tense. “You think I’m such an idiot, I get it.”

“No…” Tom trailed off. “We just… We’re different. You want suits and I just want to book this place.”

"Why is the suit such a big fucking deal?" Bill asked. He put his hand against the mirror, palm down, and curled it into a fist. "You make me so angry!"

Tom shook his head, coming up close behind Bill. "Bill…" He stroked down Bill's back, he was sick of fighting, and so close to their birthday, too.

"Don't try being sweet to me just so I'll shut up," Bill said. He spun around and knocked Tom's hand away. "I want you on my side."

"I am on your side, I'm always on your side," Tom said. He reached out to Bill again and this time Bill didn't push him away. "Baby…" He held Bill's cheek.

"Then wear the suit and don't make fun of my tattoo," Bill said with an exaggerated pout.

"Bill, I was being stupid about the tattoo," Tom said

"You're always being stupid." Bill's lips curled up in the smallest of smiles. "This is a dumb fight, isn't it?”

"One of the stupider ones," Tom agreed. He kissed Bill's chin softly, holding his face. "Don't you like the place?"

"It was perfect," Bill said. He leaned into Tom's hand.

"Was?"

"Now it's all…" Bill smiled. "We fought in it."

"But we've made up," Tom said. He tipped Bill's head up and kissed his lips.

"Have we?" Bill asked. His voice was breathless, needy.

Tom nodded. “I’m sorry.”

“Me, too,” Bill replied softly. “Even though you were being an asshole.”

“Bill,” Tom groaned.

“Okay, okay,” Bill said, laughing a little and wrapping his arms around Tom’s waist. “Maybe I won’t wear a suit, either.”

“Yeah, right.”

Bill smiled against Tom’s lips. “Fuck me.”

Tom raised his eyebrows and pulled back. “What??”

“This can’t be the place we fought in, it has to be the place we fucked in.”

Tom groaned again and Bill pressed a leg between his thighs, and ground into Tom.

“Come on, I can tell you want it,” Bill whispered. “It’s been so long.”

“Like a whole day.”

“Yeah, give me it,” Bill sighed, pressing his own growing erection against Tom. “It aches, Tomi.”

"We can't," Tom said. "Bill, what if Mom-"

"She can't come in the boy's bathroom, Tomi," Bill said, rolling his eyes. "Besides, we've been so good."

"Have not," Tom said, but he was already backing up, tugging Bill with him. He found one of the stalls and pulled Bill in. "We're always bad."

"You're bad," Bill said, and Tom shoved him back against the stall door. "And I'm just helpless under you."

Tom grunted at the words and locked the little door. "Bill, Jesus." He kissed Bill's throat, stroked his sides, and moaned. "Jesus."

Their lips met and their hands joined. They were very bad boys.

**

Simone walked into the club briskly, glancing at her watch and huffing. Traffic had been awful and she was late. She hated being late.

And she hadn't seen her sons in months. She felt nervous, but even more, she felt stupid for feeling nervous. They were her boys, no matter what they got up to.

“Good afternoon,” said a gentleman standing behind a podium, making notes. “Can I help you, ma’am?”

Simone cringed; she hated being called ‘ma’am’. “Yes, my sons should be here…”

“Oh, you’re Mrs. Kaulitz,” the man said, smiling.

Simone bristled again. “Yes,” she said through gritted teeth, not bothering to correct the man. “Where are the boys?”

“Oh, they… They were having something of an argument,” he replied, frowning. “I left them alone. I saw them go into the bathrooms, though. Just over there.”

“Really,” Simone said blankly. Her stomach swirled and she sighed, closing her eyes momentarily. It meant nothing; the boys were always fighting, and just because they went into the bathroom together didn’t mean… anything. “Well-”

“But they’ve been in there for about twenty minutes, maybe I didn’t see them come out,” the man went on.

Simone pursed her lips. “Thank you, sir. I’ll wait over here for them.”

“What do you think of the place?” the man asked.

“Beautiful,” Simone said quickly. She was just about to go sit down when the twins stumbled out of the bathroom, laughing and poking and shoving each other. Simone raised her eyebrows. Bill’s face was flushed red, his hair was tousled, and Tom looked… smug.

“Mom!” Bill cried, breaking away from his brother and running to give Simone a hug.

Simone let herself be enveloped by Bill and she hugged him back, trying not to notice how sweaty he felt.

“Hi, baby,” Simone said softly, pulling back and looking at her son. She looked over Bill’s shoulder and saw Tom. The expression on Tom’s face reminded Simone vaguely of the same look he’d given her when they were little boys and she would go out for the evening, leaving them with a babysitter.

The look on Tom’s face said “mine”, and Simone let go of Bill.

“Hi, Tom,” Simone greeted her other son. “Give me a hug, will you?”

Tom finally gave a tiny smile as he hugged his mother. “You look good, Mom.”

"So do you boys," she said, slightly disapproving. Bill blushed a little at the look she gave him and Simone wanted to say something, do something.

But what could she say that she hadn't already said? What could she do? They were about to be adults, she didn't control them anymore, never had, really.

So, Simone sucked it up and kept her mouth shut.

"Let's see this place," she said.

Bill squealed in excitement and grabbed her arm, dragging her through the club while Tom followed slowly behind, shaking his head.

**

Tom almost fell up the stairs, but Bill grabbed him around the waist and steadied them both.

Only for a moment, of course, and then they both tumbled forward, laughing hysterically. "Bill! Off me, you cow," Tom snorted and Bill squashed him even more.

"I wanna be on top," Bill giggled into Tom's ear. For whatever reason, they'd chosen the stairwell instead of the elevator, and being as drunk as they were, freshly turned eighteen and coming home from their party, they were in no condition to make it very far up the steps.

"No way," Tom said. He rolled Bill off him and they both laughed. "You really wanna be on top?"

Bill made a face and tried standing. "I can't even see straight," he said. "C'mon, wanna go to bed!"

“Sshh.” Tom wrapped an arm around Bill’s neck and Bill yelped as they reached their floor. “’sides, I got you something.”

“Hmm?” Bill blinked, climbing the last step and balancing himself. “Oh… Oh, okay. We’re here. What’d you get me?”

“Come find out.” Tom grabbed Bill’s hand and they pushed through the heavy door to their hotel floor. “Mmm, you smell like…”

“Beer. Wine. Drinks.” Bill grinned. “Fuck, so drunk… so drunk…”

“Which room?” Tom mumbled.

“Three… Forty… That one,” Bill said. He pointed at a door and knocked on it.

“No,” Tom hissed, pulling Bill away. “Not that one.”

Bill knocked again before Tom pulled him down the hall. They had the last room on the floor, a big room, a suite. Tom had requested it special, letting everyone think he’d be entertaining someone in it that night.

And he would be. He dug the keycard out of his jeans and held it up, squinting. “Shit.”

“Bed,” Bill whispered.

Tom nodded. “Alright… Yeah.” He slid the keycard in the door and they tumbled in, laughing and grasping each other. When the door was shut, Tom pinned Bill to the wall and kissed him so hard they nearly lost their breath.

“Fuck,” Bill breathed, eyes wide open. He grabbed at Tom’s shoulders, pulling him. “Do that again.”

Tom grinned lopsidedly. “I’m gonna get you out of that suit.”

Bill’s face lit up, and they both looked down at Bill’s shiny, striped suit. “I’ve got something even better under it,” Bill said lamely.

“Oh, hang on.” Tom stumbled a bit, guiding Bill further into the room. When they got to the main bedroom, they saw a lavish king-size bed, two bottles of wine, and Tom’s acoustic guitar, resting on top of the duvet. “I gotta… I got a present for you,” he mumbled, cheeks flushed.

“I know.” Bill started to shove his suit jacket off, but Tom stopped him.

“No, I really do.”

“Me, too.”

“No, I really do,” Tom insisted, sitting Bill down on the bed. “I’m gonna play this thing for you.”

"What?" Bill suddenly looked interested, his eyes focusing seriously on his brother.

"I…" Tom looked down. "I wrote you something."

Bill's face lit up and he clapped a hand over his mouth. "Tomi! That's so… so…"

"Lame?" Tom was flushed. "I don't have to, it's stupid and I-"

Bill was off the bed in half a second, grabbing Tom and kissing him sloppily on the mouth. "Oh, Tomi, that's so romantic."

Tom shook just a little in Bill's hold; he wasn't very good at this sort of stuff. He didn't know what to say or what to do exactly. But Bill seemed excited, he wasn't laughing at him, at least not yet.

"Play it for me," Bill said, dragging Tom down to the bed. "Play me my song. No one's ever written me a song before."

"And you've written me loads of songs." Tom ducked his head and scratched behind his ear bashfully. "It's really nothing, I just… I hope you like it." He picked up his guitar, his fingers slow and lazy as he plucked a few notes out. Bill made a face and Tom grinned. "May be too drunk?"

"Play it anyway, you're so good," Bill cooed. He scooted close and stroked Tom's fingers on the strings. "Are there words?"

Tom shook his head. The song was something he'd been secretly working on for months, and if he wasn't so drunk he'd be disappointed that he was going to fuck it up so royally. His fingers wouldn't cooperate and as he began to play he could hear the sour notes ringing out.

He was proud of the song and had actually wanted to play it for Bill before the party, but time had run short and things had come up. And now they were drunk off their asses and Tom was massacring the song.

But Bill didn't seem to notice. He was kneeling before Tom, eyes wide and glistening. He looked like he might cry. Tom loved him all the more then, so obviously enthralled with something just because Tom had made it, just because it was for him.

"Oh, Tomi," Bill breathed. Tom played a particularly rough part and Bill didn't even flinch. "For me?"

Tom nodded, looking back down at his fingers as they sloppily plucked the chords. He had to make it to the end of the song - if there was an end. He wasn’t sure. “Fuck,” he murmured. He had changed keys completely but Bill was still enthralled, still staring up at Tom with wide eyes.

“Tom,” Bill murmured, stroking his brother’s knee. “Mmm, god, you’re so sweet. Tomi…”

“Nah,” Tom mumbled, glancing up and smiling.

“Keep going,” Bill urged.

Suddenly Tom’s fingers seemed to take over, they started playing the song beautifully and Bill leaned against Tom’s legs, hugging them. He kissed Tom’s knuckles as they played and stroked down Tom’s sides. Tom kept glancing up, his cheeks permanently red.

Soon the tune just faded out and Tom wasn’t playing anymore, but he was gripping the guitar and staring at his fingers.

“So, that was it,” Tom said quietly.

Bill was silent for a moment, but then he stood up, took Tom’s guitar, and gently pushed Tom down onto the bed.

“That was,” Bill said, “the best thing I’ve ever heard.”

Tom managed a grin, watching Bill shrug off his suit jacket and kick off his shoes. “Really?”

“Mhmm,” Bill hummed. He pulled Tom’s shoes off, then worked at Tom’s belt buckle. “Now I wanna show you…”

“Nothing I haven’t seen before.”

Bill smirked, still gripping Tom’s guitar neck. He kissed the smooth wood and Tom groaned.

“Just kill me already,” Tom said.

Bill put the guitar down and tugged his pants off until he was just wearing his little black shirt and boxer briefs. He crawled over Tom and kissed his jaw. “I’m on top,” he mumbled.

“Fuck, no,” Tom moaned. Bill had just bit down gently on his earlobe, and then ran his tongue down Tom’s neck.

"Don't be stupid, Tomi," Bill said, settling on Tom. "I want to ride you."

Tom choked on the words he was about to say and kissed Bill soundly. They held onto each other and began moving together. When Bill arched back, sitting on Tom's thighs, Tom felt a little shamed "You could… on top if you wanted to. I mean, really on top." He didn't really want to be topped, it just wasn't who he was, but if Bill wanted it, he could have it. Tom would give Bill anything, even this.

Bill giggled, covering his mouth and hunching over, he was laughing so hard. "Tom, you are so dumb," he said between giggles. "That's not how we fit, dumbie."

Tom felt relieved as he stilled Bill, holding his shoulders. Bill settled over Tom’s groin, wiggling, screwing down. They both groaned as Bill’s ass rubbed against Tom’s hardening cock. “Ugh,” Tom mumbled.

“Mm,” Bill replied, closing his eyes. “Naked.”

Tom nodded, grabbing Bill by the hips and gently pushing him back. Bill reached forward and pushed Tom’s shirt up. The shirt caught on Tom’s hair and cap, and Bill laughed, knocking the hat off and kissing Tom’s face.

“Go,” Tom said, gesturing to his shirt and grinning at Bill.

Bill shook his head and folded his arms. “No, you.”

“Me?”

“Take it out,” Bill whined, peeling his own boxers down his hips.

Tom gasped and pulled his shirt off quick. He tossed it to the side and when he looked back, Bill was perfectly naked on top of him. Tom blinked, not knowing when it had happened or how, but he just had to get his hands on Bill.

“God,” Tom murmured, nuzzling his face into Bill’s chest. Bill purred a bit, leaning warmly against Tom’s lips. “Love you…”

“Love you,” Bill said, eyes flashing as he rocked his hips back and forth on Tom. Bill reached under the waist of Tom’s jeans and tugged, his cool fingers brushing Tom’s hips.

“Tomi,” Bill said softly, exposing Tom, peeling the rest of his clothes off. “Tomi.” He breathed right in Tom’s ear, raspy and wet.

“Yeah?” Tom croaked out. Bill stilled on top of him, their naked bodies pressed together at the groin.

“Happy Birthday,” Bill said, and bent down for a scorching kiss. Kissing Bill was like being knocked over by a strong wave, he felt covered and he couldn’t breathe. He was going to drown, but it was okay.

They kissed harder and harder, squirming all over each other, and Tom was sure they’d come before anything could get started, they were too drunk and needy. But Bill moved off Tom, all of that precious heat and weight leaving Tom’s body, and Tom sunk deep into the pillows and mattress.

He was lost at sea, it seemed, without Bill. He closed his eyes and felt himself drifting, he was tired and horny and so very warm.

Bill’s warmth was back, on his thighs, but he couldn’t see. His eyes weren’t cooperating and time stretched out long or sped up, quick and short bursts of thought, he wasn’t sure which.

All he knew was that his cock was suddenly covered, and when he finally was able to pry his eyes open, he could see Bill kneeling over him. Bill was stroking Tom’s dick with lube.

“Gonna sit on it,” Bill mumbled, adjusting himself over Tom. “Tomi.”

“Please,” Tom managed, wrapping his hands around Bill’s hips. “Bill.”

Bill closed his eyes and let his head fall back as he lowered himself on Tom’s cock, slowly, surely. His legs were trembling and Tom was watching Bill with his mouth open, licking at his lips, feeling his mouth go dry.

When Bill was seated on his dick they stayed still for a long moment, and Bill looked at Tom, smiling hazily.

“This is the only thing that makes sense,” Bill sighed, eyelids fluttering.

Tom agreed, but he couldn’t find his words. He had so many but his mouth wouldn’t work with him. He just watched his little brother, felt him surrounding and squeezing his cock, and let out a shaky breath.

They were eighteen now, real adults, and they didn’t have to answer to anybody anymore.

Only each other.

**

Simone was tense the entire night.

Gordon kept telling her to calm down. She knew he thought she was just nervous about the evening going well. She was hosting a smaller scale birthday party for the twins at their house in Loitsche, and nearly every relative the twins had was there. Simone had hired a catering company, along with her own home cooking.

She could not keep her eyes off her twins, though, and she ached inside at how bad things had become.

Simone couldn’t even really enjoy being around her sons anymore. She couldn’t just relax the way she used to. Of course she loved them, nothing could stop her from being her boys’ number one fan and supporter, but she could not support the one thing no one but her knew about.

She hoped, at least, that she was the only one.

For most of the evening she stayed away from her boys, watching them mingle around, smiling politely at people they hadn’t seen in years. She watched them with keen interest; could anyone else see what she saw? Were they as obvious as they looked to her?

Tom placed his hand on the very small of Bill’s back and guided him into the kitchen. He got Bill a drink and a napkin and leaned in very close, whispering something in Bill’s ear.

It all looked so very intimate, so sickly wrong, and Simone’s temper began to rise. Wouldn’t everyone know if they continued this way?

“Whoa, calm down,” Gordon said, squeezing Simone’s hand. “You look like you’re about to blow a gasket, is everything okay?”

Simone took a deep breath and attempted a smile.

“You can do better than that,” Gordon said. “C’mon, we only have them for a night, let’s make the most of it.”

She shook her head. “Don’t you think they’re acting weird, the boys?”

Gordon squinted, looking across the room where Bill and Tom were talking with their grandparents. They were very close, but hadn’t they always been? Gordon thought everything seemed very normal.

“They seem fine to me, healthy and rested for once,” Gordon said. “Seriously, what’s up?”

“I just…” She trailed off, staring at her sons. Bill’s pinky was hooked into Tom’s belt loop, playfully pulling him closer. “Gordon…”

Gordon, watching the same scene, smiled a little. “They look good,” he said. “Aren’t you happy they’re home for once, not looking so ragged?”

“Yes…” Simone sighed and leaned into Gordon. Gordon wrapped an arm around Simone, squeezing her.

“I know what it really is,” Gordon whispered.

Simone almost froze. She opened her eyes wide. “What?”

Gordon put his mouth right next to Simone’s ear. “You’re sad about them turning eighteen, not your little boys anymore. Big adults.”

Simone actually laughed, she was so relieved. If Gordon, who lived in the same house with them for all those years, hadn’t noticed, then who else would?

“And another thing,” Gordon went on.

“What?” Simone said sharply.

“It’s Bill, isn’t it?”

“What about Bill?”

“He goes to Tom now,” Gordon replied, stroking Simone’s hair. “For comfort. You think you’ve been replaced. That’s got to be hard. But you know you‘ll always be their mother.”

Simone shut her eyes briefly. “You think he really does? What do you mean?”

“I mean…” Gordon shrugged. “Shit, honey, I don’t know. Look at them.”

Simone shook her head, choosing not to. “Gordon…”

“Our kids aren’t our kids anymore, I know,” Gordon said quietly, kissing her forehead. “But it’s alright; they’ve got each other.”

Simone sighed and pulled away from her husband, and wandered back out to the party. Someone touched her shoulder and when she turned around, she saw Bill standing there, beaming.

“Hey, Mom,” Bill said brightly.

“Where’s your brother?” Simone asked coldly. It surprised her how cold it sounded.

“He’s… I don’t know, we’re not married,” Bill said, squeezing her arm.

The comment was meant to be light, a joke, but it sat very bitterly with Simone and she turned to walk away.

“Mom, wait, what the fuck?”

Simone turned around again. “What is it, Bill?”

“What the hell is going on?”

“Nothing,” Simone snapped. “Go say hello to your great aunt, she just arrived.”

“No way, I’ve never met her, and you’re obviously pissed at us,” Bill replied, standing firmly in front of her. He had his hair down and his makeup was soft, but he still had a strange power, so strange that Simone barely noticed Bill had said ‘us.’

“Just go,” Simone mumbled.

“Mom,” Bill said sharply. Tom was suddenly behind Bill, smiling until he saw the looks on their faces.

“What’s wrong?” Tom asked. Simone just sighed.

“Mom’s being…” Bill gave her a look.

“Don’t talk about me like that, like I’m being the one who’s unreasonable,” Simone said loudly. A cousin or two turned to look at them and Simone smiled weakly. “Come with me.”

She walked further into the kitchen and into the small bathroom at the very back of the house. Tom and Bill hesitated a moment, but followed.

“Some birthday,” Bill muttered as they made their way back.

“Just don’t piss her off, let her say what she wants,” Tom warned. Once they entered the small room, Simone shut the door and turned to her sons.

“I don’t like the way you act, the way you’re acting. Especially here, with all of your relatives,” she said. She wringed her hands together and was almost pacing, she was so worked up.

“How were we acting?” Tom asked, voice controlled. “We were having a fine time.”

“I don’t care what I promised you before,” Simone said. “I know about you two,” she said to Bill.

“I know,” Bill shot back. “Tomi told me.”

“And you continued?” Simone looked disgusted. “I’m surprised at you, Bill.”

“Why him?” Tom said angrily. “Do you think I’m forcing-”

“Shut up, Tom,” Bill mumbled, his cheeks burning red.

Tom looked at Bill, mouth open.

“Seriously, shut up. You’re not forcing anything, don’t ever say that.” Bill glared at his mother, and Simone rubbed at her temples.

“I’m lost,” Simone said. “I don’t know what to do.”

“Leave us the fuck alone!” Tom said loudly.

“I’m your mother,” Simone replied heatedly. “Whether you choose to respect that or not.”

“So, what? You’re immediately licensed to make your kids feel like complete shit?” Tom asked. “Because that’s how you’ve made me feel for years, Mom.”

“You’re brothers,” Simone said helplessly. “If I’ve made you feel ashamed or bad or angry, well… Well, it’s only in our family’s, and your career’s, best interest!”

“I dare you to take away the one thing that’s kept be balanced my whole life,” Tom shot back, actually reaching for Bill’s hand. “I fucking dare you, Mom.”

“Tom, please,” she said tiredly.

“Tomi, it’s okay, let’s just go,” Bill said timidly.

“No, I’m pissed off,” Tom said. His face was hot and he felt all of his emotions from over the years building up inside him. “More than pissed off. I’m ashamed of you, Mom.”

“What?” Simone threw her hands up. “Ashamed of me because of… your relationship with… your brother?”

Tom shook his head. “No, Mom, it’s so much more than that.”

Bill whimpered a bit, taking a step closer to Tom. “Tomi, let’s just go.”

“You aren’t leaving,” Simone said softly, her words icy.

“We’ll leave when we want to,” Tom said. “But not now. I need to talk to you about some things.”

Simone’s eyes narrowed and Bill dropped his head. “What?” Simone asked.

“We’re eighteen now, we’re on our own,” Tom said. He took Bill’s hand and squeezed it. “We’ve really been on our own since we were fourteen. It’s not like you’re a bad mom, but you haven’t really been around.”

“You haven’t been around,” she said wearily. “I just wanted you to be happy.”

“Then let us be happy,” Bill said, very softly. He squeezed Tom’s hand back and stared imploringly at their mother. “Please?”

“I can’t just… You two need help, I mean it. Something is wrong with you and I can’t…”

“You can,” Tom said. “Otherwise you won’t be in our lives.”

Simone gasped at the words and she felt tears prick at her eyes. “Tom, you can’t mean-”

“I don’t want to feel ashamed for loving him,” Tom said simply. “We don’t need help and we don’t need your disapproval. I love you, Mom, but I can’t live with it. I can’t live with the things you say about us, to us.”

“I’m not wrong!” she yelled. “You are! Don’t you get it, are you that sick in the head?”

Bill scooted close to Tom, right to his side and shook his head. “You don’t get it,” Bill said “You don’t have to like it, but can’t you let up?”

“I can’t,” Simone said. Her voice was full of exhaustion and anger. “You’re not the boys I… you’re not my boys.”

“We’re not,” Tom agreed. “We’re each others.”

“You’ve never loved me like Tom has,” Bill said softly.

“Because it’s sick,” Simone said through gritted teeth. “It’s wrong, it’s… It’s sick. God, why? What did I do?”

“You didn’t do anything,” Tom said. “Except make us feel like complete shit.”

“Stop this,” Simone said. “Just stop this, move on. I know you must have been confused, growing up, especially with your father and the way he is-”

“You married him,” Bill murmured.

Simone turned to Bill and slapped him hard across the face. Bill pulled away, covering his head with his hands and letting out a sharp cry. Simone looked at Tom and what she saw made her tremble a bit.

The anger in Tom’s face was so heavy that Simone actually took a step back.

“Don’t ever touch him,” Tom said lowly. “Don’t ever fucking touch him, I swear you’ll never see us again.”

Simone just stared at her older son, unblinking. Tom moved to Bill and rubbed his back, still glaring at his mother darkly. “Bill, come on, we’re leaving.”

Bill shook his head.

“Bill,” Simone began.

“No,” Tom told her. “You don’t get to talk to him.”

“Tomi,” Bill whispered.

“We’re leaving, it’s okay,” Tom said softly, kissing Bill’s forehead. “We’re leaving, maybe for good.”

“Tom, don’t,” Simone said, her voice barely audible and heavy with emotion.

“I can’t help this,” Tom said, holding Bill close. “I can’t stop and I don’t want to stop, he’s everything. I’d give it all up for him.”

Simone shook a little, staring at her boys. “Bill,” she said.

“I would, too,” Bill whispered. “I don’t care if it ruins everything.”

“That’s selfish,” Simone said. “You have to care if it-”

“I don’t,” Bill said. “And if it’s selfish, then… then I’m selfish.”

“Let’s go.” Tom tugged at Bill, pulling him toward the door. “Let’s just get out of here.”

“I guess I can’t stop you,” Simone said. “I know I can’t. But I can’t lose you.”

“Do you support us?” Tom asked.

Simone just looked at the floor, not saying a word, not moving.

“Bye, Mom,” Bill said quietly. Tom didn’t say anything as they pushed through the bathroom door and went back out into the party.

Simone leaned against the wall, swallowing a lump in her throat and feeling abandonment even worse than when her husband left her and the twins all those years ago.

**

The twins drove in silence for almost two hours. Bill was curled up in the passenger seat of Tom’s new SUV, and Tom was driving with tense, almost white knuckles.

It’d been almost two hours since they left home, since they left the party, and they both felt empty.

“Pull over,” Bill murmured. “Carsick.”

“Really?” Tom’s voice broke, he’d not spoken in so long. He glanced over at Bill and Bill did look pale. “Alright, hold on.”

He pulled off the autobahn and drove into a dark rest area. For a few minutes they sat, not speaking, and as Bill hugged his legs he pulled his jacket sleeve up and stared at the new tattoo on his forearm.

Tom leaned over, very softly, and kissed it.

“I like it, I do,” he said, looking down at Bill’s new ink. “It’s fitting.”

Bill smiled just a little and curled closer to Tom. “Do you think Mom will ever be okay with us?”

Tom didn’t know and it scared him. “Bill, I…”

“I know,” Bill said. “Will we see her again?”

Tom nodded. “Of course we will.” He wasn’t sure if that was true, but he could tell it calmed Bill. He held Bill’s arm up, kissed the tattoo again, letting his tongue slip out to lick down his forearm. “You know, we really are free.”

“How?” Bill asked.

Tom sucked on the taut cords of Bill’s wrist, nipping at his palm and then soothing the hurt with his lips. “Because we control our lives, don’t we? We just walked out of there on our own terms. We don’t have to do anything we don’t wanna do, and we’re not caged.”

“But no one can know,” Bill said sadly.

“It doesn’t matter,” Tom said. “Why does anyone else matter?”

“Because,” Bill said. He looked away from Tom. “Because I want to be able to tell Mom everything, I want to be able to just… I don’t know!”

“Bill…” Tom’s hands were sweating and he dropped Bill’s arm. “I know this isn’t easy, has it ever been?”

“Being with you is easy,” Bill said, a dumb smile forming on his face. He was suddenly crowding into Tom’s space, shoving so close until he was in Tom’s lap. “You’ve never been the problem,” he whispered against Tom’s lips. “You’ll never be the problem.”

Tom kissed Bill gently, rocked him in is arms. “We don’t have a problem, other people do. I don’t care if it’s wrong, because the world’s a fucked up place, anyway, and how can this hurt anyone?” He squeezed Bill hard, held him until his arms ached.

“Fuck,” Bill sighed into Tom’s neck. “We’re hurting Mom, I never thought about it before.”

“Why should it hurt her?” Tom asked. “I just love you, why should that be so bad?”

“It shouldn’t,” Bill said. He breathed out deeply against Tom, his entire body finally relaxing, melting. “You’re the only person who’s never hurt me, you’re the only person I need.”

“God, Bill, then never leave me,” Tom said, hugging Bill with a fierce, desperate love. “Never.”

“Never,” Bill repeated. Bill cradled Tom’s face, his forearm pressing against Tom’s cheek.

Tom kissed Bill’s tattoo again. “Then we’re free, as long as we’re together.”

Bill laughed and wiped a tear away from Tom’s face. “You’ve been turning into a girl on me lately,” Bill said. “First that song and now this.”

“Hey! That song wasn’t nearly as girly when I was sober,” Tom defended. “Didn’t you like it?”

“I loved it,” Bill said, “Really. We should come up with words, put it on a CD.”

“I don’t know about that,” Tom said. “That was just for you.”

“I get it,” Bill said, eyes flashing. He kissed Tom hard, caressing the back of his neck and sucking his bottom lip into his mouth. Tom groaned, squirming in his seat as Bill got closer, closer. They rocked slowly together and when Bill pulled back, he was smiling.

“Let’s go to a really expensive hotel,” Bill said. “Big fuckin’ beds and room service and…”

“Can’t afford that.”

“We’re eighteen,” Bill replied. “We can afford whatever the fuck we want.”

“Okay,” Tom agreed. “Which hotel?”

“That one in Berlin that you love, you know. The one with the huge bathtub and really good waffles.” Bill leaned back, wincing as the steering wheel dug into his backside. “Mmm, I could go for some really good waffles.”

After one last kiss, Bill slid back into the passenger seat and Tom turned on the car again. Bill stared out the window, watching the city lights come into view, leaning against the glass.

“Bill,” Tom murmured.

“Hm?”

“I’m sorry I got so mad back there, but when she hit you…”

Bill shook his head. “Didn’t hurt, not like that, anyway.”

“It’s gonna be better from now on.”

“Is it?”

Tom looked at Bill and frowned. “If it isn’t, I’ve still got you, so what does it matter?”

“Mm,” Bill murmured, glancing back at Tom and smiling a little. “You always had me.”

Tom directed his attention back to the road and felt Bill’s hand on the side of his face. He leaned into the touch, feeling warm and relaxed.

They’d never had anyone but each other, not really, and as long as they were in their own little world, they were safe. The entire world could disappear; it wouldn’t matter.

It was the twins against everyone else, and for the first time, they had won.

Don't Tell Mom 13/14 Bill/Tom NC-17

Sun, 16 Mar 2008 04:34:05 GMT

Title: Don't Tell Mom (13/14)
Previous Chapters: Here
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17 <
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: What Mom doesn't know won't kill her.

Age 17

Two pairs of eyes stared silently at Tom from across the dinner table. They belonged to the daughters of his father's girlfriend, twins, at that. Both eleven. Tom shifted uncomfortably. They were watching his every move, and even though he was used to it, it made him uneasy.

Perhaps it was the whole atmosphere. Tom and Bill had been invited to dinner at their father's house for their seventeenth birthday. It was clear that none of them wanted the dinner to happen, they were just going through the motions. Their father's girlfriend Jacinda seemed to be the only one unaware of how uncomfortable the situation was.

"Girls," she said, tapping the little blond girl closest to her on the wrist. "Don't stare. Eat your meal."

"It's okay," Tom mumbled, managing a smile for them.

Jorg cleared his throat. "Since the girls moved in, all we hear about is your band, hour after hour…"

"I have posters all over my wall," one of the girls said shyly. Her sister elbowed her, blushing furiously. "What? I do."

Bill, who sat next to Tom, grinned at the little girl, though Tom could see the situation was draining him. They’d just finished up recording their latest album, and the last thing they’d wanted to do was spend an awkward evening with their father and his new family.

They hadn’t even wanted to do anything for their birthday, they were that worn down. And they needed each other; spending nearly an entire month cramped in the same small bungalow with Georg and Gustav had almost obliterated their sex life.

Tom wanted to spend the night in bed, preferably with Bill and a bottle of their favorite lube. He’d had all sorts of plans for his brother (he’d even rented a hotel room in the city), plans that made his hands shake and his groin burn with longing.

But Jorg had called that morning with his own plans and Simone insisted they give their father another chance. They hadn’t seen or heard from him in months, and though Tom’s heart was cold for the man, he couldn’t say no to Bill.

Bill wanted things to be okay with Jorg, especially now that he felt so disconnected from his mother.

"I can sign some of them, anything you want, actually," Bill told the little girl, and the flush that filled her cheeks matched her twin sister's. "Did you know Tomi and I are twins just like you?"

"Yes, we know everything," the less shy one spoke up, almost proudly. She burst into giggles. "You guys don't look alike, though!"

"That's Tom's fault, he was sick of me, so he didn't want to look in the mirror and see someone who looked just like me," Bill replied, grinning. Tom slumped in his chair a little, feeling so sick to his stomach at how amiable Bill was acting. He was a star, through and through. A real performer.

"I want a star tattoo just like yours. I just saw it in Bravo," the other girl spoke up quietly. "Did it hurt?"

Jorg put his fork down. "I don't think so."

Bill looked at his father, and then at the girls. "No, it tickled. Really hard."

"I still can't believe your mother let you do all of that to yourself," Jorg muttered.

"All of what?" Tom asked, staring his father in the eyes for the first time in years.

Jorg stared back, and there was absolutely no emotion in his eyes. "Jacinda," he said to his girlfriend, not taking his gaze off Tom. "I think it's time for Callie and Chrissy to go to bed."

"It's only seven," Jacinda said, looking confused. "We've just started eating."

"I want Bill to sign my stuff," one of the girls whined.

"No," Jorg said, almost angrily. "I don't want anymore of that in my house."

“Jorg,” Jacinda said, touching his arm. “The girls have been looking forward to this all week, and they-”

Jorg slammed his fist down hard on the table, shaking the plates and glasses. Jacinda looked down to her lap and the little girls squeaked in unison, hopping up from the table to run to the stairs. Tom’s face burned with anger as he watched the little girls go, a wave of empathy washing over him.

In some ways they reminded Tom of him and Bill when they were younger. Of course, only in some ways. He looked to Bill; his brother was exhausted. They didn’t need this, not now.

“I’m sorry,” Jacinda said, looking over to Bill. “It’s your birthday and… they were just excited, is all.”

“It’s fine,” Bill said softly. “They didn’t say anything wrong,”

“I’m not going to have you treated like some freaks!” Jorg boomed. “It’s sick.”

Bill and Tom shared a look. “No, I said it’s fine,” Bill retorted.

“We aren’t freaks,” Tom said quietly.

“Ever since… Hell, I don’t know. You’ve always acted like you were something special, and your mother did nothing to stop it. Tom, you turned out alright. God willing. But Bill…” Jorg shook his head. “Sometimes I turn on the television and I can’t even look at you.”

Bill stared at his father. “Are you kidding me?” Tom asked, feeling his ears heat up.

“I blame your fucking mother,” Jorg said, posing to stand up. Jacinda shifted uncomfortably, looking at her plate. “You didn’t have a chance, neither of you did. You know what? I blame myself. If I’d have stayed-“

“You didn’t stay,” Tom replied loudly. “It’s you who’s fucked-”

Jorg stood up, his face twisting in anger. “Don’t you dare talk to me like that, Tom. Not again. Not in my house.”

Tom felt his blood boil. “I’d like to go home.”

“No, you’ll listen, you’ll stay.” Jorg glanced over both twins, his eyes lingering on Bill. “Jacinda made dinner special.”

“I did,” she said, nodding up at the twins. “I hope… I hope you liked it.”

Tom felt sorry for Jacinda, just as he felt sorry for the girls, but it wasn’t enough to make him stay. He promised himself he’d never let his father hurt Bill again, never let him say the sorts of things to Bill that he could tell were boiling up inside his father.

But then Bill spoke up. “Dinner was delicious, thank you Jacinda.” He looked at Tom, eyes pleading. “We haven’t even had cake, yet.”

“I made that special, too,” Jacinda said. Tom looked over his father’s shoulder to the small chocolate cake on the counter. Bill hated chocolate, but Tom was certain Jacinda wouldn’t have known that; her daughters maybe, but not her.

“And the girls should have some, too,” Bill said. He stood and smiled at Jorg. “How about I pop upstairs and get them, okay? It’d probably mean a lot to them.”

Jorg was softening a bit, just like most people did under Bill’s charming demeanor. “All right,” Jorg said. “But I don’t want… this party is for you. I just want this to be nice, normal. We’re a family.”

Bill nodded. “I’ll be right back.” Tom tried to catch Bill’s eye, tried to get a read on what his brother was feeling, thinking, but Bill was up the stairs before Tom could say another word.

**

Bill found the twins’ bedroom easily, and he smiled as he saw pictures of himself and the rest of the band on their door. It reminded him of when he was little, when he’d plastered Nena’s picture everywhere in his room.

His heart ached for the girls, knew that life with Jorg must not be perfect. He knew his father would never physically hurt anyone, but sometimes the verbal was worse than the physical. Some of Bill’s most shamed, painful moments were with his father, and he winced at the memories.

He knocked lightly on the door. "Who is it?" came a small voice from inside.

"It's Tom," Bill said, deepening his voice a little. "Let me in."

He heard giggles from behind the door and when it opened, the girls laughed. "Liar," one of them said. The other just blushed.

"Okay, it's Bill," Bill said, rolling his eyes. He glanced over their room. There were posters of the band everywhere. It almost made him a little dizzy. "You guys want some cake?"

"Mom made it," they both said at the same time. One of them made a face and added, "She's a terrible cook."

"So's mine." Bill crouched down on the floor and looked around again. "You guys have more shit than I do."

The girls giggled even louder. "Can you sign some of it?" the shyer girl asked, and her sister nudged her. "Just some of it, jeez."

"Do you have a marker?" Bill cracked a smile. He hadn't felt so at ease with fans in ages, and it was calming him, even though he was incredibly uncomfortable in his father's house. Things hadn't changed. Bill still felt out of place, abnormal, unwanted in his father's presence. He knew nothing would change between them, but he wanted things to be okay.

Downstairs, Tom was still sitting with his father and Jacinda, and there was an awkward silence hanging over the table. Jacinda had taken the cake out and had put seventeen candles on it.

"What the hell are they doing up there?" Jorg mumbled, drumming his fingers impatiently. "He'd better not be putting ideas in their heads and-"

"And what?" Tom asked irritably.

Jorg just shook his head. "How long has he been… with that hair?"

Tom just sighed and stood up. "I'm going to check on them," he said as he left the table and went for the stairs. As he was climbing the steps, the two giggling girls bounded down beside him. Tom smiled at them, once again feeling a tug of empathy – he hoped Jorg was good to them.

Tom wandered down the upstairs hallway and saw Bill standing with his arms folded, gazing at a picture on the wall. Tom stepped right beside him and looked; it was a very small, old family portrait, just the two boys, Jorg, and Simone.

"Mom's hair was so crazy," was all Bill said, softly.

Tom smirked and put a hand on Bill's lower back. He looked at the picture, squinting. "I can't even tell which one is me."

"You're the one with the fat cheeks."

"Now you are," Tom said, pushing Bill playfully. Bill scoffed and pushed Tom back, but Tom grabbed him around the waist and Bill rested his head against Tom's.

"This is awkward," Bill murmured. "This whole night. Jacinda's nice."

"She's hot," Tom replied. Bill pinched his twin's side and Tom shrugged.

"I wanna go." Bill turned to Tom and pouted slightly, the sort of pout that drove Tom insane with need. "This sucks."

“Bill…” Tom said, tugging Bill closer. “I was trying to make a break for it earlier, you know.”

Bill smiled. “I didn’t want to just leave the girls, and I don’t want to fight with Dad.”

Tom wrapped his arms around Bill’s slender frame and kissed him gently on the mouth. He could feel Bill trembling as their lips touched. Fuck, they hadn’t even been able to fool around in ages; Gustav always seemed to be watching them.

“You’re sweet,” Tom said, drawing back from his brother. “I think you made their entire year.”

“Someone needs to have a good time tonight,” Bill said.

Tom let his hands run down Bill’s body and he squeezed his hips. “We’re gonna,” Tom said, right into Bill’s ear. Bill shivered and it was contagious. Tom shivered right alongside Bill. “I rented a hotel in Berlin.”

“Tomi,” Bill breathed. “God, I want you…”

Neither twin could hold back, not now, not when they were tucked away in the corner of a dark hallway and no one was around. Well, not close, anyway. Tom kissed Bill’s breath away and pressed him hard against the wall. It was desperate and hot and both boys were aching at the first touch of tongues.

“Gonna fuck you when we get back, gonna… shit…” Tom grabbed Bill’s ass and forced Bill’s groin to smash into his own. “Bill, Bill…”

"Can't," Bill managed, sighing out one last kiss and pushing Tom away. He smiled a little, still holding Tom's shirt. "God, you're bad. You almost had me on my knees."

"Mm," Tom murmured. "And?"

"And I'd… suck it," Bill said, his cheeks flushed. "Fuck, why do I feel shy?"

"Because we're at Dad's," Tom replied, trying not to look at Bill because looking at Bill was what almost ruined him before. "Come on, let's go choke down some cake and then leave."

"Wait." Bill tugged Tom a little closer, a wicked little smirk on his lips. "One more kiss to remember me by."

Tom groaned. "To remember you by?"

"You're gonna kill me tonight," Bill whispered, leaning forward and breathing hotly on Tom's neck. "In Berlin."

"Oh," he said softly. He leaned forward and kissed Bill's lips and lingered for a moment, and Bill purred a bit. When they pulled apart, Bill was still clinging to the fabric of Tom's shirt. Tom looked at Bill and felt proud, and so aroused he ached.

They embraced for a few minutes, rocking with each other. Bill sighed deeply, inhaling Tom's scent, and said softly, "God, I love you."

“I know, I-”

“What the hell are you two doing?”

Bill’s eyes flashed up and caught their father’s gaze. “What?” he asked, stepping back but not letting go of Tom’s shirt. Tom tried to pull away but Bill wouldn’t let him. “What?” Bill asked again. He tipped his head to the side and gave his father a cold stare.

“You two…”

Tom watched as his father’s jaw worked, watched as his fists clenched. They hadn’t been caught doing anything particularly shocking, but for Jorg, it was enough.

“Let go of him,” Jorg said to Tom. “Let go of him and come downstairs.”

“Come on, Bill,” Tom said. He didn’t want another fight, but Bill’s eyes were dark and he pulled Tom closer.

“I never had a father because of you,” Bill said, slow and soft at first, but then his words gained momentum and anger. “I never had a father!” He stroked his hands up Tom’s sides roughly and shot Jorg a deadly look. “Don’t tell me to let go of the one person who’s never let me down.”

“That isn’t right,” Jorg said. “That isn’t-”

Bill let go of Tom, but not to appease Jorg. Suddenly, all the years of hiding his face from his father, of just plain hiding had become too much. “I don’t care what it is!” Bill almost yelled. “I don’t… love you.”

Jorg’s face reddened and Bill grabbed Tom’s hand. “Let’s go, Tomi.”

Tom followed Bill down the steps, leaving Jorg to stare after them. He wanted to call down the stairs but his feet wouldn’t move and his mouth was working dumbly around apologies he didn’t know how to spit out.

**

Tom held Bill down and licked his neck, inhaling the lovely scent of Bill's hair and skin. He hadn't felt so insistent on devouring Bill whole in a while, and after the night they'd just had, Tom wanted Bill to be sure that he was wanted.

Bill let out a low rumble of a purr and arched into Tom, willingly giving himself, spreading his legs and locking his ankles around Tom's waist. They were still fully clothed, with shoes on even, but as soon as they'd checked into the hotel and gotten into their room, Tom had wasted no time in pushing Bill down on the bed and grinding into him.

The lights were low and all that could be seen were grasping limbs and pleading looks, each tangled together and fighting for a dominance that they both knew would easily go to Tom. Bill struggled to sit up, if only to kiss his twin's neck, and Tom allowed it but then quickly held Bill down again. He was going to take care of Bill tonight.

"Need you," Bill whimpered softly, his voice heavy with emotion. Years of abandonment issues were building up inside him and he'd never felt so grateful for his brother, and Tom had never felt so proud of Bill. In a way they'd become closer, freer, more independent of everything but each other.

Seventeen years old and they were still irresistible to each other, if not more than ever. Tom's cock was aching with need, and Bill's insides were twitching almost painfully.

“Get on me,” Bill groaned out.

“I am on you,” Tom said. He ducked his head and sucked powerfully on Bill’s neck. He was sure it’d leave a mark and his stomach twisted with arousal.

“No, I need more, harder,” Bill said back. He thrust his hips up, nearly knocking Tom off him.

“Calm down,” Tom gritted out. Bill was riling him up so fast he was afraid he’d come before they even got their pants off. “We need to slow down.”

“But I need…” Bill’s head fell back as they moved together, grinding and panting. “Oh, tell me how bad you want in me, Tomi.”

Tom grinded down harder, kissing Bill’s throat and flattening his palms down on Bill’s narrow hips. “So bad, so fuckin’ bad.”

They moved together in near silence for a few blissed out moments before Bill moaned brokenly into Tom’s ear, “Would you never see Dad again if it meant you could be in me?”

Tom was so aroused he couldn’t think straight. “Bill…”

“Or Mom? Would you fuck them all off to fuck me? Does it ache so bad for you, too?”

"Nothing else matters," was all Tom could manage, lifting himself and dragging his hips across Bill's. They both moaned, their pants were digging into them and causing less than pleasant sensations. "Get naked, get naked for me, baby."

Bill's eyes flashed and he lifted his arms, pouting. "Help."

Tom smirked a little and almost ripped Bill's shirt off, and then he slid Bill's jeans and boxers off without even unzipping. After Bill kicked both his shoes off, he was perfectly naked, and Tom shook a little. "God… God."

"Am I good?" Bill stretched out, displaying himself shamelessly for Tom. Tom palmed his crotch, easing his hot erection. God, but Bill looked good enough to eat, swallow, and fuck. "Am I the best you've seen, Tomi?"

Tom let out a ragged sigh and leaned back, still transfixed on Bill's body. "I… Fuck… Bill, if it meant I could just fuck you one more time, I'd leave everyone behind."

Bill leaned forward, his lips parted. "What about a kiss?"

"Fuck them all," Tom replied, kneeling forward. He had no intention of taking his clothes off, not yet. The power shift between them was so intense. Tom had Bill naked, but Bill had Tom.

"What if it meant just… seeing me?" Bill laid his head back and elongated his whole body, spanning the entire length of the king sized bed. "What if…"

"Shh." Tom dipped down and licked Bill's hip bone. Bill's cock bumped Tom's neck and Tom smiled, stroking it once with trembling knuckles.

“What do I get for my birthday?” Bill asked and Tom’s hand moved down to cup his balls. “Hmmm, Tomi?” Bill’s legs spread open and Tom could feel heat pulsating off Bill’s body.

“What do you want most?” Tom asked. He knelt between Bill’s legs and stroked up his naked thighs, watching Bill squirm and arch into the touches.

“I want…” Bill mewled as Tom’s fingers brushed down the crease of his ass. “I want your tongue… in me.”

Tom could’ve growled at the words, but instead he slid down the bed, licking Bill’s hips, thighs, balls, and ass as he moved. Bill smelled musky and tasted clean. Tom wasted no time in pushing Bill’s hips up and licking straight down the crease of his brother’s ass.

"Yes," Bill sighed out, closing his eyes and reaching to grip anything on Tom. He grabbed a fistful of hair, and he squeezed the dreadlocks between his fingers, just savoring the hot wetness sliding down his ass. It felt delicious and Bill could almost taste it; Tom's tongue was such a familiar thing to him and he was so used to it licking every inch of his body.

Tom inhaled against Bill's ass and found his hole. He licked all around it, teasingly poking his tongue in, shallowly. Bill moaned, squirming and almost squeezing Tom's head with his thighs. It drove Tom crazy and though it hindered his licking, he loved when Bill squeezed his head like that. He loved driving Bill absolutely crazy.

"Tomi, Tomi," Bill moaned softly, letting go of Tom's hair and grabbing the sheets behind him. He wanted to scream, he wanted to implode on himself. It wasn't even that Tom's tongue was hitting deep inside him, not yet. Bill looked down and saw his brother’s face buried in his ass. It was that Tom would press his mouth in and suck without hesitation; that was what made Bill’s belly ache. "Oh, Tom…"

Tom grunted in reply, and all that could be heard were intense sucking sounds, the smacking of lips and moisture. Bill felt Tom's nose nudging his balls and it made his toes curl. He would have Tom lick him forever if it was possible. Bill reached down and grabbed his cock and pulled, but Tom put a hand over his and signaled that he was going to do it. He was going to take care of Bill all the way.

“Yes, wanna come,” Bill said, sighing in pleasure as Tom’s hot hand encircled his dick. Wanking never felt as good as when Tom was inside him. His fingers, his mouth, his dick, it didn’t matter. Bill arched up into the first gentle stroke and pressed down against Tom’s mouth, which was working against him eagerly.

Tom pressed inside deeper, his jaw already aching. He moaned against Bill’s ass, rubbing himself against the bed, wishing now that he was naked so he could find some relief. He wanted to make Bill come like this, but he wasn’t sure if he’d have the patience. His own erection was straining against his jeans, and he knew he could make them both come if he could open Bill up enough for his dick.

“Jesus,” Tom said, right against Bill’s ass. Bill’s fingers dug into Tom’s scalp, his hips rocking up and almost riding Tom’s tongue, his face.

“Please, just, don’t stop,” Bill begged.

Tom stroked Bill's swollen cock harder, thumbing the head and smearing the precome down. He couldn't say no to Bill, no matter how bad he needed to come himself. He grinded into Bill, squeezing his cock and groaning, Bill was trembling beneath him and working him up in ways he hadn't felt in a long, long time.

They were lost for each other, completely gone. Tom inhaled deeply, pushing his tongue forward and licking deep inside Bill. Bill tasted so fresh and so familiar, and as Tom swallowed, he nearly came hard. He was transfixed on Bill's ass, more specifically, his hole. He touched himself over his jeans, feeling the hardness, and pulled away from Bill.

Bill looked down, eyes wide, forehead glistening with sweat. "God, what is it? Tom… Tomi?"

"It's just…" Tom leaned forward and licked at Bill's swollen opening again, causing Bill to twitch. "Just, fuck. I know I say this all the time but…"

"I look so good." Bill managed a smile and Tom exhaled. "Right?"

"No, you look fucking amazing, and you taste like I want to fuck you hard," Tom replied, burying his face in Bill's ass again. He sucked in powerfully and Bill screamed, filling the hotel room with his begging pleas.

“Oh… almost, almost, almost,” Bill began chanting. Tom wasn’t even touching Bill’s dick anymore, but it didn’t matter, Bill was going to come anyway. “Oh, Tomi, oh, Tomi, oh, Tomi.”

It was the sweetest mantra Tom had ever heard. He licked across Bill’s hole and flicked it gently, watching Bill’s hips buck and his cock twitch. He teased at Bill one more time before pressing inside again, twisting his tongue deeply in his brother.

Bill cried out and clutched hard at Tom’s head, rocking his ass down into Tom’s face. Two more intimate licks and Bill screamed, coming hotly across his belly and chest. Tom sighed and grinned, and leaned back as he took in the sight. Bill was still writhing slowly, rubbing his hand up and down his stomach, smearing his come. Tom reached to touch Bill's hip and Bill flinched, closing his eyes and smiling lazily.

"Mm, so good, always so good," Bill murmured, drawing his knees up and sprawling his arms to his sides.

"You want something even better?" Tom asked softly, already unbuckling his belt. "Bill?"

"Mm." Bill tilted his head to the side, his eyes still shut. "I don't know what could be better."

"Oh." Tom quietly slid his jeans down his hips and took his hard cock out. He held it over Bill's stomach and dragged it along the lines of Bill's belly, stopping to admire the new star tattoo. Bill let out a breathy laugh, but didn't open his eyes.

"Oh, that… Careful, Tomi, it's still sore," Bill whispered.

"Look."

Bill shook his head. "If I look, I'll jump on you."

"So, look."

Bill lazily opened his eyes, looking down his body and groaning. His cock leapt, already hardening as he watched Tom gently press his dick against the newly inked skin.

“You can… you can do it a little harder,” Bill breathed.

Tom stared down at the tattoo and hissed, rubbing his cock against it a bit more insistently. The tattoo had been driving him crazy for days and he shuddered, thinking about shooting his load all over it. He’d have to make that a reality.

He smoothed his hands up Bill’s chest, gathering his brother’s come on his fingers and nudging his cock between Bill’s legs.

“Are you sore here?” Tom asked, pressing a slick finger against Bill’s hole. “Did I make it sore?”

Bill shook his head and pushed down against Tom’s finger. “Make it sore,” Bill said. “C’mon, Tomi.”

Tom gave Bill a half smile and nudged Bill's blushing hole with his hard dick. "You don't give me much of a choice."

"It's because I only want it one way." Bill's eyes were so dark, he wasn't playing anymore. "You like my star?"

"It's so slutty," Tom admitted, feeling heavy in his gut. He loved thinking about how slutty Bill could be, and he knew Bill didn't even try. Well, not really. Tom gripped Bill's hip, thumbing the inked area as he pressed his hips forward and teased Bill's hole.

"God, please," Bill said, getting up on his elbows and watching his brother. "You have to."

"I know." Tom spread Bill's ass with two steady hands and nudged in, his cock just breaching Bill's body. Bill moaned loudly and opened his thighs wider until they were almost perpendicular with his body. Tom could barely even look, the sight was too much and he wanted to be slamming into Bill repeatedly. "Can I go fast?"

"I said make it sore," Bill said softly. "I really want to feel you."

"I'll be careful."

"No," Bill said, his tone almost desperate. "You're always so careful with me, Tomi, and I love you so much. This time, I want you to do it so hard. I just want you to fuck me harder than you ever have… Please."

Bill's words shook Tom to the core and he paused before sliding into his brother. "I've fucked you pretty hard."

Bill nodded, gasping. "Please."

Tom could have shouted as he sunk in deeper, he’d barely prepared Bill at all, and without lube his cock was squeezed harder than it’d ever been before. Only precome eased the way, and they both tensed at the sensation.

“Oh my god, oh my god,” Bill panted out. “Fuck, it hurts so good.”

Tom sunk in to the hilt, shaking as he propped himself up over Bill. “Does it?” Bill felt even tighter than the first time, felt even hotter and Tom wanted him even more now. “Can I-” Before Tom could even finish his question, before Bill could even answer, he jerked out and thrust back in, grunting as Bill clenched around him.

“Oh, no, please, oh,” Bill babbled.

“No?” Tom thrust in again and Bill wrapped his legs tight around Tom’s body. “Or yes?”

“It hurts, it hurts,” Bill whined. “But don’t stop. Go harder, please.”

Tom felt absolutely no shame as he fucked his brother into the mattress, felt only a blinding heat and the almost painful need to come. “I’m gonna come,” he said. “Bill…”

“Not yet, not yet, Tomi,” Bill said. “Gotta fuck me longer, please.”

"Christ," Tom managed, sinking his cock deep inside Bill and pressing his hips right to Bill's ass. He held in for a moment and saw that there were tears on Bill's cheeks. He touched Bill's face. "Bill, baby, are you-"

"Keep going," Bill whimpered. "It hurts, yeah, but fuck. I need this, just… Just…"

Tom dragged his cock out again and then rammed in, his balls slapping hard against Bill’s ass, and they both groaned this time. Everything felt so hot, so tight, so confined and amazing. Tom kept a hand on Bill's face and Bill sucked one of Tom's fingers into his mouth, and bit down hard. Tom cried out and fell forward, their noses bumping.

"Hey," Tom said softly, kissing Bill's face, and Bill just closed his eyes and nuzzled up into Tom's neck. "You look so good, Bill. You feel so good, you always do…"

"I love you," Bill sighed raggedly, clenching tight around Tom and licking at his neck. Tom jerked forward, almost coming, almost shooting his entire load inside Bill, but his eyes landed on Bill's new star and he held back, taking a deep breath and kissing Bill hard.

"You want it?" Tom asked. "Do you want it? Because I want it."

"Give it."

Tom thrust into Bill one more time before he felt the familiar tug in his belly and he came once, in Bill, then he pulled out and jerked forward again. More come spilled from his cock and decorated Bill's star, and they both gasped. Tom held Bill down and pressed his cock against Bill's hip, needing to feel him, needing this to not be over yet.

“Put it back in,” Bill said, pushing Tom down his body by the hips. “Please, I need…”

Tom grabbed his sensitive dick and winced as he pushed back inside Bill’s body. He was still hard, but completely spent. His head dropped forward and he moaned half in pain, half in pleasure.

“God, Tomi, please fuck me,” Bill said. His voice was desperate, cracking, and so Tom thrust weakly into Bill, grinding his teeth as he grinded against his brother.

“I can’t,” Tom said. “It feels so…”

Tom couldn’t, so Bill moved for him, jerking his hips against Tom and shaking all over the bed.

“Please, Bill,” Tom groaned. “Come, come!” Bill arched back, squeezing Tom’s dick so hard he saw stars. “Ngh, Bill! I love you, I love you.” He wrapped his hands around Bill’s erection and just held on as Bill moved for them both.

"So close, god, it's so close I can feel it," Bill whined, riding Tom's dick and shaking all over. "God, Tomi, I want it so bad, so bad…"

"Come on," Tom said quietly, burying his face in Bill's neck, his lips by Bill's ear. "Come on, I want to feel it. Can you feel it in you?"

"Yes, yes, yes," Bill hissed, his face completely contorted. "Oh, yes… Squeeze it, Tom, take it and please…"

Tom managed to hold onto Bill's dick and stroke it hard, he felt the hotness in his hand, the swollen length, and he knew Bill must have been frustratingly close to coming. He smiled and kept stroking Bill, groaning as his cock got ridden. Bill sighed out, his hair pressed flat to his forehead with sweat, and as he gave one last shout, he came hard in Tom's hand and everything went dark for both of them.

"Don't leave, don't pull out," Bill whispered, putting a hand to his forehead and rubbing. "Just… stay."

"I can't move," Tom replied, releasing Bill's cock and rubbing his wet hand between them, slicking the come all over their warm bodies. Bill still had a vice grip around Tom with his legs and he relaxed, letting his feet fall to the mattress and Tom shifted inside him. "Oh, Bill…"

“You’re still hard,” Bill said. “Mmm, do you wanna…”

“No, I can’t,” Tom said. “Don’t, uh, move.” They both stilled and just held onto each other tightly.

“This wasn’t such a bad birthday after all,” Bill said.

Tom kissed Bill’s neck and sighed happily. “When you told off Dad…” His mouth opened against Bill’s neck and he sucked lovingly on the skin. “It was so hot. You were so…”

Bill’s hips moved under Tom and they rocked together on the bed. So slowly, so softly, so sweetly.

“I don’t think we should see him again.” Bill gasped as the rocking became harder, as Tom became harder inside him. “Tom, I thought you couldn’t.”

Tom bit down on Bill’s neck and humped forward with a moan. “Do you want me to stop?”

Bill was sore and exhausted and his heart ached just enough to make little tears spring from his eyes. But he held tight onto Tom because he was the only thing that really mattered in his life at that moment. Not their father or their careers or what anyone would think of what they were doing.

“Make me scream,” Bill whispered.

They found safety in each other and understanding. They found passion and heat and hell. But Bill didn’t believe in hell, or maybe he just didn’t care. He only believed in the fires that were already beginning to lick at his groin, and of course, Tom.

And that’s how it’d always been.

Don't Tell Mom 12/14

Thu, 06 Mar 2008 09:08:40 GMT

Title: Don't Tell Mom (12/14)
Previous Chapters: Here
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17 <
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: What Mom doesn't know won't kill her.

In the morning, completely sober and slightly hungover, Tom wanted to smack himself upside the head for how careless they’d been. Not just for the night before, but for everything. They’d been so careless, at home, on the bus, in clubs…

Tom watched Bill sleep soundly on the bed and he shook his head. Their own mother knew, and now Gustav might know, too. They were obviously losing control of the situation. Tom wanted to feel worse about, to feel guilty or shameful, but a large part of him couldn’t feel bad about how much he wanted his brother.

Was it so wrong that he didn’t always want to hide it?

"Yeah, it is," he mumbled to himself. He sighed and let his hand stroke gently down Bill’s long body before getting up. He decided to go down to breakfast early.

He wasn’t hungry, but he knew Gustav would be.

After getting dressed and washed up, Tom gave Bill a kiss on the belly and left to go down to the breakfast area. He tugged on his cap nervously as he rode the elevator down. What was he even going to say?

Tom was afraid he might confess everything, just to tell someone. He wasn’t confident that Gustav would be on their side, but all the hiding and sneaking around was really weighing on him.

"Morning," Tom said as he walked into the breakfast area. Gustav was sitting at a table with a newspaper and a plate of waffles.

"Oh, hey," Gustav replied. He put the paper down and gestured to the chairs. "Help yourself. Free continental breakfast."

Tom managed a laugh. "For sure."

"You’re up early." Gustav leaned forward. "Something on your mind?"

"No." Tom looked away, pretended to glance over the breakfast selection. "Why?"

Gustav took a long sip of his juice. "I don’t know, Tom."

There it was, that tone. Tom was immediately sure that Gustav knew something. Tom tried to shrug off his nerves, tried to relax his shoulders and appear casual.

"These hotel beds were awful."

"Mine was alright, but I had the whole bed to myself, so," Gustav said, back to reading his paper.

Tom bit at his lip. What did that mean? He decided to ignore it, and grabbed some breakfast, even though he felt like throwing up.

"So," Gustav said, his paper obscuring his face. "How’s Bill this morning?"

Tom dropped the bagel he was holding. "How should I know?" Nope, that didn’t sound defensive at all.

"You two are sharing a room," Gustav said blandly. "Just like Georg and me. Right?"

Tom nodded and then said, "Yeah, but he was sleeping when I left. Um. He got really drunk last night, you know?"

"You both did," Gustav said. "Light weights."

Gustav chuckled a bit and it calmed Tom. "Uh, yeah. I hardly remember anything," Tom lied. "Didn’t do anything embarrassing, did I?"

Gustav chuckled again. "Oh, the usual.”

Tom stared at his breakfast, his stomach churning unpleasantly. "That bad, huh?"

"Nothing I haven’t seen before." Gustav turned the page and snorted. "Georg is still out cold, though. He won’t be able to even tell you that we went out last night. Did you see him? Face down on the table in that booth."

Tom managed to get out a weak laugh.

"He behaved himself, though," Gustav went on.

The terrible feeling in Tom’s stomach worsened and he leaned back, completely giving up on eating anything. Gustav still had his head buried in the newspaper and Tom desperately wanted to see his face. The newspaper was acting as a wall between them. It was frustrating.

"But you know," Gustav said, looking over his paper. "We should all be more careful about how much we drink, maybe. Some things I might find normal, others won’t."

Tom looked at Gustav carefully, not breaking his gaze. "Like what?"

The paper went up again and Gustav said, "You know."

"I do?"

Gustav laughed, he was doing a lot of that this morning. "I hope so. Anyway, is that why you came down here so early?"

"Uh, I…"

"Because only we should know," Gustav said.

"We?"

"You’re not a dumbass, Tom. Stop acting like one. I don’t think playing dumb is going to help anyone," Gustav said, his tone a bit sharp. "Just… don’t drink so much, alright? We won’t always be around to-"

"Okay," Tom said quickly, standing up and pushing his breakfast away. "You can have the rest of this, I’m going to go… Yeah."

"Later," Gustav said curtly.

Tom casually walked away as fast as he could. He walked until he got to his hotel room and when he let himself in, Bill attacked him.

"Tomi," Bill said breathily, latching his arms around Tom’s neck. "Where’d you go? It’s so early."

"I went down to have breakfast with Gustav," Tom said, gently prying Bill’s arms from around him.

Bill looked slightly concerned. "Oh, yeah? How did that go?"

Tom sat down on the bed and rubbed his forehead under his cap. He couldn’t look at Bill. Even in the privacy of their own room he felt like he was being watched. He just let out a short sigh and turned the television on.

"It was fine."

**

A few weeks later, the twins were home for a weekend to celebrate their mother’s 40th birthday. The neighbors had planned a party for Simone, and though it was meant to be a surprise, she was such a snoop that she had known about it for weeks.

Bill and Tom were sitting on the couch in the neighbor’s living room, watching the action at the party. They each had drinks in their hands, and they were incredibly uncomfortable.

Tom took a long sip and stole a glance at Bill. His little brother was curled in a ball, his legs folded under his body, and he was staring blankly ahead. Every once in a while, one of their family friends would swoop by, telling them what a nice thing it was that they had managed to come. As if showing up for their mother’s birthday party was some amazing sacrifice they had to make.

"Yawn," Bill mumbled, setting his glass down on the table behind him. Tom just nodded. Bill edged a little closer to Tom on the couch and Tom tensed. "How long do we have to stay?"

"You boys aren’t thinking of skipping out already?" Simone approached them, all smiles, a large glass of wine in her hand. Tom hadn’t seen her this relaxed in ages. "We haven’t even cut the cake yet, and I promised Lara you’d come say hello." She looked at Tom expectantly as she talked and Bill frowned.

"Lara?" Bill asked. "You mean from school?"

"Yes," Simone said, her smile faltering. "You remember Lara, Tom. You took her to one of those school dances. I remember, we almost got you in a suit."

Tom fought the urge to roll his eyes. "That was years ago, Mom. I don’t know if I want to--"

"Oh! Here she is!" Simone cried out, grabbing a surprised looking girl and tugging her close. "Lara, we were just talking about the time Tom took you to that dance."

Lara blushed and ducked her head. "Oh, he… um, you probably don’t even remember," she said.

Tom could’ve killed his mother, but it was her birthday so he smiled through a grimace. It wasn’t the girl’s fault that his mother was crazy, and she was rather pretty. Of course, he wasn’t interested.

"Have a seat," Simone encouraged. "Bill, scoot over, sweetheart."

Bill stared up at Simone, confusion in his eyes, but moved away from Tom so Lara could sit between them.

"I remember the dance," Tom said, as she turned to him. "How have you been… um… doing?"

"Really good, almost done with school," Lara replied, a pink blush still very bright in her cheeks. "It hasn’t been the same without you. Both of you," she added quickly.

"God, school sucked," Tom said, laughing. "Seriously. How is… What was her name? Mrs. Bauer?"

"She is so fat," Lara giggled. "Oh! Well, she had a baby but no one could tell because…"

"Right, right," Tom said, smiling wide. He glanced over at Bill. His younger brother was staring at the floor, messing with the straw in his drink.

"Anyway, lots of girls are always asking me how you really are, what you’re like," Lara said. "And I’m like, I don’t know! It was years ago."

Tom started to remember that he did more than just dance with Lara. They had dated a bit, and he had actually liked her. "Nah, I’m the same," he said softly. "As always."

"Really?" She smiled and ducked her head demurely.

Bill heaved a sigh and stood up, and wandered out of the room. Simone watched after him, biting her lip.

Tom turned back to Lara and furrowed his brows. He’d liked Lara, but he had always loved Bill. "I’ll see you later," he said hastily to her, and he got up to follow his brother.

Bill made a beeline for the kitchen, sneaking out the backdoor, and Tom was just about to grab at the handle himself when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Tom…"

Tom turned to face his mother and cringed at the angry look on her face. She wasn’t smiling anymore and Tom almost felt ashamed for upsetting her on her birthday. But then he remembered why she was upset and he glared at her.

"What?"

"Can you just stay for a second?" Simone asked. "Please?"

"But, Mom, Bill is--"

"I’ll go talk to him," she said firmly. Tom tried to protest, but she held her hand up. "This is my birthday, please?"

Tom could only sigh. He didn’t want to give in, but he couldn’t quite bring himself to disagree with her. "Okay, but I’m not staying all night and don’t… Don’t say anything to Bill about…"

"Go back and talk to the girl," was all Simone said, and she gave Tom a look so stern that he just widened his eyes and turned around to go back. Simone sighed, she knew exactly what was going on. She knew she had little control over it, and she didn’t want to betray Tom by talking to Bill directly about the situation.

She needed to do something, though.

**

Simone crossed the lawn and walked into her house. It was dark and quiet, and she saw Bill’s shoes right in the foyer. She picked them up, out of habit, and then went upstairs to Bill’s room.

"Billy," she said softly, pushing the wooden door open. She saw that his bed was empty, and her chest tightened. Without another thought she went right to Tom’s room and pushed through the door.

Bill was curled up in Tom’s bed, tangled in the blankets, and his back was to Simone.

"Tomi?" he said quietly.

Simone sighed. "Bill."

"Mom?" Bill rolled over quickly and sat up, rubbing his face. His eyes were bloodshot and he looked tired, with his makeup smeared under his eyes. He got out of the bed and stood up, brushing himself off.

"Sit down, Billy." Bill’s shoulders sagged and he sat on the edge of the bed.

"Mind if I sit?" Bill shrugged and Simone joined him on the mattress. "What happened back there?" she asked carefully.

Bill looked away. "I wasn’t feeling well and I didn’t want to ruin your party."

"Bill, tell me the truth." She didn’t want to push him, but she needed to talk to her son. She needed things resolved, she needed to feel better about her relationship with Bill.

"Mom," Bill whined. "That Lara girl was a huge bitch to me in school, half of... most of the kids there were. It’s hard being around them." Bill knew it was only half of the truth, but he didn’t want to explain to his mother how seeing his brother with a girl upset him. He knew Tom didn’t want her, he was secure in that, he just didn’t like how his mother was throwing her at Tom.

"We need to talk, honey," Simone said after a few moments of uneasy silence.

"Why?" Bill asked. "What do you need to say?" He felt nervous and he didn’t know why, he just knew that he’d never seen his mother look at him like this before. She looked… sorry for him.

"You can’t get upset about Tom," Simone said, her voice even.

"Mom, that’s not it, I told you that I--"

"He’s not always going to be there for you!" Simone snapped. She tried to calm herself but she felt the emotions overwhelm her. "He’s going to have his own life, Bill! A family, a wife, children. And so are you! You two need to… move on."

Bill could only stare at her. "What?"

"I know you think you will always be together, but sweetie, that’s not how things are," Simone said. She put a hand on Bill’s shoulder and squeezed. "It’s a lovely notion, but it’s not realistic."

"Don’t say that," Bill said, feeling his eyes sting. He pulled away from his mother, holding a hand to his chest. "Tom’s not gonna…"

"You two will hurt each other, holding on like this," she said. "You can’t let him run your life."

Bill turned away from her, felt a tear on his cheek. "I love him," he whispered.

Simone stroked down his back and it made him feel sick. "Let’s go back, okay, sweetie?"

Bill cringed and shook his head. "Can’t. Sorry, Mom, but look at me. I can’t go back there. I’m too tired and…"

Simone looked at her son, he looked absolutely miserable and even though Simone wanted to be the one to push Bill to normalcy, she just couldn’t. Not that night. "Bill, I wish you’d reconsider. I only turn twenty-nine once," she said, nudging him.

Bill cracked a smile. "Happy Birthday, Mom."

Simone nodded, standing up and stroking Bill’s hair fondly. "I like this," was the last thing she said, meaning his hair. Bill just gave a weak smile.

She left, feeling unsettled and disappointed.

**

It was way past midnight when Tom was finally able to get away from the party. He tiredly went up to his bedroom, knowing Bill would be there. He saw that Bill was asleep on his bed, and his heart ached a little.

He lay down next to Bill, curling against him, and stroked his unruly black hair softly. Bill woke up instantly, turning his head and yawning in Tom’s face. "Mom?"

Tom wrapped his arms around Bill’s waist and squeezed. "It’s me, idiot."

"I knew you didn’t smell like Mom. You smell like Tomi."

Tom laughed and dipped his head, kissing Bill’s neck. "Are you okay? I tried coming after you, but Mom freaked and I tried to get back sooner, but…"

Bill cuddled closer. "I’m fine," he said. "Mom was just being weird."

"Weird?" Tom asked. "What did she say?"

"Ugh." Bill scooted even closer until they were belly to belly. "She said some shit about you getting married and leaving me."

Tom touched Bill’s lips against his own in the softest of kisses. "Bill…"

"But that’s not going to happen," Bill said. "I mean… right?"

Tom squeezed Bill hard against him. "I’m going to be with you always," he said, a fierce tone in his voice. "Don’t listen to Mom. She doesn’t get it. She doesn’t know."

"Maybe she does," Bill said. He pulled back from Tom a little. "Why would she tell me all of that? She… she yelled at me, Tomi. But she couldn’t know…"

Tom bit at his lip, feeling guilty. "Yeah, she just thinks… she doesn’t understand," he finished lamely.

Bill was silent for a moment and then he pressed his lips to Tom’s, immediately deepening the kiss into something intimate and passionate. Tom held onto him, choking down his guilt, and kissed him back.

When Bill pulled away he was sniffling. "She’s always going to be on our backs because she doesn’t know. Fuck, maybe it would be better if she did. Sure, she’d hate us, but she wouldn’t try to set you up with random girls right in front of me."

"She would," Tom said softly. He sat up a little and Bill stared up at him with questioning eyes. "Bill, I’ve gotta tell you something."

"You’re ending this? You’re leaving me?" Bill sat up, already hysterical. "Tom?"

"No, no, no," Tom said firmly, sitting up and touching Bill’s shoulder. "Of course not, Bill. Jesus."

"Well, I just thought…" Bill let out a long breath and looked at Tom with doleful eyes. "Fuck, I don’t know. Mom really shook me up."

Tom felt angry and he swallowed hard, trying to calm himself. "She’s wrong," he said. "And she should be fucking ashamed of herself for what she did to us tonight."

"I don’t know."

"I do," Tom replied. "She knows, Bill. She fucking knows about us."

Bill shook his head. "You’re just worried-"

"No, she knows. She’s talked to me about it a few times."

"What?" Bill frowned, his shoulders falling and he pulled away from Tom. "How?" He blinked, biting his lip. "How? When?"

"A while ago," Tom said quietly. "Little over a month, maybe. Probably longer. Are you okay?"

"Tomi…" Bill backed up until his shoulder blades hit the wall, and he was trembling slightly. "How did she find out?"

Tom wrinkled his nose. "I don’t think you really want to know…"

"Tell me."

"Last time when we were home for a break and we thought we were alone," Tom said softly. "We weren’t."

"Shit," Bill murmured. "Fuck. Fuck, Tom, what are we going to do?" Bill looked scared, he was shaking all over. "I can’t stay here, what does Mom think? She hates us, she has to. Oh, my god."

"She doesn’t," Tom said. "She’s just weirded out, you know? But she loves us."

"That’s why she wouldn’t call me before, right? Why she wouldn’t even stay near us…" Bill was about to start crying, but Tom pulled him close and kissed him soundly.

"Bill, you have to understand that she’d be upset and confused," Tom said as he pulled back. "But that doesn’t mean she can say those things to you."

Bill trembled in Tom’s arms. "I feel so ashamed, Tom."

Tom rocked Bill in his arms and hushed him. "Don’t feel that way about us, please. No one will understand, but it doesn’t mean it’s wrong."

"But it is wrong," Bill said. "It is."

"Bill…"

"You’re my brother, Tom. You’re not supposed to… I’m not supposed to… Jesus! You’re never going to be able to have a family."

Tom squeezed Bill so hard he squeaked. "Don’t say that," Tom said sharply. "You are my family. The only family I need."

"What about Mom?" Bill was sniffling and he felt so confused.

"Mom is going to have to learn to accept us," Tom said. Bill shook in his arms and Tom stroked all down his back. "Because I’m never going to be able to be just your brother. Never."

"Why didn’t you tell me sooner?" Bill asked, relaxing into Tom’s arms. "I don’t like that you kept this from me. It’s not fair."

Tom nuzzled Bill’s neck. "I’m so sorry, Bill. I could hardly handle it, I didn’t know what to do. And Mom was so angry, so upset. I didn’t want her to say to you what she said to me."

"What did she say to you?" Tom shook his head, but Bill grabbed his hands and forced Tom to look at him. "Tell me, Tomi."

"She thought I was hurting you, and making you… You know, she thought I was forcing you." Tom looked down. "I’m not, right?"

"Tom, shut up," Bill mumbled. "Of course not."

"She blamed me."

Bill wrapped his arms around Tom’s neck and kissed it. He was still trembling, still fighting off the urge to just sob loudly. "Tomi, I don’t know… I really want to get out of here. I want you to take me away. Can we go to a hotel?"

"Can you afford a hotel?" Tom tipped Bill’s face up and Bill wrinkled his nose. "We’re stuck here. Don’t worry, Bill. Mom won’t say anything to you, I made her promise."

"I wish she would. I think she was going to tonight."

Tom shook his head. "If she makes you feel the way she made me feel, I’ll seriously…"

Bill kissed Tom’s lips and nestled himself under Tom’s arm."Let’s go somewhere."

"We’ll have to face her eventually."

"Not tonight."

"She’s probably plastered, Bill. We won’t have to see her until tomorrow," Tom said. He did want to take Bill away, but he knew they had to stay. "I wish you didn’t know. I shouldn’t have told you."

"No, I want to know," Bill said. "I’m not mad that you didn’t tell me, but don’t keep things from me again, okay?"

Tom took a deep breath. "Um. Gustav knows."

Bill’s eyes widened. "What?"

"He didn’t say for sure, but it was obvious," Tom said quickly.

Bill groaned and fell back, covering his face with his hands. "I bet everyone knows, Tom. If Mom and Gustav do."

Tom didn’t know about that. He just pulled Bill against him again and stroked Bill’s back. "Don’t worry."

"Take me away," Bill whispered. "Just for now. We’ll come back and deal with everything later but right now, I just wanna go away with you."

"Bill…"

"Please." Bill curled up against Tom and buried his face in his brother’s chest. "Just say okay."

"Okay," Tom said quietly, closing his eyes. "Never going to leave you, Bill."

Bill nodded and pulled back, his brown eyes shiny and moist. "I wish I could sleep with you tonight."

"Probably a bad idea."

"I know." Bill frowned and stood, rubbing his arms up and down. "Fuck, it’s cold."

"You can take my blankets," Tom said.

Bill smiled a little. "Really?"

"Yeah, really." Tom stood up and piled his blankets in Bill’s arms and Bill hugged them close to his chest. "Christ, Bill."

"What?"

"I just…"

"I know." Bill leaned forward and kissed Tom softly. "Don’t keep things from me anymore, Tomi."

Tom touched Bill’s face tenderly. "I won’t. Now go to bed. We’re in a hotel tomorrow, and I’ll do whatever you want then, okay?"

Bill raised an eyebrow. "Anything?"

Tom nudged Bill away. "Yeah, but only if you go to sleep now."

Bill’s face brightened and he gave Tom one last peck on the lips. "Goodnight, Tomi."

Tom’s heart clenched as Bill turned, hugging the blankets to his chest. "Night, Bill."

**

Bill kicked his own blankets off the bed and lay down Tom’s. They felt softer than his own blankets, and he curled up in them, cuddling down and smelling Tom all around him.

Fuck the world, they were going to be okay no matter what.

Tom had said forever and Bill believed him. He snuggled deeper into the blankets and flicked off the lamp, the room plunging into darkness.

Bill didn’t know what forever felt like, but he thought it must be something warm and soft like this.

Knock, Knock 3/3

Sat, 01 Mar 2008 05:34:24 GMT

Title: Knock, Knock (3/3) *COMPLETE*
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: All it takes is a knock, and he's as good as laid.

Tom wakes up and the first thing he thinks is, Oh, shit.

His mouth tastes awful, and his limbs are sore – why is he so sore? He sits up and rubs at his head. He’d had a little to drink the night before. Not too much, though.

He’s not hung over. He stretches his arms and lets out a yawn, finally opening his mouth and wrinkling his nose. His tongue feels heavy, his lips feel dry. He turns to the side, arching his back a little, and he sees Bill.

Bill, nearly naked, fast asleep.

"Fuck…" Tom’s voice is just a whisper, but he claps a hand over his mouth. He stares hard at Bill. Everything from last night comes rushing back into Tom’s head. The texting, the flirting, the fucking. Tom swallows hard. He never actually sleeps with his one night stands.

But this wasn’t a one night stand, and it’s not just a groupie. It’s his baby brother Bill and he’s fucked him twice now.

Tom feels ill, staring at Bill. He sits up straighter, swallowing another lump down his throat. "Fuck, fuck," he murmurs. He gets out of the bed, untangling himself from the sheets and his face flushes. Of course he’s naked, why wouldn’t he be?

Tom shakes his head and stares down at Bill, so peaceful in sleep. Bill looks content, snuggled deep in the covers. He looks happy, relaxed… satisfied.

Tom’s groin aches, heat flaring up in his belly, and he has to leave the room. He pulls on a pair of boxers and rushes to the bathroom, turning on the shower and getting in as fast as he can. He scrubs at his skin, suddenly so conscious of how Bill had been all over him.

How he’d been all over Bill.

He winces at the memory, sliding into Bill, how tight his brother was around his cock, how vocal Bill was about his pleasure. Bill had loved it, that’s for sure.

And so had Tom.

Tom’s cock is possibly even harder than it had been the night before. He lets the water beat against his chest and he moans. Bill was absolutely the best fuck he’s ever had. And more than that…

Just being with Bill was a blast, both in and out of bed. Bill’s his baby brother, his best friend, his soul mate.

Tom squeezes his fists together and then lets his muscles relax. He knows what he has to do, though it makes his stomach drop and his hands tremble.

"Jesus," he hisses, and lets the water wash his thoughts away.

**

When Tom gets out of the shower he’s feeling calmer.

He comes out of the bathroom, a towel slung low on his hips, and he takes a deep breath. He’s got to deal with this.

The bed is empty, though. No Bill in sight.

Tom bites his lip and folds his arms. A tumble of emotions is swirling around in his belly – relief, guilt, confusion. Where did Bill go, and why? Well, he obviously went back to his room.

But why?

Tom sighs and sits on the edge of the bed, puts his head in his hands. His temples are throbbing and his knees feel a little shaky. He leans back and looks around. The room shows no sign of what went on last night. Tom’s about to forget it and get dressed when his eyes land on something.

One black silk stocking on the floor.

He sighs deeply and sits down on the bed. "Oh god, Bill," he murmurs, and grabs his phone from the bedside table. He holds it with trembling hands, so many feelings in him, and types out a sloppy text message.

i cant do this anymore we cant see each other again

He sends it and flops back on the bed, holding the phone in sweaty hands. After a few moments his phone vibrates and he opens it, scanning the message that was sent.

what do you mean it reads.

this is wrong, Tom types. there’s someone else

The moment he sends the message his heart begins beating harder in his chest. He sits up and stares at his phone, willing another message to come through. A few painful minutes pass before Bill’s message arrives.

who tomi

Tom smiles a little then, realizes that his brother doesn’t understand. Realizes that Bill doesn’t know they’re still playing, that he’s still the groupie. Tom’s still nervous as fuck, but he feels a bit calmer.

i cant tell you. you wouldn’t understand you would think its wrong. besides you dont even know me

The next message comes very fast. oh. but i thought u didnt believe in love?

Tom shakes his head. who says its love? he types, but then thinks better of it and erases the message. He can’t lie now. I believe now.

then who? i wont tell anyone i swear

He turns the phone over in his hands a few times, feeling ill, and then types out, its just not gona work between us – maybe ill see you sometime, bye.

Tom waits for another reply, but it never comes. He lets out a heavy breath and stands up on shaking legs. Breakups have never been hard for Tom, but this one feels strange. It weighs on him and he wants to take a long nap. He wants to hibernate.

He slowly gets dressed, wondering if he did the right thing. Groupies can get clingy, it’s best to let go of them before it gets too intense.

Tom grinds his teeth, chews the insides of his mouth. He feels restless and he needs to tell someone. He needs to get his feelings out, because he’s never really felt this before. He’s never wanted to be with someone more than once. He groans loudly. He’s so gone, so in over his head.

He puts on his shoes and walks out of his room, and straight down the hall.

Bill’s door is shut, and Tom feels ridiculous with his knuckles posed to knock. He’s on the other side of it now. Tom stands there, feeling kind of stupid. What the hell is he expecting? He doesn’t even really know what he wants. He just knows it involves Bill.

Tom decides not to knock; there’s never been a reason to knock before. There are no boundaries in their relationship anymore.

He pushes the door open to find Bill’s room empty. He steps inside and looks around. Bill’s bed is made and Tom knows why. He never slept in it.

Because he’d slept with Tom.

His eyes trail across the bed to a small pile of clothes on the floor. It’s Bill’s clothes from last night and he swallows hard. His eyes move from the clothes to a sliding glass door that opens up into a small balcony. He can just see Bill through the doors, leaning against the balcony railing and smoking a cigarette.

"Bill," he says, but his brother doesn’t seem to hear him. His feet move on their own accord and before he knows it, he’s pushing open the door and Bill turns and gasps.

"Tom," he says, smoke floating from his lips.

"I broke it off," Tom says. "It’s over."

Bill’s face drops and he closes his eyes. "I know, you told me."

"No, I broke it off with her," he says. He reaches a hand out and smoothes it down Bill’s chest. "Because I found someone else. Someone better."

"Who?" Bill asks, opening his eyes and staring hard at Tom. "Who else?"

"You, you idiot," Tom says.

Bill blinks and shakes his head. "But you told me…"

"I told her."

"But she’s… she’s me," Bill says, a flush creeping onto his face. "You broke it off with me."

"I want to start something with you," Tom says. "Just you. Though I wouldn’t mind you keeping the stockings."

Bill flushes a deeper shade of red. "God, you asshole," Bill says, smiling. Tom laughs and Bill hits him in the shoulder. "You nearly broke her heart, you know?"

"Really?" Tom asks.

Bill’s smile turns into something sly, something dangerous. He slinks forward and presses their cheeks together. "Yeah. She’s gonna be pissed that I stole her man, Tomi. You were her favorite. But you know what?"

Tom quirks up an eyebrow and grabs Bill around the waist.

"You’re my favorite, too," Bill says. And then they’re kissing, deep and wet and Tom thinks this has to be the best one so far.

He wraps his arms around Bill’s waist and pulls him forward, really kissing Bill like he deserves to be kissed. "Not playing anymore," Tom mumbles.

"No shit," Bill replies, a smirk in his voice and his tongue flickers against Tom’s lip ring. "I told you."

"Hm?" Tom gasps as Bill’s free hand wanders up Tom’s back, finds his neck and presses his nails in.

"I fucking told you," Bill says, "that you were in love with me."

Tom doesn’t answer, just kisses Bill harder and almost dips him. Bill nearly drops his cigarette and moans a little. Tom knows they’re risking being seen – the balcony is in clear sight of everything, so he tugs Bill into the shadows a bit, hiding them from the world.

Bill exhales and his breath tastes like smoke to Tom. Tom licks at their lips and swallows hungrily. It leaves a fresh taste in his mouth and he’s reminded of the past couple nights. Tom craves that closeness again. He pushes Bill against the outside wall and holds his wrists back. Bill squirms deliciously, laughing softly.

"What?" Tom asks quietly, dipping his head and smiling.

"You want me to put the stockings on?"

"No," Tom says. "’Cause today you’re Bill."

"Here’s a secret," Bill whispers. "I was Bill those other times, too."

"Christ, and here I thought I wasn’t fucking my brother."

Bill smacks Tom in the shoulder and takes a long drag from his cigarette, and then attaches his lips to Tom’s. Tom inhales the smoke in from Bill’s mouth and breathes it out of his nostrils, and they both wrinkle their noses. It burns pleasantly, the smoke between them.

"Yeah, you were, but…" Bill raises an eyebrow. "I didn’t want to ruin it for you."

Tom rolls his eyes. Bill is staring at him in a dangerous way, and his belly swirls. It’s Bill, just Bill, his little brother Bill. Tom swallows hard.

"Bill," Tom says softly. He dips his head forward and kisses Bill’s throat. "Are we going to do this? You and me?"

Bill smiles and wraps a leg around Tom’s. "You can’t be dumping me already, right?"

Tom can only laugh at this and kiss Bill again. God, he can’t get enough of him. He pulls back and says, "I was being serious, you ass."

"You like my ass," Bill says and Tom groans. Now that Bill’s being Bill there will be no end to the teasing. This makes Tom warm inside, he’s going to get his brother full on. "Of course we’re going to do this. We’ve already started. Are you worried?"

Tom nods. "You’re my brother."

"Oh, fuck that," Bill says. He takes a long pull on his cigarette and Tom’s cock throbs as he watches his brother’s mouth work the fag. "You’re ridiculously hot."

"Hotter than Georg?" Tom can’t help asking. Of course he’s joking, but he’s also curious.

Bill just rolls his eyes. "Whatever."

"Bill…"

"I don’t have to answer that."

"Yeah, you do," Tom says, pushing his groin against Bill. Bill gasps softly and his lips pout. "Bill…"

"So much hotter." Bill actually blushes, and it relieves Tom, that he still can make Bill turn red. "Jeez, Tomi."

Tom smiles and grinds his hips against Bill a little, enjoying the small sounds of frustration Bill is making. Tom knows they’re both hard, he can feel it, and he’s surprised at how aroused he is by Bill’s hard dick. He feels himself flush. He wants to grind against it.

"Tom," Bill murmurs. "Sit."

"What?"

"Sit," Bill says again, and he pushes Tom down on a chair. Tom is dumbfounded as he watches Bill get to his knees. Bill fumbles with Tom’s belt, clumsy fingers working the buckle. "Shit, shit."

Tom holds back a smile. Bill’s nervous. "My girl from last night could do that with one finger."

Bill narrows his eyes. "She was a slut."

"Big slut… I liked it," Tom replies. "No panties."

"What a whore." Bill glances up quick and his eyes flash, and Tom feels his belly swirl again. Bill manages to flick Tom’s belt open, and then he unzips Tom’s jeans.

"What are you going to do?" Tom asks shakily and Bill laughs.

Bill presses his hand against Tom’s clothed erection, moving his cigarette to his other hand carefully. "What does it look like?"

Tom grins. "It looks like you’re about to blow me, Bill."

Bill hums in his throat and slips his hand inside Tom’s pants. He grasps Tom’s dick and slowly pulls it out. His cock is red and already wet at the tip. This might be the most excited Tom’s ever been and he groans just looking at his brother holding him.

"I bet I give better head than her," Bill murmurs. Smoke rises between them and Tom reaches down to stroke Bill’s face.

"I don’t know about that, she was amazing," Tom says.

Bill’s eyes darken and he brings his cigarette to his mouth, sucking on it hard. Tom watches him and nearly screams as Bill lowers his mouth, exhaling wisps of smoke all over Tom’s dick before taking him in. Bill wastes no time in sucking Tom down, the smoke curling out still, and Tom’s knees shake.

His hands move up to grip at Bill’s soft hair and they both moan.

Tom stares down at his little brother and exhales, half expecting smoke to come trilling out of his own mouth. He rubs his finger behind Bill’s neck and encourages him forward, and Bill just smirks. Tom’s stomach plummets, how can someone be so devastating?

He smiles shakily and takes a few deep breaths. “You’ve done that before?” he asks casually.

Bill just shrugs and takes another drag. “Why do you say that?” He leans forward and exhales on Tom’s cock again, this time letting his tongue graze the head. The teasing is almost too much for Tom, he bucks his hips forward and fucks Bill’s mouth.

Bill gasps, but takes Tom in, licking around his dick deliciously and nearly dropping his cigarette. Tom’s got his fingers threaded crazily through Bill’s hair and he moves with Bill, sliding his hips forward and backward, letting Bill take him so deep that he kisses Tom’s hipbones.

Bill hums deep in his throat and pulls off. He lets his lips brush the head of Tom’s cock and he says, licking his lips, "Let’s not fuck around, I’ve blown quite a few guys."

"Ugh, Bill," Tom hisses out. "How many?"

Bill strokes Tom’s dick and takes one last suck on his cigarette before flicking it down. He takes Tom’s dick in again and lets the smoke curl out of his mouth. Tom watches the smoke disappear and Bill’s mouth work. This is the best blow job of his life, that’s for sure.

"Well, not that many," Bill says. He strokes Tom and places soft kisses around the head. "You, for one."

"Mmm. And do you like it?"

"Your dick?" Bill smiles wide and sucks Tom down. Tom’s hips rock up and he thrusts into Bill’s mouth with a ragged groan. Bill’s good, almost too good. Tom knows that Bill has blown more than “a few guys” but he’s also pretty confident that Bill has never blown anyone quite like this.

Bill wraps his fingers around the base of Tom’s cock and squeezes, and Tom cries out. “You never answered,” he manages.

“Hm.” Bill pulls back and gazes up at Tom. “Yeah, I like it.”

“How much?”

Bill dips forward and licks a hot stripe under Tom’s dick. Tom’s back arches involuntarily and a strange, strangled sound escapes his lips.

“Too much,” Bill replies, smiling wickedly. He squeezes Tom’s cock again, and rolls his fingers down the length. Tom craves Bill’s mouth and he nudges Bill’s chin with his cock. Bill raises his eyebrows and breathes hotly, right against the slit. Tom bites his lip, trembling. No girl has ever made Tom tremble before, not even close, and Bill’s got him begging.

Tom’s belly starts to heat up, and his toes are tingling. Bill’s drawing all his energy out and he feels exhausted, he just wants to come. Bill is teasing and pulling and resisting. “Oh, fuck, Bill,” Tom murmurs. “Just kill me already.”

Bill wrinkles his nose and swallows Tom’s cock down whole, and Tom cringes. It’s so fucking good, Tom knows he can’t take much more. His belly aches with arousal and everything feels hot, his limbs are tingling.

He feels Bill’s long nails against the base of his cock, scratching and tickling. "Mmm," Bill moans around Tom’s dick, and it’s all too much. Tom grunts, arching up and coming. He comes hard and Bill lets him go, his come spurting across Bill’s lips and chin.

"Oh, fuck, sorry," Tom says breathlessly, but Bill’s lips twitch up and his tongue laps at his lips. "Ugh, Bill, you liked that."

Bill smears the come off his chin and sucks at his fingers. "You gave me a facial, Tom."

"You liked it," Tom says again. "Fuck, get up here."

Bill licks at his lips once more and then slides up into Tom’s lap. "Fuck me," Bill demands and kisses Tom deep. So deep that Tom’s head falls back and thunks against the chair. "Tom. Just me. Fuck just me."

"Here?" Tom croaks. Bill rocks against him and mewls. "Out here?"

"Anywhere," Bill says and their mouths meet again.

“Fuck,” Tom groans. “Yeah, you’re gonna kill me. Just get it over with.”

Bill shakes his head, squirming and writhing in Tom’s lap. Tom grabs Bill’s hips and grinds them against his cock, and he knows he can get it up again because Bill is the hottest little thing he’s ever had on his dick.

He pulls Bill’s shirt off and tosses it to the side. “Want you naked,” Tom mumbles.

“No skirt?”

“No,” Tom says resolutely. He wants to deal with Bill, just Bill. The thought almost ends him. He licks down the center of Bill’s chest and drags his hands against Bill’s nipples. Bill moans loudly. “I still think you’ve got amazing tits, though.”

“Shut up,” Bill says, grinning and rolling his eyes. Then he blushes a little. “Thanks, though.”

Tom just nods seriously. He feels Bill up some more, rubbing his back, just enjoying the bare skin. Bill’s moving around, his jeans are rubbing Tom’s cock almost raw. “Get them off,” Tom whispers. “Seriously, I gotta have you naked.”

Bill’s eyes flash and he wiggles out of his jeans without even unzipping. He stands and slides his pants and boxers off, and modestly covers himself. Tom just laughs, but feels nervous again. Bill has a cock, and even though he’s covering it with bashful, manicured hands, Tom can tell Bill is extremely hard.

“Sit down,” is all Tom can manage, and Bill takes a tentative step forward.

Bill’s face reddens and he moves his hands, all cockiness gone, and his hard, slender cock is exposed. "Oh god," Bill says. Tom wraps a hand around Bill’s thigh and beckons him closer. "Tomi, don’t look at it."

Bill’s dick is all Tom is looking at. It’s long and smooth, and he runs his palm along it gently. "Bill…"

"Tomi, do you like it?" Bill looks down, watches Tom touch him.

Tom holds his brother’s cock, fists him for real and Bill squeaks. "Very nice," Tom says. "Now get down here."

He tugs Bill closer by his dick and soon he has a lap full of him, their cocks touching just like their lips. "Oh Christ," Bill moans out. "Oh fuck."

“That’s amazing,” Tom murmurs, grinding his hips slightly, rubbing their erections together. “Oh fuck, that’s good.”

“I’m not a girl,” Bill says softly.

“I know.”

Bill smiles and Tom kisses him hard, pushing their lips together desperately. Bill rocks back and forth in Tom’s lap and Tom feels himself start to get hard again, all he needed was a nudge from Bill. They grind together slowly, relishing this new sensation, and Tom finds himself smoothing his hand down Bill’s back, down to his ass, and down between the crease. He sneakily bumps Bill’s hole with a forefinger, and Bill gasps, shocked.

“Oh fuck, I forgot about that, oh Tom,” Bill moans, writhing uncontrollably just from the simple touch. Tom grins, he feels so confident again, because he knows how to get Bill off this way. He knows he can make him scream his head off. “Tom, do it. Touch it, I need it.”

“Beg for it,” Tom replies quietly, positioning his finger at Bill’s hole.

“Please, please,” Bill almost whimpers, his eyes closed. “You’re so good, so good, Tom.”

“More?” Tom tickles just outside of Bill’s entrance.

“Tomi, Tomi,” Bill moans softly. “Push it in, please.”

Tom doesn’t make Bill wait anymore, he pushes his finger in and a high pitched squeak escapes Bill’s lips.It’s dry but he can tell that Bill doesn’t mind. Bill grips at his shoulders and presses down hard.

"Shit, shit." Bill squirms, his thigh bumping Tom’s cock.

"God damnit, you’re so tight," Tom says. He crooks his finger and Bill trembles hard. "There?"

"Yes," Bill grits out. "Yes. Fuck. Gotta take me inside, Tom."

"Let’s just do it right here, no one can see us," Tom says. "Just let me."

"You’ll rip me in half," Bill says. "Lube. C’mon, Tomi."

Bill wraps his legs around Tom’s waist and clings, and Tom just laughs and tries to stand up. Bill is heavy but Tom can manage the weight. He carries Bill inside and they tumble onto Bill’s made bed. Immediately Tom kicks his jeans and boxers off his legs and kisses Bill hard.

“Your fucking shirt,” Bill groans, getting lost under Tom’s sleeves. “Get it off.”

Tom leans back and looks at Bill expectantly. Bill just smiles and kneels, pulling Tom’s shirt off and nuzzling his face against Tom’s chest. “So nice,” he murmurs, and licks at Tom’s nipple. “Yum.”

“Weird,” Tom says, and Bill pushes against Tom, forcing them both down on the mattress. They grind together for a few moments, and Tom is on cloud nine. Bill’s naked body is the best thing he’s felt against his skin, so hot and soft and lithe. He runs his fingers up and down Bill’s frame, just touching.

Tom sits up and pulls Bill into his lap, and their chests touch. “Back to this,” Tom says. He grips Bill’s ass and Bill cries out, grinning.

“What, you like my ass?” Bill asks.

“Love this,” Tom replies, pushing a dry finger right inside Bill. Bill shakes and clutches at Tom’s shoulders, dropping his head into Tom’s neck and biting softly. Tom gasps and his finger curls, itching Bill’s spot. Bill bites down harder, groans a little. His hair is all over Tom’s neck and shoulders.

"Can’t take anymore," Bill cries out. "Now, Tomi, please."

Tom pushes Bill back against the mattress and runs his hands all down Bill’s little body. Bill shivers, moving against the feeling. "Where’s the lube?"

Bill reaches over and grabs his makeup bag. "Open it."

Tom dips his hands into the bag and finds the tube, twisting the cap off and immediately covering his fingers with the slick substance. "Spread your legs."

“Just like that?” Bill asks, his lips curling into an amused smile. “I’m not just a dumb groupie, Kaulitz.”

Tom makes a face. “But I’m your favorite.”

“Maybe.”

“Come on, spread your legs,” Tom says, smirking. “You’re aching for it.”

Bill’s cheeks flush. “I didn’t even ask you to go down on me.”

“That groupie did,” Tom replies.

“She was a huge slut.”

"Do you want me to?" Tom asks. "Because I will."

"Tom, whatever gets you in me faster," Bill says.

Tom grins and presses a finger into Bill. "Later, now…" He shoves another inside and Bill gasps and shakes. "I just wanna fuck."

"I want what you want," Bill says. "All of it."

“That’s what she said.”

Bill smacks Tom in the shoulder but then he moans as Tom pushes his fingers deeper inside. “Oh, Tomi…”

“You like that?” Tom sighs and nearly lifts Bill up, his fingers are so snug inside Bill. “I think you like that a lot… Maybe you’re sluttier than she was.”

“I don’t think-” Bill moans louder than before. “…so… Oh, god. Your dick now. Now, please.”

Tom kisses Bill’s neck. “You sound a lot like her.”

“I bet.” Bill narrows his eyes at Tom and bounces a little on his fingers, making himself moan. “I’m ready, I’m ready…”

Tom’s groin aches at the words and he pulls his fingers out, Bill groaning with the loss. "I’m going to fuck you."

"Again," Bill says.

Tom slicks up his cock and kneels between Bill’s legs. "For the first time," he corrects. "Scoot down."

Bill bites at his lip and scoots down on the bed, Tom’s cock bumping against his hole. "Put it in."

Tom holds his dick and rubs it up and down Bill’s crease. "If I come in… ten seconds, please don’t judge me," Tom says. He eases the head inside and Bill curses. "Jesus, you’re squeezing the shit out of me."

"Don’t you dare come," Bill says. He pulls at his hair and pushes his hips up. "No matter how bad you want to." He squeezes Tom with his muscles and Tom’s head falls forward, his shoulders slumping.

"Oh… my god, you’re so…"

Bill’s hand reaches between their legs and he holds the base of Tom’s cock tight. "I won’t let you come. Not yet." He grinds down and moans, his head falling back and Tom can’t help but pull back and thrust in, his balls slapping against Bill’s ass harshly.

Bill moans, writhes, and keeps his hold on Tom’s penis. Tom really wants to come, and he might. He holds it, though, pulls back and sinks back in, thrusting and grunting. Bill squeezes around him tightly, and then lets go, and keeps up the delicious cycle. Tom has no idea how long he can last, not when Bill has such an amazing hold on his cock.

Tom pulls Bill close, holds him tight and barely lets him move. Bill fights this, he squirms around and gasps, but Tom finally has him. Tom moves slowly in and out, torturing Bill. Bill is a mess; he’s not in control anymore so he’s completely submissive under Tom now.

“Tom, let me go, let me go,” Bill whines. He scratches at Tom’s back, it just makes Tom want to come harder.

“Keep fighting,” Tom whispers. “You have no idea how good you look.”

“On your dick.” Bill’s tone is sassy. “You’re so proud, Tomi.”

“Yeah, I should be,” Tom replies lowly, his voice just a low growl in the back of his throat. “I’ve got you.”

Bill manages to let out a breathy laugh and then he groans. His cock is rubbing against Tom’s belly. Tom reaches down and grabs onto it, playing with the new piece of Bill he’s not explored yet, thumbing the head. Bill almost screams, and Tom raises his eyebrows. “Good?” he asks.

Bill can’t even answer. He just nods, his head rolling back, his long, slender throat exposed.

"Your cock is so hard," Tom says.

"And you like it?" Bill gasps out.

"Yes, better than a girl," Tom says. He clenches his jaw and bats Bill’s hands away, catching them and holding them up above his head. "You’re way better than a girl."

Bill shivers and his legs wrap around Tom’s body. "And you’re better than Georg."

Tom growls and begins plowing into Bill with all he has in him. Bill meets his every thrust, his hips rolling and his ass squeezing Tom so hard they both scream out.

"Gonna come, soon," Tom says. He thrusts harder and harder and Bill wails.

"Make me come," Bill whines. "Touch me."

Tom holds Bill’s dick and humps forward, kisses Bill’s face, chest, neck, and then his lips. The kiss is deep and biting and Bill yells into it, his cock throbbing in Tom’s hand.

"Fuckin’ love you," Tom says. Bill’s toes curl and he comes, hard and hot all over Tom.

“I told you,” Bill moans, desperately bucking his hips still, squeezing around Tom and writhing. “Oh god, Tomi, I know.”

Tom thrusts deep inside Bill and holds it, grimacing, he can feel his orgasm so close. “Talk to me,” he says.

“What? Oh,” Bill breathes. “God, Tom, I don’t know… Your dick feels so big, I can’t… I can’t…”

“More.”

Bill’s eyes darken, he smiles lazily. “You know I love-“

Tom groans loudly and comes hard inside Bill with such force that his cock pops out and he comes on Bill’s thighs and stomach, too. Bill gasps and arches into it, reaching down and rubbing himself. Tom breathes heavily, collapses on Bill and buries his face in Bill’s neck. For a few moments there are no words, just satisfied breaths and sighs.

"That was so…" Bill curls close to Tom and kisses the top of his head. "Tomi, god…"

Tom holds Bill down to the mattress, and bites at his throat. "Can we do it again?"

Bill barks out a laugh. "Tom, I’m not some horny little groupie you can just fuck whenever you want."

Tom lifts off of Bill, looks down at him and caresses his cheek. "Then what are you?"

"I’m your horny little brother you can just fuck whenever you want," Bill says.

"That’s going to be a time saver," Tom says. "And just so you know, Bill, for future reference…"

"Hmm?"

He kisses Bill’s lips. "You don’t have to knock."

Don't Tell Mom (11/?)

Wed, 27 Feb 2008 07:38:12 GMT

Title: Don't Tell Mom (11/?)
Previous Chapters: Here
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17 <
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: What Mom doesn't know won't kill her.

It was dark in the bus, and Tom was mostly sleeping, the bus lulling him in and out of consciousness. He rolled over and relaxed against the mattress, they’d had a very long day. It was all interviews, television appearances, and photo shoots.

He was just about to fall into a deep sleep, one that he needed, when the curtain on his bunk was tugged open.

“Ugh,” he moaned, and Bill crawled into his bed.

“Tom?” Bill immediately snuggled under the covers, moving all over Tom. “Tom, are you mad at me?”

Tom sat up a little and touched Bill softly behind the ear, something that always calmed his brother. He curled his fingers around Bill’s ear and stroked. “What?”

“You’ve been weird,” Bill said. “Since home. Mom too, actually. You… haven’t touched me.”

“I’m touching you,” Tom said. “It’s been stressing, and we’ve both been tired, right?”

“It’s more than that,” Bill replied softly. “It never mattered before if you were tired, we were tired together.”

“I’m really tired,” Tom said, frowning. “Actually tired, you know?”

He touched Bill’s hair, longer now, and sighed. Bill just drew back a bit, awkwardly.

“Is it a girl?” Bill asked. “Did you mess up again? Just tell me, I won’t be mad, I promise.”

“It’s not a girl.”

“What is it?” Bill’s tone was bordering on childish, whining. Tom pulled him close and rubbed his back. “It’s you and Mom, you both have been weird.”

Tom looked at Bill sharply. “What about Mom? What did she say?”

“Nothing,” Bill said. “That’s just it. She hasn’t said anything because she won’t talk to me.”

“What?” Tom began to feel angry.

“I called her this Monday, because I do every week. It’s our thing, right? She didn’t pick up. That has never happened, Tom, she always picks up when I call her on Mondays,” Bill said, looking crestfallen. “She’s never missed a week and now I feel like I did something because you’re both being so weird to me.”

Tom’s heart almost broke, just looking at Bill. Bill looked so small and vulnerable, his lower lip trembling a bit. Tom felt angry at his mother; she didn’t need to punish Bill, not for this.

“I think she’s been busy, with the gallery,” Tom said. He curled close to Bill, opened his arms and cuddled him. Bill sighed in pleasure and cuddled back. “She isn’t mad, she’s fine.”

Bill pressed his face against Tom’s neck and kissed it gently. “Tomi, she didn’t even really say goodbye. She didn’t. She wouldn’t look at me and she was hardly home. I don’t know…”

“Mom has a life, too,” Tom said kindly. “She’s been working like crazy, you know.”

“I know,” Bill whined. “But… You’re not mad then?”

Tom smiled and kissed Bill’s forehead. “No, don’t be silly.” He felt awful for making Bill think that he was angry, and held him tightly, tried to make up for it. He knew he’d have to try harder, to shake himself out of the funk he’d been in.

The rest of their trip home had been strange. For Tom, knowing what he knew, he’d felt intensely awkward around both Bill and his mother. He’d barely spent time with Bill, barely even looked at him. With his mother, he couldn’t even meet her eyes. Gordon and Bill remained clueless, ignorant of the tension between Tom and Simone.

Tom had been counting down the minutes until they could leave, and Simone had made herself scarce. Suddenly the gallery was busy, and she had to be away from home all the time. It suited Tom fine.

He’d explained to Bill that they should sleep in their own beds for the rest of the visit. Tom fabricated a little lie, saying he’d seen Gordon staying up later than usual and didn’t want to take any chances. Bill had been cooperative.

“It’s been so long,” Bill whispered. “Now that I know you aren’t mad, I guess you just think I’m ugly or something.”

“If you’re ugly, so am I,” Tom joked. Bill smacked him gently in the arm, and they both laughed softly.

“Guess I should go,” Bill said dully.

“Stay a little,” Tom said. “It’s pretty early.”

Bill smiled. “Now you want me around?”

“I always do, don’t be an idiot,” Tom told him, kissing Bill’s jaw. “I’m not mad, don’t worry. And Mom’s just busy, she’d have to be to ignore you.”

Bill just nodded, satisfied for the moment. Tom breathed a soft sigh of relief. He’d have to fix this, somehow.

**

Tom picked up his phone and squinted at it. It was late, and everyone was already asleep on the tour bus. He was in the lounge, having just left his brother in his bunk, and he felt incredibly restless. Tom knew what he had to do, he had rehearsed it in his head all day, but now he had no idea of what to say.

Without another thought he dialed a familiar number with shaking fingers.

"Hello?" said a tired voice.

"Mom," Tom said quietly.

There was silence on the other end, and Tom bit his lip. "Mom?" he tried again.

"Yes," Simone replied curtly.

Tom sighed. "Mom, come on."

"What is it?"

"I'm sorry," Tom said, looking up at the open door. "I'm really, really sorry. I never wanted… I mean… It never…"

"Tom…"

“You can’t punish Bill over this,” Tom said. He twisted a lock of hair tightly around his finger, pulling until his scalp stung. “It’s my fault.”

Simone sighed over the line. “I was wrong to blame you like I did,” she said.

“No,” Tom whispered. “Blame me. Not Bill. You can hate me.”

“I don’t hate you,” Simone said, her voice full of some emotion Tom couldn’t quite discern. She sounded tired, angry… old. “I could never hate you.”

“You gotta call him, it’s killing him,” Tom said.

“And he doesn’t know?” Simone asked quickly.
Tom bit at his lip. “No,” he said, closing his eyes. “I… can’t.”

“I love you,” Simone said weakly. “Know that. It’ll be okay.”

“How?” Tom said, feeling tears prick at his eyes. “How can it be okay? No one was ever supposed to know.”

“No one else can,” she said. “You’ve got to be careful, Tom. So careful. Promise me you’ll be careful.”

“We always are,” Tom said.

“Not careful enough.”

Tom swallowed hard. “I will. We will.”

There was a short beat of silence and Simone cleared her throat. “You’ve always liked girls.”

“It’s only ever been Bill,” Tom said immediately. “I promise you that.”

“But how? Can’t you stop? He’s your brother, Tom. He’s my son,” she said. “Please, Tom.”

Tom shook his head, tugging on his hair harder. “I love him,” he said. “I just do, always, from the beginning, from the very beginning. And I--”

There was a soft click of a door opening outside the lounge and Tom cursed.

“Mom, I’ve got to go.”

“Tom, don’t--”

“I love you,” he said. She sighed, maybe to respond in kind, but Tom had already hung up the phone. The door to the lounge creaked open and Bill popped his head inside, his hair messy and full of static.

“Tomi? Why are you awake?” he asked sleepily. Tom put the phone down and sighed.

“Come over here.”

Bill made a face, but went to sit beside Tom anyway. Tom pulled him close, Bill’s leg falling over his. “Bill.”

They pressed their noses together softly. “What is it?” Bill asked.

Tom shook his head and kissed Bill. “Nothing.”

**

"She said she misses us, me especially," Bill was saying, smiling and raising his eyebrows.

Tom sighed with relief. "Well, yeah, of course she does."

Bill rolled to the side, dropping his phone on the bed. He'd just gotten off the phone with Simone, and his mother had behaved, said all the right things, put an easy smile back on Bill's face. Tom felt an enormous weight lift from his shoulders.

"Tomi," Bill whispered. "What's wrong?"

Tom looked at Bill, saw the confused expression, and forced a brilliant smile. "Nothing. I told you she was just busy."

"Yeah, she said she had some good sales at the gallery," Bill replied.

Tom nodded, knowing there were no sales, good or otherwise. "Sure. She gets all crazy when stuff like that happens, you know."

"I miss home," Bill said softly, resting his chin on Tom's chest. "And her."

"I've got you," Tom said quietly, kissing Bill's forehead. He couldn't miss home, not when he felt so much more freedom out on the road, where he could be with Bill so much easier. Home had never felt free to him, or safe. Always tense.

Bill rolled onto his back and wrinkled his nose. "She said she's sending us something. I hope I can eat it."

"I'm glad she called you," was all Tom said. He pulled Bill to his chest and kissed between his shoulder blades, and Bill let out a low squeal.

Tom couldn't relax, though. He felt uneasy, he'd never forget how Simone made him feel, and he made a promise to himself, to make sure that Bill never found out and felt that way, too.

But how could he keep it to himself? How long could he? He told Bill everything, and he knew this ordeal with their mother was far from over. She was still upset, would always be upset, and Tom didn’t blame her.

Tom wasn’t stupid, he knew what Bill and he were doing was considered wrong, that it probably was wrong. But that didn’t mean he could stop, even if he’d wanted to. They were too connected, they were each other’s lives. Tom could never pull away, could never push Bill away.

Just thinking about losing Bill made his palms sweat and his heart beat erratically. No one, not even their own mother, had ever been there for Bill like Tom had. And no one had ever been there for Tom like Bill had. They grew up with only each other to rely on, had grown up falling in love with each other. It took years, but they fell into it and now there was no way out.

Tom wondered, as he held Bill close to him, feeling Bill slowly slipping into sleep, if any of this would have happened had their father never left. No, Tom knew that their father leaving had nothing to do with it. It was better when he left.

They were meant to be, he decided. And if they were meant to be, no one could stop them. No one could tell fate to fuck off. It wasn’t a mistake.

It was meant to be and Tom didn’t care how hard he’d have to work to keep it. He would have Bill always.

**

The music beat loudly all around Tom and he stood at the bar, leaning back on his elbows, slowly sipping his drink. It was heavy, mostly alcohol, entirely too much for him to handle. His world was becoming blurry, and his belly felt warm as he watched Bill on the dance floor.

Bill was smiling, laughing, grinning, and moving spasmodically around on the floor, dancing to the beat and jumping around everyone. Georg was near him, pushing and pulling Bill, and they were having a blast. Gustav stepped up next to Tom and nodded.

"Disgusting," Gustav remarked, nodding toward Georg and Bill.

"Jealous," Tom replied, laughing a little. His head felt heavy and he just wanted to grab Bill and rub against him. His stomach swirled as he saw a girl move right up to Bill, and Bill laughed and grabbed her waist.

He knew it didn’t mean anything, that Bill was just having fun, but some weird emotion still stirred in his belly. Jealousy. Tom laughed a little, he almost liked feeling possessive like this over Bill. It was a normal emotion and he took a drink and looked at Gustav.

“Maybe we should go get them before they make complete asses of themselves,” Tom said.

Gustav took a long gulp of his beer. “Jealous?”

“I could snatch her away from Bill in a second,” Tom said, grinning.

“I didn’t mean that,” Gustav said. He emptied his bottle and then turned back to the VIP section they had been sequestered in all evening. “Gonna head up there.”

He gave Tom one last look and disappeared up into the booth. Tom looked back down at the dance floor, Georg was leaving Bill alone, going back up to the VIP section, too. It was just Bill and a pretty redhead, now.

Tom sighed and continued to watch. Bill was moving against the girl, laughing, gripping her hips and he had one leg between her thighs. Tom tried to look away, he tried to ignore the stirring in his belly. He had to watch, though. He'd never seen Bill in action like that, he'd never even thought about it. A part of him was fascinated.

An even bigger part of him wanted Bill for his own, and fast.

Tom wondered if this was how Bill felt when Tom was with girls, and he immediately looked away. He glanced at the VIP section and decided to join Gustav up there, he saw that Georg was on his way, too. Could he leave Bill on the floor like that?

He saw that Bill's face was buried in the girl's neck and decided yes, he could leave Bill.

"Another drink for you?" Gustav asked when Tom arrived. Tom slid into the booth and nodded, downing the last sip of his drink.

"You're paying?" Tom cracked a smile.

"Yup. What's the matter, couldn't take it down there?" Gustav gave Tom a lopsided smile.

Tom knew what Gustav was implying, and he felt a little itchy. "All the hot girls left."

Gustav just nodded, looking unconvinced. Georg started laughing. "What?" Gustav said, looking irritated.

"Did you see Bill? He was like… fucking her on the floor. Or something." Georg pounded the table, shaking his head. "Didn't think he had it in him."

"He doesn't," Tom said bluntly without thinking. He stood up again. “You know… I might go back.”

Gustav laughed and Tom flipped him off.

“I’ll be right back,” he said, and trotted down the steps to the small dance floor. He stood awkwardly at the side of the floor for a few moments, spotting Bill in the crowd of people and just watching. He had to admit that he liked watching Bill with the girl. It was different, hot even. His cock stirred in his pants and he could clearly see Bill’s hands slide down to the girl’s ass.

Bill didn’t squeeze her ass, smack it, or anything crude. He held it and laughed into her neck.

The girl was all smiles, very pretty, prettier than Tom had realized, and he was fine with it until she lifted her head up and kissed Bill softly on the very edge of his mouth. Tom knew he shouldn’t be mad, he’d slept with girls before, messed around, but something didn’t feel right about this anymore.

He hadn’t been with a girl in ages, hadn’t been able to, even at Bill’s insistence. His chest ached and before he knew what he was doing, he found himself in the middle of the dance floor, so close to Bill that he could smell his sweat.

He touched Bill just between the shoulder blades and Bill craned his neck back, smiling softly at Tom.

“Hm?” Bill hummed.

“You should come back up.”

"You should stay down here," Bill replied. "This is Ana, she's really nice."

"Hey," said the girl, Ana, and Tom simply smiled back. Ana's eyes flashed and Tom knew the word threesome was on her mind.

"Hey," he said. "We're not doing this. Bill?"

"Tomi, go away, let me be," Bill said, frowning. "Go talk about sports with Gustav."

"Ugh," Tom groaned. He took Bill by the arm and tugged, feeling jealousy rip apart his insides. Yes, it was hot to think about Bill with a girl, but this girl was aggressive. Too aggressive. Bill yelped and let himself be pulled, he even stashed himself just under Tom's arm.

"Can I go with you guys?" Ana asked.

Tom shook his head. "We're VIP," he said, feeling like a snob, but it was an easy out. He dragged Bill away, and Bill waved to her, gulping the last of his drink.

"Tomi, Tomi, Tomi," Bill whispered, stumbling over his feet as Tom pulled him up to the more exclusive section. "Ouch, you're holding me too tight."

"Bill," Tom said, rolling his eyes. Bill was drunker than he was, much drunker. How did that happen? Tom helped Bill up the steps and then they were at the booth that Georg and Gustav were at.

"Gentlemen!" Bill cried, shoving himself into the corner of the booth.

Georg lifted his glass in greeting and Gustav belched. “You guys are really classy,” Tom said, following Bill into the booth. He scooted closer to Bill than he normally would in public, but didn’t care. Something, perhaps the itching jealously at his back, was making him crave a sudden closeness with his twin.

“I… am a gentleman,” Georg slurred. “Bill said so.”

Tom rolled his eyes and put a soft hand on Bill’s thigh under the table. “Sure, you are.”

Bill giggled and pressed in even closer.

“So, strike out with that girl?” Gustav asked. Tom watched him, he didn’t seem nearly as drunk as Georg and was eyeing them a bit warily. Tom knew he should scoot away from Bill, but his hand clutched at Bill’s thigh tighter and Bill squealed.

“No!” Bill said. “Tomi took me away from her. Jealous, jealous, Tomi.” Bill flicked Tom’s nose, laughing dangerously close to his face.

“She must’ve been hot,” Georg said. “For Tom to get jealous.”

“She was,” Tom shot back. Bill smiled wide and rested his head on Tom’s shoulder.

“Tomi, get me a drink,” Bill murmured.

“I think he’s had enough,” Gustav said. “I think we all have.”

“Spoilsport,” Georg sang out. “You haven’t had enough!”

Gustav snorted, looking into the crowd. “I think I see Saki down there, I’ll see if we can get the car.”

All three boys groaned as Gustav left.

“No fun,” Bill said, right into Tom’s neck. Tom shivered as Bill’s lips brushed against his skin and he glanced at Georg. Georg was now face first down on the table, his hand still clutching his beer.

“He isn’t watching,” Bill said, pressing the softest of kisses to Tom’s throat. “Jealous, Tomi.”

“No way,” Tom murmured, pulling away, testing the resistance. Bill followed, and Tom’s stomach flared a bit. Bill’s lips attached back onto Tom’s neck, and his tongue grazed his collarbone. Tom let out a soft sigh and leaned into Bill, moving his hand up Bill’s thigh and pressing softly against the surprising hardness at Bill’s groin.

“Uh uh,” Bill whispered. “You don’t get that. Not now.”

Tom groaned and squeezed Bill’s cock lightly, and Bill squirmed, pressing his lips right against Tom’s. Tom nearly choked, he couldn’t believe Bill was kissing him in public. Tom wanted to pull away, wanted to smack Bill in the shoulder, scream at him, but for all the worry, he was extremely turned on. Being public was something the twins were never allowed to do, and it thrilled Tom a little.

Tom put his hand on the back of Bill’s neck and stroked, and Bill pushed his tongue between Tom’s lips and licked behind his teeth. Tom moaned, he loved that. He closed his eyes, forgetting about everything, and pushed Bill against the vinyl seats. Bill’s hands flew down Tom’s chest and clutched around his waist, and their tongues met.

“Fuck,” Tom mumbled right against Bill’s lips, and Bill silenced him with an aching kiss. Tom’s cock was almost bursting, he was so hard, and he needed to get in Bill. It was the only thing on his mind. “Bill, oh, Bill…”

“Mmm,” Bill hummed, nearly sitting in Tom’s lap. Tom heard a loud snap, and he turned around, seeing that Georg had slammed his beer on the table and was lifting his head up. Gustav had just appeared.

Gustav had his eyebrow raised. “Car’ll be here soon.”

“Oh,” Tom said, casually as he could manage. He shoved Bill off him, trying to make it look playful. Bill gave him an annoyed look, but Tom nodded sharply toward Gustav, and Bill paled a little.

“Can I get one of these to go?” Georg groaned, holding up his beer.

**

The car ride was tense, though Tom felt like Gustav and he were the only ones who realized it. Georg was passing in and out consciousness in his seat and Bill was talking up a storm to no one.

“I really don’t want to go back to the hotel,” Bill was saying. “It’s gross, I swear. So gross. There was dirt in the tub. Was there dirt in your tub, too, Tomi?”

Tom was watching Gustav from the corner of his eye, trying to figure out what his friend had and hadn’t seen.

“Tomiiiii!”

He turned to Bill. “Huh?”

Bill smiled and leaned forward, very close to Tom. “You weren’t listening.”

Tom couldn’t help but steal a glance at Gustav. He was staring out the window. “Sorry,” Tom said to Bill. Bill propped his chin up on Tom’s shoulder. “Um…”

“Naughty Tomi,” Bill whispered before ducking his head and biting Tom’s shoulder affectionately. Tom nudged Bill back and Bill pouted. “Tomi, when we get back…” He wiggled his eyebrows.

“You better get some sleep,” Gustav interrupted. “Big show tomorrow, interviews in the morning.”

“But I don’t wanna sleep,” Bill said. He stared straight at Tom. “I feel very awake.”

“I bet you do.” Tom tried to laugh it off, tried to shrug and stare out the window like Gustav was doing, but Bill was clinging to his side and practically breathing down his neck. Tom liked it – a lot. His problem was, he wasn’t sure if he could hide how much he liked it. Gustav was all eyes and ears, it seemed.

“Maybe I’ll just…” Bill scooted closer to Tom and squeezed his knee. “Hey. Hey.”

Tom snapped his head and gave Bill a sharp look. “Sshh.”

“Don’t you want to?” Bill tried to whisper it, but it came out loud enough for even the driver to hear.

“Sleep? Yeah,” Tom said pointedly.

Bill heaved a great sigh and flopped back in his seat. Gustav was watching the twins with a blank expression on his face.

“How are your blisters?” Tom tried to make conversation with Gustav. He tried treating the situation as normal as possible.

“Better.”

Tom wrinkled his nose. So, Gustav wasn’t much for conversation at the moment. Tom shrugged a shoulder and leaned back, wondering how much further their hotel was.

Bill let out a big yawn and slumped against Tom. Tom tensed a little but then decided it was okay, Georg was practically propped up against Gustav. Tom patted Bill’s shoulder awkwardly and Bill caught Tom’s hand in his own and squeezed it.

Tom didn’t have the heart to pull his hand away from Bill’s, so he tucked their hands discretely between them, stroking his thumb over Bill’s knuckles. He hoped the touch told Bill what he couldn’t say.

Bill squeezed Tom’s hand again and smiled and Tom knew he got the message.

**

Tom said goodnight to Gustav and Georg before sliding the keycard into the door and letting Bill into their hotel room. His eyes lingered on Gustav for a moment before he followed Bill inside.

Bill slumped forward onto the bed and let out a soft sound. “Tomi?”

Tom shut the door and turned to Bill, finding him slowly writhing against the mattress. He gulped and Bill rubbed himself against the blankets, moaning softly. Tom took a step forward and Bill moaned again.

"Tomi, please," Bill begged. "Come over here."

Tom raised an eyebrow and moved toward the bed. Bill was being completely shameless, grinding slowly against the mattress and touching himself a little. Tom bit at his lip ring. No one could make him crazy like his little brother could. He could almost come in his pants just watching Bill.

“Bill,” Tom murmured, taking another few steps. “Take off your clothes.”

“Mmm,” Bill murmured, lying on his back and pushing his shirt up his belly. “You take them off.”

“No, I want to watch this,” Tom said insistently, stopping a few feet from Bill. His groin was aching so hard, and he just wanted to jump on the bed and fuck Bill senseless. “Do it, come on.”

“Hmmmm.” Bill smirked and undid his belt, and left it hanging open. Then he arched his back a little, sliding his little red shirt further up his torso until the pinks of his nipples were exposed. Tom licked at his lips without even knowing. He always thought Bill was amazingly sexy, but there was something more to it tonight. Tom was trembling.

“More?” Bill asked. Tom nodded dumbly. “What do you want to see first?”

All Tom could say back was, “Fuck, everything.”

Bill giggled at this and stroked up his body, shivering against his own touch. He pushed the shirt off himself and leaned up on his elbows. “More than this? “ he asked, blushing shyly.

Tom knew Bill wasn’t shy, but the innocent look on his brother’s face made his stomach hot. “Unzip your pants,” Tom said. “I want to see your dick.”

This made Bill blush for real. “Tom… it’s so hard. If I touch it I might come.”

Tom swore and pushed a firm hand against his own groin. “Take it out, Bill.” He popped the button on his pants and his cock pressed out, hot and erect, from the slit of his boxers. “Take it out so I can get on you.”

“What are you going to do?” Bill asked.

“I’m not gonna last,” Tom admitted. “I just want to…”

Bill nodded and quickly undid his pants, careful not to touch himself. “Get over here. Get on me.”

Tom didn’t waste any time. He bridged the gap between them and got on Bill, and immediately started rubbing his cock against Bill’s groin. He felt Bill reaching down there, fumbling to take his cock out. Tom gasped as he finally felt Bill’s hot, wet skin. He grinded harder, dragging his cock up and down Bill, his hips bucking involuntarily. He was going to come, and hard.

“God, Tomi,” Bill managed, covering his eyes with a hand. “You do it so fucking good…”

Tom just nodded, biting his tongue and rocking his hips against Bill’s. He had a really good rhythm going, he could feel his orgasm just seconds away. “Come with me, okay?” Tom whispered, licking a stripe down Bill’s neck. “We gotta come together.”

“Tell me when, I’m ready,” Bill replied, and then he kissed Tom, their lips mashing together almost painfully. Tom groaned and felt his toes tingle. It was so close, his need to come was so desperate. He thought about flipping Bill over and pushing inside him but he wouldn’t last that long.

Bill cried out and came hard on Tom’s jeans, and Tom let out a low groan. “Fuck, Bill, fuck, that’s so…”

“Do it,” Bill said, his voice catching in his throat. “Do it, I need it on me… God, do you want me to suck it?”

“Yes,” Tom said quickly, falling backward and grinning dumbly. Bill crawled over his legs and took his hard cock in his hands, and then nearly swallowed it. “Fuck!”

Bill nodded, licking around Tom’s cock. “Yum,” he mumbled, a wicked smirk on his face. Tom just leaned his head back, he’d be completely useless after he came. Bill sucked in hard, drawing all the moisture from Tom’s cock, and when he swallowed the first time, Tom felt his stomach burst and he came hard against Bill’s tongue.

Bill took it all, gasping for air and then licking around his lips. Tom fell back against the bed and soon Bill was crawling up his body, cuddling close.

They were both sticky with sweat and come, still in their clothes.

“Fuck,” Tom groaned out. “You wrecked me.”

Bill sighed happily and snuggled closer. “God, you got me so riled up at the club, Tomi.”

“You got me riled up,” Tom said. He squeezed Bill tight and they lay in silence for a few moments. “Um… but did you notice Gustav acting weird?”

“No,” Bill said, yawning. “Why?”

“He almost caught us, I’m certain he suspects something,” Tom said. “I don’t think it’s a big deal, I’m probably just paranoid.” Bill didn’t respond, just kissed Tom’s throat. “Don’t you ever worry about it?”

Bill groaned. “Tom, of course. I’m just… tired and half drunk. Can we talk in the morning?”

“Yeah,” Tom said quietly. He knew they probably wouldn’t. They removed the rest of their clothes and got under the covers, naked and sweaty. Bill burrowed himself under Tom’s arm and Tom closed his eyes. He couldn’t stop thinking about Gustav, and suddenly, their mother popped into his mind. “Oh, no.”

“What’s wrong?” Bill curled against Tom and sighed.

“Nothing.” Tom swallowed and tried to clear his head. He was happy, everything was fine. “Yeah, nothing.”

“Okay,” Bill said softly. He shut his eyes and laid his head on Tom’s arm. For a few minutes there was silence.

“Bill?”

“Yeah.”

“Do you ever think Mom knows?”

Bill frowned. “We’re too careful for that. Tomi, talk tomorrow.”

“Yeah, okay.” Tom tried to shrug it off, but he couldn’t help feeling like they weren’t careful enough. Not nearly.

Don't Tell Mom (10/?)

Wed, 30 Jan 2008 05:29:37 GMT

Title: Don't Tell Mom (10/?)
Previous Chapters: Here
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17 (eventually)
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: What Mom doesn't know won't kill her.

“You told me to,” is the first thing Tom said when he finally got Bill alone. They were in a hotel room, booked together, so they had to talk.

“That’s not how I imagined it would happen,” Bill said, sitting on his bed. He didn’t look at Tom. “I thought you’d talk to me about it first. I thought you’d wait. I didn’t know you were so eager to… to…”

“Bill, Jesus,” Tom said, shaking his head. His dreads whipped across his lips and he took a tentative step toward his brother. “I wasn’t eager, it was an accident, really, and I didn’t even really like it.”

“Don’t lie to me,” Bill said. “You can like it. It’s sex. Just don’t lie. I thought you’d tell me. I thought maybe we’d decide together who it’d be. I thought I’d know. Not be locked out of my own room all night while you just fucked some girl.”

Bill looked up at Tom then, his eyes shining with tears and all of Tom’s anger and annoyance crumbled. He fell to his knees before Bill and hugged his legs. Bill tried to pull away but Tom wrapped his arms tighter.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” he said. “I didn’t think. And it didn’t mean anything and I just… I could barely do it. I swear.”

Bill’s heart tugged as he watched the display in front of him. Tom was almost crying, he was sniffling and taking deep breaths. Bill just put a hand on Tom’s head and stroked his hair once. “I just wish…”

“I know, I know.”

“No,” Bill said, shaking his head. “You don’t know. It doesn’t matter anyway, I guess.”

“Bill, don’t.”

Bill frowned, taking a step back, freeing himself from Tom. “Can I trust you?”

Tom’s eyes widened and he looked up. “You don’t think you can?”

Bill shrugged a shoulder slowly. “I can’t believe you did that, Tomi.”

Tom let out a ragged breath and sat on the floor, drawing his knees to his chest. He felt numb, stupid, and exhausted. The way Bill was looking at him was something he couldn’t handle, and he was afraid of it.

“I was confused, I thought that maybe I was doing what you wanted,” Tom said, wiping at his eyes. “You wanted me to.”

Bill sighed and crawled off the bed. He sat next to Tom and leaned against his shoulder. “I don’t want to fight, I just feel hurt. I guess… I wasn’t ready for it. I thought I would be ready, that we would, I don’t know, figure it out together. You and me. Like always.”

Tom nodded and pressed his face into Bill’s neck. “I’ve never hurt you like this before. I don’t know what to do.”

Bill stroked Tom’s hair and hushed him gently. “You did it for us, right?”

“Yes. I wouldn’t just…”

“Okay,” Bill said. “Okay. Then that’s it. You did it for us. I’m not mad. We’ve had girlfriends before, you’ve even slept with girls before, this is just like that.”

“I love you,” Tom said. He hugged Bill tightly, kissed his neck and ran his hands all up and down Bill’s back.

Bill sighed and pressed against Tom. “It’s okay, Tomi, I love you.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Bill nodded, smiling a little but it still hurt. He blinked hard a few times, his eyes were wet with tears, too, and he took a few deep breaths. “God, this is dumb. Tom, of course you didn’t mean to hurt me. Right?”

Tom just squeezed Bill tighter, spreading his fingers out on the back of Bill’s head, massaging his hair. “Bill, stop. You know…”

“Yes. Yes, yes,” Bill said hastily, nodding. “I’m sorry, Tomi, I’m sorry.”

“Now you’re apologizing?” Tom laughed softly, finally smiling, finally believing it was going to be okay. “Cut it out, you’re so dumb.”

Bill punched Tom gently in the shoulder. “Kiss me.”

Tom smirked and pulled Bill into a long, lasting kiss. When they pulled apart, they were both smiling, almost shyly.

“I guess one good thing came of this,” Bill said softly.

“Hm?”

“Georg and Gustav saw you leave with her, obviously,” Bill said, wrinkling his nose. “Maybe Gustav will get off our backs?”

“Yeah, I guess,” Tom said.

Bill touched Tom’s jaw with soft fingers and said, very quietly, “But it wasn’t that good, right? With her?”

Tom shook his head, dipped his head down and kissed Bill’s fingers. “It was nothing. I could only think of you.”

“Really?” Bill whispered. He scooted closer, nearly in Tom’s lap. “You’d rather with me?”

“Of course,” Tom said. “Of course, Bill. I don’t want to do it with anyone else. You’re so much better.”

“Am I?” Bill’s lips brushed Tom’s and they tumbled to the floor. Tom pressed down into Bill, kissing up his throat.

“You’re my Bill,” Tom said, huskily.

Bill grinned, arched up. “Show me.”

Tom stroked all down Bill’s body and tried his best to show Bill just how much he loved him.

**

Tom held Bill down and moved against him as Bill writhed deliciously underneath. Their lips connected and Bill sucked Tom’s lower lip into his mouth, swirling his tongue around the piercing and loving the taste of his brother’s lips.

They were home, just for a small break. Their mother and Gordon had been out all day and the twins had been taking advantage of their alone time in the familiar bedroom, in the very bed where it all began, years ago. Bill loved the smell of Tom’s room, which used to be his room, too. It was comforting and warm, and he felt ridiculously happy.

“When did she say she’d be home?” Bill breathed. He felt Tom’s cock nudging his hole. He flinched, pushing into the touch. “How much longer?… Oh….”

Tom thrust forward, not sinking into Bill, but sliding between his hot thighs. “Bill, shh, don’t talk about Mom while we’re…”

“I know, I know,” Bill replied, grinning and kissing Tom’s neck. He trapped Tom’s dick between his thighs and squeezed. “You’re so hard, so hard, Tomi. Why?”

“Are you kidding?” Tom paused and held Bill down again. “Bill…”

“Mm,” was all Bill said, closing his eyes and releasing Tom’s cock from between his thighs. “In me now, I’m ready.”

“Let me get more lube,” Tom said, and Bill smacked Tom on the arm. “Ouch!”

“No more lube,” Bill said. “You’ve been teasing me forever and we don’t have much time.”

“Mom said she’d be gone all day.” Tom bumped his cock against Bill again and they both groaned.

“Tomi, it’s been all day,” Bill whined. He nudged his nose up against Tom’s. “Just fuck me already.”

Tom groaned and then grinned, pushing against Bill, screwing him down into the mattress. “Just… be patient.”

“Mm,” Bill moaned softly, blinking up at his brother. Tom felt his chest tighten a little, Bill looked so decadent underneath him and he wanted nothing more than to press against his body and move inside him. “Tomi, you’re taking too long… Too long.”

“It’ll be better this way, you’re getting me so fucking hard,” Tom whispered. “Your ass… Bill, ugh.”

Bill smiled and squirmed, pulling Tom down and locking his legs around Tom’s waist. Tom’s erection slid right between Bill’s thighs and nudged behind his balls, and Bill moaned loudly. “Come on, do it.”

“I’m working on it,” Tom hissed.

Bill felt something push against his hole and then, the delicious burn of being penetrated. He mewled and then huffed as he realized it was just Tom’s finger. “No, Tomi, you’ve already done that.”

“Just a little more,” Tom said. “I love touching you.”

“I love you fucking me,” Bill shot back. “Hard. When no one’s around. And no one’s around for once. Please, Tomi. I need--” Bill cried out as Tom removed his fingers and slammed into his body, hard and rough. “Jesus!”

Tom gritted his teeth and forced himself not to come immediately.

**

Simone dug through her shoulder bag, so cluttered with things, looking for her house keys. She had just been dropped off by her friend after a day of shopping in the city. She was tired, her feet ached, and she was anxious to see her boys.

She found her keys and then pulled her cell phone out, too. She dialed a familiar number and waited for an answer. “Hello?”

“Gordon, honey,” Simone said, dropping her shopping bags and leaning against the house. “I just wanted to tell you I made it home.”

“So early?” Gordon chuckled. “How much did it cost me?”

“Oh,” Simone replied, rolling her eyes. “When can we expect you home? What do you want for dinner?”

“Ah, late. You and the boys should order pizza or something.”

“Okay,” Simone said, picking up her bags and positioning her keys in the front door. “I’ll talk to you later, love you.”

“Love, you, bye.”

Simone slipped the phone into her bag and turned the doorknob.

**

“Ohhhhhhh, yes,” Bill moaned. “Yes. Yes!”

Tom pulled out and stared down at Bill, watching him writhe against the mattress. “Fuck, Bill, you’re beautiful.”

Bill’s face flushed even redder. “More,” was all he said and Tom eased back inside. The bed squeaked as they moved, their eyes never leaving each other.

Tom gripped the headboard, pushed as deeply into Bill as he could. “Oh, god, love you,” Tom said.

Bill smiled and spread his legs even wider. “I love you. Oh, fuck, I love you!”

Heat coursed down to Tom’s belly and he couldn’t hold back anymore. He started shoving into Bill as hard as he could, holding him down and moaning.

Bill was moaning, too, moaning and shouting. And was that screaming? “Gonna come!” Bill cried. “Oh… oh!”

Tom thrust in again and humped forward sharply. “Me too,” he whispered.

**

Simone closed the door with a soft click and dropped her bags on the kitchen table. Her feet were killing her.

“Boys?” she called out.

She was answered by some funny sounds. She heard a raucous coming from up the stairs, a thumping and bumping and a scream.

“Bill?” Simone moved quickly to the bottom of the staircase. She paused, listening more.

And then she paled.

“Oh, god, Tom… Tom, oh my god, you’re so… Ugh, Jesus, Tomi… Tomi… So close, gonna come… Oh god, you always do it so good… Do it… Harder…” Bill’s voice carried through the halls of the house, hitting Simone like a ton of bricks.

“Oh, my god,” she whispered, recoiling a bit. Her eyes were glued to the door at the top of the stairs; Tom’s door.

A loud moan rang out, making her flinch, and then she heard a grunting. “God, Bill, you got it everywhere.”

“It’s in me, it’s in me, oh god,” Bill replied loudly, breathlessly. She then heard a loud thunking against the wall, and she shook a little.

“Bill, fuckin’ love you, god, you’re so fuckin’ beautiful…”

Simone put her hand over her mouth and quickly went back outside, her stomach lurching. She walked down the pathway a little and leaned against the mailbox, bending over and breathing deeply. Her mouth watered and she felt like she might throw up. She wasn’t sure.

She was sure of one thing, though. She had been right the entire time. All those years when she suspected the worst things about her twins, she was right.

She stood up straight and took a few deep breaths, closing her eyes and rubbing her middle.

“Fuck,” she said bitterly. “Fucking hell.” She kicked the mailbox angrily. “This is my fault.”
She wanted to scream or cry. Anything to release the anger and sadness inside of her.

‘What can I do?’

She did the only thing she could think of. She walked back to the house, shaking as she reached the door. She opened the door and slammed it loudly.

"Boys, I’m home!" she called out. The house was silent and she breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe she’d imagined it all?

There was a creak at the stairs and Bill walked down in a crumpled t-shirt and sleep pants. His hair was mussed, even more than normal, and his faced was flushed. He smiled at her and stretched.

"Hey, Mom, back already?" he asked. She couldn’t say anything for a moment, staring at him dumbly. He looked radiant, happy, and like he’d just…

"Yeah," she said.

"Are you okay? You look a little sick," Bill said, raising an eyebrow.

"No, no. I’m fine," she said. "Just feeling a little… off." It was then she noticed a towel around his neck.

"Going to take a shower," he said. "Will you start dinner soon, I’m starved."

She swallowed. "Why don’t you use the upstairs bathroom?"

"Tom’s using it. And I know what you’ll say, the hot water will run out. I guess we could shower together to conserve water," he said, with a small laugh.

Simone blanched and Bill gave her an odd look.

"I was kidding," he said. "You should sit down or something. Maybe we could order pizza?"

"Um, yeah." Simone sat down at the table and Bill gave her a small peck on the cheek and then disappeared into the bathroom. Bill had smelled like sweat and Tom’s cologne. Simone shuddered a little at Bill’s touch, putting her hand to her cheek and feeling ill.

She didn’t know what to do. She wanted to do something, needed to. She couldn’t just sit around and think about what her boys were getting up to. She’d go insane.

She wondered if she was the only one who noticed, who knew. She really hoped so. Most of all, beyond being disgusted and shocked and bewildered, she was worried. She was so worried for them, worried of what might happen to them. Of what would happen to them.

They weren’t careful, that much was for sure. Not at home, at least. Simone sighed loudly and covered her face with her hands, leaning back and groaning. She didn’t notice Tom shuffle in, rubbing at his face.

“Mom?”

Simone looked up, and her face immediately clouded over. She felt angry at Tom. She just glared at him, not knowing what to say.

“Mom, um, what’s up?” Tom asked nervously. He looked every bit as disheveled as Bill.

“What about your shower?” she said sharply.

Tom frowned. “You know how the upstairs shower sucks.”

“You should shower,” Simone said, looking down. “Your brother is.”

“Yeah, I know…” Tom shifted uncomfortably on his feet. “I’ll get to it, don’t worry.”

Simone stood up and walked past him, mumbling something under her breath. Tom watched with confusion, biting his lip.

“Mom…?”

He heard his mother’s bedroom door close firmly. Tom sat down heavily at the kitchen table. He couldn’t figure out what was bugging his mother.

**

Simone clutched the phone to her ear, trembling a little as she heard it ringing on the other end. It was past midnight and she was standing near the sink in the bathroom, the entire house dark and silent. Maybe this was a bad idea. Maybe she should hang up.

She couldn’t.

The phone rang two more times before a groggy voice picked up.

"Hello?"

"They’re home," she said, unable to keep the anger out of her voice. "Did you even know?"

Jorg cleared his throat. "Simone? It’s fucking… it’s almost one in the morning. What are you talking about?"

"Our sons are home from tour," she said. She leaned against the sink, watched her face in the mirror.

"Fuck, what are you even talking about?" Jorg replied. There was a silent moment, only their tired breaths over the line.

"You’re not even in their lives," Simone said.

Jorg sighed loudly. "Make your point."

"If they’re fucked up, it’s your fault." She felt tears sting in her eyes. "Yours."

"How?" he asked. "I saw them on TV the other day. I was disgusted. How could you let Bill get that way?"

A pang of hurt seared through her for Bill and she scowled. "I’m not talking about Bill. I’m talking about Bill and Tom. Together."

"What’s wrong?" Jorg asked. "Are they doing drugs or something?"

Simone didn’t know how to say it. She knew she should, she had to tell someone. "No. Jorg, I don’t know what to do. They…"

"You don’t let me be in their lives," Jorg interrupted. "And you know what? They don’t want me to be in their lives. They never have, and after all I’ve done for you. Supporting you and the kids and then to just have it thrown back in my face. What they do isn’t my concern."

Simone clutched at the sink, feeling dizzy with anger. "You know what? Nevermind," she spat out. "You don’t deserve to know. You’ve never been a father, Jorg."

She didn’t wait for a response, just hung up the phone and crouched down on the floor, trying to breathe. She couldn’t take this. How could she?

How could she tell anyone? How could she deal with it on her own? It was breaking her apart, shattering her heart.

She loved her boys no matter what, but this had to stop. It had to end. It was wrong.

But she was too scared to say anything, to acknowledge that it was real. Just the thought of it made her sick.

Her two babies, her beautiful, talented boys were…

"Incest," she said and shuddered. A few tears fell and she stared at the floor.

**

Tom was sitting by himself in the living room, picking at his guitar. He was trying to work out some sour notes, trying to perfect a few riffs that had been giving him trouble. He was really in it, bobbing his head and mouthing along the words to the song. He didn’t even notice that his mother had walked in.

“Tom.” Simone folded her arms, tensing. “Tom.”

Tom looked up blankly, still focused on his music. “What?”

“Put that down,” Simone said, gesturing to the guitar. “Where’s your brother?”

“Uh…” Tom set his guitar flat in his lap. “With Andreas, I think. Mall, maybe.”

Simone sighed and turned around to go into the kitchen, but something made her turn around and stare at her son again.

“What is it?” Tom asked, irritated. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” Simone frowned and started to turn again, but she stopped. “No. No, actually. I need to talk to you.”

Tom let out a tiny sigh and leaned his guitar against the couch. “What’s up?” he said casually.

Simone opened her mouth to say something but as she looked at Tom, all she could picture were the things he might be doing to Bill, what he might be coercing Bill to do. She felt angry, so angry, and started to shake a little.

“Mom?” Tom stood up and went to her, touched her shoulder. She pulled away, shaking her head quickly.

“No, no. No,” she said firmly, not even looking at Tom. Tom went to touch her again, and she recoiled.

"Mom?" Tom had never seen her this way and his heart began to beat rapidly. She’d never pushed him away before. Not like this.

"Tom," she said, shaking. "What are you doing?"

"What?"

She looked away from him and said, "What are you doing to Bill?"

Tom felt like he’d been punched in the stomach. What did she mean? She couldn’t know. No one knew. They’d made sure of that.

"I’m not doing anything. What--"

"I heard you yesterday!" she cried. Her entire face was red. "I heard you!"

"Heard what?" Tom asked. He knew and his stomach turned.

Simone shook her head furiously. "Don’t make me say it, Tom."

Tom slammed his hand down on the back of the couch and swore. "Fuck, fuck, fuck." Now he couldn’t look at her, but she grabbed his face and forced him to. Her nails dug into his cheeks and he gasped at how rough she was being.

"Look at me," she demanded.

Tears started welling up in Tom’s eyes. "Mom, I’m sorry. I… I’m sorry! I’m sorry!"

"How could you, Tom?" she said. She let go of him but didn’t move back. "Tell me how this happened."

He swore again. "No."

"Are you hurting him? Did you make him?"

Tom clenched his fists together and yelled, "I love him! I’d never hurt him!"

"I knew this was happening, for so long. Why didn’t I say anything? This is my fault," Simone said. She wiped at her eyes and Tom wanted to comfort her, but he was scared.

"Mom, no," he said. "You didn’t do anything."

“You can’t do this,” Simone said helplessly. “You can’t do this, Tom. It’s wrong and sick and… You can’t do this. Not in my house, not anywhere. Poor Bill, Tom. How could you do this to him?”

Tom stood up to his full height, he was taller than his mother now but she glared steadily at him, challenging him. “Mom, you have no idea. It isn’t what you think. Nothing is what you think, you’re imagining things. I didn’t do anything to Bill, Jesus. I didn’t do anything!”

“Tom.”

“We don’t… Not what you think.” Tom felt frantic, angry, desperate.

“Tom, I heard!” Simone shouted, her words hitting Tom in the face like a brick. “I heard you, I walked in the house and… heard you!”

Tom paled, and he stumbled back a bit. “No, you didn’t, it‘s not what you think.”

“Tom Kaulitz, don’t you lie to me. I heard, and I know exactly what I heard,” Simone said lowly.

“Shit,” Tom said, his stomach swirling with discomfort. “Shit, shit. Mom… It wasn’t… It was just once! One time. One time, you heard the only time.”

“I don’t believe you,” Simone replied, her voice shaking. “I don’t believe you, Tom, not anymore. I can’t. I’ve suspected this for so long.”

Tom was at a loss. He couldn’t fight his way out because he knew that they both knew exactly what was going on.

“What are you going to do?” was all Tom could say. He felt defeated, tired. He couldn’t even be embarrassed, he felt so desperate.

"What can I do?" she asked.

The tears fell down Tom’s cheeks then and he grabbed her arms tightly. "Please don’t tell Bill. Don’t ask him about any of this. I promise we won’t do it in the house ever again. Just don’t tell Bill. You’ll never hear a word about it again, I promise. It’ll be like it never happened. Mom. Please. Just god, don’t tell him." The tears were falling steadily and he sniffled, hanging onto his mother.

Simone couldn’t help it, no matter how upset she was, she had to comfort him. She hadn’t seen him cry in years and he was her son. She wrapped her arms around him.

"Tom, it’s wrong," she said, softly. She rubbed his back and pressed a kiss to his head. "It’s so wrong. He’s your brother, your twin brother. And you’re always in the public eye. You’re not just messing up your life, but Bill’s, and the band. Our life, Tom. You can’t want this."

Tom just cried harder, burying his face in Simone’s shoulder. "Don’t tell Bill. Just don’t tell Bill."

Simone sighed and promised him she wouldn’t, though she knew it was a promise she couldn’t keep.

Don't Tell Mom (9/?)

Fri, 18 Jan 2008 10:18:09 GMT

Title: Don't Tell Mom (9/?)
Previous Chapters: Here
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17 (eventually)
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: What Mom doesn't know won't kill her.

.age 16, Schrei Tour.

Tom pushed the curtain aside and Bill’s eyes blinked open. He watched his brother sneak into his bunk and he groaned softly.

“Tomi, no,” Bill said sleepily. He sat up and Tom loomed over him, pushing him back against the mattress. Tom was warm and smelled like home, and Bill couldn’t push him back. “Tomi, what are you doing?”

“Quiet,” Tom said and lowered himself down, covering Bill. He dipped his head and kissed all down Bill’s neck, breathing him in, pressing their bodies together. “Please,” he breathed out.

Tom’s mouth opened, hot and wet, against Bill’s throat and they both groaned.

“We promised we wouldn’t do this,” Bill managed to get out. “Not in the tour bus, it’s too dangerous.”

“I can’t take it,” Tom said. “Just let me… smell you.”

Bill smiled and felt his toes curl. “It’s been so long, Tomi. I’ll do something bad… You should really go. Go sleep.”

“Can’t fuckin’ sleep, have you heard Georg? He snores so loud,” Tom replied, licking at Bill’s neck and threading their fingers together. “He sounds like he’s, I don’t know, dying.”

“Mm,” Bill said, turning his face and connecting their lips. They kissed slowly, exploring each other’s bodies with fingers, hands. Bill sighed loudly and a little moan escaped his lips. “Oh, god.”

“Sshh.” Tom pressed his body down, grinding this growing arousals together. He felt so warm, so much better than he did in his own bunk. Bunk life was nothing like home life. Tom missed his bed, he missed his room. He missed Bill in his bed, in his room. He cupped Bill’s jaw and pushed his tongue in Bill’s mouth, licking the roof of his mouth and just behind his teeth. Bill grinned into the wet kiss and groaned.

“God, Tomi, you’re making me so… So fucking…” Bill grunted and hugged Tom firmly to his body. “I’m glad you came. I was cold.”

“You feel warm, don’t lie,” Tom said, smirking.

“Fine, I was really horny.”

“Oh, yeah?”

Bill rolled his eyes and pushed Tom back. “Seriously, though, we can’t…”

Tom dragged his fingers down Bill’s body, feeling his soft skin and the tight muscles of his stomach and thighs. They hadn’t been together, really been together, in over a week, and Tom felt like he was ready to go crazy.

He wanted inside Bill. He stroked Bill through his boxers and said, smiling, “Just one kiss. That’s all I want.”

“Yeah right,” Bill said, arching against the touch. Tom stroked him harder and he sighed. “Okay, just one kiss.”

“Mmm…” Tom kissed Bill’s chin and up to his mouth, licking at Bill’s bottom lip. “You know I’ll need more than one.”

Bill would have laughed and agreed but Tom’s mouth was on his before he could even think. Their mouths opened, their tongues met, and they moved together on the bed. This was a slippery slope, they both knew. Once they started kissing it was hard to stop.

They’d nearly gotten themselves caught a dozen times when they lived in the band apartment in the city. Tom would tease Bill into a kiss and before they knew it, they’d be joined together, half naked and writhing wherever they could find a spot to lie.

There was some thrill in almost getting caught, but they both missed the closed door privacy of their home. Their last evening home had been spent packing. Bill suppressed the urge to moan loudly as Tom slid his hand down the back of his boxers. The ache was back, that curious ache that only Tom could relieve. They slid together, moved together, twined their legs.

Tom stroked down the crease of Bill’s ass and Bill gasped. “No,” Bill whispered.

“Come on, I won’t do anything.”

“You’re already doing something.” Bill raised his eyebrows and clenched his bottom. Tom pushed in, pressing right against his hole. Bill sighed and gave up, he could restrain himself. He could be quiet. “Oh, Tomi…”

“I know, I know you like that,” Tom said. “You feel really good.”

Bill nodded, Tom’s finger felt really good, too. “But… stop. I’ll want more.”

Tom removed his fingers and pulled his hand out from under Bill. “Okay, I’ll just…” He slid his hand down Bill’s belly and Bill almost yelped. “No?”

“I-”

The twins froze as they heard movement outside the bunk.

“Bill, are you awake?”

It was Gustav. Tom jumped to the other end of the bed just as Gustav pulled the curtain open. “Um… what are you guys doing?

Bill flushed, looked away, bringing the blankets up to his chin. Tom thought fast and said, “Just sitting with Bill. He’s homesick again.”

Bill nodded dumbly and Gustav stared hard at them, an eyebrow raised. “Oooookay,” he said. “Do you have my headphones? Georg’s snoring and it’s driving me nuts.”

“Um.” Bill was still flushing like mad, but he nodded and moved, reaching under his mattress and finding the headphones. “Here.” Gustav took them but didn’t move back. He stared at the twins, and Bill could see the wheels in his head turning. “What?”

Gustav leaned in. “It’s okay to be homesick, Bill. It happens to me, too. You’re lucky you’ve got Tom with you, you know?”

Bill smiled slightly. “Yeah, I know.”

Gustav gave an awkward glance at Tom and then let go of the curtain. As the twins were enveloped in darkness again, they heard Gustav shuffling away. Neither of them moved for a moment.

“What?” Bill whispered.

“I’m afraid to come back.”

“Just get over here,” Bill said, tugging on Tom’s feet. “I’m homesick.”

“That was so close,” Tom said quietly. He slowly crawled back over Bill, and kissed his chin. “That was… Yeah, we won’t do that again.”

“You’re doing it again!” Bill laughed softly, ducking his head away from Tom. “You’re-”

“Sshh.” Tom pressed two fingers against Bill’s lips and Bill smirked, then sucked them into his mouth. Tom groaned and tried to pull back, but Bill just held him close, trembling slightly. “Bill, cut it out. We can‘t do this shit. Not here.”

Bill frowned. “Fine, sorry.”

“Get over it.”

“Maybe.” Bill pulled Tom close again and kissed him hard, licking at Tom’s lips. His mouth watered, he loved Tom’s taste, he wanted more. He knew he had to hold back. “God, okay, sorry. Enough. Oh!”

“What?”

“Hotel this weekend.” Bill wrinkled his nose against Tom’s cheek. “Then… Then…”

Tom frowned. “Then what?”

“Then we can be together, idiot.” Bill kissed Tom’s face and sighed, wiggling out from under him. Tom stroked Bill’s hair, face, and neck. He knew he had to leave.

“Okay, well,” Tom said, still touching Bill. “I can wait.”

Bill smiled wide. “You’ve been so good, Tomi. Such a good boy.”

Tom snorted and tipped his head forward, breathing across Bill’s mouth. “In a few days I’m gonna be really, really bad.”

Bill sighed out a moan and pressed one last kiss to Tom’s mouth, this one hot, longing, and wet. “Night, Tomi.”

“Night, Bill,” Tom said. “Think of me.”

Bill laughed. “You know I will.”

**

Tom groaned and held Bill down, swearing as he thrust even deeper than before. They’d been at it all night, and now Tom was finally in Bill, all the foreplay out of the way, and they were both ready to get down to business.

“Oh fuck, yes,” Bill moaned out. “Do it to me, Tomi, please.”

Tom pulled back and then grinded back in, hard and rough, and he sobbed out Bill’s name. Bill was clenching around him rhythmically, a trick he’d developed over the past year and Tom had to stop himself from giving in and just coming.

He couldn’t do that, come after only a few thrusts like he’d used to when they were younger. Now they were so much better at it, nearly pros at getting each other off. The sex only got better the more they did it, and they did it as much as they could, as much as was safe. The last thing they wanted was to get caught and lose each other.

“Harder, harder,” Bill said, eyes wide and hands gripping Tom’s shoulders. “Fuck, you’ve gotta do it harder.”

“Uh,” Tom grunted, pushing into Bill and squeezing Bill’s thighs. “Shit, I’m gonna come so quick.”

“No, no,” Bill breathed. “Make it last.”

“I’ll try…” Tom trailed off, his cell phone was ringing and vibrating crazily on the bedside table. He sighed, irritated, and stole a glance at the small screen of the phone. It was their mother. “Fuck.”

“Who is it?” Bill’s voice was ragged.

“Mom… It’s Mom again,” Tom groaned.

“Again?” Bill almost sounded panicked, his clenched hard around Tom’s cock. “What if something happened? Tomi…”

“Nothing happened.”

“You don’t know,” Bill whined. Tom groaned again, determined not to lose his hardness. “Pick up.”

“Fine, I’m not done, though,” Tom told him. Bill just nodded as Tom leaned over and picked up the phone. “Mom, is something wrong? Oh, nothing? Well, what’s up?” Tom put his hand over the receiver and whispered to Bill, “Nothing’s wrong, I told you.”

Bill almost giggled, Tom was still deep inside him. Much to Bill’s dismay, Tom pulled out and rolled to his back, still very hard and very big. Bill whined and stared at Tom.

“Yeah, everything’s going great,” Tom said. Bill crawled close to Tom, smoothing his hands up Tom’s thighs, touching the base of his dick. Tom groaned and batted Bill’s hands away. “No, Mom, I’m fine. Really. Why wouldn’t I be? The tour is great.”

Bill pouted as Tom continued talking to their mother. Clearly, nothing was wrong, though Bill could tell their mother was being a bit weird, questioning Tom and worrying over nothing. She’d been very concerned over their leaving for tour, in fact, Bill got the feeling she was mostly concerned about them being together, out of her sight.

Simone was always watching them at home, not unkindly, but with a strange look in her eyes. Bill knew she loved them, knew she cared for them greatly, but it was obvious that she thought something was up with her boys.

Bill stared at Tom’s dick, his insides aching. Something was definitely up. He crawled over Tom, straddling his brother’s lap, and refused to be pushed back. Tom stuttered out an answer to his mother and Bill grinned, grabbing Tom’s erection and getting up on his knees.

Tom pulled the phone away, covering the receiver. “Bill… no,” he murmured. But Bill lowered himself and took Tom’s cock in anyway. Tom hissed, nearly dropping the phone, and grabbed Bill’s hip with one shaking hand.

“Oh,” Bill sighed out, seating himself fully on Tom’s lap.

“Holy shit,” Tom managed. He pressed the phone to his face again, tried to control his breathing as Bill sat on his cock. “Uh… Mom, I think I have to go, I’m tired.”

“You don’t sound tired. Where is your brother?” Simone asked on the other end of the phone line.

“He’s around,” Tom replied. Bill was grinning down at him, moving steadily, fucking himself. Tom groaned softly. “You can call him if you want, probably.”

Bill shook his head rapidly.

“But I think he’s sleeping,” Tom finished.

“You think? Don’t you know?” Simone asked.

“No,” Tom said. “I’m not his babysitter.”

“I know that,” Simone said quietly, briskly. “I just thought you shared hotel rooms. David Jost told me…”

Tom shook his head, he just wanted to get off the phone and finish fucking the life out of Bill. “Yeah, well, sometimes we get our own rooms, like tonight. We got our own rooms. It’s a reward or something.”

“David calls me each time you stop and gives me your room numbers, funny that yours and Bill’s are so similar? The same number, even?” Simone remarked.

“God, I am so tired, Mom,” Tom said loudly. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow, okay?”

“Tom, wait-”

“Night, Mom.”

Simone hesitated. “Good night. I love you.”

Tom shut his phone and tossed it back on the table. “You’re paying for that,” he told Bill.

“What?” Bill was on cloud nine, blissed out and riding Tom. He had his hands on his chest and he was swaying, bobbing. Tom almost lost it at the sight of Bill, he almost wanted to lie back and watch Bill do this thing. However…

“Okay,” Tom said lowly, grabbing Bill by the hips and laying him on the bed. Bill gasped and groaned, struggling with his arms and scratching at Tom’s back. Tom ignored it and thrust hard inside Bill, quickly, at a rapid pace. Bill’s eyes rolled back and he moaned louder than Tom had heard in a while, louder than he remembered. Tom grinned, felt himself swell inside Bill. “Fuck, Bill, keep doing that…”

“You’re… Oh, god…” Bill moaned again, clutching his head. “Tom, you feel amazing, oh my god. I’d forgotten, oh god…”

Tom pressed his entire body down against Bill’s, rubbed their chests together and thrust in as deep as he could. Bill tried to arch up, tried to move with Tom’s thrusts, but Tom held him down completely, kept him still in his strong arms.

“Let me move,” Bull whined. “I want to push up against you, Tomi.”

Tom groaned and put a small bit of space between them. Bill immediately arched up, taking Tom deep inside his hot body, and they both moaned. Bill very much loved for Tom to give him the control, loved gripping Tom inside him and writhing on his cock.

Bill worked Tom inside him and soon they were both panting and clutching at each other, their orgasms nearing. Tom gripped Bill’s hips and took him down further, seating him fully, hitting Bill’s spot almost dead on. Bill wailed and covered his face with his hands, he felt as if Tom had reached inside him and itched something so very sensitive.

Bill sighed and came into his orgasm easily, bucking forward and clutching at Tom’s shoulders. He squeezed Tom’s cock inside him as he came, eyes shut and neck stretched long. Tom gasped and smoothed Bill’s come on his stomach, and tasted some of it. He smiled up at Bill, and Bill opened his eyes wide, letting out a choked sob.

“Come, come, come,” Bill whispered, pinching one of Tom’s nipples. Tom grunted and nearly shoved Bill off the bed as he found his own release. He came inside Bill and pulled out, then painting Bill’s stomach with the warm liquid. Bill grinned and reached for Tom’s cock, giving it a long stroke. Tom shuddered, pulling back and letting out a ragged breath.

“Fuck, that was,” Tom said shakily, leaning back on his elbows, “the most amazing-”

“No, it wasn’t,” Bill said.

“Pretty fuckin’ good,” Tom finished, touching the head of his cock and wincing. He rolled over and reached for a cigarette. Bill picked up the lighter and lit Tom’s cigarette, and inhaled the first smoky trail.

“Now I’m hungry,” Bill whispered, taking the cigarette from his brother and sucking in, letting the smoke out through his nose. “So fucking hungry… Ooh, thirsty, too.”

Tom took the cigarette back and took a long drag. “Jesus, don’t know if I can even get up.”

Bill laughed. “We’ve had better.”

“Not much,” Tom said, blowing out the smoke. “I could feel that one all the way down to my toes.”

Bill grinned, rolled over and kissed Tom’s chin. “What about that time at Grandma’s?”

Tom gulped hard at the memory. “Well, that was just…” Tom couldn’t think of a word for what it was. They’d been at their grandmother’s for the weekend and had taken advantage of the fact that she went to bed so early every evening. They had a few very naughty midnight rendezvous, and the night before they left had been the absolute best.

“It was mind blowing,” Bill supplied. “I swear, we woke Grandma.”

Tom made a face. “She could sleep through an earthquake.”

“I was louder than an earthquake,” Bill said. He stroked down Tom’s chest. “You made me scream, you were so naughty.”

Tom closed his eyes and smiled. They’d done it in the kitchen, on the table. Tom was actually getting hard again just thinking about it. “Bill…”

Bill purred, snuggled closer. “Get me a Coke from the minibar, Tomi. Please.”

Tom groaned. “Only Pepsi.”

Bill scrunched up his face. “Vending machine?”

“Bill, you got me all hard again…”

“Go,” Bill urged, nipping at Tom’s shoulder. “Go and come back and we’ll do it again, this time even better. Better than Grandma’s.”

Tom grunted and stood up, he was motivated. “You’re sucking it for me, for this,” he said, reaching for a pair of boxers. “For a long time, then you’re swallowing all of it and then you’re going to make it hard again and doing it some more.”

“Maybe I’ll just have that Pepsi.”

Tom shoved Bill hard and grinned. “Ass,” he said. “I’ll be right back.”

“Tomi…”

“What?”

Bill rolled onto his stomach and smirked. “You look like you just fucked the hell out of someone.”

“Well, I did.” Tom folded his arms, and looked in the mirror. His forehead was glistening with sweat, and his hair was matted down, and his eyes looked hazy. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

Tom shook his head as he left the room, jingling the change in his hand. He was barefoot, padding down the carpeted hotel hallway, and he felt great. The vending machines were humming down the end of the corridor, a little area lit up brilliantly with fluorescent lighting. Tom was just about to round a corner when he almost walked right into Gustav.

“Woah,” Gustav said, holding up his hands and laughing. “Earth to Tom.”

Tom blinked. “Sorry.”

“What the hell have you been up to?” Gustav squinted at him. “You look like… You look wrecked.”

“I feel great,” Tom said honestly.

“What are you up to?”

Tom shrugged. “Messing with some music.”

“Where’s Bill?” Gustav asked, frowning.

“He’s in there.” Tom gestured behind him. “In the hotel room. Sleeping.”

Gustav gave Tom a strange look. “Sleeping already? It’s early.“

“He’s tired,“ Tom said. “It was a big show tonight, you know.“

“Tom,” Gustav said seriously. “Do you have a girl in there or something?”

“No,” Tom said, his voice sharp. “Why would I?”

“I didn’t think you did, but…” Gustav just shook his head. “Um. It’s just you and Bill in there?”

Tom felt his palms beginning to sweat, felt his heart beginning to race as Gustav gave him a long, hard look. It was the same look he’d given them that night in the bunks. Like he knew something, or was close to figuring something out.

“Yeah, it’s just me and Bill,” Tom said back. “Is that a problem?”

Gustav coughed. “Of course not. Anyway…. well. Night.”

“Night,” Tom said, watching Gustav walk to his room. He waited until Gustav disappeared behind the door before turning around and immediately going back into his own room. Bill was lounging on the bed, and grinned up at him when the door opened.

“No Coke?” Bill pouted.

Tom shook his head and sat down next to Bill.

“Is something wrong?” Bill asked. He scooted close to Tom and pressed a soft kiss to his brother’s shoulder. “Tomi?”

“I think Gustav knows.”

Bill shook his head. “How?”

“Even if he doesn’t, he’s suspicious. I can tell. He gave me a weird look when I was out there,” Tom said.

“Just because Gustav gave you a dirty look, you didn’t get me a Coke?” Bill poked Tom in the arm. “I think you’re being too paranoid. We’re careful.”

“Not careful enough, I know that look,” Tom said. “The sort of look Mom gets sometimes, when she knows.”

“Mom doesn’t know,” Bill said, his voice more serious now. “You really think he knows?”

Tom shrugged. “We’ve gotta be more careful. I can’t lose you.”

Bill immediately stored himself right under Tom’s arm and rested his arms on Tom’s thigh. Tom was reminded of their cat at home, and he stroked Bill’s soft hair, staring at the wall in front of him. Bill sighed and wrinkled his nose.

“What should we do?” Bill asked softly.

Tom frowned. “If Gustav knows something, I don’t know. If he thinks something’s going on, then other people will, too.”

Bill bit his lip. “Should we stop?”

Tom’s grip tightened on Bill hard enough to make Bill squeak. “Don’t ever say that,” Tom growled, hugging Bill to him and kissing his temple fiercely. Bill couldn’t move in Tom’s hold.

“I didn’t mean it,” Bill said, voice very soft. “I’d never want to stop.” Tom squeezed him harder, wrapped him up even tighter. “Tomi, I promise I didn’t mean it.”

“I can’t be without you,” Tom said. Bill nuzzled into Tom and pressed a soft kiss to his throat.

“Me either,” Bill said.

“No one can ever know,” Tom said. “And they won’t and it’ll be alright and… and it’ll work.” Tom sounded almost ready to cry.

Bill sat up on his knees and kissed Tom’s face and stroked down his arms. “It’ll work. We’ll just be careful. Like we were with Mom. Like we are with Mom. Don’t worry.”

“Yeah like Mom…” Tom trailed off. “Hey, remember how happy and normal Mom would be whenever I had a girlfriend? Or you had one?”

Bill sat up a little, rubbing at his face. “Yeah…”

“She’d get completely off our cases. Well, not completely, but close.”

“You want a girlfriend?” Bill sounded weary.

Tom kissed Bill again, this time on the lips. “You know I don’t, don’t say stupid stuff like that.”

Bill tried to smile, but he couldn’t quite get there. He’d always known that when they’d tried being with girls, Tom was better at it than he was. In fact, Tom was good at it. Bill was afraid that Tom would get to be too good at it.

“I’m sorry I’m not a girl, Tomi,” Bill said quietly.

Tom pulled away. “You’d still be my sister, that wouldn’t solve anything.”

Bill’s chin trembled slightly and Tom just sighed, pulling Bill down and curling up with him on the bed. Tom rubbed Bill’s shaking shoulders soothingly, calming him down and kissing his back. Bill looked over his shoulder and smiled a little.

“It has to be you,” he said. “You’ve got to, I don’t know, date a girl for a little.”

"Why me?" Tom asked.

“I’ve never been good at it,” Bill said. “You know that. I just can’t… be convincing. Besides, you’d be insanely jealous if I was with a girl.” Bill nudged Tom and grinned.

Tom just frowned. “You’re the jealous one.”

“Tom, I was just joking,” Bill said.

“I don’t think it’s funny.” Tom pulled away from Bill, but Bill wouldn’t allow it. He wrapped his arms and legs around Tom, the blankets shifting. Bill was still naked, and he pressed their bodies together.

“Don’t be stupid,” Bill said. “You don’t date the girl. Okay? You never date them. You already have that persona… you know. You just…”

“Fuck them?” Tom muttered. “You want me to fuck some girl?”

Bill kissed Tom’s ear. “And then you leave them and you come back to me. Okay?”

“Baby,” Tom sighed. “No. I can’t. That’s too much and I just can’t. How could you live with that? How could I live with that?”

“Tomi,” Bill murmured. He stroked a soft hair on Tom’s forehead and smiled a little. “Okay, okay. Of course I hate it, it sucks. I can’t even think about it. But you know what’s worse?”

Tom nodded heavily, he was developing small dark circles under his eyes and he felt tired. “What if I like it?”

Bill winced. “It’s okay to like it… Just don’t love it.”

“She wouldn’t be you, this is fucked up,” Tom said, shaking his head.

“Tomi…” Bill freed himself from the blankets and stretched his long, nude body out before Tom. Tom looked him over and sighed. “Tomi, it aches.”

Tom touched Bill’s thigh. "Can’t do it, Bill."

“Me or a girl?” Bill asked.

Tom rolled Bill to his back and pushed his own boxers down. “I can only be inside you.”

“Just me?”

Tom nodded and lifted Bill’s legs. “Only you.” He thrust inside, sinking deep, and they both groaned, but didn’t talk anymore.

**

The room was swirling and swaying, and Tom had only been there for about forty minutes. Georg had clapped him on the back and told him he was a man now, and real men did shots. Tom had laughed and agreed, puffed his chest out, and sucked down three bitter shot glasses of vodka.

He raised his beer to his lips and looked around, blinking. He couldn’t exactly remember if Bill had even come out with him. He was at a bar with Georg and Gustav, and many young ladies. Bill was no where in sight.

“Where’s Bill?” Tom slurred, turning to Gustav, and then Georg.

Georg shrugged. “You like that beer? They brew it right in town, I guess.”

Tom made a face, the beer smelled awful. “Bill,” he said again, swallowing hard. “Fuck, my head.”

“He’s going to have the most hilarious hangover tomorrow,” Gustav remarked, easily sipping his dark ale. “Aren’t you, little buddy?”

Tom just scowled and turned around, leaning against the bar on his elbows. He surveyed the club, it was swarming with people, mostly scantily clad girls. He licked his lips and nodded to one of the girls, and she giggled back. Tom smirked, it was too easy.

“Who’s going home with you?” Georg said loudly, nudging Tom.

Tom wrinkled his nose. He was going home to Bill. “Ugh, where is Bill?” he asked again. “I need him.”

“You,” Georg said with a sly grin, “need another shot.”

“That, too!” Tom declared, and took the offered shot glass from Georg. He swallowed it down and felt even better. Soon he was in a booth, surrounded by people. He saw David and Saki and Georg and Gustav and so many girls.

Tom kept drinking, forgetting about Bill. Bill stayed in. That had to be what happened.

Tom didn’t know when it happened, but suddenly he had an armful of girl. And then a mouthful. She was beautiful and smelled good and was scantily clad. Even David patted him on the back.

“Wanna get out of here?” the girl whispered in Tom’s ear, her lips tickling Tom’s neck.

Tom widened his eyes and looked at her, dumbfounded. “What?”

“You’re cute,” she said, tugging on one of his dreads. “And I want you to fuck me.”

Tom nearly choked on his drink. “You want…”

She nodded, eyes flashing. “Come on, let’s go. Your tongue is so good in my mouth, I want to know what else it can do.”

Georg must have heard her and he laughed loudly, glancing at Tom. Tom felt hazy, heavy. Horny. He needed to fuck.

“Uh,” he mumbled. “Where’s Bill?”

“Who cares,” the girl said. “Take me to your room.”

Tom blinked hard and let her kiss him sloppily. “Will Bill be there?”

She laughed and tugged him out the door. “Of course he will.”

Tom smiled and let her haul him into a cab. Bill would be there, that’s who they were going to see. And wasn’t it nice that she was taking him?

Tom held her close the entire ride back, he was just so thankful.

**

Bill wasn’t in the hotel room. The hotel room that they shared. Both beds were empty, or they were until the girl shoved Tom down onto Bill’s.

Tom had a weird thought, how Bill didn’t actually ever sleep in his bed, but his shit was all over it. Tom knocked Bill’s makeup bag to the floor and let the girl take his shirt off.

She had long nails like Bill, and she scraped them down his chest. He hissed in pleasure and confusion, not too stupid to understand where this was leading, but too confused to understand why it was happening. His dick ached and he tugged down the girls panties. He was so wasted he wanted to thrust up into her immediately, with his dick barely out of his pants.

“Bill,” he said, but she clapped a hand over his mouth.

“Need one of these,” she said. She pulled out a condom and stroked it over his cock. Tom hadn’t used a condom in ages, in more than a year, actually. Tom’d fucked his last girlfriend a few times, and they’d used a condom then. Tom hated it.

He let her put it on him and could think only of Bill as her tight heat surrounded him. Why was this happening? Who was she? Where was Bill?

He never wanted anyone other than Bill. Never. He had eyes, girls were pretty, but the whole idea made him sick.

“So wrong,” he moaned out. Yes, this felt good. He grabbed her hips and closed his eyes. Bill was tighter, but he could pretend it was his brother over him. Hot and writhing, riding his dick. Bill was so good at it, knew just how to sway and rock. Knew just when to plunge down and make them both scream.

Tom screamed out in ecstasy as she rode him hard, not catching the confused look on her face as his brother’s name left his lips.

But she was drunk, too, and soon forgot and fucked Tom until they came and passed out on Bill’s bed together. Tom got up early in the morning and threw up even though, and it would shame Georg to know, he didn’t have a hangover.

He looked at the half naked girl in Bill’s bed and had to throw up again.

And where the fuck was Bill?

**

“There he is,” Georg said loudly, looking up from his breakfast. Gustav laughed beside him.

Tom stumbled down to the table where the rest of his band mates were eating the next morning. He rubbed at his forehead and held his middle, he felt awkward and had just kicked a still-drunk girl out of his hotel room. “Ugh,” he mumbled.

He blinked the room into focus and looked at the other end of the table. Bill was sitting there, staring down at his plate.

“Bill,” Tom said, moving toward him.

“Tom, Tom, Tom… That girl…” Georg grinned.

“She was fine,” Gustav said, groaning. “Dragging you out of the club like that.”

“Please tell me you and she, you know,” Georg added. “Oh god, it’ll kill me if you didn’t. I’ll feel like I struck out, too.”

“You did,” Gustav said, smirking.

Tom frowned, still looking at Bill. He knew that Bill knew what had happened. He knew there was no use pretending.

So he just nodded, and sat.

“Fuck,” Georg said, clapping Tom on the shoulder. “Your first groupie. How sweet.”

Tom made a face, feeling sicker than he had in a long time. “Hey,” he said softly to Bill. “Where’d you stay last night?”

Bill finally looked up at Tom, and Tom instantly looked away. He couldn’t take the way Bill’s eyes burned into him. Bill shook his head, got up, and walked out of the room.

Tom sunk in his seat, rubbing at his face.

Knock, Knock (2/3)

Wed, 09 Jan 2008 08:08:52 GMT

Title: Knock, Knock (2/3)
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: All it takes is a knock, and he's as good as laid.

There’s a knock on the door and Tom springs off the bed, grinning. Bill’s quick and Tom isn’t going to complain, he’s horny from just talking to his brother.

Tom doesn’t bother putting a shirt on, what’s the point?, and just walks to the door in his boxers.

“Someone’s eager,” he’s says as he opens the door.

“Ahem.”

Tom’s eyes widen. That’s not Bill on the other side of the door. It’s Saki.

“Um, hey,” Tom mumbles, blushing.

“Good morning,” the tall bodyguard says. “I’ve just gotten a call from Jost. He was able to get you on the first flight to Spain. It leaves in an hour. A car will be here in twenty minutes.”

Tom gapes, frowning. “Right now?”

“Yes.”

“Oh.” Tom nods. “Okay. Did you tell Bill?”

“Yes.”

Tom nods again, Saki is a man of so little words. “Alright… Thanks.”

Saki gives a curt nod and strolls away. Tom shuts the door and curses loudly. “Well, there goes my morning wood,” he says with a sigh.

**

Yes, Jost got them the first flight Spain , but what he’d failed to mention was that the flight was already overbooked and they’d have to cram into business class the entire way there. No relaxing, spacious first class for them.

Tom finds himself seated between Bill and Saki amidst a crowd of tired, cranky passengers trying to beat the worst of the storm. Bill’s not really talking to Tom. In fact, he looks pissed and Tom’s not entirely sure why.

“Bill,” he says, nudging his brother in the arm. Bill can’t be cross about this morning, can he?

“What?” Bill asks, staring out the window.

Tom looks over to Saki, the big guy’s out cold, and he scoots a bit closer to Bill. “Are you pissed?”

Bill sighs. “Maybe.”

“It isn’t my fault about this morning,” Tom says, feeling his face heat up. They haven’t really talked about this. Well, they have, but they were still playing around then.

“What about this morning?” Bill asks. “I’m pissed about you keeping me up all last night.”

Tom’s mouth drops open. “Um…”

“You had some girl in your room,” Bill says. “Jesus, Tom, how do you find a girl in the middle of a freaking flash flood?”

“What?” Tom’s a little slow, he’s not getting it.

“You were fucking some girl lat night, I could hear it all,” Bill says. “What were you doing, killing her?” There’s a sparkle in Bill’s eyes even as he chastises Tom and Tom can’t help but let out a soft chuckle.

“She came to me,” Tom says. “I couldn’t turn her away in a storm.”

“Christ, Tom, you’re such a prick.” Bill smirks. “Just go one day without sex.”

“No,” Tom says plainly.

Bill sighs and leans back, closing his eyes. “Well… I’m going to see if I can get any sleep, unless you plan on fucking someone in the bathroom.”

Tom frowns, confused, but then he lets out a small laugh. “No, I’m good for now.”

Bill chuckles, shaking his head.

**

The plane lands without a hitch and Bill, Tom, and Saki trudge tiredly to the car that will take them to the bungalow in Spain. It’s near noon, the flight had taken longer than expected. When they arrive, Georg and Gustav are lounging in the living room area, looking like they’ve been through the apocalypse. Saki makes sure everything is alright, and then slips away without a word.

“Hey,” Bill says, dropping his bag on the floor. Georg and Gustav don’t move. “Hey?”

Gustav stirs, pulling a pillow off his face. “Oh, fuck.”

“Nice to see you, too.” Tom grins wryly.

“Oh, god,” is all Gustav can say.

“You two look wrecked,” Bill says, sitting down on the couch next to Georg’s lifeless form. He swats at Georg’s legs and Georg flinches.

“Ahh,” Georg groans loudly. “What’s going on?? Oh god, stop yelling. Stop!”

“Dude, you’re the only one talking,” Tom says.

Georg swears and shoves at Bill. “Shut up, Bill.”

“Hey! I didn’t do anything, that was Tom,” Bill says, shoving Georg back. “What the fuck happened to you guys?”

“Vodka,” Gustav says, slumping down further on the couch.

“And girls,” Georg says. “Lots and lots of girls. Fuck, Tom you missed out.”

“It looks like I was lucky to,” Tom says.

Georg laughs. “Oh no, the hangover is worth it, man. So worth it. You fucking missed the best party of the year.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that,” Bill says. “Sounded like Tom had quite the party in his room last night.”

“Are you serious?” Georg asks, sitting up. “You had a girl over in that weather?”

“She just knocked on Tom’s door,” Bill says.

“Bullshit,” Gustav remarks.

Tom shakes his head, staring at Bill. “Um…”

“Was so fucking loud,” Bill says. “She sounded like a cheap whore.”

“Shut up,” Tom finds himself snapping. He flushes, stares at Bill. “She was unbelievable.”

“They were hotter here,” Georg says.

“They don’t come much hotter than I had last night,” Tom replies, ducking his head. He can’t look at Bill anymore. “She… wasn’t wearing any panties.”

Georg’s jaw drops. “Yeah right.”

“So, she was a whore,” Bill says, nudging Tom in the arm.

“Nah, she was just…” Tom feels so stupid talking about this in front of Bill, also, he feels a little proud. “She was just naughty, not at all whorish. Fuckin’ skirt was so short I could see everything. And she had the perfect tits.”

Gustav laughs. “I think Tom was so sad and lonely last night that he hallucinated the perfect girl.”

“I wasn’t hallucinating,” Tom shoots back. “I hope I can see her again.”

“Oooh, sounds serious,” Bill says. He grins at Tom. “So, who’s going shopping with me?”

All three boys groan. “I’m not moving from this couch,” Georg whines. “Unless there’s tits involved.”

“Well, Georg, I may not have the perfect tits like Tom’s dream girl, but that never seemed to bother you before,” Bill says slyly.

Georg groans and hides his head under a pillow. Gustav laughs until he looks like he might throw up.

And Tom frowns.

“I’m going back to bed,” Tom says. He doesn’t look at Bill. “Get rested up for tonight, we’re going out!”

“I’m not.” Bill smiles sweetly.

Tom looks at him. “Gonna stay home and paint your nails?”

“Yup,” Bill replies evenly.

“You should come out.”

Bill shakes his head. “I’m going shopping now. By myself, I guess.” He gives one last surveying look over the boys and gets no response. He sighs and rolls his eyes. “See you guys later.”

Tom watches Bill drag his suitcase away, his eyes focusing on Bill’s ass. He clears his throat and looks away, trying not to think about how he knows exactly what Bill’s ass feels like. He’s horny, he must be. He thinks about all the hot girls Georg was talking about. They’ll be at the club tonight for sure.

Gustav yawns loudly, pulling Tom from his thoughts. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

“What now?” Georg moans.

“I’m hungry and I gotta take a piss,” Gustav replies.

“Sucks.”

“Mm.” Gustav rolls on his back and Tom lets out a loud laugh.

“You guys,” he declares, “are idiots. I’m going to go pass out for a few hours.”

“I’m hungry,” Gustav says again, weakly.

Tom grins and hauls his bag to his room. He still feels good, and the clubs are waiting for him. He has no doubt he’ll get laid a second time in as many nights.

**

For some reason Tom can’t get drunk, which is sort of weird. No, it’s really weird. He’s in a packed club, surrounded by hot girls and loaded shots, and they’re playing all of his favorite songs.

He’s got two of his best friends by his side and the chances of getting laid are… Well, there’s no chance he’s not going to get laid.

The blonde on his lap’s already let him go to third base, she’s not wearing any panties and the fact that Tom doesn’t find that more appealing is killing him.

It’s because he’s thinking about something else. Someone else.

Bill. Duh.

Bill without any panties. Little Bill with no ass and no tits.

‘Jesus,’ he thinks, looking down at his cell phone and stopping himself from picking it up for the thousandth time that night.

The blonde cuddles closer, invites his hands to smooth up her naked thighs, and licks a hot trail up his throat. “I’m so wet,” she says, and Tom can barely understand her English, but he knows it’s better than her German. She’s wet, he knows that, too. He had two fingers in her in the bathroom.

He nudges her aside, just a bit, and picks up his phone. She laughs and tries to bat his hand away, but he just keeps staring at the little screen. “Tom,” the blonde girl breathes. “Let’s go dance.”

Tom shakes his head. “Hang on.” He flips the phone open and types, kinda bord here. whatre you doin?

He sends it to Bill.

“Tom,” the blonde says again, poking his side. “You want to get out of here? My friend over there… She’d want to come, too.”

Tom looks up. Indeed she does have a friend over there, a very eager looking brunette with a very low-cut shirt on. “Oh,” Tom mumbles. He’s certainly not drunk enough for a Spanish threesome. And from the looks of these girls, he’d have to be pretty drunk to reach a comfortable level of confidence. “Fuck, hang on again.”

His phone had vibrated in his hand, and he sees that he has one new text message. He reads, well aftr u ditchd me this morning im surprised u even textd me at all. what the fuk? havent u left the country yet?

Tom stares at the text dumbly. huh? he texts back to his brother.

The blonde gets a quick grope in before Tom’s phone vibrates again. dont act like u’ve forgot me already. Tom scrolls down on the little screen. u said i have a nice pussy remembr? u know, i dont think u’re my favorit in the band anymor

Tom gulps, almost drops the phone. So Bill’s playing again? why? he texts back.

This time, Bill texts back very quickly. georg wud nevr leav me like u did

Tom can’t believe he actually feels a pang of jealousy at that. He looks at the girl by his side and tells her he needs to take a piss. She tries to follow him as he stands, but he tells her that no, he really does need to piss.

Once in the bathroom he takes his phone out and types with clumsy fingers. Bill’s already got him hard, just with the game he’s playing.

georg couldnt make you scream like i did

It’s bold, but he knows Bill will respond to that. He’s right, the text comes back fast.

hmmm u dont kno that

Tom does know that. He’d heard Bill with Georg, and Georg has nothing on him. Sure, Bill had obviously been having a good time with the bassist, but Bill sure as fuck didn’t make the same noises he’d made with Tom.

sounds like a challenge, Tom finally sends to Bill. He waits a few minutes with no reply and then sends another, too much for you? tell me what youre doin.

Instantly, before Tom even shuts his phone, it lights up. thinkin about gettin on my knees for u

Tom raises his eyebrows and cups his crotch. sounds like a good time.

im all wet for u - ooo..

waht?? Tom types back furiously. ffuck, wanna fuck you.

i kno.. was just thinkin about that

Tom bites his lip, he’s so worked up. Picturing Bill from last night… It’s almost too much. whatre you wearin?, Tom types. He can’t even be articulate anymore.

A few minutes go by. Tom thinks Bill’s given up and he’s just about to leave the bathroom when the phone vibrates again. Tom looks at it and gasps.

skirt - shortr than last night. if you cn believe. O - stockings. panties this time, dont get excitd. u hard yet?

bullshit!! Tom sends back. He knows Bill’s putting him on, but he sweats anyway.

fine fine. guess u’ll nevr kno

Tom has to get out of the bathroom. It’s too stuffy and he needs distraction, like those two girls out there. It’s time to get drunk and have a Spanish threesome. His phone vibrates again.

anyway - are u hard yet? wish u were in town, im sooo lonely

Tom swears. He needs to stop this. It’s dumb. There’s actual girls out there with real tits and fucking amazing asses. But that doesn’t make Tom’s blood boil, that doesn’t make his palms sweat and his groin ache.

And his groin is aching.

Tom texts Bill back, his hands shaking. maybe your in my town.

It doesn’t take long for a response. maybe.. u shud find out. find out befor i text georg

yea right, he texts back.

i hav his number u kno. i stole it from ur cell after u passd out

Tom almost scowls, he’s entirely through bantering about Georg. He groans and types, where are you

Outside of the bathroom it’s noisy, people shouting, music thumping, bodies dancing. Tom hardly hears any of it, all he’s aware of is his phone, and the things Bill is saying. His phone vibrates.

im just waiting for u, arent u bored? are the girls ther hottr than me?

Tom freezes, his thumb positioned over the keys. Bill’s waiting for him, or is he still playing? Does Bill actually want Tom to…

He takes a deep breath and types, no ones hotter than you.. im comin to find you ok?

And Tom is startled by the amount of truth in the text message. It’s true, none of the girls in the club even measure up to Bill. Tom knows it’s fucked up, Bill isn’t even a real girl. Bill’s his brother. The more Tom thinks about it, though, the harder he gets. His phone shakes in his pocket but he doesn’t check it, he’s got to move fast.

He flees the bathroom and walks quickly toward the club exit. Georg bellows at him but Tom ignores his friend. He can’t explain why he’s leaving, so he’s just going to leave. No questions asked, no questions answered. Everyone wins.

Tom fidgets the whole car ride back. He’s turning his phone over and over in his hands, it’s still heavy with one new text message. He checks it - ok hurry, you made me so hot - and sighs, frustrated and horny. He’s going to get laid tonight, and it’s going to be amazing.

When he reaches the bungalow he’s even harder. He’s stopped himself from texting Bill back, he knows that can’t end well, he doesn’t want to get too riled up.

“Hello?” he calls out as he opens the front door. The house is dark, all the lights out, and Tom walks through the living room. “Anyone here?”

His phone vibrates; he has a text. youre here is all it says.

Tom glances into the kitchen and texts Bill back. where are you?

The response is immediate. come find me

Tom walks up the stairs, peeks down the hall at Bill’s room. The door is slightly open and he licks his lips. im comin.

The phone doesn’t vibrate so Tom knows Bill can hear him. He drops his phone in his pocket and strolls to Bill’s room. He doesn’t even know, just pushes through the door and grins.

At nothing. Bill isn’t there.

“Fuck,” Tom mutters. Where is Bill? Tom pulls his phone out of his pocket again and texts, where the hell areyou?

Almost instantly, right where ud want me to be - hury your to slow, im soo ready

Tom palms his crotch through his jeans and groans. Is Bill even in the house? He suddenly has a thought - Bill says he’s right where Tom wants him to be.

Tom hurries toward his own room and barges through the door. His jaw drops when he sees what’s waiting for him.

Bill, on the bed, scantily clad with a mischievous expression on his face. And fuck, he’s wearing…

“Hi,” Bill says softly. “Didn’t think you’d make it.”

Tom’s mouth is still hanging open. Bill’s in all black, slinky as fuck in a tight t-shirt and a tiny pleated black skirt. It’s so tiny that Tom can see Bill’s ass. And under the skirt, Bill’s wearing black thigh high stockings.

“Um,” Tom says dumbly.

“Took you long enough,” Bill says. He’s lying on his belly, sprawled across Tom’s bed and when he shifts, Tom can see more of his ass. Bill has his cell phone in his hand and he looks down at it, typing in a message with his long, perfectly manicured fingers.

Tom realizes what Bill did when he went shopping. He’d gotten a manicure and a skirt.

‘And those fucking stockings,’ Tom thinks. He wants to step forward and stroke his hands up Bill’s legs, peel the stockings down and bite at his thighs. His phone vibrates.

“Gonna get that?” Bill asks. He drops the phone and smoothes down his long, straight hair. Tom can’t stop staring; his brother is so fucking attractive. How can a boy be this fucking attractive?

He doesn’t even have tits.

“Um,” Tom says again. He flips his phone open, reads the message.

im already wet

That’s it. Tom drops his phone and crosses over to the bed. “On your back,” he says.

Bill smiles, lips glistening with some shiny gloss, and he does. Tom leans his knees against the bed and pulls at his hair, taking his hat off and dropping his keys on the floor. Bill looks up at him with wide, innocent eyes. Tom almost scoffs; there’s nothing innocent about Bill, nothing.

Bill sits up, leaning back on the heels of his hands, and knits his eyebrows. “I was waiting forever for you, and when I heard you were in town again…”

“Yeah,” is all Tom can say. He touches Bill’s shoulder and something electric flows through his limbs. Bill just smirks. “How’d you get in here?”

“I have my ways.” Bill’s eyes become dark. “Am I in trouble?”

“Maybe.” Tom circles the bed, trying to decide how he wants Bill. “Stand up, I want to see you.”

Bill does, smoothing his tiny skirt down as he rises from the bed and stands with his back to Tom. Tom almost groans, those stockings are deadly. Fucking deadly. Bill looks phenomenal, not at all ridiculous. Sure, Tom wants to rip all of the clothes off him, but they look good. The skirt is sleek and short, and Bill’s long legs are only somehow longer in those stockings.

“Did you dress up just for me?” Tom asks, feeling his cheeks flush. He’s got to keep it together, this is their game. “Because you look… amazing.”

“Better than your club girls?” Bill bats his eyelashes.

“Fuck… So much better,” Tom breathes. He’s got to touch Bill. He reaches his hands out to touch, to stroke down Bill chest, or arms, or anything, but Bill ducks away. “Come on,” Tom says, voice dangerously low. “I wanna…”

Bill grins. “I know that look. You’re just going to toss me back on the bed and ruin all of my plans, aren’t you?”

Tom’s running on some strange need, and he just nods dumbly, moving closer to Bill. The stockings are just barely black, and Tom imagines licking at Bill’s skin through them.

Bill smiles again, his lips shining. “Well, forget that,” he says. “We’re doing it my way this time.” Bill gets close, nudges Tom back to the bed. “Sit.”

“But…”

“I want to suck you,” Bill says. “And I want you to come in me and on me. And then I want to get you hard again. And then…”

Tom sits, grabs Bill around the thighs. The silk stockings whisper against his fingers. “And then I fuck you.”

Bill nods once. “And then you fuck me.”

“You wanna do all that?” Tom squeezes Bill’s thighs, pressing his fingers against the skin. Bill leans against Tom, pressing his stomach to Tom’s face. Tom breathes in, Bill smells better than a girl. “Let me see you again. Go over there.”

Bill takes a step back, lips curling in a tiny smile. “What do you want to see?”

“Your ass,” Tom says bluntly. “Your ass in that skirt.”

Bill backs up a few feet from Tom and turns around. He looks over his shoulder and blinks. “Like this?”

Tom gapes openly at his brother’s ass. He can see the soft skin peeking out from under the pleats. “Bend a little,” Tom says softly.

“Oh,” Bill says, a slightly scandalized expression on his face. “But then you’d see my-”

“Yeah,” Tom says quickly. “Come on. I want to see.”

Bill slowly bends at the waist a little, just enough so that his skirt lifts and Tom has a clear view of the bottom of his ass. Tom swallows hard. “Nice,” he manages, because yes, Bill has a really nice ass.

“Thanks,” Bill says, standing up straight again and turning around. “But that’s all you get.”

Tom raises his eyebrows as Bill advances on him. “What’s that mean?”

“I said I wanted to suck you, I can still taste you from last night,” Bill says quietly. “It’s been on my lips all day, I want more.” He frowns. “But I thought you’d never call me again.”

Tom raises a brow. “You’re the one who said it was just one night, you know.”

“Now it’s two,” Bill says, and slowly sinks to his knees, right between Tom’s legs. Tom leans back a bit on his hands, and opens his legs. “Mmm, good.” Bill runs his hands up Tom’s legs, from his knees to his hips and sighs out heavily.

He smiles, ducks his head almost in a shy manner, and kisses the pulse point in Tom’s neck.

“You smell so good,” Bill breathes out. He opens his mouth, sucks on the skin and drags his teeth down Tom’s throat. His hands clench at Tom’s waist and he moans. “Tomi, you always smell so good.”

‘Always?’ Tom thinks. He isn’t sure if Bill’s playing their game right now, but he finds he doesn’t care as Bill’s hands move to the aching bulge in his pants. He squeezes Tom’s cock, strokes it like he’s going to jerk him off right through his jeans.

“Want me to take it out?” Bill asks, right against Tom’s throat. The heat from his mouth, the slide of his lips, sticky with gloss, makes Tom’s cock leap.

“Take… take it out,” Tom says. He slides a hand through Bill’s soft hair.

Bill pulls back, palms Tom’s cock. “Okay.”

Tom leans on his elbows and watches Bill’s hands, they’re gliding over his jeans and pressing in gently. The moment is heavy and somehow more intense than the night before. They’re both sober, both well aware of what’s going on. Tom’d had a couple of drinks at the club but nothing with the intent of forgetting.

He’s looking at Bill with clear eyes, his baby brother Bill who is all dressed up for him, and those stockings…

Tom puts a hand on Bill’s shoulder and flinches, Bill’s fumbling with the zip on his jeans. Bill’s cool fingers graze Tom’s warm belly, tickling the fine hairs there. Tom takes a deep breath, Bill’s fingers are quick and soft.

Soon Tom is exposed, and Bill smiles slyly and presses a kiss just to the head of Tom’s erection. Tom is hard, very, very hard, and he groans at the gentle touch. Bill’s tongue flicks out and laps at the slit, a long, hot lick.

“Jesus,” Tom says. His hand moves up Bill’s neck and then cradles the back of his head. “Bill…”

Bill strokes Tom twice and backs off a bit. “I need to get a little more comfortable.”

Tom is confused, but tries to move up on the best further, to let Bill off the floor, but Bill stops him.

“Stay,” Bill says. Tom does and Bill stands, reaching over to the bedside table. It’s then that Tom realizes Bill’s white Prada bag is on the table, and Bill reaches a delicate hand into it. He pulls out a small tube of lip gloss and unscrews the cap slowly.

“What… are you doing?” Tom asks.

Bill coats his lips and presses his lips together. He doesn’t say anything and applies another layer of gloss. The way Bill lets his tongue dart out to taste the gloss is so sinful Tom’s cock leaps.

Bill sets the tube down and turns to Tom, putting one stocking covered foot on the bed beside Tom’s legs. He still doesn’t talk as he rolls back the top of his stocking, exposing a sliver of pale, soft skin.

Tom swallows hard and Bill rolls the stocking down further, past his knee and to his ankle. He slides the stocking off his foot and Tom cannot help himself, he has to touch. He presses his palm against Bills calve and tickles his fingers up behind Bill’s knee.

Bill sighs and sets his foot down on the floor, the stocking hanging from his fingers.

“No touching,” Bill says. “Yet.” He lifts his other foot to the bed and removes that stocking, too.

“What’s the point?” Tom mumbles, staring openly. He’d been hoping Bill would keep those stockings on, they’re really something. Bill just shakes his head and smiles, his glossy lips shining. “God, what are you doing? Trying to kill me?”

“No, I’m your biggest fan,” Bill says, eyes sparkling. “I’m trying to seduce you.”

It’s working. It’s really working. Tom just lets his mouth hang open. Bill smoothes his skirt down in the front and smirks, holding the stocking in his hand. He’s petting it, smoothing it out. Tom wants to grab Bill and throw him on the mattress, but he knows Bill has plans.

Bill kneels again, between Tom’s legs, and breathes hotly on Tom’s cock. “So hard, for me?” he asks sweetly. He squeezes the cock lightly and Tom groans. “You’ve got a really, really nice dick.”

Tom almost chokes. “Yeah?” he manages. Bill looks up at him with smoky eyes and laps at the head of Tom’s cock. Tom moans lowly and tenses his legs, he can’t take this slow seduction. He’s always been fast, not really one for lasting foreplay or romance. This isn’t romance - he doesn’t quite know what it is.

Bill sucks his cock into his mouth and licks all around the head, wetting it. Tom lets out a loud cry. “Fuck, Bill!” he hisses. Bill pulls back, brows creased in confusion. “No, no - don’t fucking stop.”

Bill grins, his lips caressing Tom’s arousal. “I need to stop,” Bill says. Tom waits for Bill to giggle and suck him back in, but he doesn’t.

“Seriously?” Tom asks.

Bill nods and tugs at the waist of Tom’s jeans. “I need these off.”

“And then…?”

Bill doesn’t respond, just tugs harder at Tom’s pants. Tom moves his hips up, allows Bill to drag them off his body, along with his boxers. Bill stares at him, grinning the sort of grin that makes Tom’s cock throb harder and his heart beat faster.

“You’re being tricky,” Tom says.

“How do you know?” Bill’s hands are on his thighs, the silk stockings wrapped around his hands.

“You’re doing that little smile thing,” Tom says. “Like you always do when you want to get your way.”

Bill shakes his head. “You don’t know me.”

It’s then that Tom remembers they’re playing, still. This isn’t Bill, it’s his groupie. Tom doesn’t know intimate details about ‘her’.

“You look like you get your way a lot with that smile,” Tom says with a shrug.

Bill smiles wider. “I do.” He stares at Tom and slowly unwraps one of the stockings from his hand. “Soft, right?” Bill lets the foot of the stocking tickle at Tom’s belly.

Tom shivers and nods.

“Real silk,” Bill coos. “Feels so nice on my legs.” The stocking slips over the head of Tom’s erection and he groans, arches up into the touch. “Bet it’d feel really nice… other places.”

“Other places?”

Bill dips his head and licks right up the entire length of Tom’s dick, stops at the head to suck it into his mouth. “Mmm.”

Tom thinks he’s about to get the blow job he’s wanted, but Bill pulls back again, still smiling, and very gently wraps the silk stocking around his dick. The fabric makes him shiver and squirm, and Bill pulls it tighter around his erection, just the head of it poking through the silk.

“How does that feel?” Bill strokes him roughly, the stockings moving over him in such a confusing, delicious way.

He all but yells out in response.

“Good?”

Tom swears and Bill pumps him again, pumps his dick until the exposed head is wet and dripping. Bill nudges it with his nose and strokes Tom hard. The silk feels almost as good as Bill’s mouth, almost as good as Bill’s ass.

“Fuck, fuck,” Tom gasps out. He arches into it and lets his head fall back. “Fuck.”

And then Tom feels Bill’s glossy, sticky lips on the head of his dick. He can smell the sweet flavor of the lip gloss, can feel the lips slip and slide over the sensitive head of his erection. It’s torture.

“Smeared my lip gloss,” Bill murmurs. “Might have to reapply.” He reaches for his bag and Tom grabs his wrist, twists it a little. Bill moans at the rough contact.

“No, fuck, no,” Tom says. “Suck me.”

Bill’s eyes widen and he lets out a delighted little laugh. “Kiss your mother with that mouth?”

“Umm,” Tom mumbles, not a coherent thought in his mind. He tugs Bill’s head forward, gesturing for him to start sucking. Bill wrinkles his nose prettily and gives the stocking a little pull. Tom draws his a sharp breath. Bill is teasing him in ways that no girl ever has.

Bill licks at the slit of Tom’s cock, massaging the length. Tom wants to close his eyes and lean back, but the view is too good. He’s never seen anything hotter than his brother’s mouth attached to his dick.

One of Bill’s hands move to fumble with Tom’s balls. Tom groans, it’s too good. Bill knows what he’s doing, which is a lot more than could be said for the girls he’s been with. Bill knows what it takes to get a man off, he knows the moves, he has quick fingers. Tom is very thankful for this, but he can no longer mentally play their game anymore. It’s not a groupie sucking his dick, it’s his baby brother Bill.

His baby brother Bill with the incredibly gifted tongue.

Bill squeezes Tom’s cock and shimmies the silk around the length, causing Tom to gasp in delight. It’s such a curious feeling, he can almost feel his cock swelling inside the silk. Bill’s got his lips wrapped around the head now, and he’s sucking powerfully. Tom is near losing his mind.

Bill’s lips leave him, but he continues pumping at Tom’s cock. “Don’t kiss your mother, then?” Bill asks, his lips shining. “How about your brother?”

Tom growls, hoping Bill will get back to business. “No.”

“No? But he’s so pretty, don’t you think?” Bill tugs on Tom’s dick with enough force to almost drag an orgasm out of him.

“Shit! What? Ugh, Bill…”

Bill laughs, a teasing sound, and sucks on the head. He says, between soft licks, “I bet I give better head.”

“Than who?” Tom manages to get out.

Bill sucks him deep, pushing the stockings back and swallowing the length down his throat. Tom can’t help it, he groans and comes in Bill’s mouth. It’s such an intense feeling, a sudden flash of pleasure and then Tom is spent and lying back on the bed.

Bill licks at him a bit more, rubbing at his balls and thighs with the stocking, and then crawls up his body.

“I bet I give better head than your brother,” Bill says, and kisses Tom hard.

Tom just nods weakly, the game they’re playing has no boundaries or rules anymore. They pull away and stare at each other, breathing heavily for a few moments. Tom slides a hand down Bill’s back and tugs at the hem of his tight shirt.

“I wanna see your tits again,” Tom says, leaning up on his elbows. “Show me your tits.”

Bill cocks his head and sits up. “I need more lip gloss.”

“Fuck the lip gloss,” Tom says. “I want to see your tits.”

Bill smirks, getting off the bed and going to dig around in his bag again. He pulls out the tube of shimmery lip gloss and coats it on his lips again. “Give me a second.”

Tom watches Bill slowly put the tube of gloss back in the bag and then he stands up tall, and elegantly pulls the tight black shirt up and over his head. He tosses it on the floor and takes a couple of steps toward Tom, hips popped out.

“Like what you see?” Bill puts a hand on his hip and rubs at one of his nipples, and then pinches it. “You like my tits, right?”

“Oh god,” Tom murmurs. It’s the ultimate mind fuck. Of course Bill doesn’t have tits. Of course he’s just a flat-chested boy, but at that moment, Tom truly thinks Bill has the best tits he’s ever seen. “Come here.”

Bill takes a few more steps, still pinching his nipple with a thumb and index finger. “Look at you,” he says. “You look like someone just sucked the life out of you.”

Tom gestures with his finger and pats his thigh. “Come here.”

Bill spreads his legs and straddles Tom, kneeling over him and settling on his lap. Tom sits up and kisses Bill hard, getting a mouthful of lip gloss. “What is that?” Tom mumbles when they pull apart.

Bill cocks his head to the side. “Hmm?”

“That taste?” Tom licks at his lips and Bill connects their mouths again.

“What does it taste like?” Bill asks. He drags his thumb across Tom’s lower lip, smearing the gloss down onto Tom’s chin. He looks at his thumb for a moment and then cheekily rubs it against his right nipple. “Taste.”

Tom knows what to do, but Bill puts a sticky hand in Tom’s hair and forces him to his chest. Tom sucks the nipple into his mouth, tastes the gloss on it and groans. He’s getting hard again, definitely.

“Strawberry,” he says as he pulls away, smacking his lips.

“And?” Bill asks.

Tom laps at Bill’s nipple again, enjoying as his brother squirms. He nips at the nipple, then sucks it into his mouth.

“It’s kiwi,” Bill gasps out. “Oh, Jesus… Tom!”

“Fuck,” Tom hisses, biting down on the nipple gently and then pulling back. “Bill… I need to fuck you.”

Bill shakes his head. “No, I’ve got other plans.”

“What??”

Bill has a little smile on his face as he pulls back and strokes Tom’s hair. “I let you be selfish so far. So selfish.”

“What?” Tom asks again.

“I went down on you,” Bill says. “Twice. And what have I gotten?”

Tom’s mouth goes dry. Surely Bill doesn’t want him to suck his…

“Nothing,” Bill goes on. “You’re kind of a pig, Tom. What am I going to tell my girlfriends?”

Tom stares dumbly at Bill. “I don’t know.”

Bill rolls onto his stomach and kicks his feet up, looking over his shoulder. “You know what I mean?”

Bill’s skirt rides up, exposing just a bit of his ass again, and, much to Tom’s shock, the smallest bit of black silk. Bill’s wearing panties and for whatever reason it’s more scandalous than him not wearing anything.

“Fucking hell,” Tom swears, and pushes Bill’s skirt up more. The panties are a simple pair of boyshorts, cut just right, exposing Bill’s ass in a delightful way. Bill wiggles his hips and Tom knows what Bill wants. He thinks he can do it, too, just watching Bill move on the bed has made him confident.

He squeezes Bill’s ass, presses a finger under the panty and down his crease.

“Oh,” Bill breathes out. “Oh, yes.”

“You want me to eat you out,” Tom says bluntly.

Bill nods, actually blushing a bit. It gives Tom more confidence, knowing that Bill still has the ability to blush. It’s attractive, the modesty of panties and the tint of pink in Bill’s cheeks. Bill’s never looked hotter.

Tom pushes the silky garment aside, exposing Bill’s pale, delicious ass. It’s perfect, and so clean looking. Tom wants to devour it whole, inhale it and lick it. He takes a deep breath and explores Bill’s hole with a finger first. Bill moans softly and squirms, and Tom grins. He can do this.

He wants to do this.

He growls and tugs the panties down, staring at Bill’s bare ass. The panties slide down Bill’s legs, resting behind his knees. Bill looks over his shoulder and makes a soft, purring noise.

“I’m nice and clean for you,” Bill says.

Tom nods, still staring. “You always are.”

“Not for you,” Bill counters.

Tom spreads Bill’s ass, aching as he sees the small, pink hole. He’s definitely an ass man, but he’s never really given one so much attention until now.

“Nice,” Tom murmurs, licking his lips. He’s never done this to anyone before. He figures it’s got to be just like going down on a girl, maybe better. Bill smells delicious, and there’s this heat coming from his body. “You want this?”

Bill looks over his shoulder, he’s a writhing mess. “Are you kidding? Why do you think I sucked your dick twice?”

Tom laughs and exhales, his breath blowing against Bill’s ass. Bill squirms and arches his back, pushing his ass closer to Tom’s face.

“Oh, do it,” Bill moans. “I bet you’re good with your tongue.”

Tom is. He’s been told it before by many girls. In fact, he’s developed quite a bit of a reputation in that department. He’s an amazing fuck, all right, but he can do fuckin’ magic with his mouth.

Tom licks right up Bill’s ass, tastes Bill’s skin and groans. Bill’s sweet, musky, and delicious, just as Tom knew he’d be. He licks down, stops at Bill’s hole and gives it a kiss.

“Bill, you’re…” He licks again. “Mmm.”

Bill just moans in response, his face smashing into the pillow, his ass pressing back into Tom’s face. Tom resists the push and pushes right back, planting his face in the crease of Bill’s ass and sucking in powerfully. Bill yelps and jerks forward, reaching out and grabbing a fistful of blanket.

Tom pushes his tongue forward, breeching Bill’s body, sinking inside. Bill vibrates and cries out, his lower back glistens with sweat. Tom holds his waist firmly, stroking the soft skin with his thumbs. He’s licking Bill’s hole hard, and he likes it. Bill tastes just as good as he smells. “Mm,” Tom mumbles against Bill’s ass. “Mmfh, Bill.”

“Oh god, Tom,” Bill moans softly. “Lick… Oh god, your tongue…”

A surge of pride flows through Tom, somehow he had been determined to impress Bill with his skills.

And Bill is clearly impressed. He sinks further to the mattress, just his ass in the air, and pants. “Oh, Tomi. Yes. Please. Ohhhh…”

Tom holds Bill’s hips and thrust his tongue in and out, opening Bill up. He’s so tight, and Tom works him with a fervent passion. He loves the taste and way Bill moves against him. He has Bill, he knows he can make him come, too.

Bill is obviously very easily stimulated this way, Tom knows he won’t have to touch Bill anywhere else to make him reach his climax. But does he want Bill to do it now, or does he want to wait until he’s writhing on the end of his dick?

Tom’s cock throbs at the thought and he sinks his tongue deeper.

“Fuck!” Bill cries out. His legs shift further apart and he practically vibrates underneath Tom. “Please, just a bit more…”

Tom pulls back and Bill whines. “Quiet,” Tom says, and slaps Bill’s ass with a sharp smack. Bill squeals and looks over at Tom.

“Why did you stop?”

Tom grins. He’s hard again, and ready to fuck. “Got lube in that purse of yours?”

Bill’s entire body shakes. He doesn’t respond, but reaches over to his bag and pulls out a small tube. “Don’t fuck around,” Bill says. “Just put it in.”

Tom grabs the tube and pops the cap off. “Hands on the bed,” Tom says.

Bill laughs. “You think I’m just going to listen to what you say? Just because you’re in some band?”

“Your favorite band,” Tom says. He puts a hand on Bill’s back and pushes down. “Hands on the bed.”

Bill sighs but puts hands on the mattress, dipping down a bit. “What are you…?”

Tom grins, finds one of the silk stockings among the blankets and hunches over Bill’s back. He wraps the stocking around Bill’s wrist, as tight as he dares, and ties Bill’s hands together, behind his back. Bill looks over his shoulder, panting, trembling. Tom’s completely taken by the sight before him but he keeps a hardened expression on. He’s got to do this, not think about it. He wants this. Bill’s ass is the hottest thing he’s seen in a while.

His cock throbs hotly and he leans forward, squeezing some of the cool lube into the palm of his hand. He remembers what fucking Bill was like; it wasn’t even twenty four hours ago. He thinks that maybe Bill can still feel it, maybe he’s still a little loose from the reaming he’d gotten last night. The thought makes Tom hot, he throws the tube aside and slicks the slippery substance up and down his cock.

“God, what’s taking so long?” Bill whines, squirming in his silk restraints. “Did you think I’d go somewhere? This is…” He twists around helplessly. “This is stupid.”

“I want you to really feel it,” is all Tom says. He taps a lubed finger against Bill’s hole and Bill draws in a sharp breath and tenses. “Yeah, see? You’re going to remember this one.”

“I remember the other one,” Bill replies, relaxing his body. “You’re gonna have to top it, you know?”

Tom grins, smacks Bill on the ass again, pleased as the creamy skin becomes pink. “Yeah, don’t worry.”

Tom slips his fingers in and Bill collapses forward even more, his hands still bound. “Oh… Jesus…”

Bill’s burning hot inside and just as tight as he’d been the night before. Tom groans and thrust his fingers in hard and rough and Bill sounds like he’s already there. He’s moaning like a whore, and Tom knows he isn’t. That makes it even better as Bill writhes against him.

“Tomi, deeper,” Bill gasps out. “Touch it.”

Tom touches Bill’s spot, already knows just how to find it, and Bill shakes and his fingers tense in the sheets. He struggles against the stockings, makes a surprised noise and Tom knows Bill didn’t know how tightly Tom had tied him.

“Do you want me to make you come this way?” Tom asks, kissing Bill’s naked back.

“Just…” Bill squirms, his whole body flinching as Tom’s lips drag down his spine. “Just… fuck me, okay?”

Heat flares in Tom’s belly. He lifts his head, licking a stripe up Bill’s back once more. “That’s pretty slutty. Are you going to beg?”

“Um.” Bill looks at Tom, his eyes are dark and he’s not messing around. “Fuck, if it means you’ll fuck me, I’ll beg.”

Tom tenses his fingers in Bill, scissors them against the heat. “Your cunt’s pretty wet, I just have to know that you want it.”

“I want your dick,” Bill whines, shaking and sweating. “In me. Okay? Fuck… Fuck, my hands.”

Tom laughs, strokes Bill’s hair and grabs him by the hip with one hand. “Yeah, you’re a slut. Alright, I’m going to fuck you, I guess.”

“You guess?” Bill pushes his ass toward Tom, forcing Tom’s finger to touch his spot again. “Oh… God…”

“Is that good?” Tom grips Bill’s hip more firmly and pulls his finger out with an audible pop. Bill groans and arches back, into Tom again, struggling with his bound wrists. Tom almost wants to free him, he can imagine those perfectly manicured hands all over him, scratching him, stroking him…

He shakes his head and takes Bill’s other hip. His finger is wet, itching to go back in Bill, but his cock is even more desperate. He grabs the lube and slicks up his cock, wincing as he does, he’s so sensitive. Bill pushes back and his ass collides with the swollen head of Tom’s cock and he just about loses it.

“Bill,” he hisses. He grabs Bill hips with strong hands and without a moment’s hesitation, thrusts smoothly into him. It’s bliss inside of Bill, he groans and Bill whimpers. Tom hunches over Bill, not moving, feeling Bill clench around his dick. “Fuck. Fuck!”

“Ohhhh…” Bill’s face is against the mattress, his hands reaching forward. “Why do you… make me feel this way… fuck!”

Tom pulls back and thrusts forward. “Shit! Bill…” He can’t stop, for a moment he can’t even think if it’s good for Bill. He just fucks him, grabs his ass and pounds inside.

Bill’s making mewling sounds, moaning out shamelessly and jerking his bound hands around. Tom digs his fingers in the soft flesh of Bill’s ass and holds his cock in, clenching his jaw. Bill’s squeezing the fuck out of him, it’s so good he almost can’t take it. Bill’s making him see stars.

Tom pulls out and them pushes back in roughly, jagged movements causing the both of them to groan loud. Tom wipes some sweat off his forehead and drags his knuckles down Bill’s back, feeling the heat coming right off his skin. He’s fucking Bill harder than he even knew he was capable, Bill’s head is snapping back and Tom’s hips are pressing flush against Bill’s ass.

He’s almost exploding, almost collapsing and giving up. It’s too good. “Fuck, this,” Tom breathes, “you’re so fucking tight.”

“I…” Bill tenses around Tom, bending his head down and almost doubling over. He squeezes his thighs together and Tom feels Bill’s toes curling against his skin. “I’m so close, fuck, you’re hitting… You’re so in…”

“Are you?” Tom pushes some hair off his wet forehead and thrusts deeply, with purpose, he’s chasing his orgasm and he’s so close to catching it.

“Just a bit more,” Bill moans. Tom grunts and reaches forward, over Bill’s shoulder and grabs at the stocking around Bill’s wrists. He pulls up, jerks Bill’s hands over his head, bending his arms back, just behind his neck.

They straighten, Bill’s back against Tom’s chest. Bill’s skirt flutters down, brushing against the base of Tom’s dick and they both shudder.

“Yes, oh fuck yes,” Bill moans out. Tom nips at Bill’s throat, thrusts forward again and Bill keens. “Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me!”

Tom fucks him hard, bites his throat. It’s almost painful, but he can feel it. He can feel that familiar tingling, the swirling in his belly. He’s going to come, hard, inside of Bill. He’ll fill Bill up and press inside him, holding their bodies close together, savoring the feeling. Tom knows he’s not going to get a fuck as good as Bill in a long while, he’s got to remember this.

Bill moans loud, one last time, and jerks forward. He comes powerfully, Tom can smell his release and he licks his lips. He can still taste Bill.

“Fuck, keep going,” Bill says, his voice muffled and his face curtained by by hair. Tom can barely hear him, he’s thrusting hard inside Bill, his feet are on fire. “Tomi, do it. Do it so hard in me… God, you feel so good, you feel so fucking good in me.”

The words send Tom over the edge, and he comes, almost falling backward but he holds onto Bill and gives him every last bit of his release. Bill gasps and squirms as Tom jerks against him. “Oh, Christ,” Tom manages, gripping Bill so hard his knuckles are almost white. “Oh shit, Bill…”

Bill turns his head and kisses Tom’s cheek, and then licks at his tongue ring. Their wet lips smack at each other and their tongues twine as they fall horizontal, lying on the bed. Bill squirms in his silky hold and loops his arms around Tom’s neck, pulling him on top of his body.

“God, that was even better than before,” Bill sighs out, wiggling under Tom. “Mmm.”

Tom is winded from his orgasm and he lies heavily on Bill, trying to catch his breath. He can feel Bill’s come, all over the front of his skirt. It makes Tom shake a little, makes him face the fact that he just fucked Bill, that he just fucked his brother.

Not some little groupie with a tight ass.

He holds Bill to him and kisses his neck. “We should do it again.”

Bill laughs, holds his wrists out. “Untie me and I’ll think about it.”

“I don’t know about that,” Tom says. “I could just do it again and you wouldn’t be able to stop me.”

Bill laughs again, snuggles closer. “You can keep me tied up if you like.”

“Oh yeah? For how long?”

“Mmm,” is Bill’s only response. He’s slumped against Tom, his eyes fluttering closed. “Tomi?”

Tom’s nodding off, he’s fucking exhausted and so very content. “What.”

“Untie me, I need to be untied.”

Tom rolls over and takes Bill’s soft hands in his. He tugs at the soft silk and pulls it from Bill’s wrists, and massages the skin there. Bill’s eyes flash, heavy lidded, and he smiles as he curls up next to Tom.

“Not going to kick me out?”

“Nah,” Tom replies, rolling onto his side as Bill presses against his back, wrapping his arms around his waist. “You’re not worth it.”

Bill yawns, letting out a breathy laugh against Tom’s back. “I think maybe you think I’m too worth it.”

Tom shrugs, lets sleep wash over him. He’s out cold before he has an answer.

We got some lovely fanart from rainbowcolored7! Thank you so much, it is perfect!

Knock, Knock (1/3)

Tue, 11 Dec 2007 09:40:01 GMT

Title: Knock, Knock (1/3)
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: All it takes is a knock, and he's as good as laid.

Bill bursts in through the door, looking fussed. Tom’s piled on the bed, he’s trying to get the television to work. He looks up when his brother comes in.

“This place,” Bill announces, “is so disgusting.”

Tom shrugs; what else can he do? “Seems okay to me.”

“No, no,” Bill says. “Tom… My room is…”

“What?” Tom turns his attention back to the scrambled television.

“It’s the worst hotel I’ve ever stayed in.” Bill puts his hands on his hips, making a face. “Fuck, I’m afraid to touch anything.”

Tom glances up. Bill certainly looks distraught. The wind is howling outside and the rain is beating down hard on the rattling windows. “Yeah, it’s kinda cheap.”

“Cheap?” Bill replies. “Cheap? We’ve stayed in cheap before. This is… condemned.”

“Bill,” Tom groans. He’s not in the mood for this. He’s not in the mood for anything.

Bill scowls, walks right up to the bed and kicks it. "We're supposed to be in Spain tonight. Right now."

"I know," Tom says. "But what can we do, look at that weather." He gestures to the window and thunder booms as if on cue.

"Fuck the weather," Bill says.

Tom just sighs and leans back on the bed, dropping the remote. It's a lost cause, none of the channels are coming in. It's going to be a long night, especially if Bill keeps whining like this. The whole band is supposed to be in Madrid tonight. Georg and Gustav flew in earlier with David, and are already settled into the small bungalow they had rented. But Bill and Tom had stayed behind to film a short interview and do some photoshoots. Their flight had been scheduled to leave around noon, but the weather had gotten bad and before they knew it, all flights out of Berlin were cancelled.

Without David by their side, the boys were at a loss of what to do, and had ended up, with Saki in tow, in one of the few remaining hotels in the city. All of the other passengers had been quicker, smarter, and had booked up all of the nicer hotels in the area.

Now it’s almost eight at night and the weather is only worsening.

Bill flops onto the bed next to Tom. "We could be on the beach right now, a nice night swim."

"Or at a club," Tom says wistfully. "We were going to go to 'Ghost' tonight."

Bill rolls to his stomach, whines, and says, "I don't even care about the clubs, I'm just fucking bored."

Tom laughs. "And I'm horny. Girls, Bill, there would have been girls at that club. Not that you'd care."

Bill actually laughs and slugs Tom in the arm. There's no harm meant by either of them. Bill's never admitted to being gay, but he doesn't sleep with girls. It's a very well known secret in the industry that he has, on multiple occasions, slept with some guys. Bill insists he likes girls, he likes them so much that he doesn’t want to touch one until he’s sure that she’s The One. He has no problem having relations with men until that day comes, though.

Tom’s never believed Bill, but no one argues. Bill does what Bill wants.

“Well, whatever,” Bill mumbles. “Besides, you’re always getting laid, you can wait a night or two, Tom.”

“Don’t you ever just want to… fuck a girl?” Tom asks.

Bill groans into the pillow. “Yes, we’ve been through this. But I want to--”

“Wait until you find The One,” Tom says. “Yadda, yadda, yadda. I know the whole song and dance.”

“Oh, fuck you,” Bill says. He tries to elbow Tom in the arm, but Tom is too quick, he rolls onto Bill and squeezes his neck hard. Bill squeals, tries to move to his back or shake Tom off him, but he can’t. Tom has a hold on him, and is tickling him behind his ears.

“Admit it,” Tom says, his voice teasing. “You’re so bent out of shape about our flight being delayed because you wanted a piece.”

“Tom!” Bill squeaks, finally forcing Tom off him. They’re both panting and red faced.

“A piece of Georg,” Tom says. He laughs and Bill makes a face.

“That was one time!” Bill shoves Tom hard, grunts, and shoves him again. “You’re never going to let me forget that, are you?”

“You miss him,” Tom teases, widening his eyes. “You want to feel his man hands all over your…”

Bill blanches. “Oh, god.”

“Yeah, I know,” Tom says. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, how did we end up here?”

“I don’t know,” Bill replies, smoothing his hair down. “Man hands.”

“I was kidding.”

Bill raises an eyebrow. “Maybe I wasn’t.”

“Huh?”

Bill bursts out laughing and stands, brushing off his pants. “This place is so fucking gross, I’m gonna sleep standing up.”

Tom watches Bill picking at his hair, his nails, catching a glance at his makeup in the dirty mirror. He can’t imagine Bill plowing a girl, he just can’t. “Bill…”

“Tom, we’re calling Saki, we’re getting a new hotel. We’re using our real names, they’ll have to listen to that,” Bill groans.

“We are not, I’m tired,” Tom says. “Stop being such a girl.”

“Thought you wanted to be with a girl tonight,” Bill snaps, not unkindly. “Oh, god, Tomi. This is bad. You know, there was shit in my room.”

“Shit?” Tom makes a face. “Like… actual shit?”

“No,” Bill says theatrically. “Like… some lady left her entire hooker wardrobe in there.”

Tom barks out a laugh. “Hooker wardrobe?”

“Yeah, the type of girl I’m sure you’d like,” Bill says, eyes going sly on Tom. “A whole bag of skimpy little underwear, like… I don’t even know if what’s in there qualifies as underwear.”

“Oh fuck, tell me more,” Tom says, leaning up on an elbow.

“You’re scary desperate,” Bill says. They both laugh. “And some of the outfits, fuck. I didn’t even want to move the bag, it felt so unsanitary.”

“What sort of outfits?”

Bill rolls his eyes. “Give me a drink and maybe I’ll tell you more.”

Tom shifts to his side and opens the tiny little mini bar. When he comes back up, he’s holding two beers. “Here you go.”

“Beer?” Bill scoffs. “Beer?!”

“That’s all they have,” Tom says. “Take it or leave it.”

“Boah.” Bill takes the beer and twists it open. One sip and he’s already smiling. “Tastes like shit. Now, under my bed is a pair of thigh high latex stockings.”

“Oh fuck.” Tom grabs at his crotch. “And?”

“I’m gonna need more to drink to get into what I found in the dresser.”

Tom pulls out two more beers and they settle in.

**

“Oh fuck, it’s been months,” Bill groans, boneless and half drunk at the foot of the bed. Tom’s leaning against the headboard, laughing at Bill. “Three months… no, four.”

“Who was it?” Tom asks. “Fuck, wait… Was it when Andreas was over?” Bill giggles and Tom nudges him with his foot. “You’re fucking Andreas again?”

“No!” Bill sounds offended. “Andreas is fucking me again.”

Tom grimaces. “You’re fuckin’ in love with him.”

“No,” Bill says again, clutching a beer. “No, no. I thought maybe…”

“You are.”

“I’m not,” Bill says, “gay.”

“Right, right,” Tom mumbles. He tosses back the last of his beer and reaches over for another. “You’re just in love with Andreas.”

“There was this bra with no cups,” Bill says tantalizingly. “And some… crotchless panties. Oh, and these sick little costumes.”

Tom blinks, confused, and then realizes. “Oh! Fuck, yeah?”

Bill nods. “These awful plastic shoes…”

“There are panties in there?”

“You’re a pig.” Bill leans his head back, letting it hang off the mattress. “I wasn’t really in love with him.”

Tom holds up his hands. “Hey, I just want to hear more about the slutty clothes. I haven’t quite pictured the girl wearing them yet.”

Bill frowns. “Nipple suction cups, or something.”

“Shit.”

“He’s a good fuck, though,” Bill mumbles. “Andreas, you know.”

“Bill…”

Bill rolls onto his belly, taking a long sip of his drink. “The room smells like sex, you should just go in there.”

“I don’t want to smell someone else’s sex,” Tom says. “You know, if we were at a nicer hotel, there’d be groupies lined up around the fucking block and then I wouldn’t be getting turned on by my brother describing some faceless girl’s panties. They just knock on my door, Bill. They just show up. A few knocks and that’s it… I‘m as good as laid.”

Bill’s laughing harder than before, so hard that he rolls off the bed with a shriek. “Fuck!” Tom doesn’t move, just watches Bill crawl around on the floor trying, unsuccessfully, to climb back up on the bed. “Toooom! Help me!”

“I’m not Andreas, I can’t help you,” Tom says, chuckling.

“I spilled my beer everywhere!” Bill’s head pops up over the mattress. “Tom!”

“Or Georg,” Tom adds.

“Tom!”

“Bill!”

Bill stands, his shirt soaked with beer. “Some help you are!” Bill tugs at his wet shirt and Tom sniggers. “And it was only one time!”

“One really loud time,” Tom says. Bill flips him off and walks toward the door. “Hey! Don’t go, I’m bored and you can’t just--”

“I’m going to change my shirt, so get your laughing in while you still can, because I don’t want to hear Georg’s name for the rest of the night,” Bill says. “Do you hear me?”

“I really didn’t want to hear Georg’s name that night, either,” Tom groans.

Bill flips Tom off again, two hands this time, and stumbles backward clumsily, holding onto the wall. “God, I’ll be right back.”

Tom laughs, holding his sides, as Bill slides out of the room. He looks around; the room is a shithole, but it’s starting to look a lot better. Tom closes his eyes and takes a slow, deep breath. He’s horny as fuck, that’s for sure. He keeps thinking about what’s waiting for him in Spain, what he might have gotten up to tonight. It’s still early. He grabs his phone and dials Georg.

“Hello?” Georg yells through the phone. Tom can hear a wild party at the other end, and he groans.

“Hey,” Tom replies, trying to sound casual. “What’s going on?”

“I’m… I’m…” Tom hears a couple of girls’ high pitched giggles, and some shouts. “Oh, fuck, Tom.”

“Yeah?”

“You don’t even know,” Georg says. “These Spanish girls.”

“Don’t even tell me.”

“You should be here!”

“I knooooow.” Tom takes a long sip of his drink. “Save some for me.”

“I don’t know, man,” Georg says loudly. “I’m..”

“Fuck,” Tom spits out.

“Get over it. You’re giving me a head start. Gotta go, fucking Tom, this is…” Georg’s voice gets further and further away.

“No!” Tom feels pathetic.

“Hang on, Gustav has a few things to say but he’s got this brunette…”

“Even Gustav?” Tom’s whole spirit is crushed. “Jesus Christ.”

“Tom-”

Tom takes the phone away from his ear. There’s a gentle knocking on the door.

“What?” Tom says into the phone.

“There’s even… There’s even some guys for Bill here!” Georg laughs shrilly, Tom takes the phone away from his ear again.

The knocks on the door continue.

“Fuck,” Tom says. He closes his phone, he’s not in the mood to say goodbye to Georg. He drops his phone and gets up, feeling his head slosh warmly. He regains his balance and walks to the door. “What the fuck?”

He hears a few more knocks and looks through the spy hole. Just as he suspects, it’s Bill, because who else knows he’s there? He groans, and is about to open the door when he notices something. Bill, through the spy hole, seems to be wearing a lot more makeup and his hair is fixed. “Typical,” Tom mutters, opening the door.

He does a double take and slams the door in Bill’s face, almost having a heart attack as he leans against the closed door.

There’s another knock and Tom winces. “Bill! Get out of the hall!” There’s no answer, just another knock. “Bill! Someone will see!”

Just another damn knock.

Tom pulls the door open and gapes at Bill full on. “Bill…”

“How did you know my name?” Bill asks, grinning.

“Um…”

“I can’t believe it’s really you,” Bill says, batting his eyes. Bill’s wearing a tight red shirt, the sort that’s rising up his stomach, exposing his hip bones. And just below those hipbones…

Tom grabs Bill by the collar of his shirt and tugs him inside and closes the door, locking it. “What the fuck?”

Bill puts a hand on his hip, his fingers just touching the low slung waistband of a plaid, pleated skirt. It’s got a slutty Catholic schoolgirl look to it, and Tom gapes even more obviously. Bill’s legs are bare, naked all the way up to the tops of his thighs.

“Did you swipe some of that hooker’s clothes?”

Bill laughs. “I don’t know what you mean.” He crosses his ankles and smiles at Tom. “I can’t believe it’s really you! Tokio Hotel is my favorite band!”

“Bill, what are you saying?”

“Tom?” Bill gives him the wide, innocent eyes. “Tom Kaulitz?” Bill lets out a high pitched giggle. “Oh god.”

“Bill, you’re fuckin’… you’re…” Tom is dumbfounded. “What are you…?”

Bill bats his lashes again, wilting like a flower. Tom looks him over. Aside from the tight shirt and… skirt… Bill’s makeup is unlike Tom has ever seen it before. It’s very feminine, and Bill’s hair has soft curls falling over his shoulders.

“I’m so drunk,” Tom says dumbly.

Bill giggles again, putting a hand to his mouth. “Can I come in? I promise I won’t stay long. I’m like, your biggest fan.”

“You‘re already in the room,” Tom hisses. “You look fucking ridiculous.”

Bill yelps gleefully as Tom pulls him further into the room. As soon as they get near the bed, Tom lets go of Bill and takes a few steps backward. Bill is preening, puckering his lips, posing with his hands on his exposed hips.

“Can I sit?” Bill grins and leans against the dresser demurely. “Sorry, I am so nervous, I’ve never done this before.”

“Bill?” Tom’s got his hands on his head, he’s staring at Bill so hard that his eyes start to strain. “Is this a joke?”

Bill sways a little. “I think you’re so good on the guitar, you’re my favorite in the band.”

“Ugh.” Tom sits down on the bed, he’s in no mood for this. “Bill, cut it out.”

“I heard that if I just knocked on your door…” Bill advances a little on Tom, holding his hands together. “So I did, and now here I am.” He lets out a breathy laugh.

“You’re tanked. You’re gone.”

Bill pouts. “You want me to leave? But I’m so… ready for it…”

Tom makes a face. “Get out of here.”

“So handsome in person,” Bill says in a singsong voice.

“Ugh.”

“Come on,” Bill says, stepping closer. “I thought you were the playboy of the group? I own every magazine with your face on the cover.”

“I bet you do,” Tom says, sighing. He looks up at Bill and can’t help but smile just a little. He decides it is sort of funny, Bill in that ridiculous skirt, pretending to be some love struck groupie.

“I know everything about you!” Bill exclaims. “Everything.”

“Did you know I have an insane younger brother named Bill?” Tom asks.

Bill smiles in a dumb way and flips his hair. “He’s a dreamboat, but you’re more my type.” Bill’s hands twitch at the hem of his short skirt.

“Yeah?” Tom laughs and shakes his head. “So, you just came to my door and…”

“Yeah.” Bill steps even closer, right up to Tom’s widespread knees. “Do you like my skirt?”

“It’s very… revealing,” Tom says. “Just how I like.” He raises an eyebrow, calling Bill’s bluff and Bill just erupts into giggles. If Bill wants to play, Tom’s on the defense. He decides right and there that he’s going to win.

“You should see what’s under the skirt.”

Tom leans forward, presses a hand just behind Bill’s knee. Bill flinches and Tom enjoys the stunned look on his brother’s face. He knows that Bill must have swiped the skirt from the woman who’d had the room before him. But he knows there’s no way Bill’s put on a pair of the woman’s panties.

Tom’s ready to end this little game and get back to drinking. He smoothes his hand up the back of Bill’s leg, planning on grabbing hold of Bill’s boxers underneath the skirt and pantsing him. That ought to shock the smug bastard.

His hand moves up further and further, touching soft, hairless skin, and Bill gasps, trying to step back, but Tom won’t let him.

“Don’t be a tease,” Tom rasps. His hand reaches up, expecting to touch cotton, but only touching firm, bare flesh. Bill’s ass. He’s not wearing anything under the skirt, and he’s so buzzed out from the beer, so horny and on edge, that his hands automatically grab hold of Bill’s ass and squeeze.

“Tom!” Bill jumps back, away from Tom, a scandalized look on his face. “Tom, what the fuck??”

Tom just stares, open mouthed. “Um.”

Bill wrinkles his nose. “Game over, I’m going to take this thing off.”

Without thinking, Tom grabs Bill’s hand and tugs him forward. “No, stay awhile,” he says, his eyes flashing. “You did knock.”

“Tom, shut up,” Bill mutters, pulling away.

“Where are you going?” Tom puts a hand behind Bill’s thigh again and strokes. “You know this school girl thing drives me crazy.”

They just stare at each other for a few moments. Tom’s drunk, he’s trashed, he’s so horny his pants are going to burst. He squeezes Bill’s wrist and Bill takes a hesitant step forward.

“I got all dressed up for you,” Bill says softly. “Because…”

Tom nods. He doesn’t care that it’s Bill. Somehow that doesn’t matter anymore. What he’d felt under that skirt was soft, warm skin. He wants to feel it again. The single touch had turned Tom on to the idea. “I really like it,” Tom replies.

Bill twirls some hair in his fingers and takes another step forward. “Tom…”

“Come here.”

“Tom, no,” Bill says, shaking his head and pulling free from Tom’s hold. “This is so stupid, it was just a stupid joke. Stop making me feel dumb.”

“Why would I make you feel dumb? I’ve never seen you before,” Tom says, as articulately as possible. “You’re a cock tease.”

Bill’s eyes widen. “Tom!”

“Come on, baby,” Tom says, coaxing Bill toward him. “You come all the way up here and now you’re just gonna leave?”

Bill frowns, takes a few steps back.

“What’s the problem?” Tom smiles, feeling warm and heavy. He grabs his beer and takes another sip, finishing it. “Want a drink?”

Bill nods and Tom holds up a full bottle, offering it to Bill. Bill grabs the bottle and takes a very lady-like sip. “I should go, my Mom’ll be worried,” Bill says. “Really. I--”

Tom laughs, feeling the alcohol course through him. He wraps an arm around Bill’s waist. “Why aren’t you wearing any panties, then? If you didn’t come up here to…”

“Tom, I came up here to… Fuck. I was just joking around and…”

“I don’t think it’s funny,” Tom says darkly. “At all.” His hands slide down Bill’s back, just to the waistband of Bill’s skirt. “And I know you’re horny.” He doesn’t know what’s going on in his mind, but he can’t help himself. He lifts Bill’s skirt up in the back and grabs at his brother’s ass. Bill makes a noise, Tom pretends it’s a positive one.

“How do you know I’m horny?” Bill asks. He trembles a little, but makes no move to get away. Tom’s hand holds tighter and Bill moans; yes, definitely a positive noise. “You don’t even know me.”

Ah ha, Bill’s playing again. Tom brushes his knuckles down the crease of Bill’s ass.

“I can just tell,” Tom says. “I can always tell.”

Bill leans into the touch. “Can you? Just how many girls have you slept with, Tom?”

“I need to add one more to my count,” Tom says seriously. “Come sit down,” he adds, patting his lap.

“Shouldn’t we talk first?”

“We’ll talk during.”

Bill raises his eyebrows and stumbles a bit, grabbing onto Tom’s shoulder for support. “You’re really forward. Are you always like this?”

“Hey.” Tom shrugs. “You came up to my room.”

Bill smiles, massages Tom’s shoulder with his long fingers. “True.”

Tom’s hands hold onto Bill’s thighs, stroke the sensitive flesh, and he’s suddenly unclear as to how they’ve gotten into this situation. But Bill’s skin is hot and soft, and Tom’s groin is aching. He leans back, lets go of Bill and just stares.

“Turn around,” Tom drawls.

Bill sticks out his lower lip. “What?”

“I want to see the back of the skirt, see if it’s as nice as the front.”

Bill hesitates and Tom’s worried he’s going to stop their game and leave. Maybe he’s been too forward.

But then Bill slowly turns and Tom can’t help but groan at the display. The skirt is short, too fuckin’ short, or maybe, just short enough. Tom can see the very tops of Bill’s thighs and just the slight swell of Bill’s ass. Bill’s body is amazing, Tom’s known that for awhile now, but there’s something going on inside him tonight that makes him finally break through and want that amazing body for his own.

Bill’s always been sexual, but now it’s directed at him and Tom just wants to hold their bodies together. Bill’s all straight lines and sharp angles, no curves in sight. “Show,” Tom murmurs, his eyes burning a hole through the back of the plaid skirt.

“Excuse me?” Bill looks over his shoulder, a light smirk playing on his lips.

“I wanna see your ass,” Tom says bluntly.

Bill lets out a low breath and turns his head around again. Tom’s guessing that he can’t quite look at him as he slowly lifts the back of the skirt and exposes his perfect, rounded ass.

“Oh, shit,” Tom mumbles, leaning forward and grabbing Bill’s upper thigh again. “Oh, shit.” He rubs his thumbs on either side of Bill’s ass and spreads enticingly, almost keeling over. Bill’s skin feels so good. He gives Bill’s ass a firm squeeze and Bill jumps a little, putting the skirt back down. He turns around and Tom can see a tint of pink in Bill’s cheeks.

“So, what do you want to do?” Bill asks, hands on his hips again. “I can’t be out too late, it’s a school night.”

Tom just pats his knees, gaping. “Sit down.”

Bill lips curl into a smile and slowly lowers himself down on Tom’s lap, straddling his legs on either side. “So?”

Tom lets his hands roam up and down Bill’s back. “Are you gonna get in trouble for being out so late, little girl?”

Bill makes a face and Tom smoothes his hands down to Bill’s ass again. “Yeah, and I’m going to tell on you,” Bill says, looking away. Tom’s fingers curl up under the fabric of the skirt and he lays his hands, palm down, against Bill’s bottom. The skin is so hot there. It almost reminds him of when he’d slip a hand between a girl’s thighs and press his fingers up against her heat.

He shudders at the thought and stares up at Bill. “I want to see your tits,” he says. Bill laughs but Tom is serious. “Show me.”

“But I--”

Tom’s hands slide around to Bill’s belly, pushing the tight t-shirt up a few inches. “Show me.”

Bill shakes his head and bats Tom’s hands away. “I don’t have, I mean… there isn’t much to see.”

Tom isn’t going to give up, he loves the way Bill’s cheeks and neck are turning red. “C’mon, show me.”

Bill sighs a little and scoots back, not entirely off Tom’s lap, but so that Tom has to hang onto Bill so he doesn’t tumble back onto the floor. “I don’t just show these to anyone,” he says.

“But I’m your favorite,” Tom reminds him. “Aren’t I? Or do you have a thing for Georg, maybe?”

Bill shoves Tom in the shoulder, a dark looks in his eyes. “No.” He grabs at his shirt and tugs it up, exposing his entire belly. Tom stares at the star tattoo, watches Bill’s stomach move in and out as he squirms.

“More,” Tom demands.

Bill raises his shirt, his delicate ribs coming into view. Tom’s hands follow, holding Bill’s sides. “You want to see them?”

“I bet you have nice tits.”

Bill lets out a sharp laugh and pulls the shirt all the way up and over his head, his little nipples, hard and pink, exposed to Tom’s hungry stare. Bill shuts his eyes and ducks his head, suddenly he’s shy again. Tom grins and places his hands on Bill’s chest, covering the nipples and pressing his fingers into the skin.

“Yeah, you have nice tits.”

Bill opens his eyes and narrows them at Tom. “You say that to all the girls.”

“Yeah, I do.” Tom grins again and squeezes Bill’s chest, just barely getting a tiny handful. Bill squeals and rocks back, holding his hair in his hands. He pushes into Tom’s hold, Tom’s hands are cool on Bill’s hot skin. Tom leans forward and smells Bill, inhales his scent. “Mm, you smell…”

“Good?”

“Like girls should smell.” Tom eyes Bill firmly and tugs him close, their chests are touching now. “Best tits I’ve seen, by the way.”

“You say that to all the girls,” Bill breathes.

Tom shakes his head. “Still gonna tell your Mom on me?”

“Maybe.” Bill presses his hands flat against Tom’s back and Tom hisses, Bill’s fingernails are sharp and long. “Maybe you should give me a good reason to.”

Tom feels heat pooling in his belly, he’s playing this game and loving it. He’s aching to go further, to see how much further Bill will go. Bill’s squeezing his thighs around Tom’s waist, he’s rocking pleasantly in Tom’s lap, they both know how hard Tom is.

Their faces are close, their chins are almost bumping. What could have been a boring night has now turned into something hot. Tom tips Bill’s chin up, their eyes focused on each other. With each movement, Bill comes a little closer.

Tom bridges the gap between them and kisses Bill fully on the lips.

The kiss could deepen so easily, could turn hot and wet, but both boys stiffen at the contact. They’re kissing, and somehow it’s so much more intimate and inappropriate than anything they’ve done so far.

Bill jerks off Tom’s lap, falls to his side on the bed, and Tom puts some space between them, wiping at his lips.

“Um…” Tom manages to get out. “Bill?”

Bill frowns and touches his mouth, eyes wide. Their game isn’t a game anymore. Tom isn’t sure what to do, he tenses and looks at the floor. They’ve gone too far, they aren’t nearly drunk enough. Tom will remember this all in the morning and…

“Sorry, I just… I heard you didn’t do that,” Bill says.

Tom looks up. Bill’s looking at him with doe eyes, he’s batting his lashes. He’s in character again. Tom sits up and grins hesitantly, sliding his hand over the mattress, his knuckles bumping Bill’s thigh.

“I do,” Tom says. “Only when I want to.”

Bill’s eyes flash and he rolls over, straddles Tom’s lap again. They stare at each other for a few moments and then Tom reaches to grab his beer. He holds the bottle to Bill’s lips and Bill takes a long sip, some of the cool liquid dribbling down his chin. Tom leans forward and laps at the beer, and Bill makes a gasping sound and puts a hand on Tom’s cheek. Tom feels electric, he’s so hard he aches. He smoothes a hand down Bill’s side and rests it on his hip, squeezing.

What is he doing? Bill moans, and he doesn’t care what he’s doing.

“What do you want to do?” Bill asks. Bill moves in his lap and Tom knows that his brother can feel his cock. It’s digging into Bill’s ass.

Tom thrusts up experimentally and Bill tenses and then grinds back down.

“You’re not wearing any panties,” Tom sighs out. “What do you think I want to do?”

Bill looks stunned for just a second. “Really?”

“Really.” Tom thrusts up again, grabs Bill’s waist and pulls him forward. Their lips connect and Bill pushes his tongue between Tom’s lips, licking the roof of his mouth. Tom breathes in and sucks on Bill’s tongue, he’s not thinking about what he’s doing.

Bill leans back and grinds against Tom’s cock again, squeezing his thighs and moving with Tom. Tom slides his hands under the skirt and spreads Bill’s ass, thumbing between the crease, pressing down and massaging. Bill moans loudly, and Tom looks up. It shocks him, and he likes it. He wants to make Bill moan again.

Tom bites down on Bill’s shoulder and Bill makes a pretty noise again. Tom salivates hungrily and pulls back. “Are you wet?”

“Hm? Oh…”

“Am I making you wet?” Tom grins.

Bill shakes his head. “I’m hard…”

Tom kisses Bill, stopping him from talking. “No panties and you’re wet.”

“Fuck,” Bill breathes, opening his eyes. “I am.”

Tom’s thumb pushes against Bill’s entrance, he can feel the heat just inside. “How did you know where I was?” he asks. He pushes inside, just the tip and Bill’s eyes roll back.

“I know everything about you,” Bill says very seriously. “I bet you have a nice cock.”

Tom wants to laugh but he can only moan. “I’ve been told it’s very nice.”

“Hm.” Bill’s hands run down Tom’s chest until he reaches Tom’s belt buckle. “There’s only one way to find out.”

Tom’s mouth falls open as Bill tugs at the belt, opens it and messes with the zip of his pants. Bill is being so forward, he seems to know exactly what he’s going after. So many girls that Tom has been with before, Tom knew that they were doing a lot of guesswork. Bill, however. Tom knows that Bill’s done this.

Bill manages to undo Tom’s pants and slides them down, just enough so that the hard bulge comes into view. Tom groans; his jeans had been heavy on his arousal, but now there is only the thin material of his boxers between his cock and Bill’s hot breath.

“I’m good at this,” Bill murmurs, looking up from under black, fringy hair.

“You’re good at this?” Tom licks his lips. “Or is Bill good at this?”

“I’m so good at this,” Bill goes on, brushing his fingers over Tom’s boxers. “I’ve been told.”

“Guess I’m going to find out,” Tom replies. He can hardly contain himself, he’d gotten so worked up over everything so far; the playing, the flirting, the pretending, the kissing. He’s starting to sober up and he worries for a moment. “Hand me my drink.”

Bill shakes his head. “Show me your dick.”

Tom’s eyes widen. Bill’s either drunker than him, or… “Go ahead,” Tom chokes out.

Bill smiles sweetly and slides his fingers just under the waist of Tom’s boxers, and pulls slowly down. Tom tries to manage his breathing, his balls feel so tight, his cock is aching to be touched. Bill tugs the shorts down past Tom’s erection and stares, still smiling.

“Wow,” Bill says. “It’s…” He licks his lips. “It looks good.”

Tom flushes, watches his brother take his cock in his soft hands and stroke gently. “Fuck.”

“Just wait,” Bill rasps. “I haven’t even gotten my mouth on it yet.”

Tom’s sure he hasn’t ever heard something that sexy before. And it’s coming from his brother’s mouth, which makes it somehow even sexier. “Bill, are you gonna…”

“Of course I am,” Bill says . He smiles at Tom and slinks to his knees on the floor, his head between Tom’s widespread legs. He strokes up Tom’s thighs and then slowly licks up the side of Tom’s dick. It’s a light touch but Tom is transfixed by it. Bill nuzzles his cheek against it, and then presses soft, sucking kisses up to the top of Tom’s erection. “Take off your shirt,” Bill says, pulling back a bit.

“Huh?”

“It’s gonna get in the way, I need room,” Bill says. “Do it or I won’t suck it.”

“I could kick you out,” Tom says, smirking.

“Then I really won’t suck it,” Bill replies, eyes wide.

Tom shakes his head and takes his shirt off; he’s not going to argue. He’s just caught sight of Bill’s tongue ring and really wants to feel it against his dick. He throws his shirt on the floor and looks back down. He sees Bill staring at his cock, stroking it curiously. Bill has a plan, Tom can tell.

“I’ve thought about this for so long,” Bill says softly.

Tom raises his eyebrows, wondering if Bill is still pretending. It doesn’t matter - his cock twitches at Bill’s words. Bill presses a kiss to the head of Tom’s cock and then takes it in his mouth, sucking in powerfully. Tom gasps and leans back, cringing. It’s so good, so good that he can barely take it. Bill is swirling his tongue around the tip in ways that Tom has never felt. Yes, Bill knows exactly what he’s doing.

Tom puts a hand on the back of Bill’s head and forces it closer. Bill shows some resistance, he pulls back and glances up, his mouth full of Tom. “Uh uh,” he mumbles, and the vibrations of Bill’s voice make Tom shiver.

“Come on, girl,” Tom says easily. “How bad do you want it?”

Bill pulls back, completely releasing Tom’s cock from his lips. “How bad do you want it?”

Tom narrows his eyes and forces Bill’s head forward again. Bill let outs a giggle and Tom can’t see his cock anymore, because Bill’s all over it, licking and kissing. Tom bites his tongue and feels Bill’s hands cradle around the base of his cock. Bill squeezes, digs his fingernails in gently. Tom hisses sharply. “Careful,” he warns, not quite meaning it. Of course Bill can do what he wants.

“Mmm,” Bill hums, taking Tom’s whole cock in his mouth. Tom pushes Bill’s head forward, grabbing a fistful of hair and groaning. Bill’s head is bobbing back and forth, up and down in Tom’s lap. Bill’s hands are working around Tom’s cock, his thumbs are flicking at Tom’s balls. There’s so much going on down there that Tom nearly shouts.

“Fuck,” Tom moans. “Fuck.”

Bill sucks in, wet, hungry sounds coming from his lips. “Nngh so fuh ee,” he mumbles around Tom’s dick.

“What?” Tom’s on cloud nine. He looks down and Bill’s looking up at him again with near black eyes.

“Want you to fuck me,” Bill repeats darkly.

“Oh, Jesus,” Tom groans loudly. “Keep… doing that. Fuck, keep doing that.”

“Mm,” Bill hums again. He laps at the slit, squeezing Tom’s balls. “You taste so good.”

“Yeah?”

“Mm… yeah. Knew you would.”

Tom closes his eyes tight, wondering again if Bill’s still playing. He’s frighteningly sober now, his head only feels vaguely fuzzy. He’ll remember all of this in the morning, and he’s never enjoyed a blowjob more.

And then Bill’s mouth pops off Tom’s dick.

“What?” Tom asks, grabbing at Bill’s head. Bill ducks out of Tom’s grasp and sits back on his lap. Bill sits right on Tom’s cock, and he can feel it brush right up Bill’s crease. He hisses, thrusts up, and Bill whines.

“Put something in me,” Bill says, his eyes desperate and dark. “I fuckin’ need you.”

Tom’s eyes widen and he pulls Bill toward him, their chests collide. “Put what in you?”

“Anything.”

“Ha.” Tom grins and grabs Bill’s hips, drags him back and forth across his lap, and Bill moans. Tom thumbs between the crease of Bill’s ass and feels how warm it is, how delicious Bill’s skin feels. His mouth waters, he wants to get in there. “Your pussy feels hot.”

“My…” Bill lets out a laugh and tosses his head back, grinding into Tom. “Yeah. Yeah, it is. Fuck.”

Tom strokes Bill’s hole, pushes his finger in and takes it out. Bill mewls helplessly, leaning back and digging his nails into Tom. Tom hisses and squeezes Bill’s ass, spreading it and handling Bill roughly. The heat between them is making them both start to sweat, their lips connect in a harsh kiss.

“You’ve got a nice pussy,” Tom whispers, playing with Bill’s hole. His fingers brush behind Bill’s balls and Bill squeaks and falls forward on Tom. “You like when I touch your clit?”

Bill gasps. “Tom-”

Tom shakes his head. “You were begging for it a second ago.”

“Mmm…” Bill throws his head back and moans, Tom has a dry finger in him. “Are you playing with me?” Bill asks, between harsh pants.

Tom’s finger searches deeper, he knows he’s supposed to be looking for something in there. He crooks his finger experimentally and Bill squirms on him. “I’m not playing,” Tom says. “Where…”

Bill leans back and whispers, “To the right. Just…”

Tom moves his finger, loving the way Bill grinds down on it. “Here?”

Bill nods, his jaw clenching, nostrils flaring out a bit. Tom crooks his finger hard and Bill keens, his body going tense and then falling limp against Tom’s chest.

“Don’t… fuck… play with me,” Bill gasps.

“Does it feel like I’m playing with you?” Tom pumps his finger in and out and Bill gasps out a moan on each inward thrust.

“More,” Bill demands. He rises off Tom’s finger and grabs his wrist. “Now.”

“Bossy,” Tom says with a wry smile.

Bill’s eyes narrow. “Don’t be cute,” he says. “I didn’t come here for you to be cute. I came here to get fucked.” Tom’s dick throbs at the words. “And maybe to get something signed for my older brother.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, he has a thing for Bill,” Bill says.

Tom grins and thrusts his finger more insistently in Bill. “Yeah, right.” He twists his finger in deeper, curling it, itching something inside Bill. Bill shouts, surprising both of them. “Oh, yeah?”

“Mm…” Bill arches his back and clenches tight around Tom, and Tom lets out a sharp breath. Bill is so tight, and he’s hot as hell around Tom’s finger. “Tomi…”

“Only my brother calls me that.” Tom looks at Bill darkly and almost lifts him up, he pushes his finger in so deep. Bill locks his legs around Tom’s waist and throws his arms around Tom. He drops his chin on Tom’s shoulder and sighs raggedly.

Bill seems to be itching at his own skin, he wants it so bad. Tom is playing with him, he’s teasing and riling Bill up, it isn’t fair. Bill reaches down and presses a palm flat against Tom’s erection, wrapping his fingers around it and squeezing tight. Tom groans and pulls his finger from Bill’s hole.

“You came here to get fucked?” Tom says lowly, spreading his legs and flushing as Bill handles his cock. “Is that all?”

“Well, I was hoping to find Georg,” Bill whispers, right into Tom’s ear. “I hear he’s hung.”

Tom growls and grabs Bill by the hips, dragging him across his lap. Bill squeaks and shoves Tom backward.

“But you’ll do,” Bill says. He tugs out of Tom’s grasp and stands.

Tom’s lying back on the bed, staring up at Bill’s disheveled form. He’s nearly naked, just wearing that little skirt, his long legs drawing Tom’s eyes up to his tiny hipbones.

“Where are you going?” He wraps his legs around Bill’s thighs. Bill steps back.

“Don’t move,” Bill says. “I want you to be naked by time I get back.”

“But where—”

“Just do it or I won’t let you,” Bill says. He smiles and disappears in the bathroom.

Tom can hear him messing around with something in there, and he wastes no time in kicking his pants and boxers off. This game they’re playing is one of the most confusing things he’s done in a while. He glances down at his dick and strokes it once. He winces; Bill’s got him harder than someone has in a while, too.

He sits on the bed and takes a long, last sip of his beer. His head is far too clear. He tosses the bottle on the floor and lies down, then thinks the better of it and stands up. He’s just about to kneel on the bed when Bill comes back in, holding a small bottle.

“Oh, god,” Bill whimpers, nearly dropping what he’s holding upon seeing Tom. Tom just shrugs but he’s shaking, his knees are wobbly and he kneels on the bed, gesturing to Bill with his finger.

“What do you have?” Tom asks, his voice catching in his throat a little.

“Um…” Bill fumbles for a moment but then holds up the small bottle of lotion. “It helps, you know?”

Tom pats his lap. Bill grins and starts to walk over, messing with the zip on his skirt. Tom clears his throat. “Leave that on,” he says.

“Huh?”

“Leave it.” Tom’s tone is demanding, firm. Bill just lets go of the zip and holds his hands up, surrendering. “Come over here.”

“I’m coming, jeez,” Bill replies, crawling on the bed over to Tom. “Fuck, you guys couldn’t even afford a more decent hotel?”

“It seems like your kind of place,” Tom says, smirking and picking at the little skirt.

Bill blushes and huffs. “You guys are supposed to be rock stars. I could have gone to any bar and picked up any guy and it would have been nicer than this, fuck.”

Tom laughs and pulls Bill forward, shutting him up with a kiss. Bill curls his tongue into Tom’s mouth and trails his hand down to handle Tom’s cock again. Tom groans into Bill’s mouth and opens his eyes, Bill is watching him carefully. Tom thrusts forward, dragging his cock along Bill’s stomach.

Their mouths part and Bill says, very softly, “Do you want me to sit on it, then?”

Tom grunts and decides that’s a marvelous idea. He grabs Bill’s hips and thrusts up against his ass. “Yes.”

Bill grins and uncaps the bottle of lotion. Tom shakes his head and takes it from Bill. “Hey!” Bill sticks his lip out. “Do you even know what you’re doing?”

“Fuck yes.” Tom is almost offended. He squeezes out a large dollop of lotion and wraps his hand around his cock, hissing at the sensation.

Bill pokes Tom in the chest. “No, really, do you? I mean… have you ever done this?”

Tom rolls his eyes. “I thought you knew everything about me, Bill.”

Bill’s eyes flash and he kneels up, over Tom’s cock. “I know you’ve fucked a lot of girls. Everyone fucking knows that. But have you ever fucked someone’s ass?”

“I’m not fucking your ass,” Tom counters. “I’m fucking your cunt.”

Bill huffs and Tom presses a wet finger to his hole. “That’s not my…” His finger sinks in and Bill moans.

“Yeah, it is,” Tom says evenly. “Your hot little cunt.”

“Um.” Bill lets out a low breath and sighs, lowering himself, relaxing his limbs. Tom is really working his hole, almost too roughly. Bill’s moans and sighs are a sign for Tom to keep going, that he likes it, that soon he’ll come, if Tom keeps it up. Suddenly Tom is determined to make Bill have an orgasm.

Tom scissors his fingers inside Bill and stretches, not too gently, and Bill howls. “Fuck,” he whispers, biting down on Tom’s shoulder. “You have to fuck me soon, I’m not gonna last.”

“Yeah?” Tom chews at his lip; he’s not going to last much longer, either. “Can you handle this?” He takes Bill’s hand and squeezes it over his cock, and Bill gives Tom a defiant look.

“I’ve had bigger.” Bill smirks and Tom pinches his waist, and they both laugh. “Okay, okay. I won’t talk about Georg.”

Tom narrows his eyes and chooses to ignore that one. “You won’t be thinking about anything but my dick in a few seconds.”

“We’ll see.”

Tom removes his fingers and lifts Bill over his straining erection. “Now?”

Bill lowers himself and Tom’s cock bumps his entrance. He seems to test the resistance of his body, almost letting Tom inside, almost.

“I think you need to stretch me a bit more,” Bill says, voice teasing. He pushes down hard and the head of Tom’s cock just breaches his body.

“Fuck!” Tom hisses and Bill pulls off.

“You’re too big,” Bill says. “Enormous.” He smiles and sinks down again, letting Tom further inside this time. “Oh…”

Tom grabs Bill’s hips and holds him still. “Shit, Bill. Shit!” Bill is so tight and burning hot inside. Tom’s worried he’s going to come very soon. “Just… don’t…”

Bill squirms in Tom’s lap and slowly sits up on his knees, Tom’s cock slipping from his body again. Bill’s giggling and Tom swears, grabbing Bill’s upper thighs and squeezing. “Cock tease.”

“Nuh uh,” Bill says. He strokes Tom’s dick and rubs it gently against his entrance. “I don’t know if I can take it.”

“You can,” Tom says. “You can.”

Bill winks, actually fucking winks, and takes Tom inside his body. But this time it’s not a tease, he lets Tom sink all the way in.

Tom gasps and leans back, holding Bill’s hips. Bill’s face is contorted, he’s biting his lip and whispering little curses. Tom feels a little proud; Bill said he was big, enormous. Even if it’s bullshit, Tom doesn’t care. He lifts Bill up a bit and Bill freezes, squeezing Tom’s shoulder, “No!”

“No?”

“Yes,” Bill hisses, sliding back down. He wraps his arms around Tom’s shoulders and squeezes his muscles on Tom’s dick. Tom groans and lifts Bill again, pulling himself out slightly. Bill sighs and licks a stripe up Tom’s neck, presses his tongue down against his ear and breathes in. “Oh god, yes.”

Bill’s voice is right in Tom’s ear, it’s a voice that Tom hasn’t really heard before. He assumes it’s Bill’s sex voice, and Tom raises his eyebrows. He never thought he’d hear Bill’s sex voice.

He likes it, and kisses Bill’s cheek. “Want me to fuck you or…?”

“Uhh,” Bill grunts, his limbs weighing down heavily on Tom. “Fuck, it’s been so long, fuck…”

Tom nods, grins, and picks Bill up and turns them around. He lies Bill on his stomach and Bill grips the sheets with his fists and opens up for Tom. Tom thrusts inside, gripping Bill’s waist and flicking the skirt up. Bill’s ass comes into view and Tom’s stomach flips; it’s one of the best he’s seen, perhaps the best. “Nice,” Tom comments, pinching it.

“Oh,” Bill moans in reply, his face pressed into the mattress. He’s unraveling before Tom, shaking and writhing. “Don’t mess around, Tomi…”

Tom isn’t planning on it. He’s getting his wish, he’s getting laid. And so is Bill. How can this be wrong?

He shakes those thoughts away and starts fucking Bill, starts getting lost in the feeling and the little sounds Bill’s making. They’re endearing, sweet, and so fucking hot, too.

Soon the little sounds are not so little anymore. Bill rises to his knees and pushes back into Tom’s thrusts. “Harder,” Bill grunts out and Tom tries to obey.

He pushes into Bill’s body and gasps, it’s so good. “So good, Bill.”

Bill’s legs spread wider and he pushes back harder, nearly knocking Tom over. “Need to come, just make me come.”

“You’ll come,” Tom rasps, steadying Bill by holding around his stomach. Bill flops over and holds himself up with his arms, on all fours. Tom is salivating, it’s so amazingly hot, he almost can’t take it. He thrusts harder, harder, deeper. Bill moans louder than any girl ever has for Tom. They’re fitting together so well, it’s a perfect fuck. Satisfying. Tom’s near coming. “Are you close?” Tom asks breathlessly.

“I… I…” Bill twists around, glancing at Tom. “I need to be touched, my… Oh god, it aches.”

“Shh,” Tom says, rubbing up Bill’s back. “Just relax, let go, you gotta come for me. I wanna see you come.”

“You do?”

Tom nods, fuck, of course he does. He smoothes a hand down under Bill’s belly and strokes the soft skin, his knuckles are being bumped by Bill’s hard cock. Tom raises his eyebrows; so that’s what Bill wants.

“Fuck,” Tom murmurs, squeezing Bill’s middle. Bill cries out and his hand disappears under him, he starts stroking himself furiously. Tom grins, Bill’s face is so concentrated. He’s biting his lip, his eyes are almost shut… Tom knows that look. “Come on, babe. Come on, come…”

Bill hisses and tenses, letting go of himself and making such a pretty, curious noise that Tom stops his thrusting. “Oh, god,” Bill wails, dropping his head down and collapsing to his elbows. Tom feels Bill squeeze around him tightly, almost choking Tom’s cock, and then Bill groans loudly and pants. Tom knows he came.

“That good?” Tom cranes his neck, still holding Bill’s stomach. “Bill?”

“Keep going,” comes Bill’s tiny, spent voice. “Want you to come in me… Fuck, please.”

Tom rears up a bit, kneeling behind Bill and shoving forward, his hands moving from Bill’s stomach to his hips. Their bodies are slick with sweat and Tom can barely hold on. He’s going to come in Bill’s tight little body and just that thought makes his balls tighten.

“Fuck, I’m so wet, do it,” Bill says, his words muffled by the pillow.

Tom pulls completely out and then drives back in, loving the soft whine the movement pulls from Bill. “Do you still like it?” he asks. “Even after you’ve come?”

Bill pushes his hips back. “Hurry up.”

Tom laughs and thrusts in hard twice, watching Bill grab at the bed sheets. “Can’t handle it?”

“I’m bored,” Bill says.

“Oh, fuck you,” Tom says, grinning and smacking Bill hard on the ass. Bill yelps and tightens around Tom to the point where it’s almost painful. It’s just enough because Tom entire body seizes up and he comes with a low growl right inside of Bill.

Bill groans and rolls out from under Tom, swearing and moving up the bed. Tom can see Bill’s cock is still hard, though there’s come on his skirt and belly. “Fuck,” Bill says and tugs his skirt down, covering his erection.

“Fuck, come here,” Tom demands. Bill shakes his head and Tom grabs Bill’s little waist and forces him onto his naked lap. “You really liked that, huh?”

Bill rolls his eyes. “You’re the man,” he says sarcastically.

Tom grins and without warning, presses two fingers into Bill’s body, working them in and out immediately. Bill’s obviously on edge, he rides Tom’s fingers without hesitation, burying his face in Tom’s neck.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Bill moans, and Tom feels Bill’s body tighten around him.

“You’re slutty,” Tom whispers, grinning. “So fucking slutty.”

“No,” Bill moans, proving Tom’s point as he screws down on Tom’s fingers. He reaches under the skirt and grabs his cock, hard, and pulls steadily. Tom keeps fingering him, grunting, nearly lifting Bill with the power of his thrusting. Bill cries out and leans forward, doubling over, clenching Tom’s fingers tight. Tom’s stomach fires up as he chases Bill’s orgasm, needing to make him come again.

“Oh fuck!” Bill shouts, shaking and then going rigid against Tom. Tom laughs triumphantly as Bill comes again, even more powerfully than before. “Fuck, Tom, fuck…”

“You’re easy,” Tom replies, pulling his wet fingers out of Bill and putting one in his mouth. Bill watches with wide eyes. “Mmm.”

“How do I taste?” Bill whispers.

“Like…” Tom takes his fingers out of his mouth and strokes Bill’s hair once. “Like I want more.”

Bill smiles. “You don’t get more, it’s just a one night stand.”

Tom tenses but nods. “That’s the rule.”

“You’re a good fuck,” Bill says, kissing Tom gently and then sliding off the bed, picking up his shirt. “Best I’ve had, maybe.”

“Maybe?”

Bill rolls his eyes and Tom yawns. “Ah, I wore you out.”

“Yeah, you did,” Tom says. He crawls under the scratchy blankets and lays his head down. Instantly his eyelids feel heavy and he yawns again. “Thanks for knocking.”

Bill laughs, watching Tom drift to sleep. He pulls his shirt on and is about to walk out when he stops at the dresser. After checking his hair in the mirror, he takes a piece of the crummy hotel stationary and jots something down and sets it on the table next to Tom’s bed.

Smiling, satisfied, he lets himself out.

**

Tom wakes up and his back his aching, his head is aching, and he’s never felt so fucking satisfied

He stretches out on the stiff mattress and grins.

“Fuck,” he moans, wincing as his back pops. He sits up and his stomach rumbles, he’s starving, and even though he knows the room service is shit, he finds himself reaching over to the phone anyway.

He’s just picking up the receiver when he notices a small slip of paper on the bedside table. Leaning over to read what’s scrawled out on it, he grins.

“Last night was amazing. Call me if you’re ever in town again, stud. –Bill”

He turns the paper over in his hands, chuckling to see Bill’s cell phone number written on the back.

Without thinking, he dials the number. Bill probably won’t pick up this early, but—

“Hello?” Bill sounds only half awake.

Tom grins. “Up for round two?”

Bill laughs. “What took you so long?”

“You wore me out.”

“Alright,” Bill replies. “I’ll be right over?”

“I don’t usually call, you know,” Tom says, smirking.

“You must be in love with me.”

“Um…” Tom makes a face, but smiles. “Let’s just get you over here, okay?”

Tom can hear Bill’s laughter through the wall and they hang up.

TBC…

Don't Tell Mom (8/?)

Sun, 02 Dec 2007 08:09:34 GMT

Title: Don't Tell Mom (8/?)
Previous Chapters: Here
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17 (eventually)
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: What Mom doesn't know won't kill her.

.age 14.

Simone had quite the hangover.

“What a way to start the new year,” she groaned. She took a small sip of her coffee and tried to will her migraine away. Gordon shuffled in, the same sort of painful grimace on his face as Simone.

“Hanging in there?” he asked. He stood behind her and massaged her shoulders with strong hands.

“We’ll see,” she said.

“Where are the boys?”

“Andreas and Bill are passed out in the living room,” Simone said. “I think they got a hold of some rum.”

Gordon just laughed. “They’re good kids.” Simone tensed a little, but didn’t say anything. “Are you alright? You’ve been on edge a lot lately, darling.”

“I’m just… Are you concerned at all for the boys? Do you…” She took a deep breath. “Think they’re too close?”

“Andreas and Bill?” Gordon pulled up a chair. “Simone?”

“No,” she said. Her heart was thudding a little, she wanted to tell him about her suspicions. Why couldn’t she? He loved those boys as if they were his own, surely he would understand. Surely he wouldn’t…

She couldn’t handle it if he was disgusted by them, if he looked at them differently.

“Well,” Simone said. “Yes. Andreas and Bill. Do you think they’re…”

Gordon poured himself some coffee, frowning. “Would it matter if they were? Simone.”

“No! Oh no, no,” she replied. “Of course it wouldn’t. I just… worry for them.”

“Tom’ll look after Bill,” Gordon said, smiling.

“I know he will.” Simone pursed her lips, the statement held different meanings for each of them. “I worry for him, too.”

“Tom’s alright, he can take care of himself,” Gordon said. “And he’d never let anything happen to Bill.”

“Gordon…” Simone set her mug down and stared at her husband. “If I told you…”

“What is it?”

A crash was heard upstairs and Simone sighed. Gordon reached across the table and squeezed her hand. “I’m sorry,” Simone said softly. “I have a lot on my mind.”

“I’m taking you away for a weekend, alright?” Gordon topped off her coffee mug and she smiled. “A small vacation.”

“Who will watch the boys?” Simone said wearily.

“They’re old enough to stay by themselves,” Gordon replied. “We’ll ask the neighbors to keep an eye on them, if they need anything.”

Simone’s migraine got worse. “I don’t think so.”

“Come on, it’ll be fun for them. And us,” Gordon added. “Besides, they’ll be on their own soon enough, you know.”

“I just…” Simone trailed off and sighed. “Fuck, why did we drink so much last night? We’re not thirty anymore.”

“Simone.” Gordon caressed Simone’s hand, squeezed it. “I’m taking you on vacation, don’t argue with me.”

Just then, Bill padded into the kitchen, still in his rumpled clothes from the night before. “Morning,” he muttered, sitting at the table and hunching forward.

“Too much rum for too little a boy?” Gordon asked. Bill just groaned.

“Was that rum?” Bill frowned. “Do we have rum?”

“No, we don’t have rum, Bill,” Gordon replied, smiling. “You drank it all.”

“Georg…” Bill rubbed at his forehead. “I remember little cups.”

“Is Andreas still asleep, sweetheart?” Simone asked. Bill shuffled over to her and kissed her cheek. “Happy New Year’s, honey.”

Bill smiled. “Yeah, he’s asleep. Where’s Tom?”

“I heard a crash upstairs,” Simone said.

“That’s what woke me up.” Bill yawned, scratching his head. “How was the party?”

“Lovely,” Simone said, forcing a smile. She had to forget her suspicions. “We had a lot of fun.”

“I’m taking your old mom on a small vacation,” Gordon told Bill. “Next weekend.”

“Who’s gonna watch us?” Bill asked slowly.

“No one,” Gordon said. “You and your brother will watch over the house.”

“Really??” Bill’s eyes widened. “For like… three days? It’ll be just us?”

“I’m sure I could arrange for your grandparents to come,” Simone said.

“No way, no way,” Bill said, grinning. “Fuck, that’s so cool.”

“Language.”

Gordon patted Bill’s shoulder. “No wild parties.”

Bill rolled his eyes. Simone felt her stomach sink. She didn’t want to leave Tom and Bill by themselves for a whole weekend. It gave her a feeling of dread. She wasn’t concerned about what they would do to the house, but rather… each other. She took a long sip of her coffee and tried to force the thoughts out of her mind.

“You’ll be living in the city soon, anyway,” Gordon was saying, a proud tone in his voice.

“I hope so,” Bill said. “Mom, can I have some toast?”

Simone wasn’t listening, she was lost in her own mind. She couldn’t always watch over them, she knew that. With their record deal, they would be away from her more than not. The thought made her heart ache. What sort of trouble could they get into?

And if they were messing around, and she prayed they weren’t, they could get hurt. If she was afraid her own husband would react badly, how would strangers react if they found out?

“Mom?”

Simone snapped out of it. “Toast? Um, yeah. Sure, sweetie.”

She stood, dread washing over her. She would have to do something, but she didn’t know what or how.

**

“Tonight,” Bill whispered, just as they grabbed their backpacks from their lockers.

Tom groaned, hoisting his bag around his shoulders. “So much fucking homework.”

“Tom,” Bill whined, nudging his brother. “You’re not doing your homework.”

“Will you?” Tom asked Bill seriously.

Bill made a face. “When did Mom and Gordon say they were leaving?”

“Um… After we got home,” Tom replied. They started walking out of the school, a few people snickering at Bill. “Yeah, they wanted to say goodbye to us.”

“They’d better not stay for too long,” Bill said, pouting. “I wanna… do things.”

Tom looked around, they were still surrounded by people. “Um, yeah.”

Bill tugged at Tom’s elbow. “Don’t you wanna do things?”

“Yes.”

Bill made a frustrated sound, pinching Tom’s elbow. Tom cried out and they walked faster, turning down the path home. Bill looped his arm in Tom’s and walked beside him, they were all alone on the road.

“Tonight,” Bill repeated, “I wanna do it.”

Tom nearly choked. “Really?”

“It’ll be good this time.”

“Will it?” Tom took a deep breath, he was getting hard.

“Yup… It’ll be good because I feel really ready,” Bill said. “And we can be loud.”

“You wanna be loud?” Tom managed.

“I always wanna be loud. Tomi,” Bill went on, gripping his arm tightly. “This is the first time we’re gonna be all alone.”

“Oh god, so… you really want to do it?” Tom asked again. “It didn’t really work for you, you know, last time.”

They hadn’t tried since New Years, in fact, they hadn’t even messed around since then. Simone had been watching them very closely, and it made them both nervous.

“I just want to kiss you,” Tom said, flushing. “At least.”

“You can do whatever you want,” Bill said. “You can kiss me and touch me and… you know.”

“Oh geeze.” Tom ducked his head. “I’m already hard. When can we? Right away?”

Bill laughed. “Did that really make you hard?”

“Um…” Tom covered his crotch with a book, and Bill grinned, tugging it away. Tom was definitely hard, his pants bulging a little. “Bill, I feel dumb.”

“Don’t.” Bill tugged on Tom’s arm, stopping them. “That makes me hard. That it makes you hard.” They were both blushing. “Fuck, though, we can’t walk into the house like this.”

“Mom might freak a little. What’s up with her lately? I feel like she knows, but how could she?”

Bill adjusted his backpack. “She came in, you know, right after. Maybe she’s on her period.”

Tom made a face. “Okay, there goes my hard on, thanks.”

“Period,” Bill said again, bumping into Tom.

“Shut up,” Tom groaned.

Bill slipped his hand into Tom’s and Tom felt awkward immediately. What if someone saw?

Regardless, he squeezed back and they kept walking.

When they got in the house, they kicked off their shoes and dropped their bags on the floor. Gordon was sitting on the couch in the living room, on the phone, making hotel reservations.

“Where’s Mom?” Bill asked. Gordon looked up and pointed toward the kitchen. Bill nodded and Tom sprawled on the couch, turning on the television. Grinning, Bill headed into the kitchen.

Simone looked up from her purse. “Hi, honey. How was school?”

“Fine.” Bill sat down in a chair and grabbed an apple from the middle of the table. “When are you guys leaving?

“Trying to get rid of us?” Simone tried keeping her tone light, but Bill heard the snap in it.

“No…” Bill took a bite of the apple. “Just wondering.”

“I’ve left some dinners for you two. Don’t just order pizza every night.” Simone wrote something down and handed it to Bill. “Here’s the number of the hotel, and our cell phone numbers… Do you think you’ll invite Andreas over? The other guys?”

“Probably not, me and Tom are just going to hang out, sleep a lot,” Bill replied with his mouth full.

“In your bedrooms?”

Bill frowned. “I dunno, maybe we’ll crash in the living room.” Simone nodded distractedly and Bill scowled. “What’s up with you lately?”

Simone’s brow furrowed. “Nothing is up with me. I just… I’m your mother and there has to be rules, otherwise everything will be chaos.”

Bill couldn’t help but laugh. “You never cared before about rules. Well, except when I’d say fuck or shit or something.”

“Language, Bill,” Gordon warned, coming into the living room. “Darling, we better get on the road.”

“Maybe we should leave in the morning,” Simone said slowly.

“No,” Bill and Gordon said at the same time, and Simone widened her eyes.

“Alright,” Simone replied, holding her hands up. “I know when I’m not welcome.” She smiled a little.

Gordon let out a laugh. “They can’t wait to trash the house, I’m sure. Get up to whatever it is they get up to.”

Simone’s smile froze. “Of course. Let’s get going.”

Bill watched, eating his apple, as his parents got ready to go. When they were gathered by the front door with their suitcases, he and Tom wandered in and gave them hugs.

“Be good,” Simone told Tom seriously, giving him a meaningful look. Tom just hugged her and shrugged, mumbling an “okay”. She hugged Bill next. “Honey, you call me if anything happens.”

“Jeez,” Bill said, pulling back. “I’ll be fine. Tom’s here.”

“Yes,” Simone replied, letting go of her son. “Well… you have our numbers.”

“Bye,” the twins chorused. Gordon picked up the luggage and held the door open for Simone, and they were gone.

Bill and Tom stared at each other.

“So,” Bill said. “Wanna do it?”

Tom’s eyes widened. “Bill! You can’t just…”

Bill grinned and turned, heading toward the stairs. “I’ll be upstairs… if you’re interested.”

Tom watched him go, staring dumbly at his brother’s retreating form for a moment before snapping out of it and running up the stairs after him.

Bill squealed in surprise as Tom pinched him in the ass, and squealed, hopping up the last step. “No, Tomi!” he teased, and ran from his brother.

Tom laughed and chased Bill into his room, grabbing him around the waist and tackling him to the floor. “Bill, give in, give in,” Tom said right into his ear. Bill squirmed and squeezed out of Tom’s hold.

“Never!” Bill cried, and rolled over onto Tom. “I got you,” he said.

Tom smiled. “That’s what you think,” he said casually. He relaxed his body and let Bill pin him down, wriggling over his legs. Tom shut his eyes and breathed out. “Or maybe I’m tired.”

“Tom, you are not.”

“It was a long day…”

Bill stared down at Tom, pinching his shoulders and elbows, and Tom cracked a grin. “Tomi,” Bill whined.

“Mm.”

Bill planted a kiss on Tom’s lips and Tom opened his eyes. “The house is ours,” Bill whispered.

“Mom looked so pissed that we were gonna be left alone, I wouldn’t be surprised if she sent a fucking babysitter over.”

“Gordon wouldn’t let her.”

Tom pulled Bill close to him and squeezed, kissing Bill’s neck. “Maybe Grandma.”

“Maybe Grandma what?” Bill said, making a face.

“Maybe that’s who Mom will send over.”

“She’s not sending anyone over,” Bill said, poking Tom in the nose with a long finger. “We’re alone, all weekend, and we can do whatever we want.”

“Mmm,” Tom hummed. “Know what I want?”

Bill grinned, rolling his hips down against Tom. “I think so…”

“I want…” Tom’s eyes slipped shut. “A nap.”

“Tomi!”

Tom pretended to snore and Bill pinched his nose shut, watching him sputter a little. Tom bumped Bill off, both laughing. “If we’re alone,” Tom said, hovering over Bill. “I want to play a little.”

“Play?”

Tom smiled. “Yeah. I want to play with you before we… you know.”

Bill’s stomach fluttered. They’d never been able to play, really play, before. They’d always had to be so careful, they’d always had to be on the watch for someone who might catch them. Their mother was always home.

Bill let out a loud groan, because he could, and he kicked the door open. “We don’t even have to be careful.”

“I know,” Tom said, rocking gently into Bill. “We could do it in every fucking room, if we wanted.”

“Even Mom’s?” Bill asked, eyes wide.

“Okay, maybe not every room,” Tom replied, grimacing. “But, you know, most.”

Bill bit Tom’s earlobe and sucked it in between his lips, and hissed when Tom’s clothed erection dragged across his groin. “Fuck, Tom, fuck.”

“I know what’s on your mind,” Tom said, pressing down so hard against Bill that they both gritted their teeth. “We gotta wait, though.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know… We have the whole weekend,” Tom said, pulling back. “Maybe you’ll get tired of it. Maybe you won‘t be able to take it.”

Bill narrowed his eyes. “Maybe you won’t be able to take it.”

Tom laughed, feeling cocky. “I’m not the one taking it.”

Bill growled and overpowered Tom, pinning him down to the floor again. “Take it back.”

Tom shook his head.

“Fine,” Bill said, rolling off Tom and climbing onto the bed. “I guess I’ll do this alone.”

“What?”

Bill smiled sweetly, lying down on the mattress and unbuttoning his jeans. He slowly slid his hand down his pants and moaned, touching himself. Tom stared, mouth wide open, on the ground.

“You’re just gonna do that?” Tom asked.

“Oh… Mm… Yeah,” Bill replied, closing his eyes. Now he was playing.

“Bill, you can’t just…” Bill obviously could, he groaned louder. “Bill!” Tom crawled to the bed and grabbed Bill’s wrist.

“Are you gonna do it?” Bill asked with wide eyes. He shifted his hips up and Tom felt his erection.

“Yeah,” Tom almost growled out. He suddenly wanted to devour Bill, to swallow him whole. “I am.” Tom leaned down and opened his mouth on Bill’s chin, sucking on the skin. Bill groaned and squirmed under Tom. It made Tom’s cock ache to know he had control of Bill, at least when he had Bill under him.

“Are you going to fuck me?”

“No,” Tom said. He pressed down harder against Bill and grinned, dragging his hips across Bill’s groin. “Not now.”

“Why not now?” Bill pouted, his eyes wide. “You don’t want to?”

Tom groaned. Of course he wanted to. He’d been wanting to for so very long. “Maybe,” he lied. “Maybe, I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?” Bill rolled out from under Tom and stood up, buttoning his jeans. “Tomi?”

Tom shrugged and looked away, with great effort. “It wasn’t that good…”

Bill remained silent. Tom waited for him to react, waited for him to do something, but all he heard was a quiet sniffle. Tom turned around and saw Bill staring at the floor, eyes and nose red. “Bill??”

“Forget it,” Bill mumbled, running a hand over his face and turning. “Forget it.”

Tom sighed loudly and got up, going to Bill. “Bill, of course I didn’t mean that!”

“You’re just saying that.”

Tom was about to say more but the bell rang downstairs. Someone was at the door. “Fuck,” Tom grumbled. “Bill, I—”

“I gotta get that,” Bill snapped. He turned and left the room. Tom watched him go and mentally kicked himself for what he’d said. Then he physically kicked himself.

He was just messing with Bill, of course. What they’d shared was so important to Tom that it made his stomach ache. The sex had been amazing, as brief as the encounters had been. Just the memories alone drove Tom crazy, especially at night when he was alone and Bill was just a room over.

He was tired of jerking off, he wanted another go at Bill and now he felt like he’d ruined it.

Sighing, he made his way downstairs, finding Andreas and Bill chatting in the kitchen. Tom groaned inwardly, Andreas would be over all night and Tom wouldn’t get a chance to apologize and make it up to Bill.

He felt like he had a lot of making up to do. The next time they had sex had to be perfect. Tom had to make it perfect.

“Hey,” Andreas said when he saw Tom. He was grinning, cheeks pink from the cold outside. “Fuck, can I stay all weekend? I can’t believe your luck!!”

“Of course you can stay,” Bill said sweetly. “It’ll be so fun.”

Tom groaned, and Bill and Andreas looked at him. “Well, Mom didn’t say we could have people over…”

“I was kidding, anyway,” Andreas said, laughing. “No big deal. My mom’s still pretty pissed that I stumbled home with a hangover from New Year’s, so she’d probably freak if she knew I was here.”

“That sucks,” Bill said sympathetically. “I wish you could stay.”

“I can tonight, at least for a while,” Andreas said brightly. “I brought some movies and Mom gave me my allowance today, we should get pizza.”

Tom made a face. Bill was acting so over enthused about Andreas’s presence, he knew he was being punished. “I’m kinda tired, though,” Tom said, faking a yawn. “It was a long day and I’ll probably turn in early or something.”

“Baby,” Bill said cruelly. “Just go to bed now.”

“Fuck off,” Tom said. He was irritated, Bill was being too sensitive.

Andreas stood up, clearing his throat. “Yeah, let’s go watch TV in your parents’ room, they get the good channels.”

“We can camp out in there for the next three days,” Bill said. “While Tom sleeps.”

“Ugh.” Tom rolled his eyes and stalked away.

Tom marched up to his room, shaking his head the entire way. How had he fucked things up so much? He knew Bill couldn’t be totally serious about Andreas staying, but he did know that he’d hurt his brother’s feelings.

“So stupid,” he mumbled. He sat on his bed and sighed. Bill should’ve been with him, and Tom should’ve been over him, kissing, touching… anything.

Instead, he was alone and Bill was downstairs with Andreas.

“Perfect.”

Tom lay down and closed his eyes, dozing off into an unsettled sleep.

**

Bill was hanging off the end of the bed, eating a piece of pizza and watching a naughty movie on a scrambled television channel. Andreas was next to him, groaning.

“I think I saw something,” Andreas said, gesturing to the television with his slice of pizza. “Oh… yeah! Yeah, tits!”

“You’re pathetic,” Bill said, making a face. “I can’t believe I’ve been watching this for almost… two hours? Has it really been two hours?”

Andreas shrugged, his mouth full.

“Andreas, you gotta go,” Bill said bluntly. “Mom said we couldn’t have anyone over.”

“I’m not anyone,” Andreas protested.

“Yeah, but… Whatever,” Bill said. “Mom’s been crazy lately, I’m afraid she’ll find out. She was pissed about New Years.”

“Oh,” Andreas said, nodding. He got up, leaving his paper plate on the couch. “Yeah, my mom, too. Shit, yeah, I should go.”

Bill showed Andreas the door and said goodbye, grinning.

He hadn’t heard a peep from Tom the entire time Andreas was over and he wondered if he’d fallen asleep.

“Time to wake him up,” Bill said. He’d been bugged by Tom’s comment earlier, but he knew his brother was just messing around. Bill knew just how hard Tom came when he was inside him.

Bill was surprised Tom had backed off when Andreas came over, that he hadn’t put up a fight. Bill could imagine just how frustrated Tom must have been about the whole thing. He went up the stairs and paused just outside Tom’s door. He took a few deep breaths to calm himself, Tom hadn’t meant anything, he was just teasing.

“Tomi,” Bill said softly, pushing the door open and wandering in. Tom was sprawled out of the bed, over the covers, and he was snoring lightly. Bill smiled and crawled on top of him, squeezing his shoulders. “Tomi,” he whispered.

Tom flinched. “Wha?”

Bill wrinkled his nose and nuzzled his cheek against Tom’s neck. “Wake up, I kicked Andreas out.”

Tom rubbed at his eyes. He didn’t know what time it was, he didn’t know what day it was. “He’s here?”

“Not anymore.”

“Ungh.” Tom rolled over, pulling Bill onto his chest. Bill kissed Tom’s chin. “You’re not pissed at me?”

“No,” Bill replied. “You’re just an asshole.”

Tom laughed. “Too bad for you.”

Bill grinned. “I couldn’t be mad at you our first weekend alone.”

Tom stroked his hands down Bill’s back, toying with the waistband of his brother’s pants. “You’re horny, aren’t you?”

Bill flushed, squirmed against Tom’s body. “Maybe,” he whispered.

Tom could feel Bill’s erection against his stomach. “Wanna mess around?” Bill ducked his head forward and kissed Tom’s neck gently.

“Oh yeah,” he said, and then Tom tipped his mouth up and caught Bill’s. It started gentle, just slightly open as they shared the warmth of their mouths. And then the kiss deepened and became wet and hard. Tom tickled Bill’s tongue, licked at his teeth, and lapped at the seam of Bill’s lips over and over again until Bill was moaning and grinding down into him.

They necked for long minutes, warming each other up, turning each other on until they were clinging to each other desperately. Tom forced Bill under him and smoothed his hands all up Bill’s tight little body.

“Can I…” He kissed Bill’s chin, his mouth, his neck. “Can I try again?”

Bill whimpered and nodded. “Yes.”

Tom grinned and a rush went through his belly. Bill was going to let him try again. Try to fuck him again. “No one’s home, we don’t have to be careful,” Tom said, raising his eyebrows.

“Oh, god…” Bill let out a loud yelp, and then made a goofy face. “Do it good, Tomi.”

Tom nodded, running his hands down Bill’s body and tugging their shirts up with both his hands. Bill helped, pulling his own shirt over his head and tossing it to the side. “Brr,” Bill whispered. The room was chilly, and Tom felt Bill’s cold skin. Bill was always so cold.

Tom got rid of his shirt and pressed his body flat down against Bill’s trying to warm him up. Bill wriggled deliciously under Tom, clutching at his shoulders and arms. Tom slid his fingers under the waist of Bill’s jeans and boxers and started slipping them down. “You’re about to get a lot colder,” Tom said.

“So warm me up.” Bill kissed Tom’s lips and helped slide his pants off. “Yours, too,” he added.

Tom grinned and got up on his knees, unbuckling his belt. He was hard, matching Bill’s erection, and he was desperate to grind them together. “Help,” Tom said, smirking.

Bill immediately pulled Tom’s jeans down, roughly, and Tom groaned. “Too fast,” Tom said, wincing. His cock stood hard and ready, Bill put his hands all over it. “No,” Tom breathed.

“No?”

Tom shook his head, leaning down and grinding their groins together. Bill let out a scream - because he could. Tom bit his lip to keep from laughing, Bill was being noisier than he’d imagined. “Jeez,” Tom commented. “The neighbors will think you’re dying or something.”

“Put your fingers in me,” Bill said in response. “And find my spot, warm it up.”

Tom groaned, thrust down against Bill again, feeling the bed rock. He let the headboard bang against the wall, loving the sound. “Fuck, I love you,” Tom said. He grabbed Bill’s ass, squeezing it tight and devouring Bill’s neck and chest.

Bill shook under Tom, moaning louder and louder until his voice was hoarse and his throat hurt. Tom’s fingers found his hole, one slipping inside, and Bill cried out even louder.

“Oh… that…” Bill’s hands grabbed Tom’s arms. “That hurts, but don’t stop.”

“I’ll get the lube,” Tom murmured.

“No, don’t stop,” Bill said. “Deeper.”

Tom pressed his finger in and Bill squealed. “But you said it hurts…”

“It’s good,” Bill breathed. “So…oh!”

Tom had found Bill’s prostate and he stroked it teasingly, watching Bill unravel beneath him. “I’m gonna do this until you come,” Tom said.

“Yes, please!”

“Deeper?” Tom knew it wasn’t deeper, he just wanted to hear Bill beg.

“No, oh, no… maybe,” Bill said, his eyes closed. “Just… keep doing that…”

Tom curled his finger against Bill’s spot, marveling at how soft it was. He pushed in, against it, and Bill screamed louder than before. “Good?” Tom asked.

“Fuck, fuck!” Bill pushed his ass against Tom’s hand, pushing Tom’s fingers in deeper himself. “So good, Tomi… Oh… itch it, it’s so achey.”

“Achey?” Tom moved his finger inside, and then added another, scissoring them inside Bill. He stretched Bill’s hole gently and Bill started sweating, shiny droplets clinging to his forehead. “Shit, Bill.”

“Oh, god,” Bill whispered, his lower limbs trembling. “Oh, god, oh god…”

“Louder,” Tom said, Bill’s responses were making him so hard. Bill just nodded and threw his hands backward, grabbing the headboard. “Bill…”

“Uh,” Bill grunted. He winced in pain, shutting his eyes tight. “Oh, Tomi, it hurts so bad but… you’re also making it better, fuck.”

“Harder?”

“So much… harder, yes,” Bill replied, stammering. He bit his lip hard, jittering and vibrating around Tom’s fingers. His cock twitched - was he actually going to come? “Shit, Tom!”

“Wha?”

“Oh…” Bill squeezed his thighs together, his toes curling. He felt so intense, it was different than anything he’d felt before. Tom had made him come this way, it had always been amazing, but this time was better. Tom was going to push inside Bill right after, Bill almost lost his breath thinking about it. “Oh!”

“Come for me,” Tom said encouragingly, fucking Bill’s steadily with his fingers. His cock was achingly hard, he couldn’t wait to slide in Bill. He was opening his brother up, stretching him.

“I’m…” Bill shouted, arched his hips up, and came in long pulsing waves all over his stomach. His body clenched at Tom’s fingers, and they both swore. “Oh, fuck, fuck,” Bill moaned, flopping back on the bed. He rubbed at his face and shivered, pressing down on Tom’s fingers again. “Tomi… Tomi…”

Tom slipped his fingers out and laid his body on Bill’s, feeling the come between them. “Are you okay?”

“Mmm.” Bill closed his eyes and smiled. “Get in me, Tomi, I feel so ready.”

Tom shook against Bill’s body and kissed all the skin he could reach. “Yes.” He rubbed Bill’s sides and sat up, digging in the bedside drawer and finding their lotion. “Fuck, Bill, you look so good.”

Bill blinked shyly. “Hurry up.”

“Hang on,” Tom murmured. He rooted through his drawer. The lotion had to be somewhere. “Fuck, where…”

“Ow.” Bill reached under the pillow, cringing, holding the bottle of lotion. “Tom, why was it under the pillow?”

Tom shrugged. “Jerking off, I guess.” He climbed onto the bed, hovering over Bill. “Put it on me?”

Bill’s eyes flashed. “Okay,” he replied softly. He uncapped the lotion and squirted some into his hand. It made an embarrassing sound, and they both laughed. “Wasn’t me,” Bill said.

“Bill,” Tom groaned. Before he could say anything else, he felt Bill’s hand son his cock, slathering the cool lotion all down his length. Tom’s stomach felt hot; he knew this time was going to be good, he was going to work it slowly, he was going to look out for Bill, make him feel amazing. “God, Bill, your hands…”

“So good, right?” Bill let go of Tom and grinned, still looking dazed from his orgasm. “Tom, I think… I think we’re ready.”

They stared at each other. Everything leading up to the moment had been confident, playful. Tom swallowed hard; he had to fuck Bill good. He had to.

He looked at Bill, wondering how they should do it. “Maybe… How should we?” Tom mumbled.

Bill was already on his back, legs spread eagle. “Now, Tom. Please.”

Tom smiled. “I can see your… everything.”

Bill didn’t even blush. “Tom,” he whined.

“Oh fine,” Tom said. He sat between Bill’s legs and gently prodded at Bill’s hole with his cock. Bill squirmed and thrust his hips up.

“Inside, dummy,” Bill said, poking Tom in the stomach.

Tom stuck out his tongue. “I know that.” He grabbed his cock and pushed at Bill’s hole, feeling the resistance and groaning. He was determined to last longer this time, he had to. He stroked at Bill’s thigh with his free hand and sank the head of his erection inside.

Bill tensed, gasped, and opened to Tom.

“That’s it,” Tom soothed. “That’s it.” He sank in deeper, feeling Bill tighten around him and he couldn’t stop, couldn’t stop from going all the way in.

“Oh, shit,” Bill whined. “You feel so big tonight.”

Tom’s face burned and his back sweated. His hands gripped at Bill’s hips and he didn’t move. “Bill, you are so tight,” he said, his voice pained. He hunched over, falling across Bill’s body, and they both groaned. He kissed Bill’s mouth and shifted his hips, his cock just barely moving in Bill.

“Tomi, that feels… weird,” Bill gasped out. “I think… I think…”

Tom pressed forward and Bill cried out. “Does it hurt?”

“Oh, you’re touching it,” Bill said. “My spot, Tomi. Careful, careful…”

Tom eased out a bit, rested on his elbows, and thrust inside. Bill’s hips followed his. He could see Bill’s mouth open, glistening in the dark room. He could hear a soft, whining moan.

And Bill’s cock jerked against his belly, hardening again.

“Does that feel good?” Tom asked. He wanted to fuck Bill hard, plow into him and lose it… but he held back. “Bill?”

“I like it,” Bill whispered. “Tomi… I think you have to do it… harder, please.”

Tom held himself against Bill, groaning. “Yeah?”

“Yeah… Ooh, you’re right on it, Tom…” Bill let out a loud breath, his back was sweating. “Tomi, Tomi!”

“Yes? Bill?” Tom pulled out a little and Bill locked his legs around Tom’s waist, pulling him close again. Tom could see the look of pain on his face but there was also a sparkle in Bill’s eyes, the trace of determination on his face. Tom knew they were both wanting to make it good. Tom held Bill’s legs and thrust inside, and then pulled back out. He looked at Bill for confirmation. Bill just nodded.

“Oh,” Bill moaned. “Okay, yes… Okay, keep doing that… Oh!!” Bill hissed loudly, tightening his muscles around Tom’s cock. Bill’s erection stood proudly, he was almost as hard as Tom felt, and Tom was instantly proud.

“Bill, you like it,” Tom said, eyes wide. “You like it, you…”

“Yes,” Bill said, grabbing the headboard. “Tom, touch me, touch my…”

Tom wrapped his hand around Bill’s cock and tried to find the rhythm of pumping it with his fist while fucking Bill at the same time. He was off balance, it was like playing the guitar; his hands knew to find their own beat. Tom squeezed down the base of Bill’s cock and Bill screamed so loud that Tom was sure they’d be receiving a call from the neighbors.

“God, Bill, you,” Tom grunted, steadily easing in and out of Bill. His own orgasm was approaching fast, he tried keeping it at bay. “Fuck, gonna come in you… so hard, fuck.”

“Ohh,” Bill groaned. Bill was being dangerously loud, half of Tom’s arousal was from how much Bill was letting loose. Tom leaned down on one arm and kept fisting Bill’s cock, kept moving his hips back and forth against Bill. The sweat mingled between their bodies and Tom tasted salt on his lips. He licked at it hungrily, looking down at Bill. Bill was so far gone, writhing and twisting beneath him. Tom’s chest tightened, he was making his little brother feel so good.

Tom released Bill’s cock and tugged at his balls. Bill shouted and wiggled against Tom, bucking his hips and digging into Tom’s back with rigid toes.

“Are you close?” Tom managed to gasp out.

Bill just moaned, his back arching and his hands grabbing at Tom’s dreadlocks, pulling him down. Tom humped at Bill and joined their lips.

“Can you come?” Tom asked between kisses. He couldn’t stroke Bill in this position, but he could feel Bill’s cock ride across his belly. “Can you come, Bill?”

“I…” Bill’s eye squeezed closed and he trembled beneath Tom. “Gonna…”

“Yeah? Come, please, Bill.”

Bill pulled at Tom’s hair and keened loudly, brightly, his hips jerking up one last time before Tom felt Bill’s hot come on his stomach.

“Shit, shit,” Tom swore, his cock squeezed incredibly tight inside Bill’s body. He fucked Bill through his orgasm, sitting back and fucking Bill until tears welled up in Bill’s eyes. It was too much for Tom, and Bill’s face contorted in pain. Tom pulled out, stroked himself once, and came across Bill’s hips and belly.

“Tomi,” Bill whined, running long fingers through their come. “Tomi, in me.”

Tom shook his head, but pushed his oversensitive cock back into Bill, wincing at the feeling, and collapsing on Bill’s body.

“You like it,” Tom said tiredly, smiling. He stroked Bill’s hair, and kissed his face. “You liked that, right?”

“I’m gonna get better,” Bill said, his eyes darting around Tom’s face and body. “It’ll get better, Tom, we’re gonna be so good at that. I want you to come in me so bad.”

“But you liked it.”

Bill nodded. “I liked it.”

Tom smiled lazily, leaning his head down. “I’m so fucking glad you liked it because… I really fucking love it.”

Bill adjusted himself as Tom pulled out of him, and then lay by Tom’s side, draping his naked limbs all over. Tom wrapped an arm around Bill and pulled him close, they were both sticky with orgasm. Tom had never felt better.

“I made you come,” Tom said. “I made you come by fucking you. That’s fucking amazing.”

“And we have the whole weekend to do it.”

Their lips met and they dozed together.

Don't Tell Mom 7/?

Mon, 19 Nov 2007 08:06:07 GMT

Title: Don't Tell Mom (7/?)
Previous Chapters: Here
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17 (eventually)
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: What Mom doesn't know won't kill her.

She immediately turned around, her back to the sleeping boys, and she felt like she was going to stumble into a wall. They had been innocently tucked under the blankets, a divide of pillows between them.

But Bill’s pants, something turned inside her.

Simone sat down at the kitchen table again. She couldn't get what she'd just seen out of her head.

Bill's pajama pants, in a crumpled heap, on the floor.

She leaned back in the chair and exhaled slowly. Perhaps it meant nothing. Perhaps Bill was just being Bill, and he couldn't decide on what pants to sleep in, so he'd just brought two pairs down. The unworn pair had ended up on the floor.

Simone frowned. Or maybe it was something more.

She shook her head, why had she immediately jumped to the conclusion that something was going on? Was she sick in the head to think that about her boys? Or was she just really perceptive?

“What could they have done?” she whispered. She put her face in her hands and sighed deeply. Surely nothing too bad. But anything would be bad, anything would be too bad.

Standing up slowly, Simone decided to go back to bed, to think about it some more. She didn’t want to think about it at all, but she knew it would be plaguing her for a long time to come.

Or perhaps, she decided, it was nothing.

She wearily went back to her room, not looking in the living room as she passed it.

Bill cracked an eye open. The light from under their parents’ door was off, and all was quiet again.

“Tom,” he whispered.

“Mm?”

Bill sat up slightly. “Were you asleep?”

“I…” Tom opened his eyes, yawning. “Maybe.”

“That was close,” Bill said, allowing a smile to creep onto his lips. He winced, shifting. “Ouch.”

Tom woke up instantly, moving closer to Bill. “Oh god, are you okay?”

“I will be,” Bill replied, kissing Tom’s nose. “I wanna wash up, though… and I’m hungry.”

Tom smiled and dipped his head just enough to brush their lips together. “Does it still hurt?” he asked, his voice hushed.

Bill nodded. “I won’t forget,” he said. “I’ll be feeling it all day tomorrow, Tomi. Feeling how you did it to me.”

Tom swallowed hard, and clutched at Bill’s shoulders, dragging his naked body up. “Grab your pants, I want to wash you up.”

**

They locked the bathroom door and Tom turned to Bill, slipping his pants down. The same pants their mother had seen on the floor. But of course they didn’t know that.

“Why’d I even put them on?” Bill teased.

“In case we ran into Grandma in the kitchen,” Tom said. Bill laughed and Tom knelt, his lips brushing Bill’s belly. Bill gasped softly. “Turn around.” Bill hesitated and Tom slid his hands up Bill’s naked thighs, slowly turning him.

“What… are you doing?” Bill asked. He could feel Tom’s hot breath on the small of his back.

“I’m going to kiss it better,” Tom rasped. Bill tried to tell him no, that it wasn’t necessary but Tom’s lips pressed between his ass, his nose bumping down the crease. It took a few sloppy, wet kisses for him to find Bill’s sore hole, but when he did, Bill couldn’t help but moan.

“Tomi,” Bill sighed, closing his eyes. “That’s… different.”

“Yeah?” Tom kissed it again, letting his tongue out, lingering on Bill’s hole.

“What’s it taste like?” Bill asked, looking over hi s shoulder.

“Like you.” Tom paused. “And me.”

“Of course,” Bill murmured. He put a hand on Tom’s head and rubbed a couple of dreads between his thumb and forefinger. Tom stood, kissing a trail up Bill’s back, and then his neck. He sucked the skin there and Bill moaned again, unable to stop his toes from curling into the tile.

“Okay,” Tom said. “Gonna clean you.”

Bill grinned and hopped onto the counter, spreading his thighs. They both winced at the dried blood spattered there, and Tom frowned at how red Bill’s bottom was.

“I’m sorry,” Tom murmured, touching just under Bill’s balls gently. “I didn’t want to do that.”

Bill shook his head and pulled Tom’s neck toward him, bumping their noses. “Don’t be sorry, I loved it.”

“Bullshit.”

“I did,” Bill said softly. “It hurt like fuck but it was worth it.”

“Yeah?” Tom eyed Bill skeptically.

Bill nodded. “You really liked it?”

“Are you kidding me?” Tom wrapped his arms around Bill’s little body. “I came in like… a minute. I feel so dumb. I hurt you, it was supposed to feel good.”

“It felt good here,” Bill said, placing a gentle hand on his chest, just above his heart. “I’ll never forget the look on your face when you got in me. Did it really feel that good?”

Tom felt overly emotional, like he might cry or something equally embarrassing, and he kissed Bill’s chin. “You felt the best,” Tom said. His hands trailed down Bill’s chest. “But you didn’t come.”

“I don’t care.”

“I care.”

Bill smiled, wincing as Tom’s finger traveled a little too harshly across his sore hole. “Careful.”

Tom frowned, feeling guilty. “I hate that I hurt you.”

“Only a little.” Bill nuzzled Tom’s neck and then leaned back, making a face. “I’m a mess. Clean it.”

“Me?” Tom asked.

“Yeah, you did it.”

Tom laughed a little, feeling himself relax. Bill liked it, he wasn’t hurt. He liked it. He was smiling, joking. “You’re okay,” Tom said, just to make sure.

“I’m okay.” Bill turned the faucet on and ran his hand under it, waiting for the warm water. “We have to be quiet.”

Tom took a small towel from the rack and held it under the pouring water, squeezing it. “You were quiet.”

“Next time, I wanna fuckin’ scream my head off,” Bill said. “Because that’s what it felt like. Screaming.”

Tom groaned. “You’re gonna kill me.”

“Payback.” Bill smiled sweetly.

Tom rolled his eyes and started sliding the wet towel up and down Bill’s thighs, cleaning the blood and come. Bill was flinching with each touch closer to his hole and Tom felt guilty, but there was a hint of sparkle in Bill’s eyes. “You’re gonna milk this for all it’s worth,” Tom said.

“No, it hurts.”

Tom narrowed his eyes. “I don’t believe you.”

Bill made a whining sound and twisted away from Tom, biting his lip to keep from laughing. “I didn’t even come.”

“Whose fault is that?”

Bill drew in a sharp breath. “There was no way it was happening,” he said, laughing. “Okay, okay. It’s no big deal. Fuck, I’m starving.”

“Me too.” Tom bent down and took Bill’s cock in his mouth instantly, and Bill hissed shrilly, putting his hands in Tom’s hair.

“Tomi, no,” Bill said, in an entirely unconvincing manner. “I…” Bill moaned over the running faucet, leaning back against the medicine cabinet mirror and holding Tom’s head down.

Tom let Bill guide his movements and he tried to give the best head he could. It wasn’t his forte, but he felt very tender toward Bill at the moment, and nearly choked himself trying to take all of Bill down his throat.

Apparently, choking was good. Bill squealed as Tom’s throat squeezed around his aching erection.

“Tomi, yes,” Bill said this time. He stopped guiding Tom’s head and began stroking his head, his face. “I love you, oh… oh!”

Tom let Bill’s cock slip from his mouth and he tongued the head, watching Bill’s eyes flutter closed, his hands shaking on the counter. He let a finger creep down Bill’s thigh, searching as gently as he could for Bill’s entrance.

When he found it, he pet it gently, sucking Bill back in his mouth.

The sensation for Bill was nothing short of amazing. It hurt and ached in so many wonderful ways. His toes curled and he let Tom slip a finger inside. His brother was being so very careful that Bill wanted to cry or come. Or both.

“I’m gonna… fuck!” Bill jerked against the mirror and Tom’s finger slipped in to the second knuckle, his fingertip bumping Bill’s prostate. That’s all it took for Bill to see stars and come right on Tom’s hungry tongue.

Tom backed up and gasped, licking his lips and grinning. Bill had his legs rigid, he was holding the side of the mirror and gaping, wide eyed.

“Fuck,” Bill said again, softer this time. “I hope no one heard.”

Tom ran his forearm over his mouth and shrugged. “I kind of don’t care.”

“Tom,” Bill wailed, and then he slid off the counter and onto Tom. Tom toppled to the ground and Bill covered him with licks and kisses, Tom protesting playfully.

“What now?” Tom asked. “Now that, you know, we had sex.”

Bill sat back and squinted. “I’m really hungry.”

“There’s gotta be some potatoes left.”

Bill was already pulling his pants on. He switched the faucet off and groaned. “I think Grandpa ate them all.”

“No, you ate them all,” Tom replied, tossing the small towel on the floor.

“Yeah, I did,” Bill admitted. He paused, smiling shyly. “Merry Christmas.”

“Best fuckin’ Christmas I’ve ever had.”

Bill blushed to his ear tips. They unlocked the door and headed for the kitchen.

**

“Tom, can I talk to you a minute?”

Tom was on his way out the door, hat and gloves on. He was going to meet Andreas down at the park, but his mother was standing in the kitchen, looking tired. The relatives had just left, and Bill was still sleeping.

“Yeah, Mom,” Tom said, putting his backpack down. “What is it?”

Simone looked around, making sure they were alone, and she sat down at the table, gesturing to the chair across from her. “I need to speak with you about something. Something impor… serious.”

“Oh.” Tom chewed at his lip and sat down hesitantly. “Serious?”

Feeling nervous about confronting her own son, Simone cleared her throat and fumbled with her sleeve. She had every intention of asking Tom what he’d been doing with Bill, to Bill. She had to know, for her own sanity. She had to confirm her suspicions.

She’d decided the night before that she wouldn’t say anything. How could she? She couldn’t even imagine uttering the words to either of her sons.

But then she’d woken up, made some coffee, and went into the bathroom to run a hot bath. As she was changing into her robe she’d noticed a towel in the corner of the room, bunched up. She’d sighed, having two sons meant a lot of picking up after them.

She was about to toss the towel into the hamper when her eyes caught something they shouldn’t have. A small splotch of what had to be dried blood stained the corner of the towel.

What it meant, she couldn’t be sure, but it made her heart race. Was Tom hurting Bill? Maybe it wasn’t what she thought, maybe something else was going on.

The only thing she was certain of now was that something was happening.

She looked at Tom from across the table. She couldn’t imagine that sweet, innocent boy doing anything to her Bill.

“I found a towel in the bathroom,” Simone said, watching Tom’s face redden a bit. “There was blood on it. What happened?”

Tom swallowed and looked down.

“Tell me the truth.”

“I… I don’t know.”

“Did you hurt Bill?” Simone regretted it immediately as a pain flashed through Tom’s eyes.

“No!” Tom said loudly. He stood. “It was dumb, I tried to uh…” Tom crossed his arms. “Shave.”

Simone raised an eyebrow. “Shave?”

“Yeah, um, and I cut myself.”

Simone didn’t see a mark on Tom’s face and her heart dropped. For a moment she believed him. “I don’t see a cut,” she said.

Tom shrugged. “I didn’t shave my face.”

“Then where…” she trailed off.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Tom said smoothly. “Are we done?”

Simone nodded dumbly. Tom wasn’t lying; no son could lie that flawlessly to his own mother. Or so she hoped. “Okay, well, be careful with that,” she said.

“I’ll be more careful next time, that’s for sure,” Tom said.

“Have fun,” Simone said awkwardly. She waved him off.

Tom stepped into the cool air, relieved that he’d ducked her questions. He didn’t know exactly what she was implying, but he knew he’d thrown her off the trail of whatever it was.

Then he stopped walking. He’d just told his mother that he’d cut himself shaving his…

He shook his head, shoved his hands in his pockets, and kept walking.

**

“We got wine, two bottles of it,” Bill said proudly. “And some champagne… Same thing, maybe.”

“Of course it’s not, idiot,” Tom said, not unkindly. It was New Year’s Eve, and the twins had begged their mother and Gordon to let them have a small party. Simone and Gordon had agreed, they had been invited to the neighbor’s party. The twins had invited Andreas - their only friend from school - and they’d told Georg and Gustav to stop by.

Andreas put a bottle of wine between his legs and pulled at the cork. “I claim this one.”

“You can’t claim a bottle,” Bill whined. “Give me it, you’re ruining it.”

Tom sighed loudly and took the bottle from Bill and Andreas. He grabbed the corkscrew and pulled it out easily. “It’s only nine, you can’t get trashed now.”

“What makes you think I’m getting trashed?” Bill smiled sweetly at his brother, and Tom’s belly sank to the floor.

“You’re a lightweight,” Tom said, recovering. “Seriously, I’m gonna be kicking both of you out of here in an hour. So fucking obnoxious.”

Andreas laughed. “Give me some.”

“We have to wait for Georg and Gustav,” Bill said. “They said they’d stop by.”

“Doubt they will,” Tom said glumly.

Bill made a face. “I’m not enough of a party for you?”

Both Andreas and Tom rolled their eyes. “We’re having a bottle!” Andreas declared. “This one.” He pointed to the open bottle in Tom’s hand. “And if we get trashed, we get trashed. Now pour me a glass.”

Tom couldn’t argue with that logic. He poured them each a tall glass, emptying the bottle. They toasted to their health and quickly downed their drinks. Tom was right, they were all going to get trashed before midnight.

By the time Georg and Gustav showed up, just before eleven, the three boys were giggly drunk, messing with their Playstation and making prank phone calls.

“Children these days,” Georg remarked. He’d brought more alcohol, vodka and rum. Real stuff.

“This is a party?” Gustav said, grinning. “Oh well, it’s better than the last.”

“Where were you?” Tom asked. He felt very young, and wanted his older friends to think he was as mature as them. But with the way Bill was rolling around on the floor, sometimes ending up in his lap, it was difficult.

“We were at my ex’s party,” Georg said, taking his coat off. “It was okay, but everyone was too…”

“We like you guys better,” Gustav finished.

Bill beamed at them. “That’s because I’m… Hey, is that vodka?”

Georg laughed, setting it down on the table. “Yeah, we stole it from Allysa’s stash. My ex,” he added.

“We should have stolen her,” Gustav commented. “She looked so good.”

Georg scowled at him. “Yesterday’s news,” he said, opening the vodka. “You children know what a shot glass is? This is Drinking 101.”

“It’s one of those little cups, right?” Bill hiccupped. “They’re cute.”

Andreas stood up, shaking his head. “He’s already trashed,” he slurred, apparently trying to appear cool to the older boys he only sort of knew. “I’ll get some shot cups.”

“Glasses,” Tom corrected him.

Andreas’s cheeks pinked as he went to the kitchen. Georg took a sip from the vodka bottle. “So, who should I prank call?”

“We’re not really prank calling anyone, or I’m not,” Tom said, proud that he could still speak without slurring. “We could do something else.”

“No way, I’m calling Alyssa,” Georg said, taking a swig of straight vodka. He shuddered as he swallowed and reached for the phone.

“She looked so hot,” Gustav said, taking the bottle from Georg. He took a long gulp and passed it to Bill.

Bill shook his head. “I want mine in… um… one of those cute glasses.”

“Girl,” Gustav said. He sat down next to Georg. “Gonna call?”

“Yeah, I hope she doesn’t have caller ID.”

Bill scooted close to Tom, pressing the bottle into his hands. “Georg’s going to be talking to her all night,” Bill whispered. Tom held up the bottle and Bill laughed. “Some party, huh?”

Tom took a tentative sip of the vodka, feeling it burn down his throat. He wiped at his mouth and looked at Bill. Bill’d done his hair just the way Tom liked, soft and curly, falling into his eyes. And his makeup looked just…

‘Lovely,’ Tom decided. He touched Bill’s throat with the backs of his knuckles, already feeling the warm buzz of vodka working through his system. “Hey.”

Bill batted his eyelashes and they both laughed. “This is the best party I’ve ever been to,” Bill said. He nudged Tom in the shoulder. “Well, besides the one we had Christmas night.”

“Oh yeah, because Grandma is such a party animal,” Tom cracked, taking another curious sip of the vodka.

Bill’s lips turned up into a smirk. “After,” was all he said.

Tom blinked and then felt a surge of arousal flush through his entire body. “Oh.”

“You liked that party a lot,” Bill continued. Tom nodded dumbly, remembering the feel of being inside Bill’s tight body. They hadn’t done anything since then, of course. Tom was wary of their mother and of hurting Bill, and Bill was still recovering. “Get me a little drunker and we’ll have another party,” Bill said.

“When?”

Bill hummed a little, sipping daintily from his wine glass. He blinked at Tom, smiling, and shrugged. “This year or next?”

Tom wrinkled his nose. “That is so corny.”

“Your pick.”

Tom looked around. Georg was on the phone and Gustav was laughing, his attention focused on Georg.

“I want my midnight kiss,” Bill whispered.

Tom’s belly ached. Bill looked so incredibly delicious. “You’ll get it,” Tom said. “You’ll definitely get it.”

Bill smiled sweetly and took the vodka bottle, pouring some into a plastic cup. “I’m gonna put some apple juice in this.”

“You baby,” Tom teased. “So… really? You want to… do it again?”

Bill nodded as he stood up. “Soon. Tonight.”

Tom watched him walk away, into the kitchen. Georg howled something about call waiting, and Tom raced over to the phone. “Probably Mom or Gordon,” he said. “Don’t worry, I won’t hang up on your girlfriend,” he said, taking the phone from Georg.

“Ex!” Georg shouted. “Hold on, Allysa.”

Tom rolled his eyes and clicked over from the loud party scene on the other end of the phone. “Hello?” he said.

“Tom,” came Simone’s voice. “How’re you guys doing over there?”

“We’re fine, Mom,” Tom said, keeping his eyes on the kitchen for Bill. “Georg and Gustav came over… We’re just playing games and stuff.”

“Oh,” she said. “Where’s Bill?”

“In the kitchen,” Tom replied. “Are you guys having fun?”

Simone laughed shortly. “Yes, yes. Why is Bill in the kitchen?”

Tom frowned. His mother was acting strange. “He’s thirsty.”

“You boys don’t drink too much,” Simone said. “Just the three bottles we got you, right?”

Tom watched Bill and Andreas return from the kitchen with shot glasses. They sat next to Georg and he poured out shots for everyone.

“Of course,” Tom lied.

“We’re probably not coming back tonight,” she said. “Are the boys sleeping over?” She sounded tense.

“I dunno.” Tom watched Bill take a shot of the vodka and nearly keel over. The other boys burst out into laughter. He wanted to get off the phone, his mother’s questions were making him anxious.

“They should stay if they’re drinking at all,” Simone said firmly. “You guys can all camp out in the living room.”

“I’ll probably just go to my room,” Tom said. Simone coughed. “Anyway, I gotta go, we’re playing cards.”

“Can I talk to Bill?”

Bill was a giggling pile on the floor, letting Andreas dump a shot into his mouth. Tom’s stomach flipped as Bill wriggled against the carpet, his eyes bright and happy.

“We’re sorta busy,” Tom said. “Can we just talk to you tomorrow?”

Simone didn’t say anything for half a moment and then she cleared her throat. “I don’t want you two to be alone.”

“Why? We’re old enough to be home alone,” Tom said.

“Well, if you’re drinking I’d just rather… you didn’t, okay?”

Tom was confused but he just agreed. “I’ll make them stay.”

“Good. Happy New Year, sweetheart,” she said.

“Yeah, you, too, bye.” He hung up the phone feeling very strange, his stomach in knots. But then Georg and Gustav attacked him and forced both rum and vodka down his throat and soon he wasn’t feeling much of anything.

**

Tom wasn’t entirely sure how they’d gotten into his room. He wasn’t entirely sure how he’d gotten Bill’s pants off, or how he had three fingers inside Bill’s body. But what he was sure of, was that Bill was moaning and grinding up into him, and it felt fucking fantastic.

All the feelings came in waves, large flashes of overwhelming arousal. Tom was naked too, he realized.

Where was everyone else? Fuck them, he was busy with his brother.

“Yeah, Tomi, please,” Bill begged beneath him. “Get it in me.”

“God,” Tom managed, shaking his hair out and holding Bill’s arms down with his free hand. “Hold it, hold still.”

“I can’t,” Bill moaned, writhing uncontrollably. “I feel so funny, my head is fuzzy and I want you to fuck me.”

Tom’s stomach swirled. “I’m gonna.”

“It’s almost midnight,” Bill said, eyes wide. “Look… Look. Oh. Wait. Happy New Years.”

“Really??”

“I don’t fucking know,” Bill groaned. He cringed. “Not too hard… Not too…”

Tom glanced up at his clock. “It’s not New Years.”

“Damn.”

They grinded, Bill was very hard and their cocks mingled, rubbing together. As Tom stared down at Bill, hazily drunk, he knew he could come sloppily all over Bill’s stomach and still be ready for more. He had a plan, though. He was going to push his cock inside Bill.

“Ten minutes until New Years,” Bill sang. “Ohh… Tom, oh, Tom!”

“Stop moving,” Tom said dumbly. “You move so much. You never stop moving, why do you move so much?”

“Because I’m ready,” Bill gasped out, eyes wide as saucers. “Okay, okay. We’re so ready.”

“This will be amazing,” Tom mumbled, pressing his fingers deeper inside Bill. “Amazing, amazing…”

“Fuck!” Bill squeaked. He squeezed his muscles around Tom and Tom grunted, pulling his fingers out. “Tom!”

“I know. I know!” Tom rolled off the bed and started knocking around the room, irrationally angry for a moment. “Where’s the fucking… fucking… fucking… That lotion?”

“I don’t know,” Bill replied happily. “You’ll find it!”

“I’m not finding… Oh,” Tom said, his hand bumping into the bottle. He picked it up and squeezed some out, coating his hard cock as he walked. Bill made a whining sound and grabbed for Tom’s thighs, pulling him close.

“Let me,” Bill pleaded. He took Tom’s cock in his hands and rubbed it up and down quickly. Tom groaned and jerked backwards.

“Don’t,” Tom warned. “I’ll fuckin’ explode all over the house.”

Bill flopped to his back and spread his legs. “Come on.”

Tom was clumsy drunk, he suddenly had a flash of memory; Andreas passing out on the couch downstairs as Georg and Gustav drew penises all over his face.

He got between Bill’s legs. “Where are Georg and Gustav?”

“Left,” Bill sighed. “In me, now.”

“Where?” Tom’s hips moved forward and his cock bumped against Bill’s entrance. He stared down at Bill.

“That stupid girl’s house,” Bill said. His legs wrapped around Tom’s waist. “Now do it.”

That’s all Tom needed, that last demand, and he pushed himself into Bill, crying out as his cock was squeezed in that tight heat. “Oh shit,” he moaned. “Oh god.”

Bill arched up, his face contorted in pain. “Hurry, get it all in,” he gritted out. “Hurry, Tomi.”

Tom shoved in, not thinking. He was too clumsy to be gentle, too drunk to tell Bill no, they shouldn’t have been doing this again so soon. Bill was probably still sore from Christmas. “Is it bad?” Tom asked, already moving his hips. He couldn’t stop himself from pulling out and pushing back in.

Bill clutched at the sheets. “I love you,” Bill said, his voice tight. “It doesn’t hurt as much.”

Tom bumped their mouths together. “I love you, too,” he said. “I want it to feel good. Does it feel good?” He worked his cock in and out of Bill, wondering if he could hit Bill’s little spot.

Bill seemed to be concentrating too hard to reply. Tom shook as he fucked Bill.

“Bill?”

“Yes…”

“It does?”

Bill scrunched his face up, trying to relax his whole body. It hurt a little but other than that, he couldn’t feel anything. Good or bad. “Ow… No, not really. Uh…”

“Fuck,” Tom grunted, pushing deep inside Bill. Bill winced and made a squeaking sound, and Tom leaned down to sloppily kiss him. He held himself against Bill, watching his little brother’s face. “Your little spot, is it there?”

“I don’t know,” Bill mumbled, his eyes closing. “Are you in there?”

Tom pulled back. “What?”

“Oh, fuck, you are,” Bill replied, smiling crazily. “Maybe my head hurts, I don’t know. Maybe I should keep drinking.”

“No more,” Tom said. He started moving again, gripping Bill’s knees, squeezing them. Bill was babbling on about absolutely nothing, slipping in and out of consciousness. “Bill, stay here.”

“I’m going nowhere,” Bill said, looking up. “Oh!!”

“Oh?”

Bill bit his lip and held onto Tom’s shoulders. “Hang on… Hang on…”

Tom sighed, moving more intensely. Bill contracted his muscles around Tom’s cock because he liked the face Tom made when he did that. Tom cried out, jerking forward and cursing loudly.

“Bill, Bill, Bill,” Tom moaned. He started feeling warm and heavy, his groin was throbbing. “Fuck, I’m gonna come in you, okay? Okay? Bill?”

“Yes,” Bill whispered. “I love you, Tom, so much, please come in me. It’ll be nice.”

Tom kissed Bill again and then supported himself with his arms, shoving into Bill one more time. His knees shook and he came sloppily, mostly inside Bill, but having to pull out and move backward.

“Oh, Bill,” he breathed, shaking and falling forward. He rested his cheek on Bill’s belly, and clutched at Bill’s legs, hanging on.

Bill stroked soft hands through Tom’s dreads, watching his brother’s eyes slip shut as he panted. “That good?” Bill felt immensely proud at the satisfied noise Tom made.

“I love you, so good,” Tom said. He kissed Bill’s hips. “This time was even better.”

“You’re drunk,” Bill said, smiling. Tom crawled up his body, raining kisses all over Bill’s skin as he moved.

“You’re drunk,” Tom said. He kissed Bill’s neck and throat. “Did it hurt?”

“Yeah,” Bill said. “Only a little, I liked it.”

Tom grinned, his hand petting Bill’s half hard cock. “I want you to love it.”

“I’m gonna, I swear,” Bill said. “Mmm, touch me, Tomi.”

Tom stroked Bill, and with his other hand prodded gently at Bill’s sore opening. “I’ll last longer, too,” Tom said, pushing his finger in deeper. Bill squeaked. “I’ll fuck you forever.” Things were getting hazy for Tom, he looked over at the bedside clock. It was five after midnight. “Happy New Years.” He curled his finger, finding that little spot, and Bill cried out.

“You just… oh! You just gotta hit that with your…” Bill’s hips arched up and he shook. “I’m gonna come so fast, don’t stop.”

“We probably should go back down,” Tom mumbled. He itched Bill’s insides, pressing in hard. “Mom said…”

“What did Mom say?” Bill bit on his lip, closing his eyes and struggling to keep himself from exploding. “Oh, oh, oh…”

“She said she didn’t want us to be alone,” Tom replied, laughing. He laughed so hard that he fell on Bill, and Bill groaned, squirming under Tom. “Oh god, yeah, because when we’re alone…”

“Stuff happens,” Bill whispered. He felt Tom’s finger touch the perfect spot and his knees shook. A burst of heat flowed through his body and he came, hard against Tom. “Shit, shit.”

“I’m glad we’re alone,” Tom mumbled, blinking to stay awake. He looked Bill’s body up and down. “Because I don’t want anyone to ever see that but me.”

“They won’t.” Bill rolled onto his stomach and buried his face in the mattress, his shoulders were trembling. Tom rested a hand on Bill’s back and the skin tensed under his fingers.

“Bill?”

Bill lifted his head. “Let’s go back,” he said. “Ugh, clothes.”

“You’re all over me.”

“Yeah.” Bill swallowed and stood up, keeping his balance with his arms. “Happy New Year,” he said, grinning. “We missed it, fuck. When did Mom say that?”

“She called.” Tom reached for his pants. “She sounded weird.”

“Hm.” Bill burst out laughing. “Well, she’d be pretty mad.”

“She’ll never know,” Tom said, his voice suddenly very serious. “We’ll keep it secret forever and we’ll always be together. Okay?”

Bill nodded and hugged Tom around the waist. “Forever, Tomi.”

Tom squeezed Bill hard and hoped to God it was true.

Don't Tell Mom (6/?)

Mon, 12 Nov 2007 08:14:21 GMT

Title: Don't Tell Mom (6/?)
Previous Chapters: Here
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17 (eventually)
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: What Mom doesn't know won't kill her.

“Boys, good news,” Simone said, coming down the steps of the basement where Tom and Bill had been messing around with some new songs.

“What?” Tom looked up from his guitar and frowned.

“Well, you know how we always go to your aunt and uncle’s house for Christmas Eve dinner?” Simone asked.

“Shit,” Bill said. “I forgot we did that.”

“Bill,” Simone scolded. “Well, we did do that but this year, it’s happening here.”

“Oh?” Bill stood up, folding his arms.

“The whole family is coming here for Christmas Eve dinner,” Simone said, smiling. “I want you guys to help me set everything up.”

Tom and Bill looked at each other. “But they’ll be leaving, right?” Bill asked.

“Yeah, they’re not like, staying over?” Tom added.

Simone gave them a look. “No,” she said. “Don’t act so excited.”

Bill laughed a little. “I am excited! It’s just, we always spend Christmas together. You know, just the four of us.” Bill tried to sound sincere, tried not to sound too appalled at the prospect of spending the night with his extended family.

He couldn’t tell his mother the truth, of course. He couldn’t tell her that he was planning on giving himself to Tom on Christmas Eve.

“It’ll be fun,” Bill said.

Simone sighed and then pulled two envelopes out of her purse. “These came in the mail for you, from your father.”

Bill tensed at just the mention of their father, and Tom squeezed his arm. “Last year he didn’t even send us cards,” Tom said. “He said he’d stop by and give them to us in person.”

“But he didn’t,” Bill said.

“Good,” Tom muttered.

Simone handed the envelopes to them. “Just try not to be too angry with him. He’s… doing his best, I am sure.”

Tom rolled his eyes. Bill just started tearing his card open, sitting down on the arm of the couch.

“Anyways, dinner is soon, boys,” Simone said, starting to walk up the stairs. “We’re having spaghetti.”

“Yum,” Tom said, sitting down on the couch next to Bill. He tossed his unopened card on the floor. “What’s he got to say?”

Bill peered at the card. “Not much… Merry Christmas. Why’d he even bother?”

Tom rubbed Bill’s leg, pulling his brother closer. “Two weeks until Christmas.”

Bill dropped the card on the floor, next to Tom’s, and slid into Tom’s lap. “Don’t remind me,” he groaned playfully.

“Hey,” Tom said, grinning and punching Bill soft on the arm. “What do you mean by that?”

Bill smiled coyly. “Nothing.”

Tom pinched Bill in the ass and Bill squeaked. “Nothing?” Tom teased. “Thinking about returning the gift you got for me?”

Bill sighed theatrically. “Can’t get rid of it… Someone has to take it.”

“Hmm.” Tom slid his hand down the back of Bill’s jeans and cupped his bottom, squeezing. “Can I touch it again?”

“Tom,” Bill whispered, glancing toward the stairs. “No.”

“I’ll be quiet.”

“I won’t.”

Tom laughed, pressing his lips to Bill’s neck. “You’ll like it.”

“I know.”

They started rocking together, Tom massaging the crease of Bill’s ass. Bill let the tiniest of moans escape from his lips and he blushed, looking over his shoulder at the stairs nervously. “Tomi…”

“Sshh.”

“Mom will see…” Bill trailed off, biting his lip. Tom was rubbing at his hole with a finger, causing Bill to squirm deliciously in his lap. “She’ll come down… To the left, Tomi.”

They never did this, they never took the chance. They were always so careful when their parents were home. They wouldn’t even look at each other too long, get too near each other. The tension between them had been steadily building, rising. It was too much, it was making them careless.

Tom pulled his fingers from Bill’s ass and put them into his mouth, getting them good and wet. Bill gasped and latched his arms around Tom’s neck, and Tom slid his hand back down Bill’s pants. Bill felt Tom’s warm, wet finger slide down his crease and then, it nudged his opening. “Oh,” Bill whimpered.

“Be quiet.”

“I am,” Bill whispered. “You make it so good.”

Tom slipped a finger in, and then added another almost right away. Bill closed his eyes and tried to relax, letting his arms hang limp over Tom’s shoulders. Tom leaned back and pulled Bill with him, pressing his fingers deeper in Bill. Bill tensed his fingernails against Tom’s back, twirling the fabric from Tom’s shirt in his hold.

“Will you, oh, do it some more tonight?” Bill asked breathlessly.

Tom twisted his fingers inside Bill’s body, curious about how tight and hot his brother was. “I’ll do it more now,” Tom said.

Bill squeaked. “Okay, okay, but gentle.”

“I wanna do it hard,” Tom said. He began tugging at the zipper of Bill’s pants, popping the button open.

“I’ll yell,” Bill said, trying to shove Tom away a bit. “Mom’ll come down and then we’ll be fucked.”

“You’ll be fucked,” Tom said. His eyes were black, and he worked Bill’s pants off. Bill shook his head and Tom toppled Bill over, splayed out on his back on the couch. “Let me get a few in there.”

“But I said—”

Tom licked at his fingers and pushed them sloppily inside Bill, uncaring as Bill made soft, mewling protests. Bill wanted him to, Tom knew, and he loved the shocked gasps Bill made as Tom didn’t give him a choice.

Bill arched away from Tom and exposed his throat, closing his eyes and curling his toes. The feeling of Tom’s fingers so deep inside him was curious and wonderful, strange and new. Bill sighed loud and his breath caught in his throat. He hissed, squeezing Tom’s shoulders urgently.

“Tom,” Bill whispered. “We can’t. You can’t. I’ll scream…”

“I know.” Tom twisted his finger and added another, causing Bill to squeal. “Don’t scream, okay?”

“You want to… you want to fuck me?” Bill looked down at Tom, and Tom nodded.

“So bad.”

“Maybe for now just movie sex. Oh!” Bill gasped; Tom had three fingers in him. It was tight, much more painful than before, and Bill gritted his teeth. “Tomi, I can’t… Oh…”

“There.” Tom smiled, curling his longest finger inside Bill, petting a warm spot inside him. “There, is that something?”

Bill’s face was twisted in silent confusion. It was something. “Yeah. Oh… softer.”

“Softer?”

“No, harder.”

Tom grinned, loving the feel of Bill seated on his fingers. “Move with me… Bend backward.”

“I can’t,” Bill said, cringing. He carefully leaned back, holding onto Tom for support. “Oh, wait… Oh…”

“Bill,” Tom said quietly. “It’d be so easy. I’ve got like, my whole hand in there. Let me.”

“Ugh.” Bill squirmed, and Tom loomed over him, brushing their lips together.

“Let me do it, I’m so hard,” Tom murmured.

“You’ve only, got, uh, three fingers in there,” Bill said. He was beginning to sweat, what Tom was doing hurt, but it made Bill feel full, and he liked that. “You can’t just put it in there, you have to…”

Tom curled his fingers a bit and Bill felt something flutter in his stomach. This was too fast. He squeezed himself tight around Tom’s fingers, watching Tom’s mouth drop open. Bill made a soft, scared noise as his insides burned, and he turned over, forcing Tom’s fingers out.

“I can’t,” Bill groaned into the cushions.

Tom stared at Bill’s naked bottom and his own wet fingers. He took a deep breath. “This is going to be the best present ever.”

Bill looked over his shoulder and smiled, a light flush on his face. “Are you mad I made you stop?”

“Um.” Tom brushed his hand against his jeans, wincing. “I’m pretty hard.”

“I know,” Bill said. He smoothed a hand over the bulge in Tom’s jeans and made a clucking sound with his tongue. “Poor Tomi.”

Tom leaned back, inviting Bill to crawl onto his lap again. Bill sat on Tom’s thighs and hunched his shoulders over, taking Tom’s belt buckle in his fingers. Tom stared at him, eyebrows raised.

“What are you gonna do?” Tom watched Bill carefully.

“Make it not hard,” Bill replied, smiling. He slid down Tom’s legs, onto the floor, and placed his hands on Tom’s knees. “With my tongue.”

“Oh…” Tom glanced at the stairs. He heard movement above them, anyone could come down those stairs. “Bill, you don’t have-”

Bill shook his head, tugging on Tom’s jeans. “It’s my fault you’re hard.”

“Yeah,” Tom murmured, running a hand through Bill’s hair. “Yeah, it is.”

Bill was just getting Tom’s jeans down his thighs when the door to the basement creaked open. Bill fell back on his bare ass and Tom pulled his jeans up.

“Boys, dinner!” Simone called from the top of the steps. Bill was infinitely glad that she didn’t step forward, otherwise she would have seen them both. Bill scrambled to get his pants back on.

“Okay!” he yelled back, breathlessly.

Simone didn’t respond, but stayed at the top of the steps for a few moments. Bill tugged on his pants and looked at Tom, who also seemed to be a bit unnerved about their near miss.

“Now!” Simone called down the steps. Her voice seemed strained.

“We’re coming, geeze,” Tom said, standing and smoothing down his pants. He was still hard, so was Bill. They gave each other worried looks, Simone was still on the stairs, and she was moving forward.

“I said now.” They could see her feet and legs, knew that she could see them.

“Let’s go,” Bill mumbled. “Alright,” he called to his mother. He zipped up his pants as quietly as he could, and grinned at Tom. Tom gave a lopsided smile back. “That was too close,” Bill whispered.

“Boys.” Simone advanced, and Tom and Bill could see her face. Bill was sitting on the floor, and Tom was sprawled on the couch. “What have you been up to down here?”

“Talking,” Bill replied. “Messing around… with the music stuff.”

“Yeah,” added Tom.

Simone nodded slowly. “Okay… Go wash up for dinner, alright?”

Bill got up and bounded up the stairs, but Tom stayed seated. He was still very hard, and very embarrassed about getting up. Simone looked at him expectantly.

“Tom?”

“I’ll wait for Bill to finish up,” Tom said. “He takes forever in there.”

Simone nodded slowly. “Alright… What did your father have to say?”

Tom shrugged heavily. “The usual.”

“May I see?”

“Um.” Tom scooted forward, adjusting his clothes bulkily over his groin. He bent over and picked up the card from his dad and shuffled to the stairs. “Yeah.”

Simone took the card and looked it over. “Did he say the same to Bill?”

“I guess so.”

“Don’t you know?”

Tom sighed. “Ask Bill, I don’t know.”

He hurried up the stairs past Simone, brushing her shoulder as he rushed by. Simone glanced down at the card. It was Bill’s, not Tom’s. She looked up and bit her lip. Happy Christmas, it said, from Dad. Simone shook her head.

She dropped the card and went to prepare dinner.

**

Bill’s eyes opened wide and he finally got it.

He understood why Tom was so eager to have sex with him.

He opened his mouth and just barely muffled his scream into the pillow. He was on his hands and knees, ass up in the air, and Tom had four questing fingers inside of him. And those fingers were touching and pressing into something that made Bill lose his mind.

“Ugh!” His legs trembled and he thrust back against Tom.

Three days until Christmas, three days until Tom could really give it to him. His back was sweating and his belly ached painfully. Tom touched that spot again and he saw stars, white and flashing behind his closed lids.

“Please, please, please,” he was mumbling over and over. He thought he would either come or die. The pain from Tom’s fingers didn’t even register, not above the almost blinding panic of pleasure coursing through him. He was finished. “Fuck me!”

Tom’s fingers froze. “What?”

“Fuck…” Bill’s breathing was so ragged, so heavy. “Fuck me. You have to.”

“Bill,” Tom whispered. He pushed his fingers in, knuckles to Bill’s ass. “You mean it?”

Bill looked over his shoulder, eyes wide, hair matted to his forehead. “I need you to, I need it. Tomi, Tom, come on.” He pushed his ass back, bending Tom’s arm. “Tom?”

Tom’s cock twitched with need. Bill was begging him to fuck him. He was begging him to push his cock deep inside him. Begging. Tom almost fell over; he couldn’t believe it.

“You really want me to?” Tom pulled his fingers out slightly.

“I…” Bill groaned, pushing back so that Tom’s fingers were deep inside him again. “I need to feel you. I’ll make it so good, Tom. I promise.”

Tom closed his eyes. Three days. Three days until Christmas, three days until he could really fuck Bill. This wasn’t real.

“No,” Tom said. He pulled his fingers out and stroked Bill’s lower back. “No, we have to wait.”

“Look at you,” Bill said, a touch of panic to his voice. “Look at me. I’m so ready, Tom.”

“You weren’t ready a few weeks ago, when I wanted to,” Tom said, calmly.

“You… I…” Bill flipped over onto his back, his cock hard and wet. “Look at me.”

“I can see you,” Tom said. He moved over Bill and kissed him softly on the cheek. “It was good this time, wasn’t it?”

Bill turned his head, breathing heavily. “Yes.”

“I felt it, I touched something that felt good. A little spot. Your little spot.”

Bill moaned. “Touch it again.”

“It’ll feel so good when I’m in there,” Tom said. He loomed over Bill, his body pressing down. With one hand, he cradled Bill’s jaw, kissing him deeply, and with the other, he pushed his boxers down. He rubbed between Bill’s legs, his cock digging against Bill’s belly and thighs. “When I put it in you, it’ll go really deep, touch your little spot.”

Bill squeaked, arched up and kissed Tom hard. “Now. Tomi. It aches.”

“I can’t open my present early,” Tom said, though what he really wanted most in the world was to get in Bill as soon as possible, and to get into him hard. He imagined coming in Bill and thrust down hard, grinding into his brother and setting a quick, brutal pace. “This’ll have to do.”

Bill whined, but let Tom move over him. Soon they were both writhing together, lost for breath, clutching at the sheets, each other, anything.

“I want you to come in me, when we do it,” Bill moaned out. “Please.”

Tom gritted his teeth and came, right between Bill’s legs, painting his thighs and groin with his come. Bill twisted beneath him and Tom smoothed the come down to Bill’s hole and pressed two wet fingers inside.

“It’s in you,” he said, and crooked his fingers hard. Bill yelled and came instantly, flopping back, eyes wide.

“Fuck.” Tom wiped off Bill’s stomach and kicked the blankets down. “You gotta go.”

Bill’d been too loud, far too loud. Bill sat up, shaking. “Do I have to?”

Tom nodded. Their mother would be up the stairs in minutes, thinking Bill was having another one of his nightmares. She would find them crushed together, covered in come. She’d take Bill away from him.

Tom’s eyes went dark and he shoved Bill out of bed.

“Three days,” he said and Bill smiled, leaning down to peck him on the cheek.

“Three days.”

**

Tom plucked at Bill’s hair, grinning. They were sitting on the couch in the living room, and it was Christmas Eve.

“What is that?” Tom asked, tugging at some ribbon on Bill’s head.

“It’s a bow,” Bill replied, rolling his eyes. He had one of the sticky Christmas ribbons stuck on his head. He grinned. “I am a present.”

Tom groaned. “That’s so lame.”

“Fine, fine.” Bill took the bright bow off his head. “I guess I’m not a present, then.”

Tom made a face at Bill, and Simone came into the room. “Hey boys,” she said, smiling. “Bill, you look festive.”

“When do they all get here?” Bill asked, sticking the bow back on his head.

“Soon,” Simone said, looking tired. “Your grandparents should be here first. It’s such a long drive for them.”

Tom and Bill grunted.

“Set the table,” Simone told them. “You can sit around for the rest of the day. Oh, and Tom, make sure your guitar is nearby. I’m sure your aunts and uncles will want to know what you two have been up to, music wise.”

“Ew,” Bill whined. “I’m not singing.”

“You’ll sing,” Tom said, rolling his eyes. “You always do.”

Bill stuck his tongue out at Tom. “Whatever. Last one to the table has to kiss Grandma first.”

Tom bolted up and zoomed into the dining room. Bill wailed.

**

They were all there, the twins’ family. Well, all of their mother’s side, which wasn’t a very large group. Just their grandparents, and their mother’s brother, who brought along his wife and his two young children; a boy and a girl, ages five and seven.

Bill was already tired of their company. There were too many smiles, too many hugs, and too many of the same questions, the same comments. How’s school? Well, you and your brother sure have grown! My, you don’t even look alike anymore! How’s the band? How’s recording? Is that a tattoo?

And Bill was nervous, anxious, his palms had been sweating all day. In only a few short hours the family would be finished with dinner, finished with opening presents, and they’d drive into town and back to their hotel.

Then he could be alone with Tom. Then he could give him his gift. Just the thought made his stomach ache.

“The forks are on the wrong side,” their grandmother commented as they all sat down to eat dinner.

“Bill,” Simone said, chuckling.

“It was Tom,” Bill replied shortly. He added a grin onto the statement. He just wanted everyone to leave. Tom gazed at him from across the table and Bill blushed quickly.

“Well, whoever it was,” Gordon said, smiling and putting a massive roast in the middle of the table, “did a beautiful job. The table looks wonderful.”

“It was me,” Bill said.

Tom kicked him under the table. Bill shivered lightly in his chair and looked down at his plate.

“Wow, the weather is getting really bad,” their aunt said nervously. “Our hotel is pretty far away.”

Simone bit her lip. “It should be fine. We’ll finish up here soon, anyway.”

Bill kicked Tom back under the table, and Tom caught his foot between his legs. Bill took a sip from his glass to keep from laughing.

Tom’s foot slipped up Bill’s leg, his socked toes tickling Bill’s ankle. Bill dipped his head and the small red bow that had been caught up in his hair fell off onto the table, into his mashed potatoes.

Simone reached over picked up the bow, smiling. “Careful,” she said, handing it back to Bill. Bill stuck it back in his hair and flushed, feeling Tom’s foot travel higher. No one could see, but the foot traveled up between Bill’s legs and Bill let out a small squeak. Simone’s smile faded and she gave him a strange look.

Bill coughed and kicked Tom’s foot away. “The potatoes are good,” Bill said, shoving a forkful into this mouth.

Conversation picked up again and the dinner went smoothly. Simone was enjoying the meal and company, enjoying how proud everyone was of her boys and how they’d grown. But something was making her brows furrow. Something was making her stomach turn with unease.

It was the same feeling she’d gotten a few days ago when she’d left her boys alone in the basement. Something was up. She looked across the table at Bill, his face was flushed and his head was turned, eyes batting playfully at Tom who had just flicked a pea at him.

‘Nothing’s wrong,’ she told herself. ‘You’re just imagining things. It’s Christmas. Just stay pleasant.’

But Simone knew better. She’d always had these feelings about her sons, feelings she couldn’t quite place, feelings that came together and fell apart the day she caught them kissing. She wanted to believe that was a fluke, she hadn’t seen them do it again, but something told her it wasn’t over. The way Bill reached over and tugged on one of Tom’s dreads, his eyes sparkling, set alarms off in her head.

Bill was flirting with Tom.

She scolded herself for even thinking it. She felt like a bad mother for thinking it, but she also felt like a bad mother for not knowing if it was true. If it was true, what then?

Simone sighed and spread her hands out on the table, bumping a fork and knocking it to the floor. She bent down to pick it up, her eyes searching the floor, seeing Gordon’s feet, Bill’s feet, Tom’s…

Tom’s feet were wrapped around Bill’s legs, pressing up to his thighs and digging into his stomach. Simone grabbed her fork and bolted up, staring at her sons who were smiling behind mouthfuls of Christmas dinner.

“Tom,” she said, without thinking. “Go get some more napkins from the kitchen.”

Tom frowned. “There’s like a thousand of them on the table.”

“Just go,” Simone said.

Grumbling, Tom slid his chair out and shuffled into the kitchen. Simone watched Bill’s face carefully. Still flushed, Bill went back to eating his dinner, looking noticeably less animated than he had before. His eyes stayed on his plate.

“Listen to that wind,” Gordon said, wiping his mouth. “I wonder if the weather station has anything to say about it.”

“I hope not,” their grandfather said gruffly. “I don’t plan on driving in snow.”

Bill’s head snapped up. “It’s snowing?”

Gordon walked over to the stereo on the wall nearby and switched it onto the weather station. Everyone listened carefully as the announcer spoke.

“… with winds up to seventy miles per hour, there is a ninety percent chance of snow, a wintry mix. Road conditions will be bad, so if you are away from home, plan on staying there.”

“Oh no,” groused their grandmother. “This is terrible.”

Tom wandered back in, holding a stack of napkins. “What’s going on?”

“You’re all staying here,” Simone said firmly.

Bill dropped his fork; it clanged loudly on his plate. “They can’t,” Bill blurted out.

“Yes, it’s preposterous,” their grandmother said. She dabbed at her mouth with a napkin. “Where would we all stay in this tiny house?”

“You could take Tom’s room,” Simone said to their grandmother. “And Sebastian, you and Marie and the kids could take Bill’s.”

“But where would the boys stay?” Sebastian asked.

“On the pullout in the living room,” Gordon said. “I wouldn’t think of letting you all drive so far in this weather.”

“Bill could sleep on the couch in my studio,” Simone said, her voice tense.

Bill scowled from where he sat and Tom looked down at his food, not speaking.

“Nonsense, the pullout is big enough for the two of them,” Gordon said. “Besides, it’s freezing in your studio. It’s decided.”

Simone sighed, forcing a smile on her face. “Settled.”

Tom sat down, frowning. He and Bill locked eyes; their plans were ruined. “That pullout is itchy,” Bill whined.

“Bill,” Simone said sternly. “Sleep on the floor.”

Tom managed a laugh, and he kicked Bill under the table once more. Bill didn’t respond; he was disappointed. “This sucks,” Bill muttered.

Tom kicked him hard again and Bill just sighed, pulling the bow off his head and finishing the rest of his dinner.

**

Tom helped Gordon unfold the pullout couch in the living room, later that night. Bill sat perched on the arm of a chair, wearing his pajamas and a permanent frown.

“This’ll do,” Gordon said, securing the mattress into place. He brushed some dust off the metal bars underneath. “Whew, it’s been a while since we’ve pulled this out.”

“Yeah, when we made a fort,” Bill said sullenly.

“You two better not catch Santa in his act,” Gordon teased.

The twins groaned. “I’ll punch him,” Bill said.

Tom laughed. “He will.”

“I’d better not find blood out here in the morning,” Gordon said, tossing some blankets and pillows on the couch. “Are you sure you don’t want to leave your shoes outside your bedroom for Christmas treats?” he asked, waggling his eyebrows.

“Ugh,” Bill whined. “I’m not even in my bedroom. And I’m too old,” he added.

Tom just shrugged.

“Okay,” Gordon said, chuckling. “You’re no fun anymore. Night, boys. Happy Christmas.”

“Happy Christmas,” they chorused. Gordon shut the overhead light off as he left, and the only light was a small table lamp and the glowing Christmas tree lights.

Both boys sat on the pullout, not getting under the blankets, just staring down at the floor. The rest of the house was quiet, everyone was tucked into their beds, tucked into Bill and Tom’s beds. The fat little family Christmas tree twinkled in the corner of the room, all the presents underneath it unwrapped and scattered. Bill had gotten a lot of clothes and CDs, and a few pairs of knitted socks from his grandma. Tom had been gifted similarly.

“This Christmas sucks,” Bill finally said, pouting. He scooted closer to Tom, watching his parents’ door from across the living room and kitchen. The light flickered out underneath the door and Bill looked up at Tom.

Tom was frowning, tugging on his pajama sleeves. “Yeah, I’m not getting my present,” Tom said, crossing his arms.

Bill sighed. “Santa will bring your dumb guitar tomorrow, I saw it in Mom’s closet.”

“That’s not the present I meant,” Tom said.

Bill flushed and shook his head. “Oh, that.”

Tom caught Bill’s hand and squeezed it. “It’s the present I want most, fuck the guitar.”

“Maybe tomorrow.”

“Maybe tonight,” Tom replied, pulling Bill closer. “What do you think?”

Bill frowned. “I think you’re an idiot. Mom’s right there.”

“Door’s closed,” Tom said. “We could be really quiet.”

“That’s not how I wanted to… to give you it,” Bill murmured, kissing Tom’s neck. “It has to be special.”

“Don’t be a girl.” Tom grinned. “It’ll be good.”

Bill looked toward their parents’ room nervously. “I know.”

“Come on, you’ve been driving me crazy all day.” Bill shivered a little at Tom’s words. “We’re ready.”

“I know,” Bill said again, softer this time. “You think we could?”

“I know I could,” Tom said confidently. “I guess it’s up to you.”

Bill smiled against Tom’s shoulder. “You know I want to.”

The both crawled forward, closer, and Bill reached over Tom’s shoulder and flicked the lamp off, the room completely dark except for the dim light coming from the Christmas tree. Their lips met and Tom pushed Bill to his back.

“What if Grandma comes down for like… a glass of milk and sees us?” Bill whispered, shivering as Tom kissed his neck in soft, wet pecks.

“She can’t see a foot in front of her own face,” Tom said. “Bill, I’ve been waiting for so long.”

Bill smiled and wrapped his arms around Tom’s back. “You’ve been a really good boy, too.”

“I have! I deserve this gift.”

Bill nudged Tom’s mouth with his own and kissed him gently. The wind howled outside, snow whipping against the windows. The room was cold and Bill tugged the blankets over them. “We can’t just yet, it isn’t Christmas until midnight.”

It was ten. “Santa isn’t bringing this gift,” Tom said. He pressed his body down against Bill’s. “Let me have it now. I’ll be so quiet and good. I will.”

“You’ve waited this long, you can wait a few more hours.” Tom tried to persuade Bill otherwise with his mouth and hands. His mouth working a hot trail down Bill’s neck, his hands slipping underneath Bill’s flannel pajama bottoms.

“I won’t make a sound when I do it,” Tom whispered. “I’ll put my fingers in first, I’ll rub against you just how you like, I’ll make you come, Bill.”

Bill moaned softly; Tom’s fingers were very convincing, stroking his upper thigh. “No,” he whispered. “Tomi, stop.”

“It’s called foreplay.”

“Yeah, stop,” Bill pleaded, eyes wide. “I want to wait for midnight, you aren’t helping.”

“Good.” Tom tickled the base of Bill’s cock and Bill hissed through his teeth. “You looked so good all day.”

“With my dumb bow on my head?” Bill pulled his face away from Tom’s and bit his lip. He wouldn’t give in. He wouldn’t. He couldn’t. “I can’t,” Bill mumbled.

Tom took his hand out of Bill’s pants and sat back. “What are we going to do for two hours?”

Bill shrugged slowly. “Watch Christmas stuff on TV?”

Tom groaned loudly, and Bill shushed him. “You’re going to let me, right?” Tom asked him seriously.

“Tomi,” Bill said, frowning. “Of course. I want to.”

“Let’s work on some music,” Tom said, reaching over to grab his old guitar off the floor. “Unless you’re all music’d out from singing those Christmas carols. God, I told you you’d sing.”

Bill made a face. “It’s what I do.”

“I wish I had my new guitar.”

“You have me.” Bill grinned.

“Not till midnight.”

Bill wrinkled his nose. “I feel like it’s… like a train schedule.”

“It better be on time,” Tom said, ducking his head down.

Bill’s body trembled slightly, his nervousness was starting to mingle with excitement. “Okay, music stuff.”

They smiled at each other and Tom played the first few quiet notes.

**

A few soft notes drifted into the room and Simone couldn’t sleep. She rolled to her side and then almost immediately flipped to her back.

“Can’t sleep?” Gordon asked, yawning.

“No,” she said. “Too much excitement today.”

“It all worked out. The boys are settled in the living room… Sounds like they’re working on something. I hope Tom likes his guitar,” Gordon said.

“He will,” Simone said softly. “Gordon…”

“Hm?”

“Do you… Have you ever…?” Simone trailed off. She couldn’t think of a way to phrase it, she didn’t know if she even wanted to say anything to her husband about her suspicions about the twins. It was something she’d carried for so long. “Never mind.”

“What’s the matter?” Gordon sat up. “Is it the boys?”

“No, it’s nothing,” Simone told him. “Go to sleep.”

Gordon rolled over and soon, Simone heard his light snore.

She lay awake until the soft guitar twanging stopped, and then she closed her eyes, trying to shut out the thoughts invading her mind.

**

Tom set his guitar down and glanced at the clock. It was ten minutes to midnight. Bill was humming a little tune.

“Shh, Bill,” Tom whispered.

“Hmm?” Bill blinked. “I thought we had something there.”

“We did.” Tom pointed to the clock.

“Oh.” Bill’s face flushed bright red.

“I want to touch you now,” Tom said.

Bill groaned softly. “How?”

Tom crawled on top of Bill, forcing him down to the mattress. “Inside you.”

Bill squirmed out from under Tom, putting a hand to Tom’s shocked mouth. “I want it, too. I just need to… get something.”

“What?”

Bill hopped off the bed and grabbed the small duffle bag he’d brought down from his room. He dug out a small bottle of lotion and timidly held it out to Tom. “We’ll need this, for… you know.”

Tom looked confused. “For…” And then his eyes widened. “Oh.”

“Yeah, otherwise it’ll hurt,” Bill said. “I mean, it’s going to hurt.”

“I’m going to make it not hurt,” Tom said, his voice half confident and half unsure. “I’m going to make it feel good.”

“I know you will,” Bill said slowly. “I hope.”

“It will,” Tom said firmly. “I mean, I will. What are we talking about?”

Bill laughed nervously. “That, um, it won’t hurt. When you… do it.”

“Oh.” Tom let out a low breath. “Fuck, I don’t know.”

Bill nodded and crawled over to Tom, clutching the bottle. “Tom…”

“What?”

“That clock is slow… It’s probably been Christmas for a few minutes now.”

Tom smiled slowly. “You’re late.”

“Oh god, I don’t know,” Bill said, his eyes flashing with panic. “I don’t know if I can do this.”

“Bill…” Tom trailed off, frowning. He didn’t want to force Bill. He got an idea. “Alright, I guess I can’t, either.”

“Tom?”

“Good night, Bill.”

Bill touched Tom’s shoulder. “I’m not falling for it.”

Tom let out a loud, obviously fake snore.

“Tomi!” Bill hissed. He crawled onto Tom, forcing him to his back. Tom kept his eyes closed and continued to snore. “You can’t give a gift back.” Bill straddled Tom’s hips and pulled his own pajama top over his head, exposing his chest. He tossed the shirt to the floor. “I’ll just have to unwrap it for you.”

At that, Tom’s eyes flashed open. “You can’t open my present, Bill. That’s not nice.” He toppled Bill over and they were a tangle of writhing limbs at the foot of the foldout bed. They play fought a bit, Bill trying to tear his own pants off, and Tom cussing him out and pulling the pants back up.

“Stop it,” Tom said, finally getting the upper hand and pinning Bill down. Bill’s pants were half down his thighs, his naked hips and groin exposed. Bill wasn’t wearing anything under his pajamas. “Bill,” Tom breathed. He pulled Bill’s pants up and patted Bill’s cock gently through the pants. “Behave.”

Bill nodded, hot all over from wrestling with his brother. “Take them off.”

“I want to take my time unwrapping you,” Tom said, his voice very soft, very kind.

“We don’t have time,” Bill whispered.

“I’ve got all day,” Tom murmured, running a hand down Bill’s stomach. “Are you ready?”

Bill nodded.

“How ready?”

“Um…” Bill glanced up at Tom and shook a little. “I don’t know how ready,” he admitted. “But I want to do this.”

Tom kissed his neck and moved down Bill’s body, brushing his lips in every contour, relishing every inch. He’d explored Bill’s body before but tonight was different. So very different.

“Bill, oh,” Tom said, licking along the curve of Bill’s hip. “You look so good.”

“You can’t see me,” Bill said quietly.

“I can,” Tom replied, sliding his fingers underneath the waist of Bill’s soft pants. “I can’t wait to get inside you.”

“Tomi,” was all Bill could say as Tom slid his pants down his thighs, and then tugged them off. The chill in the air surrounded Bill and he trembled slightly, pulling Tom over him and burying his face in his brother’s neck. They would be one soon, the thought made Bill ache.

Tom licked down Bill’s hot thigh and sucked, causing Bill to moan, not so softly. Tom looked up and shushed him, and Bill just shrugged helplessly.

“You do this to me, I can’t promise I’ll be quiet,” Bill said. “You… oh, Tomi.”

Tom nodded. His nose bumped Bill’s cock. He wanted to grind against him, come the old way.

Tom sat up and pulled his shirt off, covering Bill’s body with his own. He thrust down once, his clothed erection throbbing. He could easily tug his pants off and come all over Bill’s stomach, all over his thighs. A part of him was deeply aroused by the idea.

But then Bill was pushing his pants down, his hands slick with the lotion, running hotly over Tom’s cock, and Tom wanted nothing more than to be inside Bill.

Tom kicked his pants off and thrust into Bill’s hold. “Fuck,” he moaned, and immediately bit his lip. “We’ve gotta… oh fuck, Bill… we’ve gotta be quiet.”

“We can’t tell Mom,” Bill said, stroking Tom harder. “We can’t tell Mom that you put it in me.”

“Duh,” Tom groaned out. He shook and batted Bill’s hands away. “Give me that lotion.” Bill did and Tom poured a generous amount into his palm, feeling how wet and slick it was. “I’m gonna be careful, but God, Bill… I want to just put it in.”

“You can’t,” Bill said.

Tom’s finger bumped Bill’s entrance, immediately pressing in. He didn’t go deep, but Bill mewled anyway, his back arching. “Do you like having my finger in there?”

“I… I do,” Bill managed to get out. “It sort of… you know, it’s my ass Tom.” Bill flushed and covered his face. “Deeper, it aches down there.”

“Where?” Tom pushed his finger in further, scratching Bill’s ache. “Tell me where. Where’s your little spot?”

“In there,” Bill whined weakly, “find it.”

“Shh,” Tom said, stroking Bill’s shoulder. “Stay still.”

“Can’t.” Bill’s body jerked fast, his legs vibrated. “God… I can’t. You can’t. Oh, my god. Are you adding another finger?”

“Does that feel good?” Tom asked softly.

“I don’t know,” Bill said. “I don’t know. Right now it feels like a finger in my butt.”

Tom laughed. “That’s… not… good?” He pulled his fingers out, and Bill protested.

“Keep going,” Bill urged. “I like your finger… in there. Up there. I don’t know.”

Pushing his two fingers back inside Bill, Tom winced. “You’re so tight tonight.”

“I’m nervous,” Bill squeaked. “God, so nervous… Don’t hurt me, Tom.”

“I’ll try not to,” Tom said. “I’ll be careful.”

“You break all your other presents,” Bill said, smiling a little.

Tom laughed and then covered his mouth with his free hand. “I won’t break you and I won’t break my guitar.” His fingers pushed impossibly deeper and then crooked. “Especially not my guitar.”

Bill could barely muffle the near scream that erupted from his mouth as Tom touched him there.

Tom’s eyes widened as Bill’s body jerked and tightened around him. He pulled his fingers out, watching Bill shake. “Oh my god, Bill… what did I do? Are you okay?” Tom whispered frantically, stroking Bill’s now sweaty form, trying to soothe him. “Are you hurt?”

Bill could hardly breathe. “Tom… that…” He spread his legs and groaned. “Felt so freakin’ good.”

Tom’s eye widened. “It felt good?”

Bill nodded. “Yeah, yeah, that was my spot.” Tom tried putting his fingers back inside, but Bill squirmed away. “No, just put your… dick in. I’ll scream if you touch it with your fingers.”

“Don’t scream,” Tom whispered. “Don’t even make a noise.”

Bill shook his head, his soft dark curls matting to his forehead. “I just… need you to do it.”

He spread his legs as wide as he could and locked them around Tom’s waist, pulling him close. He felt Tom’s cock nudge between his legs. He felt it bump his hole, and he moaned softly. Tom put a hand over Bill’s mouth and kissed his nose. Bill mumbled something through Tom’s fingers.

“What?” Tom asked quietly.

“I love you,” Bill said clearly, blinking nervously. “I do, oh… Please, just do it.”

Tom took Bill’s hand and kissed his knuckles. “We’re doing this. Real sex.”

“Fuck me,” Bill said, surprising them both. Tom let out a short laugh and kissed Bill’s face wetly.

“Okay,” Tom said. He leaned back on his knees and took Bill’s legs in his hands and squeezed. “I’m just gonna…fuck you now.”

Bill widened his eyes and took a deep breath. “Say it.”

Tom looked at Bill inquisitively.

“This is big,” Bill said softly. “I’m… giving you, you know. Say… it.”

Tom brushed their bellies together and grinded softly against Bill, nuzzling his face. “Love you, love you,” he said against Bill’s skin.

Bill moaned and pressed a hand, suddenly slick with lotion, against Tom’s cock. He stroked Tom twice and Tom thrust into the hold, gaping down at Bill’s long, naked body. Bill let go of Tom’s erection and lay back completely, stretching his body out, his hands over his head.

“Happy Christmas,” he said.

Tom ducked his head down and kissed Bill’s lips, his hips pressing forward, his cock testing the resistance of Bill’s little body.

Bill’s eyes widened and Tom could feel the heat as the head of his erection sunk inside. “Oh shit,” he hissed. He was sliding in and Bill was tense and still beneath him. “Bill, I’m almost… I’m in you. I’m… oh fuck, Bill, you’re… so tight.”

He couldn’t pay attention to the pain on Bill’s face or the way Bill’s breath was stuttering out of him. All he could think of was how he was finally in Bill, of how fucking good it felt. Almost too good and he wasn’t even all the way in there yet.

Bill was trying not to cry out, trying not to shove Tom off him and curl into a ball. He was being ripped in half, his entire body was cramping up. He could only whimper, only lie back and take all of Tom’s cock.

Because even though it hurt like nothing had ever hurt before, he couldn’t back out now. He’d teased Tom and promised Tom and now Tom was fucking him.

“Oh, god,” Bill whimpered softly, under his breath. He saw stars, not the good kind. His vision was filled with floating sparkles, and as he blinked through the pain, he bit down on his lip powerfully. His teeth almost pierced his wet lips, his teeth were gritting so hard. “Tom…”

“Fuck,” Tom hissed, dropping his head down, forehead pressed to Bill’s chest. “Bill, I’m… I’m, shit, oh… Shit… I’m…”

Bill looked away, focusing on the dim Christmas tree, so carefully decorated. His mind wandered. If this was sex, he didn’t want it ever again.

Meanwhile, Tom was thinking that sex was the best thing ever. His cock was deep in Bill, dragging back and forth in rough, unpracticed movements. His eyes were closed, so tight. He wanted to look at Bill but this was his moment, he’d been waiting so long and finally, it was everything he’d thought it would be. Sex with Bill… Fucking Bill was amazing.

“Amazing,” Tom breathed, holding himself up over Bill. He gave another sloppy thrust and felt his knees shake. “Oh, no…”

It was too much, too intense. He backed up and came, his cock sliding out of Bill in jerking movements. He leaned back on his knees and clenched his fists together as he came hard, against his thighs, against Bill’s thighs. His cock felt like it never had before. Something had changed inside him. He felt really good.

When he opened his eyes he wasn’t prepared for what he saw. Bill looked limp and broken, leaning on his elbows and panting heavily. He had a hand over his ass and his face was twisted in pain.

“Bill,” Tom said, hurrying up to Bill. “Bill, are you okay?? Bill?”

Bill croaked out a broken, “F…fuck, Tomi.”

Tom pulled Bill’s hands away from himself and noticed there was a bit of blood on Bill’s thighs. “Oh Jesus, are you okay?” The blood made his stomach turn, but Bill nodded, he was okay.

“Don’t… freak out,” Bill said, trying to catch his breath. “Don’t freak out. Fuck, Tomi, I don’t know if… we can do that again.”

Tom’s heart dropped. “Did I break you? I promised I wouldn’t but it felt…”

“You sounded really good,” Bill said, still breathing heavily. “I’m glad you did. I am. I just.” Tears welled up in Bill’s eyes. “Is it supposed to hurt that bad?”

Tom gathered Bill in his arms, careful not to drag him around too much, and kissed him softly on the lips. “It was your first time. You… never want to do it again?”

Bill wiped at his tears, feeling stupid. Of course it was rough the first time. “Did you really like it? Because if you did, I want to try it again. Um, sometime.”

Tom shook his head. “I don’t want to do it just because I like it.”

“But it was good?” Bill’s eyes were pleading. “Did I feel good?” Bill needed it to be good for Tom. His body was still burning, his insides felt twisted, rubbed raw. When would the pain go away? He grabbed Tom’s hands. “Was I good?”

Tom didn’t know how to express to Bill how good he was. He’d never come that hard before. He’d never been so lost in an orgasm. “It was the best moment of my life,” Tom said seriously. “You’re so hot and I love you.”

“Then,” Bill said, “it’s worth doing it again. I want to try again. But next time, Tomi, I want you to… you know… get it in me.” He kissed Tom’s lips and winced, his bottom was so very sore. “Ow… I think I need to clean up or something.”

“I’ll help,” Tom whispered.

Suddenly, a soft light poured in the room. “Mom,” Bill murmured.

Tom nodded and pulled the blankets up over them, and they rolled to opposite sides of the bed.

Simone had been troubled all night. She hadn’t slept, she’d tried everything she could think of to fall asleep. She decided that it couldn’t hurt to get up and have a drink of water.

As she walked by the living room, she poked her head in. There on the sofa, under a mountain of blankets, were her two boys. They were fast asleep. Simone turned the heat up a few degrees. It was chilly in the room, and they had the blankets nearly up past their faces.

She was about to leave the room when she spotted something on the floor.

Bill’s pajama pants.

Don't Tell Mom (5/?)

Wed, 31 Oct 2007 05:03:30 GMT

Title: Don't Tell Mom (5/?)
Previous Chapters: Here
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17 (eventually)
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: What Mom doesn't know won't kill her.

Bill arched his back as Tom licked down his neck. Tom tasted sweat and licked his lips, pressing his mouth flush against the hot skin. Bill mewled, kicking his legs and going rigid under his brother. His fingers dug into Tom’s back and gripped, and Tom groaned.

“Sorry,” Bill breathed, closing his eyes and burying his face in Tom’s chest. “Sorry, sorry, oh, god.”

Tom shook his head and breathed out, hot air hitting the top of Bill’s head. “Don’t,” Tom murmured. He pulled Bill forward, onto his lap, and kneaded the flesh on Bill’s back. “That feel good?”

“Mm,” was all Bill could manage. Their cocks were sliding together and Bill opened his thighs, feeling cool air against his balls. “Oh…”

Tom thrust up, right between Bill’s legs, his cock slipping down to press against Bill’s entrance. Bill squealed and shook in Tom’s arms and Tom did it again.

“Oh, no, Tomi,” Bill sighed. “Not… ugh… there.”

Tom smiled and did it again; Bill cried out in obvious delight. “Fuck, I can feel how hot your are,” Tom groaned out. “Inside.”

“Fuck, fuck.” Bill wriggled on Tom’s lap and just let Tom tease his entrance. Tom’s cock was hot, hard, and wet, and it bumped up against Bill over and over again. Bill thought that it could probably slide inside real easily.

“Gonna get in there someday,” Tom said. He kissed Bill’s neck and thrust hard enough to make them both cry out a bit too loudly. Tom forced their mouths together and toppled Bill over to his back. “Shhh…”

“Tomi,” Bill whimpered, over and over. “Tomi, Tomi…”

Tom stroked down Bill’s thighs and pressed his thumb behind Bill’s balls. Bill tensed his legs and squeezed them around Tom, and Tom groaned. Bill was acting like sex, real sex. Not movie sex. Tom stared at him and made a frustrated sound. “Bill,” he whispered.

“Yes.” Bill relaxed his neck and laid his head on the mattress heavily. “Yes.”

“Let’s just…” Tom touched between the crease of Bill’s ass and stroked softly. “Let’s just do it.”

Bill looked up, wide eyed. “You want to? Do it??” He squirmed, moving his bottom away from Tom’s finger. “Don’t touch there, it’s…”

“So hot,” Tom finished, holding his palm centimeters away from Bill’s entrance. “Bill, come on, it’s right. I love you, I want to touch inside you.”

Bill squeaked. “How do you know it’s not so gross?”

“I don’t,” Tom said honestly. “But it looks good.”

“Looks??” Bill blushed hotly, his ears burning.

“Yeah.” Tom tapped gently against Bill’s entrance. “I can see everything.”

Bill shivered and tried moving away, but Tom grabbed hold of his thighs and held him to the bed.

“Bill, don’t you wanna?” Tom’s finger nudged forward, just barely breaching Bill’s body. “Does it hurt?”

It didn’t hurt. Bill’s cock ached and his mind was reeling. Maybe Tom could just put it in there, maybe it wouldn’t be a big deal. Bill cringed as Tom’s finger pressed in a little deeper and he scooted away.

He wanted it to be a big deal.

“No, Tomi. I can’t,” Bill said, frowning. “I’m sorry.”

Tom sighed, but Bill knew he wasn’t mad. “I’m sorry, I just..”

Bill touched Tom’s cheek. “I know,” Bill said. “I want more, too. Tomi, you make me all sweaty and achy and it won’t go away.”

Tom moved over Bill, pushing their bodies together again. “You make it so hard,” Tom said, thrusting down against Bill. “And I go all crazy.”

Bill smiled, feeling the pleasure wash over him as Tom moved slowly. “You do get all crazy.” Tom laughed and thrust harder. “Ungh. You hold me down and… oh!”

Tom had just rubbed his cock against Bill’s hot entrance, and Bill squirmed around in delight. Tom pinned Bill’s wrists over his head on the mattress and grinded against him, his cock starting to become moist. They locked eyes and breathed against each other, into each other’s mouths, licking at one another’s lips. Bill’s body shook and he gripped onto Tom tightly, his legs going rigid as his release came rapidly against Tom’s stomach. Tom moaned and dug his erection in between Bill’s thighs, thrusting desperately as Bill lay raggedly under him. Bill lazily caressed Tom’s cock between his legs and Tom jerked forward, hissing through his teeth. He came against Bill’s hole and dragged his cock up and down the crease, smearing the warm liquid in Bill’s most private area.

They held onto each other, panting and sighing. Bill pushed the hair from Tom’s face and kissed his lips sweetly, licking at the skin between his mouth and nose. Tom pushed his hand down between them and gathered some of Bill’s come on his finger, and traced along Bill’s hip.

“Okay,” Bill said, groaning. “Okay, okay, we need to… stop.”

Tom sat up, dragging his fingers down Bill’s torso. “Why?”

“Because… If you keep that up, I’ll… eat you,” Bill replied, managing a grin. “Tom…”

Tom groaned and slid off Bill, sitting cross legged on the bed. “It’d be so good.”

“You don’t know that.” Bill touched Tom’s shoulder lightly. “You don’t know anything.”

“Mm,” Tom hummed. “Someday, though. Right?”

“I think even people in the movies eventually end up having real sex.”

Tom grinned and laid himself down, stretching his limbs out. “Yeah… You never hear about it, though.”

Bill curled up against Tom and rubbed his brother’s belly. “You want to have sex with me really bad?”

Tom nodded.

“I like that,” Bill said. “I like that a lot.”

Tom sighed and pulled Bill closer. “Yeah, me too.”

Bill watched Tom yawn, and Tom’s eyes started to close. Bill was tired, too, but his mind was racing. He was hot all over, burning in his belly. He had an ache, and he knew what the solution was. Kissing wasn’t enough, rubbing wasn’t enough. All the things they did… it wasn’t enough.

Bill settled onto his back and listened to Tom start to snore lightly. “Night, Tomi,” he whispered. He didn’t get an answer, he just closed his own eyes and waited for sleep to wash over him.

**

Bill sat at the table, staring at his half empty bowl of Cheerios. He was exhausted, Tom and he had stayed up all night with Andreas watching scary movies. It was their own little Halloween party. They hadn’t been invited anywhere else. Even Georg and Gustav had plans that didn’t involve them.

But they’d had a fun time, had a real adult party. Simone and Gordon left them alone for the night and let them order pizza and whatever they wanted. Andreas smuggled some beer in from his dad and they’d watched the sort of movies their parents wouldn’t have wanted them to watch. They didn’t go trick or treating and they didn’t dress up. They were adults.

Bill thought that over and over as he swirled his Cheerios around in his bowl. “I’m an adult,” he mumbled.

And then he smiled. Tom took that moment to walk into the kitchen, scratching his chest and yawning.

Bill’s smile widened to a grin.

**

It was one of those nights.

Bill couldn’t sleep. Tom couldn’t sleep. They were sitting on Tom’s bed, facing each other and playing cards. It was going on two in the morning, and neither twin had even so much as yawned.

“Go fish,” Tom said, bored, tossing a card into a sloppy pile between them.

“That’s not how you play,” Bill said.

Tom shrugged. “It’s how I play.”

Bill smiled. “I like how you play.”

Tom looked up, a small smirk on his lips. “Yeah?”

Bill rolled his eyes, putting his hand of cards down. “This is boring.”

“You’re boring.”

“Ha, ha.” Bill made a face and glanced at the clock. “Maybe we can sneak down and watch some TV.”

“Doubt it.”

Bill gathered all the cards into a pile and put them on the table beside the bed. “Don’t be mean.”

Tom lay down on the bed and put his hands behind his head. “Come here.”

Bill smiled, reaching over to turn off the small lamp, and scooted close to Tom. The room darkened and the boys could just make out each other’s faces in the moonlight. “Why?”

Tom laughed. “I’m not going to do anything, promise.”

“That sucks,” Bill said. They exchanged smiles and Bill lay down next to Tom, curling into him. “You smell.”

“I do not!”

Bill poked Tom in the ribs. “You do, you smell good. Mmm.” Bill nuzzled into Tom’s neck.

“Yeah?”

Bill pressed a soft kiss just behind Tom’s ear. “Yeah.” He opened his mouth and the kiss became wet and hot. “Tomi, I’m… getting you something for Christmas.”

Tom stiffened. “What? We never do that! And I didn’t get you anything!”

Bill squeezed Tom’s hand. “I know we don’t buy each other stuff, ever, but this is just… too perfect.”

“No way,” Tom said, making a face. “You’re full of shit. It’s probably like… something stupid.”

“Maybe I’ll keep it then.” Bill frowned and rolled away from Tom.

“No, I want it,” Tom insisted. “Even if it’s stupid.”

“You’re being mean again.”

Tom grinned and lifted Bill’s shirt up, tugging it over his head. He pressed his face into Bill’s back and kissed between his shoulder blades. “Tell me.”

“You don’t want to know, trust me.”

“I do,” Tom said. He bit down gently on Bill’s shoulder. “Is it music?”

“It’s… yeah, sort of,” Bill said, looking over his shoulder. “I know you want it really bad.”

Tom thought it over in his head. “Is it a CD or something?”

Bill laughed. “It’s no big deal, just forget it.”

“What if I buy it for myself? Christmas is like two months away.” Tom poked Bill’s shoulder.

“You won’t,” Bill said softly. “Don’t worry about it.”

“Give me a hint,” Tom whined.

“No, because then you’ll guess,” Bill said. “And then it won’t be as special.”

“Oh, come on, I’m bored.” Tom licked a hot stripe up Bill’s back and Bill gasped. “Can I eat it?”

Bill snorted. “Yes.”

“I can?”

“Sort of.”

“Either yes or no,” Tom said. He pressed his hand flat against Bill’s back, smoothing it down. “Give me a hint and I’ll… do whatever you want.”

Bill flushed, turning quickly to look at Tom. “Anything?”

Tom nodded. “Is it bigger than a shoebox?”

“Yeah.”

“Bill,” Tom said, tugging at Bill’s pants. “Tell me something.”

Bill shivered as Tom’s fingers brushed down his lower back and then cupped his ass. “You’ve had your eye on it for a long while.”

“Oh.” Tom managed to remove Bill’s pants, and then Bill was naked before him. He touched just below the curve of Bill’s belly and Bill purred against him. “One more hint.”

“It’s…” Bill spread his legs and invited Tom’s hand to his thighs. “You’ll like it.” He smiled.

“I like a lot of things,” Tom murmured, lowering himself on Bill. Bill groaned and grabbed at Tom’s pajama bottoms, pulling them down. He palmed Tom’s ass and squeezed, and Tom grunted.

“You’ll love this.”

Their lips met and their game was over.

**

“Do I know anyone else who has it?” Tom asked. “Like, Andreas’ Playstation?”

Bill rolled his eyes. They were walking home from school in the bitter cold, their breaths puffing out before them. “No, it’s a one of a kind sort of thing.”

“I have no freakin’ idea,” Tom said. “Seriously. I don’t want anything for Christmas, besides a new guitar.”

Bill turned, walking backward and tugging at Tom’s scarf, dragging him along. “Trust me, Tomi, it’ll be better than a guitar.”

Now Tom rolled his eyes. “Doubt it!”

Bill stuck out his tongue and tugged Tom right up to him. He licked at the tip of Tom’s nose. “We’ll see.”

**

“Pass the peas,” Bill said, glancing at Simone. “Please.”

Simone smiled and handed the bowl of peas over the rest of their dinner, and Bill took it hungrily. As he let some peas spill onto his plate, Tom watched him carefully.

“What color is it?” Tom asked, kicking Bill under the dinner table. “The thing.”

“What thing?” Simone put her fork down.

“Just a dumb present Bill said he got for me,” Tom said. “For Christmas.”

“You’ll be pleased this Christmas, Tom,” Gordon said, wiping his mouth and grinning. “Your mother and I think so.”

Bill pouted. “What about me?”

“What do you want, sweetheart?” Simone asked.

Bill shrugged. “Fame.”

Tom snorted. “Good luck. Come on, what color is it?”

“Don’t you wanna know about the dumb guitar Mom and Gordon are getting for you?”

“Bill!” Simone and Gordon said loudly.

“Sorry,” Bill mumbled.

“Fuck, that’s so cool,” Tom said excitedly. “Can I have it now?? I could use it. Really? Are you really getting one? What kind is it?”

Gordon frowned. “No more about this, please.” He glared at Bill for a moment.

Bill rolled his eyes. “It’s not any one color, Tom. It’s a little more complicated than that.”

Tom sat back in his chair and ate a forkful of potatoes. “How many days till Christmas?”

**

Bill licked up the length of Tom’s cock, very slowly and then sucked the tip in. Tom groaned and tried thrusting up, but Bill popped his mouth off. “It’s better than this,” Bill said, voice raspy.

Tom was out of it, his cock aching for release. “Huh?”

“The present,” Bill said. He pressed his tongue against the slit and Tom had to muffle his cry.

“No way,” Tom said, “No fucking way.”

Bill just smiled and sucked Tom back in. Tom couldn’t imagine anything Bill could buy him that would be better than a blowjob. Actually, at the moment Tom couldn’t imagine anything.

All he could do was swear and come down Bill’s throat, his hands smoothing through Bill’s hair weakly.

**

“Shut up,” Tom said, laughing. “You’re just making shit up now.”

They were curled together on the couch, alone for the night, watching some dumb made for TV movie.

“I’m serious, it can talk,” Bill said. He was tired of Tom asking him for hints, he almost just wanted to tell him already, get it over with.

Tom sighed and put one leg over Bill, and let his other leg hang off the couch. “What does it say?”

“Whatever the fuck it wants.” Bill smiled.

“Really.”

“Yeah.”

Tom let out a long breath. “You have to tell me. It’s driving me up the fucking wall.”

“Interesting, because if you knew what the present was,” Bill said, “it would have the same effect.”

“Argh,” Tom grumbled. “You’re such a tease.”

“I’m not.”

Tom rolled his eyes. “One more hint. I won’t ask again. And make it good.”

Bill pulled away from Tom and stared at him. “When I give you this… you’ll be giving me something, too.”

“What?” Tom’s mouth dropped open. “Alright, that’s fucked up. I have no idea. There’s no present, is there? You’re messing with me.”

“No,” Bill said quietly. “That was the best hint I could give you.”

Tom sat back and nodded. “Alright… I have no idea, so I guess I’ll just wait.”

A few minutes passed, and the twins blankly watched the TV. Bill snuggled up next to Tom and sighed, burying his face in his neck. His belly was swirling with the desire to tell his brother everything. He was almost bursting. “Tom…”

“Hm?” Tom was stroking Bill’s forearm gently.

“Um…” Bill’s face became hot, more flushed than he’d ever been before. Tom watched him curiously. “Um.”

“What?”

“On Christmas.” Bill glanced up quickly at Tom. “I’m gonna let you have sex with me. That’s it.”

Tom’s mouth dropped open. “Movie sex or real sex?”

Bill hid behind his hands, suddenly feeling so very vulnerable. “Real.”

“Really?” Tom’s hands move to Bill’s shoulders, clutching them hard. “For real?”

Bill nodded. “I want you to do it to me, Tomi. You know, in me.” Tom’s eyes darkened, and for a moment Bill thought Tom was mad. But then their lips crashed together and Bill found himself on his back against the couch, Tom’s hands and lips everywhere.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Tom moaned, all over Bill. His hands rubbed up and down Bill’s body, tugging at the zipper of Bill’s pants. “Shouldn’t have told me. I can’t… I’m going to go crazy waiting.”

“I didn’t want to, but you kept asking!” Bill squeaked as Tom ripped his pants and boxers down, his hands immediately going to Bill’s ass.

“Let me… touch it,” Tom said. “Let me just a little.”

“No!” Bill protested. “No, it’s for Christmas.”

“Fuck Christmas,” Tom replied, thumbing the rosy skin on Bill’s ass. “I just want to touch it, Bill, please.”

“That’s like peeking.” Bill bit his lip. “And I didn’t shower today.”

Tom groaned and pulled Bill into his lap. Bill straddled him shyly, looking away. “I don’t care, Bill. I don’t think you’re gross. Nothing you could do would gross me out. I love you, let me touch you.”

“I love you.” Bill kissed the corner of Tom’s mouth. “Maybe… I don’t know.”

“You’ve gotta be dying to know what it feels like.”

Bill did, he certainly did. “Okay… Just a little. It’s like shaking the wrapped present to guess what’s inside.”

Tom laughed and slid his fingers down Bill’s ass. “What’s inside, Bill?” His finger nudged inside, just the smallest bit. Bill stiffened and then let out a long sigh.

“I don’t know,” he said. “That feels… weird.”

Tom removed his finger and brought it to his mouth, sucking it in.

Bill’s eyes went wide. “Tom!”

“Gotta get it wet,” Tom said. He brought his finger back down to Bill’s ass and slipped it in to the first knuckle. Bill cried out, his insides aching, his cock hardening rapidly.

“Oh god, what’s it going to feel like with your… you know, in there?”

Tom pressed his finger in deeper. “My dick, Bill.”

Bill hid his face in Tom’s neck. “Yeah, your dick.”

“How’s that?” Tom scraped his finger inside clumsily and Bill cringed.

“It’s…” Bill closed his eyes and held his breath. “Oh, wow.”

“What?”

“I’ve never felt that before.”

Tom pulled his finger out and stared at it. “Yeah, it’s so small.”

“I don’t know if your… dick… will fit me.” Bill frowned.

“It has to,” Tom said quietly. “It has to, we’re twins.”

“Don’t freak out, I still want to do it,” Bill told him. “It’ll just be… Ugh. Try your finger again.”

Tom eagerly slid his finger in again, dryly. Bill hissed and pressed his face flat against Tom’s neck. He felt violated, but in an exciting way. He shifted in Tom’s lap, making it easier for the intrusion. Tom stroked Bill’s hair as he pushed in a little further, and Bill contracted his muscles. Tom gasped and tried to pull his finger out.

“What?” Bill widened his eyes.

“I felt that. I fucking felt that.”

Bill smiled and squeezed himself around Tom’s finger again. “Imagine…”

Tom could easily imagine that pressure and heat around his cock. He groaned and pulled his finger out, Bill whining in both protest and relief. Tom’s groin ached. “Bill, I want to fuck you.”

Bill opened his mouth to speak, but Tom hushed him.

“Pretend,” Tom said “Get on your knees.”

Bill squirmed under Tom’s intense gaze, but turned over anyway. He could hear Tom fucking with his pants and soon felt Tom’s heat behind him.

“I’d put it in you this way,” Tom said. He pressed his cock down Bill’s crease and rubbed it against Bill’s sore entrance. “I want to do it this way.”

“No,” Bill panted, rocking back against Tom’s cock. “I want to be on my back, I want you to kiss me.”

Tom flipped Bill over and grabbed his knees, kneeling between Bill’s legs. He tilted his head. “Both ways.”

“It’s my present, I get to say how I give it,” Bill said slyly.

Tom spread Bill’s thighs wide and leaned forward. “Both ways.”

Bill smiled. “Maybe.”

Tom nudged his aching cock right against Bill’s hole, the heat almost burning them. Bill sighed and reached forward, trying to touch Tom. “Tomi.”

“Hm.” Tom leaned forward even more and bumped noses with Bill. “Yeah?”

“If we do this,” Bill said softly. “Then it’s forever, right?”

“We don’t have to do this for it to be forever,” Tom said, frowning. “It already is.”

Bill sniffed, trying to hide the fact that tears were brimming in his eyes. “Okay. Because it’s gonna be you, and no one else. Not ever.”

Tom nodded and kissed Bill hard, still gripping his knees. Bill blinked away a tear and cupped Tom’s face. They heard the familiar sound of a car pulling into the driveway and they both gasped.

“Shit,” Tom muttered, already tugging his pants up.

“I know, I know,” Bill said, scrambling for his own pants. “I know.”

“Hurry,” Tom whispered. “You look like you just did it.”

Bill smoothed his hair down and wiped at his face. “I didn’t.”

Tom grinned and kissed Bill quick before they both zipped up and plopped back down on the couch. Soon, Simone and Gordon came through the door, looking cold and slightly drunk.

“Boys,” Simone greeted, sitting down next to them. She hugged Bill to her and Bill breathed in the cool, familiar scent. “The party ended a little sooner than expected.”

“We were just falling asleep,” Bill said.

Simone stroked Bill’s hair softly and then, touched his cheek. “You’re so warm and your eyes look a little glassy. You aren’t getting sick, are you? ”

Bill sniffed again. “Hope not.”

“Gross,” Tom said.

“Shut up, Tom, or you’ll only get a lump of coal for Christmas,” Bill said wickedly.

Simone laughed and patted Bill on the head. “You boys behave.”

“I’ll give you a lump,” Tom said, giving Bill a look.

The two boys shared a secret smile.

Don't Tell Mom (4/?)

Thu, 18 Oct 2007 01:25:28 GMT

Title: Don't Tell Mom (4/?)
Previous Chapters: Here
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17 (eventually)
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: What Mom doesn't know won't kill her.

.age 14.

Tom stared at his hands as the waitress stood next to the table, waiting for him to order. The man across the table cleared his throat and Tom just scowled.

“Tom,” the man said, his voice impatient.

“I’m not hungry,” Tom said, looking up at the waitress. “Nothing for me.”

“Tom,” the man said again. He looked at the waitress and sighed. “He’ll have a cheeseburger and fries.”

The waitress nodded and wrote down the order. “Will that be all?”

“Yeah,” Tom replied sullenly, looking at the table again.

“Thank you,” the man said, and the waitress walked away. “Tom…”

“What, Dad?” Tom mumbled. The florescent lights of the small restaurant were giving off a dull buzz, and his mouth felt papery dry. “I’m seriously not hungry.”

“Try to enjoy yourself,” his father said, leaning forward. “I don’t get to see you often.”

“I know.”

Uncomfortable silence hung between them. Tom didn’t have anything to say to Jorg.

“So, you look good,” Jorg finally said. Tom nodded, tearing at his napkin. “Well. Except that hair.”

“What’s wrong with it?” Tom mumbled. He knew it was coming; every damn time, his father had to say something about his hair. He’d been dreading it and growing it out for years, and Jorg just couldn’t accept that.

“Your mother should cut it,” Jorg said. “But you look good. You’re growing up.”

“Um. Thanks.” Tom couldn’t give a shit what his father thought. The twins only had to see him every few months, and that was only because Simone made them. They hadn’t gotten along with their father for years, not since the divorce.

“So, how is Bill doing? Not still wearing that makeup, is he? Why does your mother allow that?”

Tom sighed. “She doesn’t care. I don’t care. Bill’s just Bill.”

“I hope this isn’t encouraged by those record producers,” Jorg said disapprovingly.

“They don’t tell him to stop.”

Jorg winced. “It presents a certain… way about him. What will people think?”

“Bill’s okay,” Tom said testily.

“It’s too bad he couldn’t make it tonight.”

"Fuckin' shame."

"Tom," Jorg said sternly. The waitress arrived with their drinks, and Tom began sipping on his Coke. "Is Bill going to be okay? He was ill last time I came to get you two, as well.”

Tom wanted to laugh. Bill wasn’t sick, he was just good at pretending to be sick when he wanted to get out of something. And Bill didn’t want to see their father. He’d broken down into tears the night before at the thought of it. Tom remembered that and it made his fists clench. He hated his fucking dad.

“I hope your mother isn’t coddling him,” Jorg said. “She’ll make him into a sickly boy.”

That made Tom’s blood boil and all he did was glare in response. He wanted to slug his father right in the face.

“So…” Jorg coughed. “Your mother is doing well?"

"Yeah. Gordon is great." Tom glared at his father for a second, and then looked down again.

"How's school going?" Jorg asked. "This whole music thing isn't interfering, I hope."

Tom frowned. "It's fine."

"Both you and your brother are keeping up, right?"

"What do you care?" Tom muttered.

“Tom,” Jorg said sharply. “I’m your father and I care.”

Tom didn’t believe him, but he didn’t want to fight. Well, actually, he did. “If you cared, you’d see us more often.” Tom didn’t want to see his father at all, but he knew it was safe to call his bluff.

“I’m very busy with work,” Jorg said.

“Yeah, okay.” The waitress stopped by again, this time with their food. Tom poked at his burger.

“You’re too skinny, you need to eat,” Jorg said, taking a massive bite out of his own sandwich. He looked disgusting to Tom right then, like an animal. Tom shoved a French fry in his mouth and looked down at his plate. Only an hour or so more and then he could go home.

Home to Bill. Tom smiled a little.

“Your mother tells me that you’re dating a nice girl,” Jorg said.

Tom groaned. “Why did she tell you that?”

“I like to know these things.”

“Yeah, I am,” Tom said blankly. “She’s nice.”

“Name?”

“Gabi.”

Jorg nodded. “How long have you been seeing her?”

“’Bout a month.” Tom shoved a few fries in his mouth and took a long sip of soda. “She’s cute,” he said with his mouth full.

Jorg smiled. “And Bill? Your mother mentioned something about him dating a girl, too, but I can’t honestly believe that.”

“Why?”

“Because your brother… isn’t like you,” Jorg said, taking the last bite of his burger. He wiped his mouth with a napkin. “He isn’t. Well. You know,” he laughed softly.

“No.” Tom gave Jorg a steady glare. “Are we ready to go yet?”

“You’ve barely touched your food,” Jorg said, looking slightly disappointed. “Don’t you want dessert? You can get whatever you like.”

“No.” Tom thunked his feet against the booth rudely.

“Well, I want dessert.” Jorg put down his napkin. “If you don’t mind.”

Tom shrugged, kicking his feet even harder against the booth.

“You know,” Jorg said, giving Tom a level stare. “You could at least try and have a good time. You could pretend to enjoy yourself, for me.”

Tom couldn’t stop himself. “You could pretend to be a good father.”

Jorg’s eyes burned hot and Tom thought he was going to reach across the table and smack him. Instead, he took out his wallet and threw some bills down. “I’m going to use the bathroom. Go to the truck.” Jorg got up and left Tom alone at the table.

Some sort of satisfaction rushed through Tom. If Jorg thought he could walk in and out of their lives whenever he wanted to, he was wrong. Tom hated him. He hated the way he talked to Bill, the way he talked about Bill. He made it more than clear that he thought Bill was weird, and that he favored Tom.

And Tom hated the way he talked to their mother, so condescending and cold.

Tom got out of the booth, still tense from the conversation with his father and left the restaurant. He kicked at the wheel of his father’s old truck. “Jerk,” he mumbled, and got into the vehicle.

A few minutes later Jorg returned, turning on the radio just loud enough so that he wouldn’t have to talk to Tom. Normally this would be preferable, but something was going on in Tom’s head that night, and he didn’t want to let his father off the hook. Tom turned the radio down just a bit as they pulled out onto the road.

“Bill got his tongue pierced,” Tom said evenly. He saw his father’s hands tighten on the steering wheel.

“What?”

“Yeah, it’s really cool. Even cooler than the eyebrow ring.”

“Really.”

Tom nodded. “Mom thinks so, too.”

“Your mother?”

“Yeah,” Tom said. “Don’t suppose you saw Bill on TV last year.”

“That was humiliating,” Jorg said, almost under his breath, but Tom heard it.

“Oh yeah?” Tom tensed in his seat. “Humiliating for who? You? Bill?”

Jorg glanced at Tom quickly. “I couldn’t believe it. And now the tongue ring?”

“He’s going to be a star.”

“He’s going to be a star, alright.” Jorg let out a bitter laugh.

Tom stared straight ahead. “Yup.”

“Your brother,” Jorg said, shaking his head. “He hasn’t changed at all. The makeup… the hair, the clothes… Never thought I’d have a fucking fag for a son.”

Tom felt anger flow through his veins and he turned to glare at his father. “Take it back.”

Jorg glanced at Tom again. “Calm down, Tom.”

“You know, Bill’s not even sick,” Tom snapped. “He just didn’t want to see you. Again.”

Jorg didn’t respond, just turned up the radio and stared out at the road. Tom wanted to keep prodding him, he was so fucking angry.

“So what if Bill’s gay?” Tom said over the music. “It’s not wrong.”

Jorg didn’t even look at him. “Your brother isn’t gay, it’s just a phase.”

Tom didn’t know if Bill was gay or not, he didn’t care. Of course they did things together that would be considered gay, but Tom didn’t really think of himself or Bill like that. Tom was pissed that his dad seemed to think there was something wrong with it.

“You just called him a fag,” Tom said.

“Don’t talk back to me,” Jorg grunted out. “You have no respect.”

“And you’re an asshole,” Tom said. “Don’t you ever talk about Bill like that again.”

Jorg gritted his teeth together; Tom hadn’t ever seen him this mad up close. The truck pulled into the boys’ driveway, but instead of driving up to the house, Jorg stopped the truck, putting it in park.

“I’m going to have a talk with your mother when we get inside, and you will not use that language,” Jorg barked out. “Do you understand?”

“No,” Tom shot back. “I’m sick of listening to you. It’s fuckin’ maddening. All you ever do is criticize me, Bill, Mom. You’re not coming in.”

“I’m your father!” Jorg shouted.

“Then where have you been?” Tom yelled back. “Don’t call Bill a fag ever again. Don’t ever talk about him. He doesn’t want to see you!”

Jorg’s face went red and he held his hand up, almost bringing it forward and hitting Tom across the face. Tom shrank back, wincing at the motion that never connected. Immediately, Jorg dropped his hand, his face paling.

Tom pushed the door open and jumped out of the car. “Leave us alone!” he yelled, and slammed the door before running up the driveway to the house. He was shaking, sweating, and almost crying. He’d never been angrier.

When Tom got inside, he stopped in the foyer and took a few deep breaths. He caught sight of himself in a mirror that their mother had hung in the hall years ago, and he rubbed at his cheeks a bit. They were red, and his eyes were glistening. He couldn’t cry because of his father, though. He’d come close, but he never had, because Bill did.

The moment he had composed himself, he took his coat off and dropped it on the floor. His mother would kill him, but he didn’t really care. “I’m home,” he called out, not loudly. He wasn’t sure if he wanted the attention yet.

“Tomi?” Bill poked his head around the corner, from the living room, and frowned. “What’s wrong? What happened?”

“Upstairs,” Tom said, already turning to go to his room. Bill was at his heels. “Is Mom home?”

“She is,” Bill said. “But she’s in her studio.”

“Okay.”

Bill grabbed Tom’s hand and they disappeared into Tom’s room. When they got in, Bill shut the door and Tom punched his bed mattress as hard as he could.

“What happened?” Bill asked quietly, curling up on Tom’s bed.

“Dad’s just… you know. He’s Dad. He’s an asshole.” Tom let out a hot breath. “I can’t see him anymore.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t go.”

“No.” Tom took Bill’s face in his hands and kissed his chin. “No, I never want him to see you again. He doesn’t deserve to see you.”

“What?” Bill tilted his head, confused. “Was it really bad?”

Tom let go of Bill and shrugged. “Yeah.”

“Gabi called for you,” Bill said dully. “I told her you’d call back.”

Tom groaned.

"You don't have to call her," Bill said, sitting on the bed.

"I probably should, she's mad at me all the time," Tom said. He looked at Bill and sighed. "I yelled at Dad. Bad."

Bill frowned. "What did he say this time?"

Tom couldn't tell Bill what Jorg had said about him, he never could. "Oh, you know, same old, same old. He thinks I'm a no good trouble maker, and you're the favorite of course." Bill made a face and Tom sat down next to him. "He was really interested in the whole girlfriend thing, though."

"I hate your girlfriend," Bill said suddenly. "Don't call her."

Tom smiled lopsidedly. “Maybe I will. I hope Dad never tries to take us out again, I am not going.”

“I’ll go next time,” Bill said bravely.

“No,” Tom said firmly. “I won’t let you.”

Bill frowned. “Don’t call Gabi… She’s not worth your time.”

“What if she breaks up with me?”

Bill grinned wide.

“Okay, okay,” Tom laughed. He nudged Bill, smiling at him. He already felt much better. “One of us has to keep a girlfriend, though.”

“Oops,” Bill said sheepishly.

Tom pulled Bill into a tight hug, Bill crawling into his lap and wrapping his legs around Tom’s waist. Their lips connected and they silently rocked together, enjoying the kiss. When they pulled back, Tom stared at Bill’s lips. He thought of someone else kissing them, and he shuddered.

“Tom?”

"Hm?"

"I need to tell you something," Bill said, a bit of uncertainty in his eyes.

Tom's stomach turned a bit, he hated when Bill kept things from him with a passion. They were normally the sort of things that broke his heart, like the time Bill finally admitted he'd been getting knocked around by some bullies at school. Tom had been so angry and upset with himself for not knowing earlier, that the next day he marched right up to the older kids and tried pounding them into the pavement.

The only one who got pounded was Tom.

"What is it?" Tom asked. "Is someone hurting you?"

Bill shook his head. "No, uh. Um. You'll be mad."

Tom raised an eyebrow. "Did you do something to my guitar?"

Bill hid his face in Tom's neck. "Worse." Tom couldn't think of anything really worse than that. "IkissedNatalie."

Tom became silent. Bill slowly pulled his face away from Tom’s neck and looked at him with wide eyes. “Are you so mad at me? I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

“Bill,” Tom said, trying to keep a straight face. “I can’t believe you’d… do that.”

“I did,” Bill said in a small voice.

Tom shook his head and leaned back on the heels of his hands. “Well…”

Bill bit his lip.

Tom cracked a grin. “I did, too. I kissed Gabi.”

“I know,” Bill said, pushing Tom in the shoulder. “I saw you, after school. So I kissed Natalie to, you know, make you jealous or something.”

“You wanted me to be jealous?” Tom started laughing.

Bill sighed loudly. “You kissed someone.”

“I know,” Tom said softly. “I’m sorry.”

“I hate that.”

“I just had to see if it was different,” Tom explained. “Different than… kissing you.”

Bill folded his arms. “So?”

Tom leaned forward and kissed Bill harder than he had in a while. Bill lost his breath and fell against Tom, wrapping his arms around Tom’s neck and arching into him, their growing arousals rubbing together. Bill gasped for air and pulled back, his lips swollen and wet.

“Of course it was different,” Tom said, touching Bill’s bottom lip. “It sucked, compared to you.”

"You're lying," Bill said, a small smile on his face.

"No way," Tom said. "She didn't even know what to do with her tongue. Not like you."

Bill's smile turned into a grin. "So, can we stop kissing girls now?"

"If you let me kiss you more often," Tom said, pressing soft kisses to Bill's throat.

"We can't, we shouldn't now," Bill whined. "Mom."

"Yeah, but..." Tom knew they were pushing it, kissing before bedtime. But he couldn't help himself, he was all worked up over his visit with their father and he needed Bill. "Can I just kiss you a bit more?"

Bill was flushing already. "A bit more always turns into a lot more."

"It won't tonight, I promise. Please? I'm all worked up over Dad," Tom said, pouting just a little.

Bill nudged their lips together. "Poor Tomi."

“Boys,” Simone called. “Come down to get your laundry!”

“Fuck,” Tom murmured against Bill’s lips. They both grinned and Bill hopped out of Tom’s lap.

“Poor Mom, she had to wash your gross, jizzy sheets,” Bill said in a sing song voice.

Tom made a face. “Ew, Bill. Like yours are any better.”

Bill turned around. “Mine are barely ever used.”

Tom stole one more kiss and then they went downstairs.

**

Andreas grinned. “So we were at the movies, right? And I pay for her and all, I get her snacks. It ended up being, like, all my money, but I’m thinking it might be worth it.”

“Yeah?” Tom shoved his hands in his pockets, shivering. They were walking home from hanging out downtown one Saturday afternoon. Bill was clutching hot chocolate through mittened fingers.

“Yeah. So we get into the theater, and she sits down. I go to sit next to her and she gives me this really weird look,” Andreas went on. “I’m like, ’What?’”

“Wrong girl?” Bill guessed.

“I don’t know how it happened,” Andreas replied, laughing. “But yeah. It wasn’t her. It was this other blonde girl.”

“How was there even enough time for you to lose her like that?” Tom asked.

Andreas held his hands up. “I have no freaking idea. So my date got really pissed at me and left. The other girl wasn’t too happy with me, either. Neither was her boyfriend.”

The three of them laughed hard. Bill took a long sip of his hot drink, chattering from the cold. “I’d never do that,” he said.

“I might,” Tom said, cringing. “They all look the same, sometimes.”

“Yours doesn’t,” Andreas said. “Gabi’s… hot.”

“Thanks,” Tom said, and weirdly enough, he felt a little proud. Bill scowled next to him.

“It’s too bad about Natalie,” Andreas said to Bill. “She dumped your ass.”

“I didn’t call her enough,” Bill shrugged.

“Some girls are so demanding.” Andreas let out a breath, the air fogging in front of him. “So, she’s available?”

“Go for it,” Bill said blandly.

“You’re insane,” Andreas said. “Jesus.”

“I have my eye on someone else, anyway,” Bill replied. “Someone better.” Bill glanced at Tom and smiled softly.

“Yeah, you deserve better,” was Tom’s response.

**

Tom smoothed his hand through Bill’s hair again and again, watching the strands slip between his fingers as Bill’s mouth worked him. Bill’s mouth was half teasing, half serious. He was hunched over Tom and sucking him, doing it just for Tom and Tom was so fucking grateful for it.

Bill had gotten very good at it, Tom thought, so good that he could swallow just a bit of it and make Tom’s toes curl and his eyes roll back in his head. Bill loved doing it, too. He loved making Tom feel that way, he loved being in the seat of power because usually it was Tom who was in control when they were being intimate.

Any other time, though, Bill gladly gave up the power if it meant Tom would pay attention to him in that way.

Bill inhaled Tom’s cock deep into his mouth, almost touching the back of his throat. He felt Tom clutch at his hair and tug, and Bill smiled, his teeth dragging delicately along Tom’s sensitive length. Tom moaned and slid down further, bumping Bill’s head and caressing behind Bill’s ear. Bill sighed, hot breaths surrounding Tom’s cock.

“Bill, just… keep doing that,” Tom managed, opening one eye and glancing down at his brother’s head, bobbing up and down. Bill swallowed around Tom’s cock, drawing some moisture and relishing in the startling taste. Bill loved taking Tom in and swallowing him, he loved every aspect of it.

Bill got on his knees and put two hands around the base of Tom’s cock, sucking more powerfully. He always saved that trick because it usually drove Tom over the edge. Tom was putting up a good fight that night, though. He slid his hands down, cupping Bill’s face, his thumbs pressing against Bill’s moving jaw.

“Oh,” Tom moaned loudly. Bill glanced up sharply. Both their parents were home, just downstairs. Bill shook his head and grinned, warning his brother with his eyes to keep it down. Tom waved him off and let his head fall back. He let go of Bill and grabbed at the headboard, sliding down more, trying his hardest not to explode.

He didn’t want to come yet, everything felt so good and safe. He hissed, “Oh yeah, oh yeah,” softly through his teeth and worked his hips just a little bit, shallowly thrusting into Bill’s hot mouth. Bill took it, though Tom knew it must have been difficult to keep at it with him moving around so much.

And then he felt his balls tighten and his stomach drop out. He was going to come and there was nothing he could do to stop it. The feeling was rising uncontrollably, a few more sucks and it’d be over. Tom sighed and then his stomach twisted; suddenly it wasn’t enough.

His heart hurt and he looked down at Bill, obediently sucking him, making soft, encouraging noises and he couldn’t stop himself from tugging Bill off his cock. “Stop,” Tom said as Bill attempted to suck him right back in.

“What… what?” Bill looked confused and a bit flustered. “What did I do wrong?”

“Bill.” Tom pushed Bill back and crawled over him, hugging his little body. “I want… to have sex with you.”

Bill gulped, moving strangely under Tom. “What?”

“Yeah, I want to have sex with you,” Tom said again, this time more confident. “I just decided.”

“Movie sex?” Bill asked carefully. “Or real sex?”

“Real sex, like… me inside you.”

Bill stared blankly at Tom. “I thought we were having sex… as much as we can, anyway.”

Tom shook his head. “I think I know another way… A better way.”

“How?”

Bill was looking at Tom like he was crazy. He couldn’t imagine what his brother meant. Tom leaned into him and put his hand on Bill’s back. “I’m going to show you. Don’t freak out.”

“Okay.” Bill felt Tom rub at his back, and then Tom’s hand trailed down his spine, gently. Bill arched his back and lifted, trying to understand what Tom was doing. Tom’s fingers danced along his ass, and then, they delicately nudged at the crease. “Tom?”

“Here,” Tom whispered. He stroked his fingers between the crease and brushed Bill’s hole. “Here. Okay?”

Bill’s eyes widened and he scooted back a little. “You want to put your… in there??”

“That’s like sex,” Tom said simply. “That’s how we’d have sex.”

“But that’s where I go,” Bill said, feeling so very confused. “I don’t want your dick to go there.”

“Bill,” Tom said softly. “Why not?”

“You wouldn’t like it,” Bill said, worry in his voice. “You wouldn’t like me. I’m gross.”

Tom sighed and stroked Bill’s bottom softly. “I’d never think you were gross. I think… it’d be really hot.”

“Why?” Bill flushed a deep red.

Tom let his finger slide across Bill’s hole again, feeling it twitch under his gentle caress. “It’d be really tight.”

“Tom, you’re making me blush,” Bill said. “Really bad.”

“I would be so, so very careful with you,” Tom added. He kissed Bill’s ear. “Don’t I always take care of you? And you might like it, too.”

“You would be in me,” Bill said, biting at his lip. “All the way in there?”

“Yeah,” Tom said. “As deep as you’d let me.”

Bill couldn’t help but smile, his heart fluttering at the words. “I’d let you go as deep as you wanted.”

Tom sucked Bill’s ear into his mouth and Bill moaned. “When?” Tom asked.

Bill squirmed a bit. “I’m too little for sex.”

“How long do you wanna wait?”

Bill touched Tom’s cheeks and kissed him softly. “I’ll try not to make you wait too long, Tomi.”

Their lips met and Tom moved over Bill, making them both come apart against the sheets.

Lit Up

Wed, 17 Oct 2007 07:26:47 GMT

Title: Lit Up
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: All Bill wanted was a quiet night alone.

“Bill.”

Bill peeks his head out into the bedroom, spying Tom on the bed. “Yes?”

“How long are you going to be in there?” Tom asks, staring up at the ceiling. Bill hadn’t even known he was in the room, he’d been staring at his pores in his magnifying mirror.

“Why?” Bill asks.

Tom shrugs. “I’m bored.”

Bill slips into the bathroom and goes back to leaning against the counter, staring at his skin. “So?”

“I had a date tonight, but she bagged out on me,” Tom says. “I think her mom didn’t want her out on a school night or something.”

“Sorry,” Bill says, not really paying attention. “Go see what Georg and Gustav are doing?”

“You and I never hang out anymore,” Tom says, getting up and walking to the bathroom. He leans against the doorframe, watching his brother. “They’re busy.”

Bill laughs shortly, putting the mirror down. “So you’re stuck with me.”

“Not stuck,” Tom replies.

“I can’t go out,” Bill says, eyeing himself in the mirror. The bathroom lighting is just awful. “I’ve got like… a whole night planned.”

“Like what?” Tom asks, doubt in his voice. “What could you, a magnifying mirror, and a box of whatever this shit is,” Tom holds a small box of hair dye up, “have to do?”

Bill scoffs. “I was going to dye my hair and watch bad Pay-Per-View movies,” he says, staring at his now blotchy skin in the mirror. He’d been poking and prodding at his skin all night. It’s a bad habit but it keeps him centered. “What would you want to do?”

Tom grins, digs into his pocket, and pulls out a small plastic bag. He shakes it in front of Bill.

“Oh no, you are not getting me stoned again,” Bill says. He holds his hands up but Tom moves in on him.

“Come on, you need to chill out, you’re too stressed,” Tom says.

“You were going to smoke that with some little bimbo and take advantage of her,” Bill says, trying to take the moral high ground.

“Bill, you’re such a bitch,” Tom says, not unkindly. Bill rolls his eyes. “I’m supposed to be getting laid, have a heart.”

“Boo hoo, poor Tomi’s gonna get blue balls,” Bill says. “I am not going to get high and watch porn with you.”

“I didn’t say anything about porn!”

“But that was your idea, right?” Tom looks sheepish. “This is so up Georg’s alley. Where is he?”

Tom frowns. “Bill, you’re no fun anymore.”

“I am too! I just like doing other stuff.”

Tom doesn’t look convinced. “Like what? Shopping? Hugging kittens and chasing rainbows? You are such a girl.”

Bill just scowls. “Oh Jesus, fine. I’ll watch porn, get high, and drink beer with you.”

“How’d you know I brought beer?”

“There’s always beer,” Bill says, rolling his eyes. “I hate beer.”

“Sorry, I didn’t bring any girly drink mixes with me,” Tom apologizes, smirking.

“I’m a bitch,” Bill remarks. “You’re an asshole.”

“Come on,” Tom pleads, tugging on the shoulder of Bill’s shirt. “We can dye your hair when you’re good and baked.”

“Great idea,” Bill says dryly. “Then we can trim your pubes.”

“Gross.” Tom exits the bathroom and Bill sighs, long and loud, making sure Tom hears it. “Bill, we doing this or what?”

Bill wanders out of the bathroom, still poking his face. “You know I’m a singer and we have a show tomorrow. I’ll have a beer and I’ll watch porn, but I’m not smoking shit.”

“It won’t hurt, just once,” Tom says, taking his glass pipe out of his pocket. It’s green and marbly, a gift from Georg on Tom’s sixteenth birthday. It was the gift that kept on giving; even Jost had gotten some use out of it.

“I’ll be coughy tomorrow.” Bill frowns. “Raspy.”

“The girls will love it.”

“Tom…”

“Come on,” says Tom, patting the seat next to him. “We can watch whatever you want.”

“So long as it’s porn, right?” Bill finishes. “I told you I’ll drink some of your disgusting beer, alright?”

Tom grins mischievously. “Oka-ay.” Bill doesn’t like the look on Tom’s face, not at all. It’s the sort of look that always gets them both in trouble.

Bill plops down on the bed beside Tom and takes the offered beer. He sets it aside momentarily and flicks on the television, immediately finding the adult entertainment section. “Anything look good?” Bill asks. He picks up his bottle of beer and tries in vain to open it. “Ugh. Tomi?”

Tom sighs and grabs the bottle, easily popping the top off. “Baby.” Bill grabs the bottle back and takes a long swig. “Let’s watch this one.”

“Typical,” Bill says, making a face as he guzzles more beer. The only way for him to drink the stuff is to do it as quickly as possible. Bill looks up at the screen again, Tom’s selected a movie with two girls kissing on the cover.

“Don’t tell me that doesn’t look hot.”

Bill’s never really had a thing for girls kissing, but he doesn’t want Tom to know, or anyone else, for that matter. He grins and says, “Looks awesome.”

Tom grunts in approval and presses play. Bill curls his legs under his body and they watch quietly for a few minutes as the girls on screen begin to go at it. No dialogue. No plot. Just sex.

“They look like twins,” Bill comments, trying to find some deeper meaning in the porn.

Tom glances at Bill, shaking his head. “Nah, they’re just two blondes.”

Bill has about a quarter of his beer left. He makes a face and downs the rest of it, ready for another. He’ll need another to stomach this garbage. “Tom, toss another over here.”

Tom is about to hand the bottle over, but then stops and twists the cap off, using the bottom of his shirt. Bill grabs the bottle and takes the first sip, and already, it doesn’t taste all that bad. He’s getting tipsy.

“This music is so bad,” Bill says, lying down on his stomach. “And… God, it looks like I filmed this in our basement.”

“I wish,” Tom murmurs. The girls are all over each other now, using fingers and tongues. “Fuck. That looks so good.”

“It looks cheap.” Bill laughs and takes another long sip of the beer. “This stuff is like piss.”

“When were you drinking piss?” Tom finishes his beer and crawls over the bed to get his pipe. “I’m gonna light up, is that okay?”

“I don’t care,” Bill says, staring at the screen. He guesses that it is kind of hot, just not his kind of hot. Tom is rustling with his little baggy. It’s always reminded Bill of catnip. Human nip.

“I don’t know how much more of this I can take,” Bill groans, pointing to the television. “They like, re-cast the girl halfway through. Did they think no one would notice? God, her tits are so gross.”

“Shut up,” Tom says, attempting to light his pipe. “Just watch.”

Bill watches, he watches Tom. Tom lights up the pipe and takes a long hit. He coughs a little as he pulls back, and Bill finishes his beer.

“You already look stoned,” Bill says, feeling a bit giddy. “How is that possible?”

“Because you’re a lightweight and already drunk,” Tom says. He takes another long suck off the pipe. “Want?”

Bill looks from the terrible porn to the glowing pipe. “Um.”

“Come on, let’s get fucked up,” Tom says, eyes inviting. Bill suddenly wants Tom to think he’s cool. Tom never thinks he’s cool.

Bill nods and takes the pipe from Tom, almost dropping the thing.

“Careful,” Tom says. “You know how to do it?”

“Of course.” Bill doesn’t, really, though he’s watched Georg and Tom do it countless times. He puts the pipe to his mouth and sucks.

“Bill,” Tom laughs. The girls on the screen moan loudly. “You’ve got to put your finger over the hole.”

“What hole?” Bill feels embarrassed, and then feels even more embarrassed for feeling embarrassed. Tom is all smiles, though, and not the patronizing kind. He scoots in real close (and warm, Bill thinks), and guides Bill’s finger over the small hole on the side of the bowl.

“Hold it and suck,” Tom says. “And then let go. And try holding it in.”

Bill nods and does it. His lungs burn immediately, and all thoughts of looking cool fly out the window. He hacks out a cough, hunching over, his eyes watering. He looks with bleary eyes to the television and the two girls are going at it with neon colored dildos. The moment Bill stops coughing up a lung he says, “Jesus Christ, that’s so tacky.”

Tom howls out some laughter and takes the pipe from Bill. “It’s fuckin’ hot. Look at her take it.”

Bill is still wheezing from the offensive, burning smoke that had traveled down his windpipe. “She probably can’t do much else.” He takes a deep breath, holding his middle. “So fucking tacky.”

The girls are rubbing against each other now, the dildos still in them. Tom is staring, the pipe against his lips. “Fuh…”

Bill rolls his eyes and tries to take the pipe back from Tom. “Let me try again.”

Tom nods and holds the pipe for Bill, covering the hole with one expert finger. They lock eyes as Bill breathes in and holds it for a few seconds, and then he pulls back as he releases the hot smoke from his lips. He coughs this time, too, but he can feel the effects.

“What do you think?” Tom asks. His eyes are heavy lidded, and he tugs at his cap.

“More beer,” Bill says, crawling on his elbows to get another bottle. He tries to twist the cap off with his own shirt, but fails. “Fuck!”

“Give,” Tom says. Bill feels helpless as Tom easily pops the cap off. “You’re useless.”

Bill tries to stand, but finds his knees quite wobbly. “You know who’s useless? Gustav is useless.”

“He keeps the beat,” Tom says, his words slurring as he takes another hit. Bill climbs over to Tom and yanks the pipe out of his mouth.

“Watch me,” Bill breathes. “I can do it.”

Tom laughs as Bill takes the sloppiest hit of pot known to man, but he just pats Bill on the back. “Good job,” he praises. His eyes turn back to the screen. “Oh, fuck, not this clown.”

Bill turns his head to the porn. A man has entered the scene. “Maybe he’ll fuck both of them,” he suggests. He giggles and rolls onto his back, spilling some beer on his shoulder.

“Bill, you make such a mess,” Tom laughs. “Such a fuckin’ mess.”

“Coooool it,” Bill says, sitting up and sloshing his beer onto his pants. “Okay, so, do you think they really want to be sucking that guy off right now? I mean, this is their job.”

“I love my job,” Tom says, taking another long hit. “Wanna suck this off?” He holds the pipe out to Bill.

Bill shakes his head no, but accepts the pipe anyway and takes his longest hit yet. He coughs his brains out for a good while, but then looks at the screen again, a pondering expression on his face. The girls on the screen are trying their best at giving the hairy, pot bellied man a blow job at the same time.

“Maybe they both wanted to be actresses,” Bill says goofily. “But they got, you know, stuck in porn. Like, maybe, um… they thought it’d further their careers.”

Tom just laughs his ass off in response. “Bill, oh God, you’re so stoned.”

“Hey! They’re wasting their lives just… blowing some middle aged guy,” Bill says. “It’s sorta sad, ya know? It’s not like their job is really challenging or anything. Man, give me that pipe.”

“You have the pipe,” Tom chuckles out. “It’s in your hand. And hey! Look at them go, that looks challenging to me.” Tom adjusts his crotch and smirks.

Bill rolls his eyes. “It isn’t that hard, I bet.”

“What? Sucking cock?” Tom almost looks scandalized. “No one’s even ever blown you.”

“But,” Bill says, sticking out his chest. “I bet it’s not that hard. You just like, um, lick and shit.”

Tom somehow has a beer bottle in his hand again, and he finishes it with a triumphant look on his face. “It’s more than licking, Bill, you idiot.”

Bill wants to look cool again, all of the fuzzy, warm feelings in his body are making him lean into Tom. He wiggles his fingers in front of Tom’s face and then very slowly shoves them into his mouth. He presses them as deep as he can go, and Tom makes sort of a surprised, scandalized face. Bill looks smug and removes his fingers. “See?”

“Your fingers aren’t the size of a dick,” Tom says, gesturing with his beer bottle. “And not nearly the size of that one,” he adds, pointing to the screen and wincing.

Bill’s eyes flash and he grabs Tom’s bottle. “This is.”

“No,” Tom says. “Not his.”

“It’s like mine,” Bill insists, wrapping his fingers around his neck of the bottle. “And yours, probably. Hang on - watch.”

Bill opens his mouth wide and puts the top of the bottle in his mouth. He wraps his lips around the top of the neck and gives Tom a twitching wink. He pushes the bottle in deeper and thinks, ‘This is so easy. Look at Tom’s face, the asshole didn’t think I could do it.’ For effect, he sinks the bottle down, touching the back of his throat with the tip. It tickles, and he swallows around it.

Tom watches with his mouth wide open; Bill has deep throated the beer bottle.

“You’ve sucked dick before,” Tom stutters out. “Why didn’t you tell me? I told you the first time I went down on a girl!”

Bill looks mildly offended as he pulls the bottle out of his mouth. “I have not!” But now Bill’s giggling so hard he’s vibrating. “Just because I can do that. You’re fucking perverted.”

“No, I’ve just had my dick sucked and that,” Tom groans, “was the work of someone who knows what they’re doing.”

Bill shrugs and drops the bottle on the floor. “Oops,” he says carelessly.

Tom is staring at Bill. “Do it again.”

“You do it,” Bill replies, glancing at the TV. They’re all fucking now, or trying to.

“I’m not gay, I can’t,” Tom says.

“I’m not gay,” Bill says, exasperated. He blinks a few times, the room’s gone out of focus. “Give me a bottle, I’ll do it again.”

“Take this.” Tom thrusts the pipe at Bill as he bends over to get another bottle. The bag of pot falls out of Tom’s pocket, and Bill picks it up.

“You dropped your nip,” Bill murmurs.

“My what?” Tom looks over his shoulder.

“Cat nip.” Bill drops the bag on the mattress. “Meow.”

Tom’s eyes go all dark and weird and Bill stops smiling a little bit. He takes a hit off the pipe so he doesn’t have to look at Tom. When he finishes and looks up, Tom’s holding an open bottle out to him, this one full.

“I can’t do it, it’s full,” Bill says, blinking. Tom stills holds it out. “Tommm.”

“Drink it,” Tom says.

“Um. I don’t know if I can,” Bill says.

Tom shakes his head and pushes the bottle right up against Bill’s chest. “C’mon… kitty.”

Bill immediately flushes. Tom can’t say that to him. He especially can’t say that to him in that voice. “But you’re my brother,” Bill says aloud.

Tom cocks his head to the side. “Drink it and show me how it’s done again.”

“But it’s… it’s on the tv,” Bill says. He brings the bottle to his lips and sips very gingerly. Tom puts a finger under the bottle and tips it up, forcing Bill to swallow an enormous mouth full. He sputters and tries to glare at Tom but everything feels so good. He leans over to Tom and pushes the bottle against his mouth.

Tom hates sharing glasses and bottles and...

“Forks,” Bill says with a small laugh.

Tom takes a long swig and then another. Soon the bottle is empty.

“Suck it,” Tom murmurs, guiding the bottle back to Bill’s mouth. Bill realizes exactly when Tom has gone from plain tipsy to completely wasted. “I wanna see you do that again.”

“Why?” Bill’s vision is hazy but he can see the look in Tom’s eyes. He feels like he’s about to get fucked or something, and he wonders if that’s how Tom looks at his girls. “It’s really effective,” Bill says.

“Huh?”

“Oh.” Bill shakes his head and deep throats the bottle again. Tom groans and pulls on the bottle, but Bill displays some resistance and keeps sucking it. “What?” he says, his mouth full.

“That’s so…” Tom trails off Hot, Bill thinks in his head, taking the bottle out of his mouth. Bill knows Tom meant to say it. Tom quirks the corner of his mouth up and rises to his knees. He runs the back of his hand down Bill’s neck. “Good kitty…”

“Not your fucking kitty,” Bill growls out.

“Shh,” Tom tugs at the collar of Bill’s shirt, and their chests bump. “Say meow.”

“You’re an idiot.”

“Do it.” Bill feels like he’s about to get fucked again.

“Meow…”

Tom grins and pushes Bill gently. Bill falls back, propping himself on his elbows. Tom drags a hand down Bill’s side and the smile leaves his face. Now his face is just… sex. Bill feels Tom petting him and suddenly, he wants to be petted.

He’s really stoned, too, so that might have something to do with it.

Bill looks up at Tom and grins. “Mew… Purr.”

“Kitty wants some more nip,” Tom says, bumping the mouth of the pipe against Bill’s lips. Bill keeps his mouth firmly shut and raises an eyebrow. “Kitty…”

“I don’t wanna,” Bill says, and that is the perfect opportunity for Tom to stick the pipe in. Bill sucks and Tom looks more than pleased.

“What is it like to be a cat?” Tom suddenly asks.

Bill blows out some smoke and stretches back. “M’not really a kitty,” Bill says.

Tom strokes Bill right up his belly and Bill chokes out a moan. “I got you from the pet shop,” Tom says, ducking his head and laughing. That pot is working some real magic on them both. “So, you must be a kitty. And you like my nip.”

“Then I must.” Bill arches his back and his eyes slip closed. “Be a cat.” He could fall asleep.

“No cat naps,” Tom says. Bill opens his eyes and Tom is leaning over him. “Wanna play?”

Bill rubs at his forehead, smoothing his long hair back. “Play what?”

Tom takes the pipe from Bill, and after one last hit from it he sets it down on the bedside table. “You ask too many questions.”

“You don’t ask enough,” Bill says. “You didn’t ask if you could pet me.”

“But you’re a kitty, so you must want to be petted,” Tom says, very logically. He strokes Bill’s leg from knee to hip. Bill does his best purr.

“Then what are you?”

“I’m your owner,” Tom says. “I own you.”

“I’m a stray.” Bill sits up and then gets on his hands and knees. He bumps into Tom. “No one owns me.”

“I picked you up off the street, Bill, and I gave you food,” Tom says. His voice is serious. “And so… you’re mine now. I gave you my nip.”

“You were going to give your nip to other kitties,” Bill says. He scrunches his face up and bumps Tom again. “You’re a bad owner, you’ve gotta take better care of me.”

“You gotta prove that you’re the best kitty,” Tom says. “What are you going to do to prove to me that you’re the best kitty?”

“Tell me how,” Bill yawns, letting his head fall back. Tom pinches Bill’s side and Bill squeaks. “Meow…”

Tom holds his hand out to Bill. “Do that thing to my fingers.”

“No,” Bill says, crouching back, his ass in the air. “No way.”

“Bill…”

Bill purrs, curling into a ball. “Tomi, why am I a kitty?”

Tom slides his hand up Bill’s back, hooking his fingers under Bill’s shirt and dragging it up. “Because you are,” Tom says simply. “Mine.”

“Ahh,” Bill hisses. Tom’s fingers are all along his spine now, it feels electric. “Pet me. No one’s ever pet me before.”

“Are you gonna do what I asked?”

“No.”

Tom groans and pulls his hand away. “I’m not petting you.”

“I’ll run away,” Bill warns, crawling to the end of the bed. “I won’t come back.”

Tom loops a finger into one of Bill’s back pockets and tugs. Bill falls backward, all arm and leg, and wiggles around before Tom. “You won’t run away,” Tom says calmly. Bill reaches a hand up and touches Tom’s face. It’s so warm.

“Take off your hats,” Bill says. “I hate them. Meow,” he adds.

“Only if you do what I asked.” Tom grins.

Bill pretends to hiss, but actually coughs. “Really want me to?” Bill feels very slinky, he nuzzles his face against Tom’s hand. He is playing on all the swirling, good feelings inside him. Nothing is screaming at him to stop, nothing is clicking and reminding him that sucking his brother’s fingers is probably not the best course of action.

“I want you to,” Tom says, and Bill giggles, immediately sucking in Tom’s fingers. He doesn’t know that Tom is freaking out as he sucks.

And Tom is, Tom’s squirming and watching with wide eyes.

Bill laps at the fingers in his mouth and then with a powerful suck, brings them just a bit down his throat. He has no gag reflex, never has, and he knows that Tom knows this. So why is Tom so excited about it?

Bill purrs, a deep rumble in his throat, and Tom moans and strokes his hair. Bill pulls off Tom’s fingers and licks all over his palm. “I got you all wet.”

Tom looks dumbstruck.

“Am I the best kitty?”

“Um.” Tom tugs on Bill’s hair, just hard enough for Bill to mewl. “I don’t know.”

“I sucked them for you,” Bill says. He crawls impossibly closer and tugs Tom’s hats off one by one. “Hey, that doesn’t feel any better.”

“What?”

“I thought when I took your hats off I’d feel better, like, you know, good.” Bill releases Tom’s dreadlocks from their rubber band. “Uh, Tomi, I feel funny. I think it was the cat nip.”

“Bill, I think I can make it feel better,” Tom says. “Good.”

Bill turns from Tom and fucks with the blankets. “Howwww? Tom? Will you pet me?”

“Yeah, yes,” Tom replies, crawling over Bill and holding him down. Bill squirms in Tom’s hold, and Tom puts his fingers just outside Bill’s mouth. “Suck them again.”

“They taste like beer bottle,” Bill says, but he sucks the fingers in again. Tom’s face is pleasure defined. Bill watches with wide, excited eyes. He isn’t sure what he and Tom are doing, but he is sure that he likes it.

“No more nip,” Tom chokes out. “No more fucking nip.”

“I want some,” Bill pleads.

Tom pins Bill to the mattress, his dreads hanging down and brushing Bill’s shoulders. “Your shirt reeks of beer.”

“Let me go.” Tom lets off on Bill and Bill pulls his shirt over his head, and tosses it to the floor. “No more beer smell.”

“Ungh.” Tom sits back, still holding Bill down. Bill tugs at his necklaces; a choker and a pendant. He looks decadent, stretched out along the mattress, and Tom leans forward again. “I’ve got a job for the kitty.”

“Meow, no,” Bill whimpers. “You’re crushing my nuts.”

Tom laughs and backs up, sitting on Bill’s thighs. He squeezes Bill’s sides and Bill gasps. “Do you want to know what your job is?”

Bill writhes gently beneath Tom, struggling to free himself, but only just. He props himself up on his elbows and mews softly, nudging Tom’s hand with his nose. “You’ve got something,” Bill says, pointing to Tom’s groin. There’s a very obvious bulge forming.

“That’s… kind of your job,” Tom says, his voice low and gravelly.

Bill looks dumbfounded. “What sort of job?”

Tom laughs, but he doesn’t sound exactly amused. “Blow,” he says.

Bill tries working it out in his head. Tom’s gotten him stoned out of his mind. Tom’s sitting on him. Tom’s made him suck his fingers. There’s annoying porn playing in the background. Tom’s erection is digging into his groin.

Into his own erection.

Bill realizes that’s what’s swirling in his stomach; arousal. He should jerk off or…

Tom moves slightly, staring down at Bill and Bill gasps.

Or Tom could keep doing that.

“So?” Tom asks.

Does he look anxious? What does he want again?

‘The job,’ Bill thinks. ‘Blow.’ Bill’s eyes widen and he says, his voice dangerously raspy, “You want a blowjob?”

Tom strokes down Bill’s neck and scratches very pleasantly behind his ear. “Yeah.”

“Like the bottle?” Tom nods. Bill’s never thought about blowing anyone, especially not Tom. Can he blow Tom? “More like suck,” Bill says softly. “What does blowing have to do with it?”

“It’s a blowjob,” Tom says firmly.

“Animals don’t have jobs,” Bill says seriously. He laughs loudly. “I’m a kitty, remember?”

“Animals don’t wear pants, either,” Tom shoots back.

Bill grins. “Oh.” He gives Tom a lopsided smirk and gets on his knees, working at his belt buckle. “You’re so right.”

Tom stares. “Bill, you don’t have to-”

“Sssssshhhhhh.” Bill unbuttons his fly and pushes his pants down his hips, and then tugs them off completely. He’s in just his boxer-briefs now, clingy little black things that are slipping down his ass anyway. “I guess animals don’t wear underpants, either.”

“No, they might-”

Bill wastes no time in peeling his shorts off. “Oh!”

Tom clears his throat and his shoulders slump. His eyelids look so heavy, he may as well be asleep. “Bill…”

Bill starts laughing, looking down at his cock. It’s hard and ready, and Bill puts a hand on his hip. “Look at that.”

“Umm.”

“Look what you did to me. You did this to me.” Bill is giggling hard, ignoring the wide eyed look on his brother’s face. “You got it hard! You’ve never done this to me. Oh. Oh.“

Tom swallows hard. “Bill?”

“Except for one time,” Bill goes on, leaning back on his haunches. “Lemme tell you, Tomi. It’s so funny.”

“It is?” Tom pulls at his collar and Bill crawls over to him, sidling up right beside him.

“Oh god, it’s the funniest story.” Bill laughs right in Tom’s ear. He nuzzles Tom’s ear briefly, petting his hands through Tom’s dreads. “One time,” he whispers this and Tom shivers. “I was in bed, ya know, sleeping. Well not. Ha! I was listening.”

“Listening?” Tom gulps loud enough for Bill to hear.

“We were in a hotel room, bad beds. I remember!” Bill laughs again, his tongue flicking out to give Tom the quickest, softest kitten lick to his ear. “You were in your room with, um, some girl and you were moaning.” Bill remembers it very well, and can’t help but just rub up against Tom a little. His cock brushes Tom’s shirt and he sighs. “It got all hard and I had to hump at the mattress to make it go away.” He pulls back. His story doesn’t really seem funny anymore.

Tom’s arm suddenly snakes around his waist, tight and strong. “You are such a bad kitty, Bill,” Tom says, his voice is deep and all gravelly sex again.

Bill squirms. “But I—”

Tom tugs at the choker around Bill’s neck and Bill mewls very much like a real kitty. “You shouldn’t listen to other people’s conversations.”

“But you were so loud,” Bill says.

Tom shakes his head, bringing his face a centimeter from Bill’s. Bill can smell beer on Tom’s breath, and smoke in his dreads. “Bad kitty.”

“No,” Bill whispers. “Good kitty.” He puts a hand on Tom’s thigh and squeezes. “Very good, good kitty.”

Bill falls backwards and splays out, perfectly naked. Tom raises his eyebrows and leans forward, propping himself up with two arms on either side of Bill. “I should make you sleep outside.”

“It’s cold.” Bill bites his lip, the hem of Tom’s shirt is brushing his cock. “Is your dick hard, too?”

“You know it is,” Tom murmurs, lowering himself down closer to Bill. “You’ve still got a job to do.”

“Blow,” Bill says.

Tom nods, a corner of his mouth smirking up. “Lickjob.”

“Suckjob.”

“Fuck.”

“Job.”

Tom groans and leans back. He pulls his shirt up and Bill stares at the sliver of exposed belly that Tom is flashing. It’s been a while since he’s seen any skin on Tom besides his head, hands, neck, and arms. “What else did you hear?” Tom asks. He slowly unsnaps the top button of his jeans.

“You sounded… really… heavy,” Bill mumbles, his eyes on Tom’s groin. “And fast.”

Tom nods, creasing his eyebrows. “Heavy how?”

“Like if… you were on me, I’d fall through the bed to the floor ‘cause you fucked me that way,” Bill says, scooting back a little. Tom advances slowly, flicking the second button of his jeans.

“Yeah?”

“You’re good at what you do, it sounded like.” Bill grins, wrinkling his nose.

“Too bad you’re a naughty kitty.”

“No way,” Bill says. He wants to roll over and grind against the bed, pretend the mattress is a body. Tom’s body. “I am so good.”

Tom’s got his pants down his hips and Bill can see the bulge in his brother’s boxers. Under normal circumstances he wouldn’t want that bulge in his mouth.

These aren’t normal circumstances. Bill is too baked to have any morals left. He sits up and hugs Tom’s waist.

“I don’t think I have enough fur to be a kitty, actually,” he says, very plainly before ducking his head down and bumping his nose into Tom’s groin. Tom stiffens, is he as wasted as Bill? and clutches tight to Bill’s shoulders. “You’ve got a lot of work for me to do,” Bill mumbles, and then his mouth is busy. “A lot… a lot… of work.”

He sucks Tom through the soft material, trying to get his mouth around as much of his brother’s dick as he can. Tom hisses and jerks above him.

“Fuck, Bill, take them off,” Tom says. He scrabbles to remove his boxers but Bill’s mouth is too firmly attached.

“Mmm,” Bill moans. He’s found the head, knows he likes to rub his own with his fingers, and sucks it into his mouth. He can taste Tom through the material, Tom’s wet. “Not like a girl, though,” Bill says, stopping to look up at Tom. “You’re very much not, uh, a bottle.”

Tom stares down at him like he’s crazy, sweat forming on his brow. “Bill, fucking hell, you’re just…”

Bill is surprised when Tom’s cock pushes out through the slit in the boxers without warning. It’s so hard and flushed red. But he spies the wet head, what he wants more of, and licks all of the taste away.

Tom grunts and his hands find Bill’s hair and twists. It should hurt but Bill’s too involved in doing his job. He’s too involved in trying to prove that he is not a bad kitty like Tom thinks.

Bill grips Tom’s hips and takes his cock almost all the way in his mouth. Tom’s cock is hot and so very moist, and it tastes like nothing Bill has ever tasted before. He’s pretty sure he shouldn’t even know what this tastes like. He pulls back and swirls his tongue around the tip, smacking his lips and really getting a taste for it.

“Good,” Tom says, staring at the ceiling and moving bashful, hesitant hands through Bill’s hair. Bill feels his head being pushed toward Tom’s dick and Bill almost feels indignant through his haze. He looks up and Tom is somewhere else completely; he’s not in this room, not in this moment, not here with Bill.

Bill bites down on Tom’s cock and now Tom’s with him again.

“Fuck!” Tom shouts, anger flashing across his face for just a split second. Bill gives him innocent eyes, his very best, and Tom cracks a grin. “That’s not being a good kitty.”

“Kitties don’t suck dick,” Bill says around Tom’s cock. Tom’s hips buck forward and Bill learns a neat trick. “You like when I have my mouth full of your dick?”

It’s muffled and garbled, but Tom groans out a “Yes,” and pulls Bill’s head close to his hips. Bill gasps and opens his throat up, almost choking. He likes it a lot, more than he’s liked something in a while, but is it worth choking for?

Bill pulls back with as much strength as he can muster. His mouth frees Tom’s cock and he wrinkles his nose. “You gotta take these off,” he says, tugging at Tom’s shorts.

Tom nods, “Anything.” He rips the boxers down his hips. He’s nearly naked now, except for that oversized shirt. Bill holds it up like a heavy curtain and blows on Tom’s stiff, angry cock.

“Calm it down, darling,” Bill mumbles to Tom’s cock. He pets it and slides Tom’s boxers off. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Suck it, now,” Tom says. He looks ill, like he might pass out. Bill tongues the slit of Tom’s dick again before deep throating it and kissing Tom’s hips.

Bill is such a good kitty, he knows it. He pulls his head back and pushes right back down, along with Tom’s guiding hands. Bill’s starting to enjoy Tom’s pulling and tugging, how rough he’s being.

“Mmm,” Bill hums and Tom pulls his hair hard. Bill moves his tongue near the base of Tom’s cock and Tom shudders. Bill pulls all the way out and suckles the head and Tom swears and asks him to take it back in. Bill sucks nice and good for a few minutes and then lets Tom’s erection slide from his mouth, nudging his chin.

“Bill, no,” Tom says breathlessly. “Kitty, please.”

Bill decides he is a kitty for sure, and therefore cannot talk. “Meow?”

Tom’s jaw clenches and he bumps his cock against Bill’s half open mouth. “Suck.”

Bill nuzzles the hard length, feeling almost sleepy. “Mew.”

Tom’s eyes narrow and his fingers curl around Bill’s choker. He jerks Bill closer and his cock slides easily into Bill’s startled mouth. “Now suck,” Tom demands.

Bill’s own cock throbs insistently. He obeys; sucks and lets Tom thrust as much as he likes. And Tom likes it, he’s groaning and petting Bill all over.

“Good kitty, good kitty,” Tom moans. He leans back a bit, sitting on his ass and Bill is hunching over his lap, sucking his brother as well as he can. It’s sloppy head, for sure, but it’s good head.

Tom once said any head is good head.

Bill uses his head, his mouth, his tongue, and sucks. And then he pulls back, one curious hand cupping Tom’s balls, and just licks up Tom’s cock.

Tom groans in frustration. “Don’t mess around,” he hisses out. “If you suck it I’ll pet you and, um, do whatever you want.”

Bill arches his back up and slides Tom down into his throat. He doesn’t realize how unbelievably sexy he’s being, how attractive the curve of his spine is. How his cock is digging into Tom’s thigh and getting it all wet.

Bill works his mouth better than the girls on television, because that shit’s still playing, but with different girls doing different guys. As Bill sucks, hearing Tom swear and cry out, “I’m gonna come!” he wonders if Tom thinks he’s cool now.

“Am I?” Bill asks, his mouth very full.

Tom hisses something incoherent and then Bill feels warm liquid slide down his throat. “Oh!” Bill gasps, pulling back. Tom’s come dribbles down his chin and he wipes at it, putting a hand on Tom’s cock and squeezing. Bill laughs, looking at the dick in his hand. “I’m going to eat it,” he comments, glancing up at Tom. Tom is gone again. Bill puts Tom’s cock back in his mouth and sucks hard.

“Bill!!”

Bill looks up. Tom’s eyes focus for one second. “Wha?”

“Get off my dick,” he scolds. “I’ve got nothing left.”

“Nuh uh.” Bill licks at the sensitive skin and Tom groans loudly, bucking his hips backward and sending Bill flying onto his stomach. “Tom!”

“Fuck,” Tom breathes, panting. It’s a pile of twin limbs on the bed, or it would be if it weren’t for Tom’s huge shirt. Bill rubs a hand over his face, it’s sticky with come and spit. Bill really wants his mouth on that dick again.

Bill rolls to his side, licking his lips and tugging at Tom’s shirt. “Tommmmm.”

Tom shakes his head. “No.”

“No what?” Bill lifts Tom’s shirt and gets a clue of what Tom’s naked body looks like. “Big shirt.”

Tom tries to wave him off, but Bill crawls up Tom’s body. His hard, moist cock drags along Tom’s thighs. “Bill, get that thing off me.”

Bill ignores the simple request and continues creeping up Tom’s body. He pokes his head under Tom’s shirt and slithers up, attempting to slip his arms through the sleeves. Tom squirms like crazy but Bill holds him still. “Tom, it’s big enough for both of us, jeez.”

Tom replies by ripping the shirt off the two of them and throwing it to the foot of the bed. Finally, Tom’s as naked as Bill. They stare for a second before grabbing at each other, play fighting down to the mattress.

“You said,” Bill gasps, “you said!”

“I said what?”

Bill lets out a low growl and scrambles on top of Tom. “I win.” He leans down and rubs his aching erection on Tom’s stomach. “Said you’d do anything.”

Tom blinks, and it looks like a huge effort on his part. “Eh?”

“I sucked your dick,” Bill announces, suddenly overcome by a fit of painful giggles. “And… and… and… I heard you fuck that girl, and it made my dick hard, so maybe if you did to me what you did to her… I could… It would…”

“What are you talking about?” Tom falls back and Bill gets on him.

“Meow,” Bill replies, bouncing on Tom’s thighs a bit. “And…” He takes Tom’s not-so-hard cock in his hands and begins rolling his fingers over it. “Purr.”

Tom’s eyes have gone all wide and innocent, like he just didn’t sit back and enjoy his little brother sucking his cock. “Bill, we can’t… I wouldn’t even know… Um.”

Bill smiles, still too high to see the consequences in putting Tom’s dick in his ass. “It isn’t very hard,” Bill says, staring down at Tom’s cock.

“You sucked it all out!” Tom throws a hand over his eyes and groans. “Careful.”

“Can it get hard again?” Bill wonders aloud. He prods the head and watches in delight as it twitches.

“Careful, careful,” Tom warns again. Bill rolls the foreskin back and Tom hisses. Out of nowhere, Tom bats Bill’s hand away and shoves Bill over onto his side. Bill lets himself be knocked around a bit, feeling bouncy and loose like jelly.

“You look mad,” Bill says. He only says that because he’s never seen what Tom looks like when he’s decided on fucking someone. “Meow?”

Tom tugs Bill’s head up by his little choker and kisses him forcefully on the mouth. Bill squirms away before Tom can do too much damage with his tongue.

“You’re my brother!” Bill says stupidly, hand to his mouth.

Tom looks exasperated, maybe a little angry even. “Come here, kitty,” he demands.

Bill shakes his head and backs up, naked as the day he was born, into the headboard.

“Don’t look all scandalized, you just sucked my cock,” Tom says. “Come here and give me a kiss and I’ll pet you.”

“Oh,” Bill murmurs, putting a hand over his lips. “You kissed me.”

“Ugh.” Tom pulls Bill forward and Bill flops like a rag doll, giggling as he flies. “Bill, cut it out!”

“I’m not doing anything!” Bill takes a deep breath and feels lightheaded all of a sudden. “Oh, Tomi.” He sees stars. “Oh, wow.”

“Bill,” Tom says in a voice that Bill has never heard before. “Get over here.”

“I’m over here,” Bill says, flashing in and out of consciousness. “Help.”

Tom wraps an arm around Bill’s middle and scoops him over, pressing their chests together. Bill’s head rolls back and Tom licks at Bill’s exposed neck. It’s long, and so is the lick, and when Tom’s tongue travels to Bill’s chin, Bill enters the realm of consciousness again.

“Tom,” he gasps. He looks down and sees Tom, looking at him like he’s after something. Bill feels like something. He tips his head forward and licks Tom’s lips, grinning. “Ha. Got you.”

“Getting you,” Tom replies, and he kisses Bill so hard that Bill feels his stomach flip. He’s kissed people before, but never like this. And never stoned. Tom forces his tongue inside and licks at the roof of Bill’s mouth. Bill sighs and becomes liquid in Tom’s arms. Tom tastes like, well, Tom.

“Do I taste like Bill?” Bill mumbles into Tom’s mouth, and he has to mumble because Tom’s biting down on his lower lip.

Tom flutters his eyelids open and their eyes connect for a heavy moment. Bill almost has to look away. Even through his haze, he feels deliciously naughty.

“Like pot,” Tom answers. “Kissing you is like taking another hit off the weed pipe.”

Bill finds this hysterical and propels himself from Tom, and becomes a giggling, writhing pile of limbs on the bed. Tom cracks a smile and hovers over him, dragging his rapidly hardening cock across Bill’s belly. Bill widens his eyes and finally, finally he realizes, “We’re fucking naked!!”

Tom shakes his head. “No,” he says, “we’re not.” And Bill believes him.

“We should be,” Bill moans. Tom has just bitten down on Bill’s neck, softly of course, but just hard enough to make Bill’s cock leap. “Tom, I need… I need…”

“I know.” Tom lies down on Bill and jerks his hips forward, their cocks mingling. “I’ve been really selfish.”

Bill laughs because he thinks Tom said “shell fish”, but then he stops laughing as he feels Tom’s hands on his ass. “Oh, mmm.”

“I’m gonna give you one long stroke,” Tom says. “Because you are such a good kitty.”

Bill suddenly remembers he’s a cat again. He arches and tries to look pretty for Tom, and Tom must think he’s a pretty kitty because he humps at Bill and slides his fingers down further. Right across Bill’s hole. Bill normally would not like this, he’s sure of it. He wouldn’t even put his finger there.

But Tom seems to want it, and so Bill does, too. Tom’s fingers are sweaty and big and the tips brush over and over Bill’s hole. Bill shivers, remembering his erection, starved for attention. The blood’s thrumming in his veins again and he writhes up and mewls as Tom’s fingers tickle his most private place.

“Want me to pet you here?” Tom asks, voice husky. Bill looks up at him and really sees for the first time just how handsome his brother is.

“You can do whatever you want,” Bill murmurs. He flicks his tongue out across Tom’s lip, the metal stud bumping between Tom’s lips.

Apparently what Tom wants is to sink the tip of his middle finger into Bill’s ass. It doesn’t hurt and Bill lets out a startled meow that makes Tom’s eyes flash dominance.

“Kitty likes that?” Tom grins and pushes his finger in deeper. “Sounds like kitty really likes that.”

Bill cries out and grabs at Tom’s shoulders. “Tom, do you know what goes on down there?!”

Tom ignores him and pulls his finger out. Bill sighs, maybe with relief, but then he squeaks again. Tom is pushing two fingers against his hole. “Not in,” Bill whispers. He’s sweating. “Not in, oh god, you can’t… seriously…”

“Yeah,” Tom says, grunting low in his throat. He slides two rough fingers in Bill’s ass. “If I’m gonna fuck you like that… you don’t have what girls have.”

Bill’s eyes widen. “Fuck…?”

“A hole’s a hole,” Tom murmurs. He pulls his fingers out, and then sneaks them back in again. “And you’re fucking beautiful.”

“Ah,” Bill moans. “Oh… What?”

Tom kisses Bill and continues exploring Bill on the inside. Bill squirms, helping to guide Tom’s fingers around. Where, he doesn’t know, but he can’t argue with Tom’s logic - a hole is a hole - and did Tom say he was fucking beautiful?

The fingers exit Bill again and Bill feels lost for a second. He panics and licks at Tom’s lips, chin, cheeks, nose, eyelids. Tom wipes at his face with an elbow and smirks at Bill. “Meow for me.”

Bill sits pretty for Tom, creating a delicate curve with his body. “Meow.”

“Louder.”

“Meow,” Bill moans.

“Can you feel this?” Tom has his fingers in Bill again, and he’s bending them in deliciously confusing ways. “You feel so hot in there…”

“Tom.” Bill clutches at Tom’s neck. “What are you touching?”

“Inside you,” Tom says. He slides his fingers out and Bill whines low in his throat. “I need to get you wet.”

“Just put them back in,” Bill says, eyes black. “Please. Pet me there.”

“You aren’t wet like a girl, but your so much hotter inside.” Tom isn’t paying attention to Bill’s pleading. “Bill, how can we get you wet?”

Bill grabs Tom’s wrist and turns his hand over. “Little kitten licks,” Bill says, “all of your fingers.” Bill licks Tom’s fingers from knuckle to tip, sucking them down his throat again and Bill hums, tasting himself.

Soon Tom’s had enough and tumbles Bill backward, his fingers slipping out, glistening. “Want me to pet you?” He wiggles his fingers between Bill’s legs. “Hmm?”

Bill nods.

“Kitty?”

“Meow,” Bill says. “Fuckin’ meow, Tomi.”

Tom smiles and forces three fingers in. It burns more than before even though his fingers are now wet. Bill arches up and squirms around, trying to get Tom to touch that lovely spot inside him. Bill is certain this is some sort of kitty spot. He’s certain he’s never had that spot before when he was just Bill.

“Want it?” Tom taunts.

Bill would feel ashamed of himself if he were less trashed; wriggling in front of Tom and begging for his brother’s talented fingers. “I want it, please.”

Tom curls his fingers and drags them up and down. It’s more of a satisfying scratch than a stroke and Bill cries out as his spot is touched.

“Oh,” Bill moans loudly. “Fuck… me, Tom, Tomi, on me. In me, fuck me.”

Tom tenses his fingers tightly and touches down directly on Bill’s spot. Bill lets out a scream, his legs flailing and his arms grabbing at whatever they can. He’s certain that he just came - no, maybe not, but he is certain he wants, needs that again. “This time with your dick,” Bill pleads.

“You want my dick?” Tom asks, and it’s a silly question. Bill nods so quickly.

“Is it hard again? It has to be hard again, I’ll suck it,” Bill says. “I’ll suck it for you any time. Oh, Tom…”

“Shut up,” Tom says, not unkindly. He kneels over Bill, jutting his pelvis out, and nudges Bill’s chin with his cock. “Suck.”

Bill pokes his tongue between his lips and gives Tom’s cock the tiniest, most delicate lap. “It’s hard again,” Bill murmurs. “So fucking hard, because of me?”

“’Cause of you,” Tom says. “’Cause of how fuckin’ beautiful you look.”

“Prettier than other kitties?”

Tom moans, Bill’s breath is right against his cock. “Yes.”

Bill feels proud through his haze, and he gives Tom’s cock one long lick. “I’m making it all wet, Tom. All wet, I know you like things wet.”

“God,” Tom groans. “Do you have any idea how you sound?”

“I sound like Bill.” Bill sits up and hugs Tom’s waist, kissing his hips. “Touch inside me.” He grabs Tom’s cock and squeezes. “With this.”

Tom grits his teeth and Bill can hear them grinding.

“Do it,” Bill says. “Just put it in there.”

“It’ll hurt,” is Tom’s wise response. “I need something wet.”

“My mouth.” Bill breathes wetly against Tom’s cock. Tom pushes his head away.

“Something like lotion.”

“Lotion!” Bill moves to the edge of the bed, confused with how to stand for a moment and tumbles to the floor.

“Bill?”

Bill crawls to the bathroom on all fours and finds his bottle of facial lotion on the counter. “Meow,” he says to the bottle and crawls back into the room.

Tom is sitting up on the bed, he has the pipe again and is taking a long toke. “Come here and take a hit.”

Bill tosses the lotion between Tom’s legs and sits on the floor, scratching at the bed spread. Tom rolls to his side and lets the pipe hang off the bed, right next to Bill’s open mouth. “Nip,” Bill says, and licks the tip of the pipe.

“Suck.”

“Meow.”

“Kitty… Be a good kitty.” Tom nudges Bill’s lips with the mouth of the pipe and Bill’s eyes go crossed for a second. “Bill…”

“I’m here.” Bill puts his hand over Tom’s and guides the pipe between his lips. Tom helps him take a long hit, and Bill sits back, breathing the smoke out. It burns his nose, and he flicks at the tip, wrinkling it.

“You’re a fuckin’ cute kitty,” Tom comments, his voice hoarse from the burning smoke. “Fuckin’ cute.”

“I know.” Bill raises himself on his knees and tries to climb onto the bed with Tom. “Help, I’m drowning.”

Tom puts a hand over Bill’s ass and hoists him up, connecting their lips as he does it. Bill’s lips are bruised pink, and so very wet. He feels warm in his belly, very happy, and extremely hungry. His stomach rumbles and he lets out a high pitched giggle. “Room service,” he quips.

“After I fuck you into the mattress,” Tom says. “After that, okay?” He pets Bill’s face affectionately and Bill mews happily.

“Can I have pizza?” Bill rolls over onto his stomach for Tom, and Tom runs his fingers down Bill’s spine. “And some cake.”

“Rice,” Tom says, picking up the bottle of lotion clumsily. “Doesn’t rice sound fucking amazing?”

Tom pokes Bill’s hole, and Bill squeaks. “Rice would taste funny and slosh around in my mouth,” Bill replies. “Like your dick. Yeah, maybe I’m just hungry for that.”

“Fuck.”

Bill looks over his shoulder. “And soup.”

Tom squirts some lotion into the palm of his hand.

“Is that going on your dick?” Bill asks. “Because then I won’t be able to lick it.”

“No more licking for you,” Tom says. “And it’s going inside you.”

“You’re so smart,” Bill coos. Tom smiles and covers his erection in the slippery substance. “You have a smart dick.”

“You have a dumb ass,” Tom says, and then slips two wet fingers into Bill. They slide in smoothly, Bill’s so relaxed he’ll accept anything right now.

“Mmm, my ass is dumb?” Bill pushes his butt back, Tom’s fingers sinking deep and hitting his special spot. He mewls and lets his head fall forward, his face smashing into the blankets.

“No, hot,” Tom says. “You’re squeezing my fingers. And delicious. I bet it’s delicious.” Now Tom’s belly is grumbling.

“Then eat it,” Bill breathes out.

Tom snorts and licks Bill’s ass, right down to where his fingers are buried inside. “Ech, lotion.” Tom keeps licking, keeps moving his fingers inside Bill.

“You’re licking my asshole!” Bill cries, but he likes it. He thinks. Tom pokes his tongue inside and Bill decides, yes, he likes it. A lot. “My ass is hot for you, Tomi,” Bill sighs, wiggling his rear end a little.

Tom laughs, a snuffling sound against Bill’s hole, and he leans back. “That is nothing like eating a girl out.”

“Ew, Tomi,” Bill sings. He bows his head down and pulls his knees in. “You’re eating me out.”

“Tastes good,” Tom rasps, and he’s back to sucking Bill’s hole. “Tastes fuckin’ amazing.”

“So do you,” Bill mumbles, his face buried in the mattress. “Tomi…” He looks over his shoulder. Tom is ravaging his hole. “Never mind.”

“Uh?”

“Oh…”

Tom pulls back and blows on the bottom of Bill’s spine. “We doing this?”

“Your dick,” Bill says firmly, “needs to go in my ass.”

“It will.” Tom gives his cock one last lotion rub. “Kitty.”

“Can I be Bill again? Bill wants your dick, not the kitty.”

Tom raises his eyebrows. “Kitty doesn’t want this?”

“Kitty has left the building,” Bill replies. He feels so very heavy, like he might fall through the floor.

“Mmm, can kitty play again sometime?” Tom asks. Bill nods and Tom bumps his cock against Bill’s ass. “On your hands and knees.”

Bill complies, rolling his hips, not knowing he no longer needs to entice Tom. Tom is enticed. Tom is beyond enticed. He’s two seconds away from just coming on Bill’s ass if he isn’t careful.

“Do it,” Bill says. “Fuck Bill.”

“I don’t think you know what you’re asking for,” Tom says. He runs his cock down Bill’s crease and bumps his entrance. “Do you?”

“I know,” Bill says. “Do it.”

“It’s gonna be really big in there, you’re soooo small,” Tom says. His voice is dark again, it’s like he’s making fun of Bill and Bill likes it.

“I’m fucking small, your penis is huge, we all get it,” Bill replies, smiling and feeling silly. He pushes his ass back against Tom and hears a groan. “Like that?”

He feels Tom spreading the crease in his ass. “Just like that… You look good from here. Real good.”

“Good enough to fuck?”

“The fuckin’ best,” Tom murmurs. He holds Bill’s ass spread and massages the hole with his thumbs. “You have to be ready. Promise me. Ready?”

Bill rocks back and forth a few times. “Ready. Ready. Ready.”

Tom lines his cock up with Bill’s hole and pushes against it. They both groan and gasp and hiss, and Bill almost collapses. He grits his teeth and feels Tom’s cock entering him, slowly. Bill wishes it could be faster but he’s still lucid enough to know that much would be stupid.

Bill ducks his head and takes deep breaths. His head is swimming, it feels like a marshmallow. A pleasant one. He’s floating on a cloud and Tom’s dick is forcing itself into his ass. “Careful,” Bill says. “I’ll fall off.”

“What?” Tom grips Bill’s hips and grunts softly as he pushes in more. “Feel that?”

Of course Bill can feel that. He nods, “It’s… not wet,” he manages, tears pricking at his eyes. “And it’s… not good.”

“It’s good,” Tom insists. “It’s good.”

“Maybe,” Bill breathes, his knuckles white as he makes two tight fists. “Oh… Faster.”

Tom swats Bill’s ass cheek. “Bad kitty.”

“M’not a kitty,” Bill says, “Is it in there?”

“Can’t you feel it?” Tom moves inside him and Bill gasps out at the stinging sensation that courses through his body.

“Owwwwwwww, fuck. Tom, it sort of hurts.” Not sort of. It hurts like fuck. “Hurry up and do it.”

Tom smacks Bill’s ass again. “Bad kitty. Bill. Bad Bill.”

“M’not Bill,” Bill says through clenched teeth. His cock is twitching. He grabs it and holds it, gently squeezing. “Pretend I’m that girl. The one I… oh… listened in on.”

“No,” Tom says instantly. “You’re better than she was.” He grunts and jerks forward, almost fully in there. “Hold… still.”

“Not going anywhere.” Bill is jerking himself off, furious movements with his hand up and down his cock. He gathers some moisture in his palm and smears it on Tom’s arm. “Here.”

“Thanks,” Tom says absent mindedly. He’s in seventh heaven now, if seventh heaven is Bill’s ass. He moves back and forth, dragging his cock roughly inside Bill. Bill is whimpering, babbling little nothings that Tom isn’t meant to understand.

“It feels… so… good… now,” Bill moans out. “Oh, do it, Tomi.”

The pot has reached its full potential. Tom is fucking Bill in the ass and no one’s crying.

Tom does it well, his hips rocking, his cock hitting Bill just right. Maybe if they weren’t so high this wouldn’t be nearly as good. But it doesn’t matter, Bill’s jerking himself off, sweating and scrunching his face up attractively, as only Bill can do.

“Fuck yes,” Tom hisses. “You’re going to make me come, Bill.”

“Not yet, uh, mmm, you got to come already,” Bill whines out. “You need, you need… ah! You need to make me come first. “

Tom seems to take this seriously, jerking Bill up so that Bill’s back is flush with his chest. The angle is making Tom’s cock ride directly over Bill’s prostate.

Bill arches back, shivers in delight as Tom’s hands smooth down his belly and holds his cock.

“Fuck it while I fuck you,” Tom says. Bill jerks forward, fucking Tom’s fist.

“Tell me I’m a good, good kitty.”

Tom just grunts in reply, thrusting his hips back and forth, forcing their bodies together and apart in a delicious rhythm. Bill turns his head and nips at Tom’s chin. “Tom… Tell me. I need to know.”

“Good,” Tom murmurs, squeezing Bill’s cock as Bill thrusts into his hand. “Kitty.”

“Good good?”

“Fucking…” Tom seems to lose himself for a moment. His hand goes limp around Bill’s cock and he pauses in his movements. “Fucking good kitty, hot. Bill.”

“Mm?” Bill works his hips, helping Tom fuck him. It’s so moist and hot, and he can feel how tight his heat is around Tom’s cock. “Take it, Tom. Get me off, please.”

“Fuck, Bill,” Tom breathes, right on the back of Bill’s neck. He sucks at the skin there and Bill feels a shiver run down his whole, trembling body. “Are you close?”

Bill smiles happily and drapes himself backward, against Tom. “Tomi… You’re so good…”

“Are you?”

“I’m…” Bill lets out a long breath and quakes before coming in Tom’s hand. He cries out and doubles over, almost unseating himself from Tom’s cock. Tom grabs Bill’s hips, pulling him forward, smearing the warm come all over Bill’s sides.

“Fuck,” Bill whispers. He’s in a daze, and he knows his ass hurts. “Tom, hurry. That’s too much.”

“Not enough,” Tom groans out. He slams forward three more times, sending Bill into the headboard, holding on for dear life.

“Ow, ow, ow!” Bill just lets Tom give it to him.

“Okay, I’m… I’m…” Tom shudders hard.

“Coming in the kitty?” Bill asks, voice muffled in the blankets.

“No.” Tom grunts and stiffens, pulling out of Bill suddenly and letting go of his load all over Bill’s back. “I’m coming on the fucking kitty.”

He slumps over, smearing the come further up Bill’s back.

“You’re crushing me, you fat… Tom,” Bill says. He rolls over and tries to push Tom off him, but Tom holds tight.

“Gonna pass out,” Tom breathes. “Stay. Mmm.”

“All sticky,” Bill yawns. He settles down, wraps his arms around Tom’s middle. “My ass hurts.”

Tom kisses his throat. “That’s because I put my dick in you.”

Bill’s toes curl. “Yeah.” They snuggle down deeper together, the porn’s credits rolling in the background, the blankets a mess, half a bag of weed spilled out on the floor.

Maybe they’ll fall asleep.

Bill’s stomach growls.

Maybe not.

**

Bill’s irritated. He cracks an eye open and there’s heavy morning sunlight pouring in through the window.

“Fuck,” he croaks, and it really is a croak. His throat is burning and he feels like he’s swallowing a sock. “Ungh. Thwock. Um.”

He tries to sit up, and realizes he’s tangled. Tangled in someone else.

Tangled up in Tom.

“Oh muh gaw,” Bill lisps out, rubbing his face. His hair is pressed flat against his forehead, and he’s naked in bed with his brother. Bill lifts the blankets.

Tom is naked, too.

“Fuhhh,” Bill moans. He nudges Tom, still rubbing his face and throat. “Jeethus.”

Tom rolls over and mumbles, “Turly.”

“Tommbuh?”

“Too… early.”

Bill sits up fast, tossing his brother’s sweetly affectionate hold off him. “Tomf!!” Bill’s mouth isn’t working.

Tom opens his eyes and stares up at Bill. “What’d we do?”

“I doh know!” Bill wants to get up, but in the honest morning light, he’s very modest, and that does not mix with being naked. His eyes search the room. His pants and shirt are flung over a desk lamp. “How??”

Tom groans and holds up a small plastic bag, half full of pot. It’s then that Bill notices there are plates and plates of food surrounding them on the floor. Not to mention quite a few bottles of beer.

Bill shakes himself out of it, clearing his throat. “Fuck you, Tom! I am never drinking beer, smoking pot, watching porn, and having sex with you again!”

Both of their stomachs growl and Tom cracks a grin, reaching over to Bill and picking a French fry off his belly. He smugly slips it into his mouth, chewing happily. “Okay, I promise never to make you watch bad porn with me. How’s that?”

“And no beer,” Bill says sternly. “Or pot. My voice is a mess.”

“What about the sex?”

Bill wipes at some dried come on his stomach. “Well, only if you pet me first, of course.”

“Of course.”

Don't Tell Mom (3/?)

Sun, 14 Oct 2007 04:55:55 GMT

Title: Don't Tell Mom (3/?)
Previous Chapters: Here
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17 (eventually)
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: What Mom doesn't know won't kill her.

Tom rolled over, unable to sleep. He was alone in his bed, and he knew it was silly, but he just couldn’t sleep without Bill. He wasn’t scared or anything, he just felt restless and uneasy. Usually at this point, Bill was jammed into his side, breathing in his face and snoring.

Why hadn’t Bill come to him? Bill almost always did, unless their mother was acting weird again. Some days she would just have that look on her face and Bill wouldn’t get within five feet of Tom. But their mother hadn’t even been home all day.

Tom frowned and punched at his pillow. He needed Bill to sleep.

Just as he was rolling over to give sleep another try, the door creaked open. “Bill?”

“Tom?”

Tom grinned into the darkness. “Where were you?”

“Um.” Tom heard the door shut, and then he heard feet shuffling across the hard wood floor. “I can’t find a path, Tom, your floor is so messy.”

Tom held the blankets up and waited for Bill to slide in. “Come in.”

He could hear Bill breathing, standing right next to the bed. “Sorry I didn’t come in sooner.”

“Is Mom home or something?”

“No. I don’t think so.” Bill gingerly sat down on the mattress next to Tom. “Are you mad at me?”

“Why?”

“Because I took so long.”

“No way,” Tom said. “Just… sometimes you come in late. Why?”

Bill curled his feet up under him on the bed, still not slipping in beside Tom. “Um,” Bill said softly. “It’s sort of weird.”

“Weird how?” Tom was beginning to feel a bit uncomfortable. He didn’t like that Bill was keeping something from him. “What, Bill?” Tom scooted forward and put a hand on Bill’s cheek. It was burning.

“I feel dumb telling you,” was Bill’s reply. He leaned his face into Tom’s hand. “I just… feel sort of weird sometimes.”

Tom didn’t understand. “But, weird how?”

“Like, um.” Bill turned away from Tom.

“Bill?” Tom stroked his hand down Bill’s back and Bill shivered.

“That,” Bill said, his voice a little uneasy. “Stuff like that. It makes me, um, it… hard.”

“Hard?” Tom crawled out from under the blankets and knelt beside Bill.

“My...” Bill ducked his head into Tom’s neck. “Down there. It gets hard. You know? I don’t understand and then I feel like I’m going to do something bad. Something Mom wouldn’t like.”

Tom could feel all the words against his neck and he wrapped his arms around Bill. “Your dick gets hard?” He laughed a little.

“It’s not funny,” Bill said, pulling away.

“No, no,” Tom said, grabbing at Bill’s shoulders. “Me too. It happens to me, too. All the time when you’re around.”

“What does that mean?” Bill asked. He shifted closer to Tom. “It happens when we kiss and at night. And um, even when I think about kissing you.”

“It’s normal, I think,” Tom said. “It happens in movies, and we just love each other, right?”

Bill nodded.

“So, it’s okay, then.” Tom was sure of it.

“But…” Bill trailed off. “Sometimes it almost hurts and I want to… rub it against you when we’re sleeping. What am I supposed to do about it? ”

Tom smiled, his belly beginning to ache pleasantly. “I think I’m supposed to do something about it.”

Bill let out a long, hot breath and Tom felt it against his skin. “What if… you did do something about it? What would you do?”

“Is it hard right now?”

“It’s starting to.”

Tom nodded. “Mine has been for a while.”

Bill made a small whining sound and trembled slightly against Tom. “Show me yours, I want to see yours.”

“Okay.”

“I can’t see anything, it’s too dark.”

“So turn on the light.”

Bill leaned over and flicked the small lamp on beside the bed. A dull light poured over both of them, and they smiled. Bill’s cheeks were pink, his hands twisted together. “Go on,” he whispered.

Tom had no problem with sliding his pajama pants down his hips and lying back, completely exposed. Bill gasped and his initial reaction was to reach for it carefully. His knuckles brushed Tom’s erection and they both groaned softly.

“Now you,” Tom said, shuddering. Bill was grazing the back of his hand delicately against him.

“I can’t with the light on.”

“Not fair, I need to see you,” Tom said, frowning.

“Okay… but…” Bill bit his lip. “After you see it, we need to turn the lights off. I like being with you better when the lights are off.”

Tom nodded, and Bill wiggled out of his baggy pajama bottoms. He was blushing heavily and his hands shook, but finally, he had tugged his pants down and dropped them on the floor. Tom stared at Bill’s arousal, eyes wide.

“I love it,” was all Tom could think to say. He blushed at his own words and touched Bill’s thigh first. “I love that.”

Bill grinned. “I love yours.”

“They look the same.”

“Yours is bigger.”

Tom laughed. “Thanks.” He moved his fingers up Bill’s thigh, resting them where Bill’s thighs met his hips. “What do you want to do?”

Bill was still staring at Tom’s cock. “I want you to make the ache go away.”

“Can I do it with the lights on?” Tom asked, smiling.

Bill squirmed and covered his growing erection with his hands. “Tomi…”

“Oh, fine,” Tom huffed. He rolled over and flicked off the lamp, the room falling into darkness. He was about to whine about it when he suddenly got an armful of Bill. “Umph.”

“Can you rub it?” Bill sounded breathless, his voice shaking.

Tom rubbed his hands down Bill’s back. “Yeah, I can.” He pulled Bill closer, shoving the sheets down to their feet. The first time their naked hips and legs touched, they both squeaked.

“Ohhh,” Bill moaned. “What are you gonna do?”

Tom did what felt natural. He quickly rolled Bill under him. Bill gasped in surprise, but loved the feel of Tom pressing down into him.

“We’re gonna have sex,” Tom said. He dipped his head and kissed Bill wetly on the mouth.

“Sex?” Bill asked, his voice wavering.

“Yeah, movie sex,” Tom said. “You know, not real but…” Tom grinded down into Bill, their cocks nudging together hard. “Fuck.”

“Oh my god,” Bill moaned out. “What’s movie sex?”

“You know when they have sex in movies, it isn’t real,” Tom said, moving his body away from Bill’s. Bill whined and tried pulling back down.

“More, Tomi, more,” he said. “I want you to rub more.”

Tom eased back down and glided their bodies together. “Ugh, Bill, you’re getting… wet.”

Bill made a strangled noise in the back of his throat. “Sorry, it just does that sometimes.”

Tom laughed softly. “Is it because you like me?”

“I don’t know…” Bill sighed loudly and drew up his knees. He linked his legs around Tom’s waist and felt Tom’s hardness drag across his own. “Why does that… feel so good?”

Tom shrugged and kept grinding his cock down into Bill. “Because it’s you.”

“Me?”

“Bill,” Tom said, cupping the side of his brother’s face with a hand.

“This can’t be okay.” Bill arched his back, his cock rubbing forcefully against Tom’s. “This feels too good, it’s gotta be bad.”

“Why?”

“Because whenever something feels good… especially with you… it’s really bad,” Bill replied softly. He hugged Tom close to him and breathed in sharply. “Don’t let this be bad.”

“Just don’t tell,” Tom said easily, smiling against Bill’s skin. “Move up a little.”

Bill moved up, and they both moaned loudly. Bill bit back his moan and squeaked. “What if Mom and Gordon are home?”

“They aren’t.”

“Tomi, touch it. Don’t stop what you’re doing but please… touch it. Touch it all over, it aches.”

Tom’s belly flared with heat, and he kissed Bill as he slid his hand down between them. “I hope this is okay,” he said, wrapping his hand around Bill’s full erection. Bill moaned immediately and Tom could feel the wetness at the tip.

“Would, uh, would Mom be really mad?” Bill gasped out.

Tom stroked him once, still moving against him. “I dunno,” Tom said, out of breath. Bill’s naked body felt so good against his cock. He couldn’t rub his erection against Bill’s anymore, but he loved the feel of Bill’s stomach and hip. Bill’s skin was so smooth and hot, he couldn’t stop himself from moving. Sometimes he would rub up against his mattress at night until he couldn’t take it anymore, but this was so much better.

Bill was writhing under him, shaking his head back and forth. “Mom hates when we kiss,” Bill said, barely able to get the words out. “She wouldn’t, uh, like this. Tomi, mmm.”

Tom wasn’t listening anymore. He didn’t care if their Mom knew, she didn’t understand them. She didn’t know how Tom felt, how Bill felt. She didn’t understand that they were in love. She wouldn’t even believe it.

“Shh,” Tom said right into Bill’s ear. “She’ll never know.” He kissed Bill’s earlobe and then paused. “I mean, do you want me to stop?”

Bill felt panicked for a moment. He grabbed Tom, pulling him closer, pressing his hands flat against Tom’s back. “Tomi, no. No. I don’t care, either. I love you, I don’t care. I need you so bad. I can‘t stop, even if you can.”

They moved together harshly. “Bill, you’re such an idiot,” Tom breathed. “Of course I can’t stop.”

“I’m all wet,” Bill replied, a grin forming on his lips. “You got me all wet and I think your wet is getting on me, too.”

“I’m gonna explode,” Tom said. He licked Bill’s lips and Bill cried out, going rigid and coming on Tom’s stomach. Tom stared, wide eyed, down at his brother and pulled back. “Shit, shit, are you okay?”

“I did it on you, I’m sorry,” Bill whispered, his body going limp. He was trembling under Tom. “Keep going, keep going.”

“Are you sure?”

“I want you to do that on me, can you?”

Tom slid his hand around the wetness between them and felt himself jerk forward against Bill. “Yeah, ugh, soon,” he grunted, burying his face in Bill’s neck.

“You feel so warm,” Bill said softly, kneading Tom’s back with his knuckles. “Movie sex is so good.”

“Mm,” Tom murmured. He felt Bill’s hand wrap around his cock and he moaned, almost biting Bill’s neck. Bill squeezed Tom’s erection and almost hurt him, he was gripping it so hard. “Ow.”

“Sorry,” Bill said, easing up and dragging his hand down Tom’s cock. He pinched the wet tip and Tom gasped loudly. “Oh my god.”

Bill felt Tom jerk against him and then, a burst of wetness between them. Tom and Bill looked at each other, speechless. All Tom knew to do was kiss Bill, and kiss him as well as he knew how. He licked Bill’s lips, lapped into his mouth, and tickled the backs of his teeth just how Bill liked. When he pulled back they were panting even harder.

“Tom, I love you,” Bill said, dragging his fingers through the mess between them. “You make me feel so… funny.”

“Horny,” Tom corrected.

Bill laughed. “Yeah, that’s it. Can we do this more?”

Tom poked Bill’s wet stomach. “Now?”

Bill flushed and giggled. “Well… I meant, you know, some other time. But…”

Tom pressed down into Bill, feeling the excitement rise in his belly again. “You’re making it hard again, Bill.”

Bill’s eyes went wide and he arched up, rubbed against Tom like a slinky cat. “Does this make it hard?” He touched the tip of Tom’s hardening cock.

Tom gasped. “That is a good spot.”

“It’s so wet.” That came out as a whisper against Tom’s lips. “Tom, you love me still?”

Tom kissed Bill. “I love you more.”

“How?”

“When you touch me,” Tom said, not really understanding how he felt. Coming with Bill had made the ache in his groin go away, but made the ache in his heart worse. He knew that it meant he loved Bill, but what he didn’t understand was why it hurt, too.

“Tom,” Bill said, breaking Tom out of his thoughts.

“Hmm?”

Bill thrust his hips up, his cock hard against Tom’s stomach. “Me too.”

Tom smiled, the hurt and the ache was so worth it as long as he had Bill.

**

Bill was lying on his stomach on the floor in the living room a week later, messing with his French homework. He was behind in the class since they’d been absent frequently. Some important executives had seen their band, so Bill and Tom had been spending a lot of time in the city with their band mates, Georg and Gustav. That particular afternoon, the whole band was over at his house. They were having a casual meeting about their progress.

“I think we should change our band name,” Georg said, eating a handful of chips that Simone had provided for the boys. “Devilish is alright, but…”

“Agreed,” Tom said. He sat down on the floor next to Bill, and opened a soda. Bill smiled at his brother and grabbed at the can. “Bill, no.”

Bill sighed, turning back to his homework. “God, I did your French, you might as well give me something for it.”

“I’ll give you something French,” Tom said softly.

Bill squeaked and ducked his head down.

“If not Devilish, then what?” Gustav, their drummer, said. “I’ve always hated that name, by the way.”

“I hate your name,” Georg joked. “What if we were called… Grease Mothers?”

They all stared at him.

Georg shrugged. “I don’t see anyone else coming up with anything.”

“I write the songs, I’m not coming up with our name,” Bill spoke up.

“You probably will, though,” Tom told him, grinning. Bill stuck his tongue out at Tom and rolled onto his lap.

“Give me your soda,” Bill whined. Tom laughed and tried shoving Bill off. “I don’t have germs.”

“You look like you have germs,” Georg said, laughing.

Bill pouted and Tom brushed Bill’s crazy, unruly hair from his forehead. “It just freaks me out,” Tom said. Bill sighed and rolled off Tom’s lap.

“Fiiiine.” Bill sat up, biting at his lip. “What about… ‘Bill’.”

“For what?” Gustav asked. “Our band name?”

Bill grinned. “Yeah, since I do everything.”

Gustav flipped Bill off. “I keep the beat, let’s call the band ‘Gustav’.”

“’Georg: and those two other guys’,” Georg suggested, raising his glass of soda.

“Hey, there are three other guys,” Tom said.

“Bill’s not a guy,” Georg shot back.

Bill crossed his arms and stuck his tongue out Georg. “Asshole.”

“Language, boys,” Simone said, walking into the room with an amused smile on her face. “Georg, your mother’s here for you and Gustav.”

“Ugh, do you have to go?” Tom said. “We didn’t get anything done. They could spend the night.”

“It’s a school night,” Simone said sternly.

“Mo-om,” Bill and Tom said in unison.

“Thanks, Mrs. T,” Georg said to Simone as he and Gustav got up. They started walking to the door.

“Good night, children,” Gustav told the twins.

“Fuck you,” Tom said good naturedly.

“Tom!” Simone scolded, rolling her eyes. “Tell your mother hello,” she said to Georg. They all said goodbye, and Simone wandered back into the kitchen, leaving the twins in the living room.

“That sucked,” Bill said, closing his French book. “We really didn’t get anything done.”

Tom shrugged and lay down on his back, staring at the ceiling. “We never do.”

“Maybe at the next Grease Mothers practice.”

They both laughed. Tom touched Bill’s face and smiled. “Glad it’s just us now,” he whispered.

Bill nodded, propping himself up on his elbows. “Andreas wanted to come over tonight. I might call and cancel.”

“It’s a school night,” Tom said in a mocking tone, rolling his eyes much like his mother did. “Yeah, we’ll see him soon.”

“In school tomorrow.”

“School,” Tom repeated, making a face. “I’m so done with school.”

“School’s done with you.” Bill grinned. “And me.”

“We’re too big for school,” Tom said, putting his hands behind his head. “We outgrew that place.”

“I outgrew you.”

Tom turned his head and squinted at Bill. “Nuh uh. You just stand up straighter.”

Bill stood up and tugged on Tom to stand up, too. “Stand next to me. I’m taller than you, I know it.”

“This is dumb,” Tom groaned. Bill was somehow taller, and he didn’t want to admit it. “Okay, you win. Happy?”

“No,” Bill said quietly. “Because… look.” He pointed down, toward his groin. There was a bulge forming.

“How long have you been…” Tom trailed off, staring. He felt himself harden instantly. “Oh god.”

Bill grabbed Tom’s hand and squeezed. “Wish it was later,” he said, eyes flashing.

Tom nodded, his mouth was hanging open. “Yeah?”

“I want to lick it,” Bill whispered. Both their bellies turned with excitement. “Do you want me to lick yours?”

“Would you?” Tom had never even thought about Bill’s mouth on his cock, but now, it seemed like the best idea in the world.

“Yeah.”

“Shit.”

Bill raised his eyebrows and stepped toward Tom.

In the kitchen, Simone was wiping down the counter. She was on the phone with Gordon.

“Yes,” she said, cradling the phone between her shoulder and ear. “You’ll be home soon, though, right?… Alright… I’ll make the boys something small now, and you and I can find something to eat later… Alright… I love you, bye.”

She hung up the phone and dropped the dishtowel. She’d have to ask the boys what they’d want because Bill could be one hell of a picky eater.

Maybe they wouldn’t mind leftover lasagna. With that on her mind, she walked into the living room, hoping her sons wouldn’t be too difficult. She was exhausted.

“Boys…” She felt like the wind had been knocked out of her the moment she entered the room. Tom had Bill up against the wall near the television, his hands holding Bill tightly. Their lips were connected, and not in the soft, chaste way she’d seen them kiss before. Tom was eagerly pressing his lips to Bill’s, opening his brother’s mouth with deep, hungry laps. And Bill wasn’t struggling to get out of Tom’s grasp, his eyes were closed and he was making soft, satisfied noises with each wet kiss.

Simone felt sick. She backed out of the room as fast she could, leaning against the counter heavily. What had she just seen?

“Oh God,” she whispered to herself. “How did this happen?”

In the living room, Bill pulled away from Tom, grinning and breathless. “Tomi,” he whispered. “That was bad.”

“It was bad?” Tom asked, insulted.

“No, I mean… We shouldn’t do that stuff down here,” Bill replied, laughing. “And I almost ate you, I’m really hungry.”

Tom smiled and bit Bill’s shoulder playfully. Bill squealed and ducked away, grinning. “I got you,” Tom said shyly.

Bill nudged Tom. “I’m going to see what’s for dinner.”

“I have to… go to the bathroom,” Tom mumbled, backing away.

“Loser,” Bill said, wincing at his own erection. “Shit.” He wandered into the kitchen and saw his mother. She was sitting at the table, and she looked completely miserable. “Mom?”

Simone looked up, shocked to see Bill. “Oh, Bill.”

Bill bit his lip, something was wrong. “Am I in trouble? I’m calling Andreas to tell him not to come over, don’t worry.”

“Come sit.”

“Okay,” Bill said nervously. He sat down at the table, across from his mother. “What’s the matter?”

Simone sighed, her hands clenched together in worry. She looked Bill over, his face was still flushed, and his lips were bruised pink and wet. “Bill… Have you and Tom been getting along? Is he nice to you? Does he treat you okay?”

Bill nodded slowly. “Of course he does… Why wouldn’t he?”

“Bill.”

“We get along fine.”

“Bill, tell me the truth,” Simone said firmly. “Does Tom make you… do things? Does he touch you in places you don’t want him to?”

“What?” Bill’s stomach dropped out from under him. “Why would you say… What??”

“Calm down, honey,” Simone said wearily. “I just need to know what’s going on.”

“Nothing’s going on,” Bill said quickly. “Nothing.”

Simone sighed. Bill looked like he was going to start crying. Simone put a hand on his shoulder but he shrugged it off. “Okay, Bill,” she said. “I’m going to warm up lasagna for dinner, is that okay?”

Bill nodded blankly and stood. “I’m going to do some homework,” he said. He didn’t wait for a response from his mother, just exited the kitchen, his head down.

**

Tom knocked on Bill’s door, feeling silly for doing it, but doing it anyway. Bill had been strangely quiet the whole night; he wouldn’t even look at Tom during dinner. And their mother had been much the same. She’d disappeared during dinner and was even acting strange around Gordon when he came home later.

He needed to know what was going on.

“What?” Bill called out, his voice muffled by the closed door.

Tom pushed the door open slightly and saw Bill curled up on his bed. “Bill? Are you okay?” Bill didn’t respond and Tom came closer. “Are you mad at me?”

“No,” Bill said. “It’s just…”

Simone popped her head in, a strained look on her face. “Tom, are you ready for bed?”

Bill rolled over, away from Tom and his mother. “Um, I guess,” he said.

“I need to talk to you for a second, alone,” she said. Tom frowned, what had he done now?

“Fine,” he said, and followed his mother out of the room. “Night, Bill.” Once in his room, Simone shut the door and sat on Tom’s bed. Tom sat awkwardly beside her. “Mom?”

“Tom.” She was wringing her hands together, not looking at Tom. “I saw you kissing Bill today.”

Tom felt like he’d been slapped. He stared down at the floor. “So?”

“So?” Simone sounded angry now. “You know you’re not supposed to do that. You know.” Tom just grunted in response. “What else have you been doing? I need to know.”

“Um.”

“Are you making him do this?” Simone grabbed him hard, almost shaking him. “Tom?”

“Of course not,” Tom said, tears forming in his eyes. “What are you talking about?”

“Tom, why?”

“It was stupid,” Tom said, trying to take the emotion out of his voice. “It was a stupid dare.”

Simone shook her head. “A dare? Tom, tell me the truth.”

“It was! It was this stupid dare Georg made me do,” Tom lied. “He dared me to kiss someone, and uh, I was too embarrassed, so I asked Bill. I knew it was stupid. I’m sorry.”

“So, you’re telling me this is it?” Simone didn’t look convinced. “You guys never sleep together or anything? This is it?”

“Yes, just this once,” Tom said. “I don’t… we don’t…” He wiped at his eyes. “Please believe me.”

Simone’s frown softened and she pulled Tom to her. “Tom, I’m so worried for you two.”

“Don’t be, we’re fine,” Tom said. “I’ll never do it again.”

“Because you know it’s wrong, Tom. Right?”

Tom’s heart broke. “Yeah, I know. I would never…”

“It’s so very wrong to do,” Simone said. “He’s your brother.”

“I know, I know,” Tom said. He began sniffling a little.

“Don’t be upset,” Simone said, squeezing Tom in a hug. “I’m not mad at you. You know that.”

“No.”

Simone was at a loss. She simply hugged Tom tighter. Normally Tom didn’t let her be affectionate with him. “Tom, it will be okay. You know I love that you two are so close. You just need to figure out what type of love is right for you.”

“It’s nothing,” Tom said. “And it won’t happen again, Mom. I promise.”

“Can you promise?”

“Yes,” Tom said very quietly. “I can.”

“I love you,” Simone murmured, kissing Tom’s forehead. “I’m just… looking out for you.”

“I know.”

Simone waited to see if Tom would return the sentiment, but he just stared at the floor blankly. Simone sighed, getting up and walking out of the room. She glanced at Bill’s door. It was firmly shut.

She walked down the stairs and tried not to think about the twins. But she knew she wouldn’t be able to stop thinking about it, and she knew she could never even tell Gordon.

No one could know.

**

A couple of hours later, Bill dared to creep out of his bedroom. He had been sitting in the dark in his room, anxiously waiting for the right time to go and see Tom. He had to see him. He padded across the hall in bare feet, stepping on the bottoms of his pajama pants.

“Tom?” he whispered when he got to his brother’s door. He remembered when it used to be his door, too. He pushed the door open and peeked his head in. “Tom?”

Tom was curled up in a ball in his bed, away from Bill. “What.”

Bill frowned; Tom rarely sounded so distant. He moved over to the bed and crawled in, next to Tom. Tom tensed, and Bill touched his shoulder gently. “Tom.”

Tom drew himself in more, hunching his shoulders.

“Tomi,” Bill said. “What did Mom say to you? Did she ask you, too?”

Tom turned over and looked at Bill. “She doesn’t want us to be together, Bill. I don’t know what to do.”

Bill’s eyes adjusted to the dark, and he saw that Tom’s cheeks were streaked with tears, and his eyes were puffy. “What else?” Bill whispered.

“I think she knows,” Tom said miserably. “She said it was wrong.”

Bill grew quiet for a few moments, his hand rested lightly on Tom’s shoulder. “Is it?”

Tom rolled to his back and stared up at the ceiling. “It must be. I mean, have you thought about it?”

Bill took a deep breath. “Because you’re my brother?”

“Yeah,” Tom said. “Mom doesn’t understand. No one will understand.”

Bill felt like he knew where this was going. “Tomi, do you want to… stop?”

Tom bolted up and grabbed Bill’s shoulders hard, squeezing him against his chest. “What are you talking about? No. God, Bill. I don’t want to stop.”

Bill breathed an enormous sigh of relief and hugged Tom back. “What do we do?”

“We be careful,” Tom said. “No one can ever know if we want to be together.”

“But how?” Bill was beginning to sniffle, clutching tight to Tom.

“I don’t know, I don’t know,” Tom said. “I can’t be without you.” Tom kissed Bill’s neck, forcing him back to the mattress. “I need this.”

“It’s so wrong,” Bill said, returning the kisses and pushing against Tom. “Oh god, I don’t care.”

“It’ll be okay,” Tom whispered. “You know it will be okay.”

Bill nodded and their lips connected. Tom was hovering over Bill, moving against him, wiping away some tears that were spilling down Bill’s cheeks. Bill made little breathy sounds into Tom’s skin and hugged him so tightly, so desperately, that they both melded into each other.

“Don’t leave me,” Bill said quietly, sniffling. “You can’t leave me, okay?

Tom nodded. “Oh god, of course not, Bill. Even if… fuckin’… I don’t know. Even if Mom busted in right now, I’d fight for you.”

Bill smiled despite it all and nodded. “Yes… Okay.”

They kissed and moved with each other, hands joined. Both their hearts felt heavy and broken, and the ache was back in their bellies.

“We can’t tell Mom,” Tom said, right into Bill’s ear as they both peeled their shirts off.

“No,” Bill moaned softly. Tom tugged Bill’s pants down his thighs and tossed them off the bed. Bill gasped and slid his fingers under the waist of Tom’s pants, pulling them down. Their bare skin collided and they smiled against each other’s lips.

“She won’t know, we’ll be careful,” Tom was saying. “I love you, don’t tell Mom.”

“I love you, oh,” Bill sighed, their naked bodies lining together. “Oh, Tom…”

Tom smiled down at Bill and they rubbed together in the dark, all shame and guilt forgotten.

**

Bill lay awake the next morning, pressed against his brother. They were still naked from the night before, and Bill had a panicked feeling in his belly. It was only seven in the morning, but he knew he had to get his clothes on and go back to his room.

“Tomi,” he whispered, nudging his brother. “Tom…”

Tom rolled over and grunted, cracking an eye open. “You’re still here,” he said, his voice thick with sleep.

Bill nodded. “I have to go.”

“I know.”

“But I wanted to wait until you woke up,” Bill said. “Just to make sure you still… felt the same way this morning.”

Tom yawned, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. “What do you mean?”

“Do you still want to be with me?”

Tom wrapped an arm around Bill. “Of course. Of course.” He pulled Bill to him and nuzzled into his neck. “But we have to be careful, you shouldn’t be here.”

“But I am,” Bill said, with a very small smile.

Tom kissed his neck. “I have an idea,” he said. “But it’s sort of dumb and you can’t get mad.”

“What is it?”

“Okay… Well…”

“Just say it.”

“We need to get girlfriends,” Tom said quietly. Bill’s face fell and Tom sighed. “No, see, you can’t get mad.”

“You want a girlfriend?” Bill asked.

Tom stroked Bill’s hair, pushing it off his face. “No. You understand why I said it, though… right?”

Bill furrowed his eyebrows. “I don’t know. No.”

“If we have girlfriends, Mom will think we like them and, you know, not each other,” Tom said, blushing.

“You like me,” Bill teased.

Tom rolled his eyes. “What do you think?”

Bill sat up and reached for his pants, and started pulling them on. “You want me to kiss a girl?” he asked in a tiny voice.

The thought of anyone else kissing Bill made Tom's belly heavy. "I don't know. No. No way.”

“I don’t want you to kiss girls either,” Bill said. “I just…”

Tom scooted close to Bill and poked him in the shoulder. “We don’t even have to kiss them, okay? Maybe just… go on a date?”

“No kissing?” Bill asked, hopefully.

“No kissing.”

Bill smiled and kissed Tom quickly on the nose. “I guess it’ll work.”

“Hey, no kissing,” Tom said playfully.

“Oh, shut up,” Bill said, and kissed Tom hard on the mouth. “Kiss me now.”

Tom grinned, and did.

Don't Tell Mom (2/?)

Wed, 10 Oct 2007 06:49:01 GMT

Title: Don't Tell Mom (2/?)
Previous Chapters: Here
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17 (eventually)
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: What Mom doesn't know won't kill her.

.age 8.

“Please, Mrs. Kaulitz, take a seat,” Mrs. Zumwald, the twins’ second grade teacher, said, sitting at her desk.

Simone winced a bit at being called “Mrs. Kaulitz” since the divorce had been final months ago, but she didn’t say anything. She was tired of explaining herself and her situation to near strangers.

“I suppose you may be wondering why I’ve asked you to come in today,” Mrs. Zumwald said.

“I’m hoping it’s nothing too bad,” Simone said, wringing her hands together.

Mrs. Zumwald smiled. “You have two very bright, special children,” she assured.

Simone sighed in relief. “Thank you. But I take it that’s not all you have to say?”

“Bill and Tom are progressing very well for their age, academically. It’s the social aspect that I am a bit worried about. Have you noticed that they tend to be a tad… clingy?”

“Yes, they’re very close, always have been,” Simone said. “Is that a problem?”

“I think it’s wonderful that they work so well together and get along,” Mrs. Zumwald said. “But they aren’t interacting with the other children. And you know that children can be cruel.”

“Are they picking on anyone?” Simone asked. “Is it Tom?”

“No, nothing like that. It’s the other children. They don’t quite understand the twins’ special relationship.”

“Special? I’m not sure I know you mean.” Simone thought back to all the times she’d caught Bill and Tom sitting together in the dark, to the time she caught them kissing just before bed. Her stomach turned.

“They hold hands, for example,” Mrs. Zumwald said. “Very normal, very darling, really. But the other boys in the class…”

“Oh,” Simone said, blinking. “I wasn’t aware they were drawing attention to themselves.”

“Please, it’s hardly a disruption in class,” Mrs. Zumwald said. “I am more concerned about your boys’ feelings and well being. I’m not trying to be nosey but…”

“I’m glad you called me in.” Simone sighed lightly. “Without getting too much into it, I want to say that, well, it has been something of an issue at home.”

“Oh?”

Simone frowned. “The divorce was hard on them, I never wanted to discourage their behavior.”

“Nor do I.” The teacher paused, and an uncomfortable silence followed.

“I’ll talk with them,” Simone said, trying to calm the swirling in her stomach. “Maybe they can… um… express themselves at home only.”

Mrs. Zumwald nodded. “I don’t want them to be the target of anything.”

“What else do they do besides the hand holding?” Simone asked.

“Well,” Mrs. Zumwald murmured, looking down. “I guess it’s more the way they look at each other, the way they only seem to exist for one another. The hand holding is really the only physical thing.”

Simone felt relieved at that. “I will talk to them,” she repeated.

“Alright. I think we’re done here, unless you have any other questions about how they’re doing?”

“No,” Simone said, shaking her head and standing. “I will call if anything comes up.”

They said their goodbyes and Simone left feeling almost numb. So, it wasn’t just her own imagination. Other people noticed as well.

She didn’t know what to do or what to say to her boys. They were just so very attached to each other, and she didn’t think it was something wrong. What they had was beautiful.

It was just a little strange, perhaps.

She would have to talk to them about it later.

**

“Bill, get your pajamas on,” Simone said, sitting on Tom’s bed and helping him wax his dreadlocks. Tom had insisted on dreadlocking his hair after he saw one of Gordon’s bandmates sporting the hairstyle. Simone’s first reaction had been to say no, but Gordon and Tom had talked her into it.

Bill whined as he pulled on his pants. “Mom, pay attention to me!”

“One moment, Billy,” she said, fondness in her voice.

Tom laughed, not unkindly. “Billy,” he teased.

Bill scowled. “Tomi.”

“Hold still, Tom,” Simone said, working her fingers through Tom’s short, clumped hair. It was just past his ears. “Bill, get comfortable.”

“I can’t,” Bill said pathetically. “I’m not even tired.”

“I am,” Tom said, cringing as his mother tugged at his hair. “Mom!”

“You’re the one who wanted the dreads,” Simon said warily. She finished with the jar of wax and set it on the table between the twins’ beds. “Okay, time to lie down.”

“You’re putting us to bed?” Bill asked. “You never do anymore.”

“Tonight I am,” Simone said softly. “Billy, come over here. Sit on Tom’s bed.”

Bill bounded over and sat Indian-style on the foot of Tom’s bed. Tom moved to be near Bill, but Simone sat herself between them.

“Boys,” she began nervously. “I want to talk to you about something.”

Tom tugged at his hair and yawned. “What?”

“Are we in trouble?” Bill asked. He started chewing on his lip worriedly. Simone shook her head and patted them both on the back.

“You’re not in trouble at all,” she said softly. “I just want to talk to you two about how… how you love each other.”

Bill and Tom both looked confused.

“I love Bill,” Tom said, sticking his chest out a bit.

“Of course you do, sweetie,” she said. “It’s okay to love each other as much as you do. I want you to know that.”

“I’m in love with Tom,” Bill said, looking to his mother for approval.

Simone frowned and stroked Bill’s cheek. “No, Bill, you aren’t. You just love him.”

“I love him like you and Gordon love each other. You are in love,” Bill said, his voice straining a bit. “Right?”

Simone’s mouth went a little dry; she didn’t know how to explain to them the different kinds of love. “Gordon and I love each other like boys and girls love each other,” she said slowly. “How you love someone you want to be with forever.”

“I want to be with Tom forever,” Bill said, sticking his lip out.

“Yes, I know,” Simone said. “I mean, we love each other like two people who want to get married.”

“Like you and Dad?” Tom asked. He was staring down at the floor, frowning.

“Yes,” Simone said.

“Then why did he leave, if you loved each other?” Bill asked.

“Honey, it’s very complicated,” she said. “You two, you two will never leave each other, right?”

“No,” Tom said, very seriously. “I’m in love with Bill.”

Simone sighed and shook her head again. “You’re brothers, brothers aren’t ever in love.”

“Why?” Bill asked.

“I am,” Tom said, confused. “I know I am because it’s serious.”

Simone rubbed Tom’s shoulder. “I know you’re serious, honey. I am so glad you two have each other but you have to know that no one really understands… I mean, and I don’t want you two to stop having each other. I know it has been a rough few years.”

“Tomi has taken care of me,” Bill said, looking crestfallen. “Was he not supposed to?”

“Oh, Billy,” Simone said, her heart breaking. She pulled him into a hug and squeezed him so hard he squeaked. “I don’t know how to explain to you that what you’re doing is wrong.”

“Wrong?” Tom repeated. He looked horrified.

Simone bit her lip. She hadn’t meant for it to come out that way, but deep down, she’d meant it a little. “I don’t really know what to say. You can’t kiss your brother on the lips, Tom.”

Tom’s cheeks flushed. “What?”

“You can’t kiss Bill on the lips,” Simone said. Tom ducked his head. “Okay?”

“Okay,” Tom muttered.

Bill pouted. “Why can’t he?”

“Because brothers aren’t supposed to do that,” she said, trying to make sense of it all. “You can kiss on the cheek, though. That’s just fine, boys. You can hug too and hold hands.”

“On the cheek?” Tom asked. He wouldn’t even look up at Simone.

“Yes, that’s a very nice thing to do,” Simone said. “But we have to make a rule that you only do those things when you’re home.” She felt terrible telling them this, felt terrible seeing their faces drop with obvious guilt.

“I don’t want to do it if it’s wrong,” Bill whispered. “I don’t want you to be mad at me.”

“Bill,” Tom said, upset.

Simone took one of Bill’s hands and one of Tom’s hands, and she put them together. “It’s okay,” she said quietly. “I just don’t want people to look at you and think anything bad. No one outside of this house understands. You have to know that people are cruel and Bill, Tom can’t protect you from everything.”

“Yes I can,” said Tom, his chin trembling. A tear fell from the corner of his eye and Simone squeezed their hands together more tightly.

“Listen,” Simone told them. “Don’t stop loving each other, okay? Don’t stop being affectionate. Just please, from now on, only do that stuff at home and also,” she added, wincing. “If and when you feel that you want to, um, kiss each other… do it on the cheeks. Brothers are supposed to kiss each other on the cheeks.”

Bill was shaking, his eyes wide and wet. “Mom, are you upset with us? You look sad.”

“No,” Simone said. “I just don’t want people to hurt you.”

Tom didn’t even say anything to that. Simone just kept their hands joined and stood up, kissing them both on the tops of their heads. “Goodnight, boys.”

Bill nodded and Tom mumbled, “Night.”

When Simone shut the light off and closed the door, Bill and Tom sat quietly for a few moments.

“Bill.”

“Yeah.”

“I think I’m still in love with you.”

Bill frowned and crawled over to his own bed. “Mom said you aren’t.”

“I know. But I am.” Tom got under his covers and stared at the ceiling. “I think.”

“I don’t want Mom to be mad,” Bill said.

“She doesn’t… have to know,” Tom answered. “If she doesn’t know she can’t be mad.”

“But she said it was wrong.”

Tom got up and moved over to Bill. “Do you always listen to what Mom says?”

Bill curled to his side, facing Tom. “Yes.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t. I wanna kiss you good night. I just wanna.” Tom leaned down to press a kiss to Bill’s lips, but Bill turned his head away. Tom’s lips grazed Bill’s cheek. “Bill?”

“That’s how brothers kiss,” Bill said.

“But I want to kiss you like Mom and Gordon kiss,” Tom whispered. “That’s how I love you, Bill. Mom doesn’t know.”

“She always knows,” Bill said.

“I take care of you,” Tom said. “Always.”

“But Mom…”

Tom’s hands touched Bill’s cheek softly, just as their mother would always do. “Just don’t tell Mom,” Tom said. “Just don’t tell Mom.”

Bill nodded and turned his head back to look at Tom. He reached a hand up and brushed his fingers against Tom’s cheek, gentle as anything, and Tom smiled. It was dark, but a sliver of light poured in from the bottom of the door, and Bill could see the shadows of Tom’s face. Tom lay down next to Bill and bumped their noses together. Bill gasped softly.

“Tomi,” he whispered.

“Shh,” Tom told him. He kissed Bill’s lips carefully, slowly, and then pulled back. “Good night.”

Bill watched as Tom got up to go to his own bed. “Tomi?” he said again.

“Yeah?”

“Come back,” Bill said softly. “Stay with me. I’m scared.”

“Don’t be scared,” Tom said, but he went to Bill’s bed and climbed back in anyway. “I won’t let anything get you.”

Bill nodded, and they smiled before turning around and falling asleep, back to back.

**

.age 10.

“Oh, look at that,” Bill said, eyes going wide as they watched the television. He tugged on one of the dreads he was waxing and Tom grunted in pain. “Sorry. But. Uh.”

They were up late, on a school night even, watching the channels their mother kept forgetting to cancel. It didn’t matter though, since their mother and Gordon, now their stepfather, were out to dinner with the neighbors. Tom was on the floor sitting cross legged, and Bill was above him on the couch, his legs dangling on either side of Tom’s body.

“Wow, look at how they kiss,” Tom said. “I can’t wait to kiss a girl like that. I’ve never kissed anyone.”

Bill tugged Tom’s hair purposely.

“Ouch!”

“You’ve kissed me, stupid,” Bill said, smirking. “And we’re only ten, so you shouldn’t be kissing girls like that.”

“That’s what Mom says,” Tom said. “Besides, I don’t kiss you like that. I just kiss you goodnight.” He pointed to the television where two barely clothed people were sucking each other’s faces off. “That is real kissing. Look, tongues and shit.”

“That looks gross,” Bill said. He waxed one more dread and then set the jar down, patting Tom’s head. “You don’t wanna do that.”

“Uh… yeah I do,” Tom said.

Bill continued stroking Tom’s hair, putting his feet on Tom’s shoulders and digging his toes in. “Why? It looks wet.”

“Wet is good,” Tom said, laughing.

“Hmm…” Bill’s hands stroked down to Tom’s neck, pressing in softly. Tom groaned at the touch. Bill could never just sit with Tom and not touch him, it was impossible. And Tom loved it.

“Gimme a massage,” Tom said.

“Are you sore?” Bill asked, a bit of worry in his voice. “Is it because I kicked you out of bed last night?” Tom and Bill had made it habit to sleep together most nights, and while Tom was usually the more restless of the two at night (Bill was more restless during the day), Bill hadn’t been able to sleep the night before. He’d rolled over and pushed Tom onto his ass on the floor.

“Maybe,” Tom said. “Maybe I won’t sleep with you anymore and the monsters will get you.” They both laughed.

“You have to sleep with me because you love me,” Bill said, suddenly serious. Tom turned around, moving Bill’s legs out of the way.

“I won’t stop sleeping with you, I was kidding,” he said. He grabbed Bill’s hand and squeezed it. “Okay?”

Bill smiled. “Mom would like it if you did.”

Tom rolled his eyes. He turned his attention back to the TV screen. Bill’s hands were still moving around on his neck and shoulders, and Tom felt Bill’s legs close in on either side of him. Tom leaned back, resting the back of his head on Bill’s stomach.

“Look at that,” Tom murmured. “They’re like not even coming up for air.” The couple kissing on the screen was making Tom’s stomach swirl.

Bill tilted his head, watching. “I guess they’re breathing for each other, maybe.”

Tom pinched Bill’s leg. “You can’t breathe for someone else, idiot.”

“Hey,” Bill replied. “It was just a guess.”

Tom nodded. He hoisted himself up onto the couch, and he and Bill snuggled against each other. Tom took Bill’s hand and started squeezing each knuckle and joint. Bill sighed happily and leaned his head against Tom’s shoulder.

“Maybe we could try that,” Bill said, very softly. “Just once, so you could see what it’s like.”

Tom turned his face to Bill, they were just a few inches apart. “Really?”

Bill nodded. “Yeah.”

“I don’t know if you could do it like that,” Tom said, nodding to the television. “It looks pretty good.”

“I could do it better.”

Tom raised his eyebrows. “Yeah?”

Bill grinned and got up on his knees, and positioned himself in Tom’s lap with his legs on either side. Tom watched with wide eyes and put his hands on Bill’s hips. “See?” Bill whispered. “Not that hard.”

“You haven’t done it yet.”

“Okay.” Bill leaned in and laughed, and pulled back again. Tom took Bill’s face in his hands and smashed their lips together painfully, their noses colliding and teeth hitting together. “Ow!!” Bill wailed.

“Oh my god, you idiot!” Tom let go of Bill and put his hands to his face, rubbing his lips and nose. “Bill, that was so bad!!”

Bill frowned, rubbing his lips, and crawled off Tom’s lap and sat on the floor. He buried his face in his drawn up knees. “Sorry.”

Tom immediately regretted his words. He grabbed Bill’s hands tightly. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I guess it was half my fault.”

“You didn’t give me time to…” Bill lifted his head, his face flushing. “You didn’t give me a chance to do it.”

“Do it again,” Tom said. “I promise I’ll just sit back and let you do it.”

Bill smiled a bit. “Are you sure? That was really weird.”

“Come on Bill,” Tom said encouragingly. He stroked Bill’s face, just how he would do when Bill was upset and crying, but this time it made Bill shiver.

“Okay,” Bill murmured. He crawled toward Tom and nudged their faces together. “Open your mouth, like the girl.”

“Not a girl,” Tom said, but he opened his mouth anyway. Bill kissed his lips very softly, like they did before bedtime, and then poked his tongue out, just barely brushing inside Tom’s mouth. Tom’s hands gripped Bill’s shoulders and pulled him forward.

“Tom, you’re not supposed—”

Tom pressed his tongue insistently inside Bill’s mouth and they both groaned. It was wet, sloppy, but they were panting by time they pulled away.

“I wanna… again,” Bill said.

“Yeah?” Tom leaned forward again and Bill nodded. Their lips connected, more hungrily this time, and Tom moved his hands all down Bill’s back, resting just above his waist. Bill gasped and fell forward, opening his mouth, inviting Tom’s tongue in. He closed his eyes as he remembered seeing the people on TV do, and he tilted his head so that their lips lined up better. Tom licked the roof of Bill’s mouth lightly and Bill shook, wrinkling his nose and grinning.

“Tomi,” Bill whispered. “How do you know they did that?”

“I don’t, I just wanted to,” Tom replied softly. “Again?”

“Yes.”

Bill scooted up more, his chest flat against Tom’s, and Tom gripped Bill’s thighs. They’d not been that intimately close before and it was both exhilarating and terrifying. Tom sucked Bill’s tongue into his mouth and Bill sighed, his eyelids fluttering helplessly. “Ugh, Tom.”

“What is it?”

Bill smiled and hugged Tom tightly around the shoulders, burying his face in Tom’s neck. “That,” he said, “is how we should kiss from now on.”

Tom pulled back and took Bill’s face in his hands. “I changed my mind,” he said quietly. “Only you. I don’t want to kiss anyone else like that. Just you.”

“Good.” Bill smiled wide and wiped at his mouth. “Messy,” he said. Tom laughed and kissed Bill again, wetting Bill’s lips with his tongue. “Ugh, you’re messy, Tomi.”

Tom pulled back and smiled, licking his lips. “I like it messy.” Their hands met and they sat together in silence.

“Fuckin’ love kissing you,” Bill said.

“Still fuckin’ love me?” Tom asked.

Bill nodded. “Fuck yeah.”

“Fuckin’ good,” Tom said.

Bill laughed. “I want to watch some more of that fuckin’ movie.”

“Want to get some fuckin’ popcorn?”

They stood, bumping shoulders. “Lead the fuckin’ way.”

“Fuckin’ Bill.”

“Fuckin’ Tomi.”

They stopped in the doorway to the kitchen and their lips met, wet and warm.

**

Bill sighed deeply, curling his legs closer to his body and enjoying the warmth next to him. He felt hands move up and down his arms, soothing him. Bill turned, lying flat on his back, and smiled at his brother.

“You move too much,” Tom whispered.

“I’m not tired,” Bill replied, bumping their noses together. He kissed Tom’s lips softly, licking around his mouth. It’d been a month since they’d been giving each other more than just goodnight kisses, and they rarely slept alone now.

“You’d better get tired,” Tom said. “I saw you sleeping in French.”

“French sucks.”

They both laughed. Tom wrapped his arm around Bill’s waist and pressed his face into Bill’s shoulder. “Yeah, French sucks.”

Bill squirmed again, turning to his side, facing Tom. “Movie kiss,” he said.

Tom grinned and kissed Bill soundly, slowly, rubbing his back. Bill squealed in Tom’s hold and felt his toes curl.

“We’re getting really good at that,” Bill said, nuzzling into Tom. “Do you like it?”

Tom pinched Bill’s arm. “What do you think?”

“I don’t know,” Bill said, smiling. Tom pinched him again and then pushed him to his back. He hovered over Bill and kissed him deeply. They loved playing around like this, loved the soft, warm feelings it sparked in both their bellies. They were still a little too young to understand what they were feeling, what they were doing.

All they knew was that they liked it and that they couldn’t tell their mother. She could never know.

“Tomi,” Bill whispered, feeling Tom move against his body. “Tom, stop.”

“What?”

Bill stared up at Tom, eyes wide. His belly felt extremely hot, and his toes were almost cramping from how good it felt. “I don’t know.” He slid to the side, out from under Tom. “Lie next to me, right here.”

Tom felt confused and his own belly was swirling, but he lowered himself and put an arm over Bill’s middle. “That was weird.”

“I think I’m tired now,” Bill said, smiling a little and lacing his fingers through Tom’s. “You made my belly feel crazy.”

“I think that’s good.” Tom kissed Bill’s jaw. “You did it to me, too.”

“I felt like I was going to be sick.”

“In a good way?”

“I don’t know,” Bill said. “I’m all tingly.”

Tom nodded, pushing his hair out of his face and moving closer to Bill. “I hope I didn’t hurt you or anything.”

Bill kissed Tom and closed his eyes. “Mm, nope. Just made me feel funny.”

Tom grinned in the dark. “Funny enough to leave?”

“Jeez. No way. Never.”

Tom settled against the mattress, letting out a long breath, attempting to calm his jittering limbs. “Good night, Bill.”

“Good night.”

**

.age 12.

Simone was washing dishes in the afternoon, waiting for the twins to come home from school. She was on edge, focusing on the hot water hitting the plates. Her mind was troubled because she had something to talk to the boys about. It pained her because she knew that any other twelve year old boys would be delighted at the prospect of what she was going to tell them, but Bill and Tom…

She thought about the past couple of years, the things she had accidentally seen. It hadn’t been anything entirely alarming, but she knew that something was strange.

This was the only way she could think of to control them, control what they might or might not be doing.

As if on cue, the door opened and the boys trudged in, holding hands and bumping shoulders.

“Boys?”

Tom immediately dropped Bill’s hand and looked down at the floor.

Simone frowned and turned off the water. “Have a seat for a second.”

They both sat, looking a bit glum, as if they knew what was coming. “I was just holding his hand,” Tom said, not looking up at Simone. “No one saw.”

Simone shook her head. “That wasn’t what I wanted to talk to you about.”

Tom seemed to breathe a sigh of relief at her words. “What?”

Bill kicked at Tom’s chair leg. “Yeah, are we in trouble?”

“No, it’s a good thing,” she said, trying to keep it positive. “Gordon and I decided that since you two are growing up so fast that you might need your own space.”

“No,” Tom said immediately, before Simone could even go on.

“What?” Bill asked. He was obviously oblivious to what Simone was implying.

“She wants to separate us,” Tom said. Bill grabbed Tom’s hand on top of the table and stared hard at Simone.

“We just think it’s time for you two to have your own rooms, that’s all,” Simone said. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“I don’t want my own room,” Bill said. “I get scared.”

“You’re too old for that,” Simone said, reaching her hand across the table and squeezing both her boys’ hands. “You two need some personal space.”

“I don’t need any space from Bill,” Tom said vehemently. He tore his hand away from Simone’s. Simone pulled her hand back, looking at it and feeling her heart break a little. Tom was glaring at her, looking at her the way he looked at their father whenever he’d show up to randomly take them out for dinner or to a movie.

“We’re fine together,” Bill said. His voice wasn’t angry like Tom’s, just very soft and quiet.

Simone sighed. “This isn’t your decision, boys.”

“Why?” Tom said, “It’s our room. He’s my brother!”

“Don’t take that tone, Tom,” Simone said wearily.

Tom stood up, his chair knocking over with a loud crash. “Why do you always try and separate us? Why do you always look at us like that?”

Simone’s heart ached for Tom. “Tom, this isn’t about anything you did wrong.”

“Then why are you making us?” Tom yelled. He crossed his arms and refused to look at her.

“You’re twelve and we have the extra space,” was all Simone could say.

“Is it because I sleep with him?” Bill asked, his voice very small. “Because I won’t anymore. I promise.”

Simone didn’t want to talk about that at all. “No, Bill, that isn’t why.”

“Because I get scared,” Bill said. “I hear noises and I don’t want to be alone. Sometimes I think someone is coming into the house. Sometimes I think Dad is coming back… to take us.” Tears shimmered in Bill’s eyes and Simone went to him, holding him as best she could. She thought, with sadness, that she probably couldn’t do it nearly as well as Tom.

Bill didn’t seem to fit in her arms anymore, he’d shifted and changed.

“Tonight,” Simone said softly. “Tonight we’re moving Bill into the guest room. It’s right across from your room now, you’ll still be close.”

Tom was still glaring, and Bill pulled away from his mother and went over to sit by Tom. “Mom,” Bill said. “I don’t want this.”

“Gordon will move the bigger stuff, like your dresser, and your bed,” Simone went on, trying her hardest to ignore Bill’s soft whimpers. “There are some boxes in the garage to put your smaller things into.”

“This sucks,” Tom said.

“Tom,” Simone warned. She sighed. “Billy, you can decorate the new room anyway you like.”

“I never will,” Bill managed, crying a little. He and Tom were holding hands again. Simone hadn’t even noticed when they started.

Simone shook her head and stood up. “I’ll let you two calm down. Just… try thinking of this as a positive thing, because it is. Everyone needs their space.”

“I want Tom’s space,” Bill mumbled.

“You will, don’t worry,” Tom said quietly.

“No,” Simone said loudly. “This has to stop. You’re going to have your own rooms and that’s final. Boxes in the garage. You two should fill one of the boxes with clothes and things you don’t want anymore, alright?”

“Should we put our shit in separate boxes, too?” Tom asked. “Should we ride separate buses to school? Should we sit at separate tables at dinner?”

Simone had had enough. “Tom Kaulitz, go to your room and start packing, right now.”

Tom stomped his foot, showing his age, and then tugged Bill with him to the stairs.

“Bill, stay here,” Simone said sternly. Bill looked from Tom to Simone, his face twisted up in confusion.

“You can go wherever you want,” Tom said. He squeezed Bill’s hand hard.

“Bill,” she said in warning. She felt out of control and she didn’t like it.

To her great surprise, Bill shook his head, disobeying her and running up the stairs with Tom. She sat back down and put her head in her hands.

When had she lost so much control?

She sighed heavily. Maybe she’d never had control in the first place.

**

Bill heard the stairs creak and he tensed, lying alone in his bed in his new room. It was so dark in his room, darker than in his old one.

“Mom?” he asked, biting his lip. No one responded. The stairs creaked again. He couldn’t do this.

He stepped out of bed, feeling a little shamed, and crept to Tom’s door. He stared at it. Their mother had said they couldn’t share a room, but she wasn’t here now.

Bill pushed the door open. “Tom?”

Tom sat up in his bed. “Bill?”

“Can I—”

“Of course.” Tom was already turning the blankets down and moving over. “I didn’t think you were coming.”

“I couldn’t sleep,” Bill said. “I can’t stay, Tom.”

“You have to,” Tom said quietly. “Come on, stay.”

Bill shook his head, hanging by the door. “You don’t know how much I want to.”

“Mom and Gordon share a room.”

“They share a bed,” Bill said slowly. “So?”

Tom hunched forward, the blankets pooling in his lap. “I love you, Bill, and you need to be in here with me.”

Bill bit his lip. He took a few steps closer. “I love you,” he whispered.

Tom smiled. He felt his belly stir with excitement. “I want to feel you.”

“What?” Bill asked, shocked.

“Don’t you?”

“Well, yeah,” Bill said, feeling himself flush. He was taking small steps toward Tom, even though he knew he wasn’t supposed to. “So much it hurts.”

Tom took Bill’s hand and tugged him closer. “Come on.”

“Mom said…”

“She doesn’t have to know,” Tom said quietly. “She never has to know.”

“She’ll find out and make it even worse,” Bill replied, frowning. He sat down on the bed, leaning into his brother. “I hate this.”

“Just stay,” Tom whispered, pulling Bill to lie down with him. “It’s okay, I’ve got you.”

“Promise?”

“Yeah.

Bill smiled and curled up next to his brother, closing his eyes. “I’m scared,” he murmured. And he was, but he was no longer scared of monsters under his bed, or goblins in his closet. He was terrified of what might happen if their mother caught them. He was terrified of being separated even more from Tom.

Tom kissed the back of Bill’s neck, sensing the tense muscles there. “It‘s okay,” Tom said in Bill‘s ear. “Just don’t tell Mom.”

Don't Tell Mom (1/?)

Mon, 08 Oct 2007 05:24:18 GMT

Title: Don't Tell Mom (1/?)
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17 (eventually)
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: What Mom doesn't know won't kill her.

.age 6.

Tom took Bill’s trembling hand in his own and squeezed. Bill leaned into his brother and stared down the staircase with wide, unblinking eyes. He drew in a sharp breath.

They were fighting again. This time seemed worse than ever because this time, it wasn’t loud.

“Shh,” Tom said softly, pinching Bill’s knee.

Bill shook his head and leaned forward, perching his feet up one step higher so that his belly rested against his thighs.

“Why aren’t they yelling?” Bill asked, bringing his floppy shirt sleeve up to his nose, sniffling into it. “What’s happening?”

“Nothing,” Tom lied.

“Okay,” Bill said. “Nothing.”

Tom held onto Bill tight then, both wincing as a door slammed. “You’ll wake the boys!” Simone yelled.

“Don’t bring the boys into this,” their father shouted back. “You always bring the boys into this.”

“You’re never home!”

Bill smashed his face into Tom’s neck. “Make it stop, make it stop.”

Tom squeezed Bill harder, not knowing how to stop it. He squeezed his eyes shut and said, “Just close your eyes, like Mom says. No more monsters."

“I hear them,” Bill whispered, eyes still wide.

“I have reasons for never being home, you know that,” their father said loudly, sternly. “I work long hours so that you don’t have to.”

“I raise our children!” Simone threw her hands up. “I do so much more than you know, Jorg. If you even bothered to talk to me, or even ask what I’m doing or how I’m feeling.”

“I would,” he replied icily, “if you’d stop crawling up my ass about every little thing, Simone. Jesus Christ.”

“When did you stop?” Simone’s tone had lost its anger. “When did you stop being there for me, the boys? Our family?”

Jorg was silent for a few moments. “I don’t know.”

Simone let out a long breath. “I didn’t expect that answer.”

Bill curled his toes into the hard stairs and stared wide eyed, his father’s legs had come into view. His shoes were on, he was putting on a jacket. He had a bag.

“Where’s Dad going?” Bill asked. Tom looked, too; he knew their father was leaving.

“Nowhere,” Tom said. He held Bill tighter. “No one’s going.”

“When are you coming back this time, Jorg?” Simone asked loudly.

Jorg slung his bag over his shoulder, he didn’t see his children at the top of the stairs, staring down at them, one sniffling, and the other glaring with burning eyes and clenched fists.

“This time I’m not coming back,” Jorg said.

“You can’t just…”

“Watch me.”

One more door slammed and Bill hunched over into Tom’s lap, snot and tears running down his face. “He’s gone, he’s gone, he’s gone.”

Tom stroked Bill’s back, hands balled up. “Bill, Bill,” Tom said. “He’s not gone.”

“He is.”

“He’s not,” Tom repeated. They stayed quiet for a few minutes, listening to their mother moving around downstairs. She was cursing under her breath and slamming things. Bill curled closer to Tom, clutching onto his arm.

“What happens now?” Bill asked. “Is it gonna be different?”

Bill was crying steadily into Tom’s shirt. Tom tried to keep calm, but he was feeling angry. “It’s gonna be okay.”

“How?”

Tom shrugged. “It just is.”

“I miss Dad,” Bill said softly.

“You shouldn’t, he doesn’t miss us,” Tom said, pulling Bill closer. “Just forget him.”

“What if Mom leaves?”

“She won’t,” Tom said.

Bill frowned, stopping his tears for a moment. “Will you leave?”

Tom squeezed Bill so hard he whimpered. “I’m never gonna leave you.”

“What if you do on accident?” Bill asked. He wiped his nose on Tom’s shoulder.

“I’m never gonna,” Tom said again. “I love you more than Dad. I love you more than Mom.”

Bill smiled a little, still crying, and in his six year old mind, it made sense. “I love you too, Tomi.”

They huddled together tightly, and that’s how Simone found them hours later.

**

A week later, Simone brought some laundry into the living room with the intention of ironing, folding, and putting it away. She sighed heavily, rubbing the back of her hand over her forehead. She was weary and older, it seemed, so much older than she’d been a week earlier. Several days of being a single parent had really worn on her.

She put the laundry basket on the couch and turned on the lamp. She wasn’t expecting to see the twins on the floor, sitting close together in the dark.

“Boys?” Simone said.

“Hi,” Bill said quietly. Simone saw that their fingers were firmly threaded together.

“What are you up to?” Simone asked slowly.

Bill scooted even closer to Tom, and Tom raised his chin and looked at his mother. “Nothing.”

“Do you boys want to go outside and play?” she asked. They both shook their heads. “You’ve been inside all weekend.”

“I don’t wanna go out,” Bill said. “We’re playing inside.”

Simone sighed deeply. Her two usually rambunctious children had been meek and quiet ever since their father left. He’d run off before, but Simone had a feeling that even Bill and Tom knew that this time it was for real.

Jorg wasn’t coming home.

“Why don’t you two watch some television?” They didn’t respond, only nuzzled together a little closer. She understood they were upset and that it might take some time for them to get over what had happened. She wasn’t worried.

She kept telling herself that. She knelt down and hugged her boys close. “Okay, but dinner will be soon,” she said.

Before she left she turned on a light. Bill hid his little face in the crook of Tom’s neck and Tom held him harder.

**

A few months passed. Things had settled and Tom and Bill had learned the meaning of divorce. Simone had been trying her best to keep things normal in the house, she had tried so hard to give her boys extra love so that the pain of their father leaving wouldn’t be as great.

She needn’t have worried though. It seemed as though Tom and Bill were filling the void enough with each other’s company. Simone kept finding them huddled, hugging, nuzzling, curling up together. They rarely went anywhere by themselves, and they always held hands when they walked.

Simone thought it was sweet.

One evening, Simone had a date with a man she had met at an art show. His name was Gordon and he made her feel appreciated again. She lined up a babysitter for the twins and was feeling excited; she hadn’t had a night to herself for many months. She made herself look nice and put on some extra makeup, and wore some heels. When it came time to leave, she went up to the twins’ room and gasped.

Bill was crying on his bed, and Tom was hugging him tight.

“What is it?” Simone asked, immediately going to them.

Bill shook his head and looked up with wide, glistening eyes. “Nothing.”

“I’m taking care of him,” Tom told their mother.

“Sweethearts,” Simone said, sighing a little, all thoughts of her date gone. “Billy, what’s making you sad?”

Tom hugged Bill tighter, almost possessively.

“Where are you going?” Bill asked through sniffles. “When are you coming back?”

Simone sat on the bed and tried to put a hand on Bill’s arm, but Tom covered it with his own hand. Something dropped in her stomach, Tom was almost glaring at her.

“I’m just going out with a friend,” Simone said. She stroked Bill’s hair and Tom pressed his nose into Bill’s back. “I’ll be back very, very soon. I’m not going away, okay?”

“I have you Bill, don’t worry,” Tom mumbled into his brother’s back. Bill cried a little more, his nose running on Tom’s shirt sleeve.

“Boys, I am not leaving you,” she said.

“It’s okay if you do,” Tom said.

Bill sniffed loudly.

Simone pulled both of them to her, awkwardly into her lap. She’d perfected holding both of her boys years ago, but now it seemed that Tom had perfected holding Bill, and nothing was going to get in the way of that. Simone kissed both of their foreheads and sighed again, her breath blowing their hair softly. “You know,” she said. “I am really glad you have each other because I’m not always going to be here.”

“Where are you-”

“Nowhere,” Simone said quickly. She ran a hand down Tom’s tense forearm and gently pulled it off of Bill. Bill gave a panicked look and Simone placed her other hand on his back. “I want you two to take care of each other, always, okay?”

“I already do,” Tom said, puffing his chest out a bit.

Simone smiled. “I know, Tom, and you’re a wonderful older brother.”

Bill bit his lip and leaned into Tom, still trembling slightly. “It’s okay for you to go with your friend, Mom. Tomi has me.”

Tom nodded firmly.

“Alright,” Simone said softly. “I’m going to kiss you good night, and tomorrow when you wake up, there’ll be waffles.”

“Yummy,” Bill said, smiling a little.

“The good kind?” Tom asked.

“The best kind,” Simone replied, kissing them both and standing up. “Do I look okay?”

“You look really so pretty,” Tom said, and Bill nodded, clutching Tom’s arm.

Simone watched them for a moment before she walked out. Bill had gone back to burying his face in Tom’s shoulder and Tom had moved over to where Simone had been sitting. He had almost pulled Bill into his lap and they were just sitting, wrapped up in each other. Simone was certain that they weren’t aware she was still in the room.

She nodded once and turned to leave. As she walked down the steps she wondered how long they’d be so close. They couldn’t stay that way forever.

‘No one does,’ she thought sadly.

**

.age 8.

“When?” Bill asked impatiently. “When, Tomi?”

Tom poked Bill in the shoulder. “Soon. Mom’ll be home soon.”

The eight year old boys sat at the top of the steps in their pajamas, waiting. Their mother had gone out at seven and it was ten now. The babysitter was downstairs watching movies Bill and Tom weren’t supposed to see.

They’d been tucked into bed, but they quickly found their way to the stairs, their favorite spot to sit and play. Bill had his matted stuffed cat in his hand, a gift from his father when he was very little. Tom had been given a stuffed dog but he didn’t have it anymore.

“Do you think she’ll bring back a snack?” Bill asked.

“She will,” Tom said, very sure. Their mother always brought back snacks or gifts after dates with Gordon. The boys knew they were dates now, even though they weren’t entirely sure what dates were.

Simone had brought Gordon home months ago and let the boys meet him. They’d had dinner and watched movies and though Gordon left soon after, he was back in the morning for breakfast.

Bill had thought that was sort of weird and Tom had just called him “silly” and told him Gordon had never really left. Besides all that, the boys liked Gordon. He was always smiling and bringing them candy.

“Think he’ll sleep over tonight?” Bill whispered, leaning forward.

“I don’t know, maybe,” Tom replied. “He’s been doing it a lot lately.”

Bill frowned, tugging on the bottoms of his pants. “Maybe this time-”

He was cut off as the door opened downstairs, and the twins saw legs and feet moving around. Bill recognized his mother’s heels.

“There they are,” Tom said softly.

Bill nodded. They watched quietly as Simone paid the babysitter and Gordon disappeared for a moment. “Where’d he go?” Bill murmured.

Tom shook his head. A few minutes later, Gordon returned, laughing.

“Simone, you’ll never guess what was on the television when I got in there,” he said, chuckling. “It looks like Elyse forgot to cover her tracks this time.”

“Oh god, was she watching those channels again? I keep forgetting to cancel them,” Simone replied, smiling. “Oh well, at least she’s good to the boys.”

Gordon smiled back. “What’s a little soft porn on a Friday night?”

“Gordon,” Simone laughed, and the twins watched as Gordon pulled their mother into a sweeping hug. “You want to stay over for the night?”

“I can’t, honey,” Gordon said, frowning. “I’ve got early business in the city tomorrow.”

Simone nodded. “So this is good night.”

“It was a very good night,” Gordon told her, stroking her face. Bill scooted closer to Tom and Tom held Bill’s hand. Gordon kissed Simone, dipping her slightly, and they heard Simone gasp delightedly.

“Good night,” Simone said when they pulled apart.

“Good night.”

Bill and Tom looked at each other. “Hurry,” Tom whispered.

They quickly ran to their bedroom before getting caught on the top of the stairs. Bill climbed into his bed, giggling, and pulled the covers over his head. “So this is goodnight,” Bill said.

Tom laughed and sat next to Bill on the bed, pulling the covers down. “It was a very good night,” he said. They both giggled and Bill pulled the blanket back up over his head. Tom poked him and tried tugging it down. “Bill. Bill?”

Bill poked his head out. “Huh?”

Tom leaned down and very gently and very sloppily kissed Bill on the lips. “Goodnight.”

Bill’s eyed widened a little and his face flushed. “Goodnight, Tomi.” Bill hid under his blanket again and touched his lips, smiling.

**

Bill lay quietly in his bed, listening to his brother breathe steadily. Tom hadn’t done it that time, he hadn’t kissed Bill good night as he had always done for the past couple of months. Bill was certain that Tom was mad at him, even though they’d had a really good day together.

Tom let out a small snore and Bill frowned, sitting up. “Tomi,” he said quietly.

It used to be a playful thing. They’d recite lines that they’d heard their mother and Gordon say to each other, giving each other playful smooches. As time passed, however, it became a more gentle, serious thing. Bill began thinking about his good night kiss early in the day, and Tom thought of more creative ways to go about giving it to Bill.

“Tom,” Bill said again, louder this time.

Tom rolled over and rubbed at his eyes. “Huh?”

“Are you mad at me?” Bill asked straight out.

Tom yawned. “Huh?”

Bill crawled over to Tom, across the small divide between their beds, and poked him. “Are you mad?”

“Why?” It was always really difficult to wake Tom up; Bill could see him falling asleep again. He poked him harder. “Ouch! What?”

“You never kissed me goodnight,” Bill whispered.

Tom sat up a little. “I did, too.”

“Nuh uh,” Bill said. “You didn’t. I can’t sleep.”

“You can’t?”

Bill shook his head, frowning. “No. I’m glad you could sleep, though.”

Tom cracked a smile. “Bill, come here.”

“I’m here,” Bill said, almost pouting.

“Up here.”

Bill crawled into bed with Tom and sat next to him. Tom put a hand on Bill’s shoulder and raised an eyebrow. “Good night?” Bill said unsurely.

“Bill,” Tom murmured, his hand moving to the back of Bill’s neck. He pulled him close and their lips connected. Bill smiled very wide as they pulled back. “Thank you. Can I stay? I’m scared.”

Tom made a face. “Of what?”

“Monsters,” Bill said back, very quietly. Tom curled up and made some room for Bill.

“Just tonight,” he said. “I kick.”

Bill laughed. “I know.”

They’d shared a bed before, when they were younger, and Tom was terrible at staying still. That night, though, Tom didn’t kick at all. With Bill all curled up around him they both slept soundly.

**

They were there again, sitting at the top of the stairs, awake after they should have been. Their babysitter, Elyse, had put them to bed an hour ago but Bill and Tom had snuck out moments after she left.

“I can hear bad words, I think,” Bill said, staring at Tom. “They sound bad. She’s got the TV on loud tonight.”

“I want to see one of those movies,” was all Tom said. He pulled at Bill’s hair and Bill moved closer to Tom, resting his head on his shoulder.

“Tired,” Bill mumbled through a yawn. “When are they coming back?”

“Mom said it would be an early night.” Tom squeezed Bill’s waist. “Maybe that means she’ll be home early.”

“Elyse shouldn’t be watching that,” Bill said, frowning as they both heard some words they knew were bad. “I’m telling.”

“Don’t tell, that’s stupid.” Tom nudged Bill’s shoulder. “I’ll tell Mom you sneak out of bed every night.”

“I don’t!”

“Do.”

Bill laughed quietly. “You’re dumb.”

“Maybe,” Tom said. He pinched Bill’s side and Bill squeaked. “Baby.”

Bill laughed, not at all hurt by his brother’s playful words. He liked when Tom paid attention to him. “I think I heard the car.”

“Are you sure?”

The television downstairs immediately turned off. “Yeah, she turned off the naughty stuff, they must be home,” Bill said.

Soon the door creaked open and familiar voices flooded through the house. Bill and Tom watched their feet and then scooted down a few more steps to see Elyse wave goodbye and leave.

Simone and Gordon shared a kiss, not the sort Bill and Tom normally saw. It wasn’t a goodnight kiss, that was for sure. It was longer. Bill and Tom watched very closely.

“Simone,” Gordon said, his voice very serious. “I…”

Simone kissed him again, her hands in his hair, on his arms, everywhere.

“Are they fighting?” Bill asked. Tom shook his head and hushed Bill.

“I’m fucking in love with you,” Gordon breathed out.

“Oh, Gordon,” Simone said back. They hugged hard and Gordon began kissing her neck, his hands holding her tightly around the waist.

“Let’s go to bed,” Gordon murmured.

Simone giggled, her face flushing.

“See, they’re not fighting, she’s smiling,” Tom whispered.

“I have to check on the boys,” Simone said, a bit breathlessly. Gordon’s mouth attached to her neck again, sucking powerfully. Simone nearly fell to the floor, but Gordon held her up.

“They’ll be fine,” he said, between wet kisses. “Come to bed, Simone.”

“Gordon…”

“Please, Simone.” He caressed her arms and she melted.

“Okay, take me to bed.”

They kissed once more and left the kitchen, hand in hand.

Bill and Tom looked at each other a bit uneasily. “What are they going to do?” Bill asked.

“I think they’re going to bed,” Tom said.

“They didn’t seem tired.” Bill stood. “Maybe we should go to bed.”

Tom nodded. They got up and walked into their room, Bill turning expectantly to Tom.

“Goodnight,” Bill said, smiling sweetly.

Tom shook his head. “I’m fuckin’ in love with you,” he said and Bill put a hand to his mouth. “Bill…”

“Oh, Tomi,” Bill murmured through his fingers. Tom rolled his eyes and grabbed Bill’s hand, leaning forward and kissing Bill chastely on the lips. “That isn’t how they kiss.”

Tom ignored him. “What does ‘in love’ mean?”

Bill tipped his head and frowned. “I don’t know. You said a bad word, though.”

“I know.” Tom stared at Bill. “I’m in love with you?”

“Sounds nicer.” Bill smiled hesitantly. “Are you? What’s it mean?”

Tom shrugged. “Maybe it’s like when Mom says we’re in trouble… It’s really serious.”

“Probably.”

“I’m really serious,” Tom said. “I love you, like, serious.”

“Me too,” Bill said quietly. Something bubbled in his stomach. “I’m… fuckin’… in love with you, Tomi.”

Tom grinned. “Mom says our full names when she’s being serious.”

“Tom Kaulitz.” They giggled. “I’m not going to take you to bed because we’re here.”

“Okay,” Tom said, laughing. He kissed Bill on the lips, lingering just a bit longer than usual. When they pulled apart, their cheeks were flushed.

“Good night,” Bill said.

“Good night, Bill Kaulitz,” Tom replied, smiling. They each crawled into their own beds and pulled the covers up.

Watching quietly from the door was Simone, covering her mouth with her hand.

Lights Out

Fri, 28 Sep 2007 07:49:17 GMT

Title: Lights Out
Author: cynical_terror and undrockroll
Pairing: tomxbill
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: This probably didn't happen.
Summary: Bill and Tom have been playing games their entire lives.

AGE 7

Bill rolled onto his back and gazed up at his brother, chewing his lip. The rug was itchy against his neck, and Tom just wouldn’t pay attention to him. He kicked his foot out, knocking over his stack of Legos.

"Tom, Tom," Bill said, batting at Tom’s leg.

"Mm." Tom moved his foot and curled his legs underneath him on the couch as he stared blankly at the flashing television.

"Hey." Bill sat up and stretched his limbs out, making a soft whining noise. He glared at Tom and pulled himself up onto his knees. "Tomi."

Tom glanced at Bill for a moment, looking pained from the effort. "This is my show, shut up."

“Tom, Bill, wash up for dinner,” their mother called from the kitchen.

“I did,” Bill replied loudly. “And I didn’t even go outside like Tomi did.”

“Shut up,” Tom murmured again. He shoved his hands in his pockets and slumped down on the massive couch.

"You have bugs," Bill said rudely. "In your hair."

Tom grunted. "You are a bug. So quit bugging me!”

Bill stuck his tongue out and sat back on his heels. Tom was staring at the television again. It was almost time for dinner, and then it would be bedtime shortly after. Bill kept his gaze on Tom. He narrowed his eyes and crawled forward a little.

“Meow,” Bill said flatly. He grinned.

Tom scrunched up his nose at the sound but continued watching the television. Bill moved closer.

“Meow,” he said again. This time he crawled right up to Tom and rubbed his cheek against Tom’s foot.

“Don’t touch me,” Tom said. “You’re dumb.”

“Meow?”

“Go away!” Tom extended a leg and gently kicked Bill on the shoulder.

Bill whined and rolled away. “Meow, Tomi. Meow.”

Tom stared straight ahead.

Bill crawled back over to his brother and nuzzled Tom’s knee with his shoulder. Tom flinched, but didn’t pull away. He didn’t look at Bill, either. Bill dared to rest his cheek on Tom’s leg and moved back and forth, making loud purring sounds. “Meow… Meow…”

Tom jerked and moved away.

“Boys!” their mother called from the kitchen.

“Stop meowing,” Tom complained.

“Meow.”

“Stop it!!”

Bill smirked and climbed onto the couch, curling around Tom like a kitten. “Meow, Tomi.” He rubbed his cheek against Tom’s arm, and Tom groaned loudly.

“Okay,” Tom said, moving away from Bill and settling on his knees a couple feet away.

“Meow?”

Tom made a sour face and then pushed Bill back a little. “Bark!”

Bill’s face brightened, Tom was finally playing with him. Whenever Tom got in front of the television, he’d ignore Bill for hours watching his stupid cartoons. Bill had tried many different things to get Tom to pay attention to him; putting sand in his pants, putting bugs in his pants, and telling on him.

But it never worked. Tom could be such a boring couch potato sometimes. Bill could never sit still long enough to watch anything.

Bill meowed again and Tom growled, swiping his hand out at Bill’s arm. Bill ducked and bit Tom’s side.

“Ah!” Tom groaned, twisting away from Bill and getting on the floor. He was on all fours, positioned and ready to attack with a determined smirk on his face. Bill slinked off the couch and delicately crawled over to Tom.

“Meow,” Bill whispered.

“Gurrr.” Tom grabbed Bill’s shoulders and they rolled around, play fighting and batting at each other. Tom licked at Bill’s face and bit his ears, and Bill pulled at Tom’s hair. Soon Bill gave up fighting and let Tom pin him to the ground. Tom held Bill’s arms against the rug and climbed on top of him. “Grrr…”

“Meow,” Bill said helplessly, still grinning. He squirmed underneath Tom and they began rubbing against each other, meowing and growling and purring. Bill licked at Tom’s cheek, like he knew kittens did, and he felt Tom bite down softly on his shoulder, like he knew puppies did.

Tom grinned down at Bill and dragged his body up and down, aligned with Bill’s. Bill let out a squeak, very different from a meow, and pushed up into Tom. It was a natural reaction and Bill’s toes tingled.

Something felt strange about the way they were touching, and Bill was half excited and half afraid. He almost felt like he might throw up or stop breathing, or maybe breathe too much. Tom growled right in his ear and rubbed him especially hard and Bill cried out.

“Tom!”

Both boys jerked apart, cheeks flushed and hair mussed at their mother’s scolding tone.

“You don’t do that,” she said, voice quiet but still firm.

“We were just playing,” Tom said. His lip pouted out and he looked like he was about to cry.

“I was a kitten,” Bill said, as if that explained the whole situation. “Tom was a puppy.”

Simone shook her head and squatted down next to them. “It’s okay to pretend to be puppies or kitties, but you can’t play like that,” she said. She patted both Bill and Tom on the head. “Tom, you shouldn’t ever do that to Bill, okay?”

Tom nodded, calming down a bit as Simone stroked his unruly hair. “But how come?”

“Because you can’t,” she said, looking quite flustered. “You could hurt Bill.”

“It didn’t hurt,” Bill said, eyes wide. “It felt funny.”

Simone smiled softly and helped her two boys up. “Let’s wash up for dinner, unless you want to eat off the floor like real puppies and kittens?”

“Yeah!” Tom replied.

“Eww!” Bill squealed. They both got up, each holding one of Simone’s hands. “Mommy, Tom wasn’t a good puppy.”

Tom glared at Bill behind Simone’s legs. “Grr.”

Bill hissed at Tom and stuck his tongue out.

“Alright, alright, no puppies or kitties at the table, game over,” Simone told them.

Bill grinned at his brother and Tom grinned back. Bill’s seven year old mind knew better than to disobey their mother, but he could not understand what they had done wrong. He didn’t understand why she was so against them playing like that again. She’d told Tom that it would hurt Bill - well, Bill certainly didn’t feel hurt. He felt excited.

He couldn’t wait to play their new game later.

**

Age 10

Tom was lying on his stomach after school, listening to some music in his room. He was flipping through a guitar magazine that his stepfather had given him a few days earlier, and he’d only just gotten around to looking at it. He admired all the guitars in the magazine so much, and hoped to one day be able to own a couple really nice ones.

He heard crashes and commotion downstairs, and knew that Bill was home, probably with their best friend Andreas.

“Ugh,” he said, turning his music up. He usually loved hanging out with Andreas and Bill, but he wasn’t in the mood today. He just wanted to read his magazines and chill out. That was impossible with Andreas and Bill around, they were always so hyper.

Tom’s fears were realized as the door swung open and Andreas popped his head in. “What are you doing?” Andreas called over the music. Bill pushed past Andreas into the room and flopped down on Tom’s bed, knocking a few magazines to the floor.

“I’m listening to music,” Tom said.

“What?” Andreas asked, joining Bill on the bed. They started leafing through Tom’s magazines, smudging them all up. Tom sighed and turned the music down.

“I said, I’m listening to music,” Tom repeated. “Or I was until you jerks came in here and ruined it.”

Bill rolled his eyes. “We brought you something.”

“Yeah,” Andreas said, eyes sparkling. “We found it in the boy’s bathroom.”

Tom perked up a little. “What is it?”

Andreas pulled a rolled up magazine out from his hoodie and set it out on the bed. It was a Playboy magazine. Tom blushed just looking at the cover.

“Oh my god,” he said, grinning at his best friend. “This is awesome.”

“You need to see page twelve,” Bill said, poking his head over Tom’s shoulder.

“Yeah, it’s amazing,” Andreas added.

Tom gulped and opened the magazine. He couldn’t believe it, there were naked girls everywhere. “Oh my god,” he said again.

“I know!” Andreas said, laughing. “Page twelve!”

Tom was just turning the page over when the door downstairs slammed.

“Crud,” Tom said, grabbing the magazine and shoving it under his pillow. “Mom’s home.”

“I should get going,” Andreas said uneasily. “Hey, keep it, but bring it back to school tomorrow. Okay?”

Tom grinned and nodded. “Okay.”

Andreas bounded out of the room and Bill turned to his brother. “I’ll be right back,” he said, following their best friend out of the room. Tom was left alone, and suddenly he wasn’t interested in admiring guitars anymore. The Playboy magazine was burning a hole under his pillow, he was dying to see what was so amazing about page twelve.

Bill didn’t come back upstairs, and Tom scowled at him when he had to go down for dinner. Tom made a promise to himself not to take the magazine out from under his pillow until after their mother had said good night to them. He stayed out of his room for the rest of the evening, watching television with Bill in the family room. He never stopped thinking about the magazine.

“Okay, boys, time to turn in,” Simone announced when it was almost ten at night.

“Mo-om,” Bill whined. “Just another hour.”

“Okay,” Tom replied immediately, getting up and kissing Simone on the cheek. “Good night Mom… Night Bill.”

Bill gave Tom a funny look as he darted up the stairs. Tom quickly brushed his teeth and got ready for bed before retiring to his room for the night. He closed the door and shut the lights off, grabbing a flashlight from his desk. Then, he slowly crawled on his bed and slid his hand under the pillow. He felt the glossy magazine and pulled it out.

"Yes," Tom whispered, settling against the headboard and laying the magazine on his lap. He flicked the flashlight on and shined it over the cover. A busty, scantily clad model came into view and Tom grinned. “Okay, page twelve.” He was just about to open the magazine when his door creaked open.

He shoved the magazine back under his pillow.

“Hey.” It was Bill. Tom breathed a sigh of relief and pulled the magazine back out. “Oh, so that’s what you’re doing!” Bill said. “Lemme look, too!”

Tom scooted over on the bed and allowed Bill to crawl under the covers beside him. They shared a bed more than was probably normal, but neither boy seemed to realize this. If their mother had known, though, she’d have been a little disturbed.

Tom turned to page twelve immediately. He grinned. “Oh wow.”

“Yeah,” Bill said, running a finger along the picture. Displayed on the page was a photograph of a well endowed blonde completely nude with her legs spread enticingly. Both boys had seen topless women a time or two (after all, they got all the semi-risqué movie channels) but they had never seen one completely naked like this. They stared at the picture for a few more minutes and then Tom turned the page, admiring the next model.

“I like her,” he said, pointing to a picture of a brunette wearing a school girl uniform. Bill nodded and stifled a yawn.

“Tom,” he said softly. “I’ve seen these all before.”

“I haven’t.” Tom kept looking, his face growing red and his stomach aching just a bit. It was a strange feeling, one that was all too familiar.

“Tommmm,” Bill whined.

“Just a second,” Tom said. His eyes raked over the images, drinking them in. Jesus, he never knew why guys went all crazy for girls until right then.

“Tom, I want to play,” Bill said.

Tom jerked his head up from the magazine. “Not now, Bill.”

Bill frowned and kneeled a bit. “Meow.”

“No, Bill,” Tom said distractedly. “Not tonight.”

“Tomi…” Bill nuzzled his forehead into Tom’s shoulder and Tom pulled away, still flipping through the pages. He peered closely at one of the pictures.

“God, I didn’t know they… I don’t know… got rid of all the hair,” Tom said, studying a page full of shaved girls. “That’s… awesome.”

“Tomi,” Bill whispered. “Meow.”

“Bill…”

Bill purred loudly, slipping down and rubbing against Tom’s side. Tom rolled his eyes and tried to ignore it.

“Holy… This girl has this amazing underwear on, you can see right through them… Why wear them at all? I wish she wasn’t wearing them,” Tom said, finding it hard to ignore Bill as he was rubbing more insistently.

“Meow?”

Tom looked at Bill. Bill froze, a small smile on his lips.

“We can’t play, it’s too late,” Tom told him. “And Mom will hear or something.”

“Who cares?” Bill said, sticking his lip out. “What’s so wrong about it anyway?”

Tom hadn’t known why his mother got so weird about them playing their games, but now he thought he just might understand. The way he felt when looking at the woman with the see-through panties on was the same way he felt when he was playing with Bill.

Tom blushed a little. “Maybe we’re too old to play.”

Bill’s entire face fell and his shoulders slumped forward. “Fine,” Bill said. He stood up, his pajamas pants dragging under the bottom of his little feet. “If you like that magazine more than playing with me…”

“Hold up,” Tom said, putting the magazine back under the pillow.

“No, I’m going back to bed. See you sometime,” Bill said, on his way out the door.

“Grrr.”

Bill looked over his shoulder. “Meow?”

Tom positioned himself on his hands and knees and leaned forward. “Bark!”

Bill grinned and took a few steps backward. “Meowww…”

Tom grabbed Bill by the shoulders and pinned him easily on the bed. Bill gasped and weakly fought back, but it was rare that he ever won. It was always the puppy, now a medium sized dog, who won. The kitty never won.

Bill licked at Tom’s cheek and Tom growled back, holding Bill down with much force. The magazine had really riled him up, and he felt energy coursing through his limbs. He growled into Bill’s ear and squeezed his sides. Bill mewled and arched his back into Tom, pushing his hip bones against his brother’s. They both groaned and Bill started squirming under Tom, fighting back without really trying.

Tom was really having fun playing with Bill, even more than usual, and he knew that the magazine had something to do with it. He growled in Bill’s face and ground his hips down like he normally did, they both loved the aching feeling in their bellies when they did that. But this time was different, this time Tom felt something strange happen in his pants.

He was…

“Tomi, what is that?” Bill asked, eyes wide. Tom quickly moved off Bill, kneeling back. Tom’s pajama pants were tented out quite a bit in the front. If this had ever happened before, Tom hadn’t exactly noticed, or hadn’t been in a situation where it was obvious.

“It’s hard,” Tom said in awe. Bill leaned forward, reaching his hand out as if to touch it. “Don’t,” Tom said.

Bill nodded and dropped his hand. “Does it hurt?”

“No,” Tom said. “I don’t think anyone’s supposed to touch it.”

“Does it… feel good?”

Tom nodded, reaching his hand down and cupping the bulge softly.

“Then why can’t I touch it?” Hurt flitted across Bill’s face. “Is it like when we play?”

“I don’t know, but you can’t just touch it,” Tom said. “Mom told us not to before, a long time ago, remember?”

“But we still played.” Bill was beginning to sniffle a little, confusion in his eyes. “I want to see it.”

“You can’t.” Tom couldn’t look at Bill. He cringed as he squeezed the hardness once. “Woah.”

“Tomi, what?”

“That… did something, I don’t know.” Tom looked up. Bill was staring so intently, leaning forward.

“Is it my fault?” Bill asked in a very small voice.

Tom thought it over. It could have been Bill’s fault, but they had played the game so many times and nothing different had ever happened. The only thing different that night was the magazines.

“I don’t know,” Tom said again. “I think maybe you should go back to your room, maybe.”

“Let me see it,” Bill said firmly. “Sometimes my thing hurts too.”

“It doesn’t hurt! God damn it, Bill,” Tom said, making a face.

Bill huffed. “Are we not going to play anymore? Ever? Because your… thing is hard?”

“It’d probably poke you,” Tom said quietly. He had gone from horror, to awe, to having a strange sense of pride over it. “It feels really big.” Now he actually wanted to show Bill. Someone had to see how big he was! “I’ll show you but you can’t tell Mom.”

Bill nodded quickly. “Okay, okay.”

Tom smiled a little and pushed his pajamas down.

“Whoa,” Bill said. “And it doesn’t hurt?”

“No,” Tom said. He touched it a little. “It feels nice.”

“Wow, this is cooler than the magazines.” Bill reached a hand out but then dropped it quickly. “Sorry.”

“You can touch it once,” Tom said. Bill grinned and put his hand out, stroking it softly as if it were a kitten or puppy. Tom let out a low growl and Bill touched it again.

“I think it moved,” Bill said, eyes wide. “Oh my god!” Bill took his hand away. “What are you going to do with it?”

Tom shrugged.

“What if it doesn’t go away?”

“It will,” Tom said slowly. “Maybe.”

“It’ll show, like, in school tomorrow,” Bill said.

“Yeah.” Tom glanced down, admiring it. “It’s so big.”

“Huge.” Bill slowly moved his hand close to Tom’s groin again. “Can I touch one more time?”

“Why?” Tom sighed. “Fine.”

Bill ran his fingers along the length and then wrapped them around it, squeezing once. Tom cried out and his hips bucked off the mattress. “Oh god!” Bill hissed. He pulled his hand away and grinned hesitantly.

“Yeah, that was good,” Tom said, eyes wide.

“Tomi…”

“What.”

“I think maybe… I have one, too. Um. You know, like yours. Oh god, it feels weird.”

“Show me.”

“No way.” Bill was making a face and twisting the hem of his shirt around with his fingers. “I feel funny, everything is tight. And tingly.”

Tom nodded. “Show.”

“But…”

“I showed you mine,” Tom said. “You have to show me yours.”

Bill bit his lip and made a soft “hmph” noise before pushing his pants down. His wasn’t as hard as Tom’s, but it definitely had potential.

“Wow,” Tom said. “How? Mine was from the magazine, I think.”

“I don’t know,” Bill said, staring down at himself. He poked it and it twitched. Bill yelped. “Tomi, this is so cool. I didn’t know it could do this.”

Tom was grinning, ear to ear. He felt like a man. “What are you going to do about yours?”

Bill shrugged. “Nothing, I guess. I wonder if Andreas knows about this.”

“Don’t talk about Andreas when I’ve got my pants down,” Tom groaned.

Bill snickered. “No wonder he wants you to bring the magazine back tomorrow.”

“Shut up,” Tom said, shoving Bill with his shoulder. Bill squealed and almost fell off the bed.

Wincing, Bill pulled his pajama pants back up. “I might go back to my room.”

“Why?” Tom was surprised at his own voice, it sounded not like him.

“Because… I’m tired,” Bill replied.

“What about that?” Tom pointed to Bill’s pants.

“Oh… I don’t know. I’m sure it will go away when I sleep.”

Tom laughed. “Yeah, okay. Good night.”

“See you.”

Bill left the room and closed the door behind him gently. Tom lay back on the mattress and realized that his pants were still down. “Wow,” he murmured, staring at his erection. He touched it again, and while it felt good, it also felt strange.

He didn’t know what to do about it. He thought about the magazine under his pillow, and his groin ached. However, when he thought about holding Bill down and growling in his ear, and Bill licking his face and meowing, he felt like it got harder, bigger.

Tom was confused. He rolled over and tried to calm himself down.

**

AGE 13

“Let me see,” Tom said, holding his hand out. Bill shook his head and crumpled the piece of paper up.

“It’s dumb, it’s nothing,” Bill replied. They were in the living room, Tom’s guitar in his lap, and a notebook in Bill’s.

“I want to read it, we need new songs,” Tom said. Bill shook his head again. “Come on.”

Bill refused. Things had changed between the boys over the past few years, they weren’t nearly as close as they once had been, and Bill was embarrassed for Tom to read his new lyrics.

Tom didn’t know Bill was embarrassed, he just thought Bill was mad at him again. They’d been fighting a lot lately, ever since their band had formed. Things were tense and tempers flared, they both wanted the control.

“Just give me it,” Tom demanded.

“I crumpled it up.” Bill held up the paper and spit on it. “And now my drool is on it.”

“I don’t care, your drool is on everything,” Tom said, starting to get angry. “Hand it over or I’m writing songs from now on.”

Bill shoved the paper under his bottom and gave Tom a smug smile. Tom narrowed his eyes.

“Grrr.”

Bill’s eyes widened. For a moment they just stared at each other, unmoving.

They hadn’t played this game in a long time. Not since…

Bill flushed and said, “What?”

Tom set his guitar down and got on his knees. It should have been silly, Bill should have laughed, but when Tom growled again he couldn’t help but shiver.

“Let me see it,” Tom said, stalking forward.

“Tom…”

“I’m going to get you, and I always win,” Tom said.

Bill let out a short breath. “No you don’t.”

Tom flung forward, grabbing Bill’s arms and trying to tip him backward. Bill’s side jammed into the arm of the couch and he gasped. “Tom, stop it, god!” He fought back, pushing Tom off him and onto the floor. “That’s so dumb!”

But Tom wasn’t giving up, play fighting with Bill made him feel like they were close again. As close as they used to be, when they used to share everything. He grabbed Bill’s ankle and pulled his surprised brother onto the floor with him.

In Bill’s shocked state, it was easy for Tom to get the upper hand. He climbed on top of Bill and held his hands down. He ducked his face in, very close to Bill’s. “Bark,” he said.

Bill scoffed. “No.”

“Say it,” Tom said, smiling. “Or I’ll pull your hair.”

“You won’t,” Bill said. “I’ll scream.”

“Play,” Tom said firmly. “Come on, you invented it.”

“Did I?” Bill tried slithering out of Tom’s hold, but his brother had gotten stronger in his upper arms since playing the guitar, and it was no longer easy for Bill to overpower him if he wanted to. “Tom, let me out.”

Tom leaned down more, the tips of his dreads brushing Bill’s cheeks. Bill shook his head quickly, making a face and struggling with his arms. It wasn’t so much that he didn’t want to play; he just wanted to be on equal grounds with Tom, wanted to be able to pin him, maybe.

But something in Tom’s eyes told Bill that no, this was how it was supposed to be, and Bill relaxed his arms and gazed upward.

“… meow.”

Tom grinned. “Grrrr…. Arroof.”

“Meow?” Bill turned his head to the side, exposing his long neck, and Tom licked down it as a dog would. Bill trembled for a moment but then realized that he had some tricks of his own. He grabbed Tom’s forearms and dug his nails into the skin there. Tom yelped and they rolled once, laughing and barking and meowing.

It felt silly, and it was.

“Bill,” Tom said, his voice gravelly and low. “See, I got you.”

“But you don’t have my song,” Bill said slyly. “I shoved it under the couch cushions.”

Tom went to move off Bill, but Bill wrapped his arms and legs around Tom as tightly as he could.

“Gotcha,” Bill said. He arched up a bit and nipped at Tom’s chin. “We haven’t played this game in a long time.”

Tom growled, struggling a bit in Bill’s hold. “Dumb kitty,” was all he said.

Bill laughed. “Stupid dog.” He clawed Tom’s back hard.

“Fuck, now I see why we stopped playing this game,” Tom said. He shoved Bill down and bit his shoulder. Bill squeaked and then mewled as Tom slobbered up his neck. “The dog always beats the cat.”

“Not anymore,” Bill said. He arched up hard, catching Tom off guard and squirmed out from under him. He hissed, feeling stupid and excited even as he did it. He crawled away from Tom as quickly as he could, but Tom grabbed his legs and pulled him back.

“You’re not playing right,” Tom said. He flipped Bill over and loomed over him. Bill’s eyes went wide as Tom crushed his body down onto his. It was only then that they both realized just how excited they were.

“Tom,” Bill breathed. “It’s touching me.”

Tom panted, he was hard against Bill’s stomach. “So?”

“It’s not supposed to.”

“It’s just a game,” Tom said, starting to move his body back and forth on Bill. “We’re just… playing.”

“Oh,” Bill replied, and he let a ragged moan escape from his lips. It startled them both, and Tom tried to hide his surprise by burying his face in Bill’s neck and giving a long lick along Bill’s skin. Bill drew in a sharp breath and locked his legs around Tom again, pulling him down harder, forcing their bodies to grind together. “Tomi, I can feel it.”

“What?”

“Your… thing, I can feel it again,” Bill whispered. He squeezed Tom’s face out from his neck with a shoulder and licked along Tom’s jaw. “Meow, meow.”

Tom growled. He was getting harder by the moment, and felt something pop up from Bill, too. He tried to make their arousals collide, tried to see what would happen if they rubbed together.

“Ohhh,” they both moaned together. That hit the spot. Tom nipped at Bill’s chin and Bill purred low in his throat, eyes closed and neck arched back. Tom began to suck on Bill’s neck softly, latching his lips onto the hot skin and inhaling. He swirled his tongue around, and Bill mewled helplessly.

Bill pushed Tom’s shoulders up and held him still, looking him right in the eye. Tom paused in his grinding and stared, eyes narrowing. Bill leaned forward and started licking at Tom’s face.

“Meow, Tomi,” Bill breathed, licking next to Tom’s nose. “Oh, shit.”

“Yeah,” Tom replied, dragging his hips down hard on Bill and wincing. “Grr…”

They moved together, finding a strange, harsh rhythm with their hips. Tom’s hands slid down Bill’s side, pushing under to cup his ass. He lifted Bill into his downward thrusts and they both hissed.

Bill had never felt anything like it, it was even better than jerking off, and he already thought that was the best thing ever. He knew they shouldn’t be doing it, too, especially not here, and that only made it better. They’d be in so much trouble if their mom found out.

“Oh, good puppy,” Bill said breathlessly. Tom laughed and dragged his body down against Bill’s again.

“Lazy kitty, just lying there,” Tom groaned out. Bill made a face and tilted his head up, licking right across Tom’s lips. “Fuck!”

“Meow,” Bill said back, pulling his face away, testing Tom. Tom followed, licking sloppily over Bill’s chin and lower lip. “Uhhh, Tomi.”

“Arroof,” Tom barked lowly, in a tone not quite meant to arouse Bill, but it did, anyway. Bill gasped and spread his thighs, lifting his hips up into Tom even more, feeling their erections sliding together. It was almost painful, but it was so good, and they couldn’t stop.

Tom panted in Bill’s face, and then he did what neither of them would do. He licked Bill’s lips and lingered on them, putting a hand behind Bill’s head and kissing him with purpose.

At first Bill struggled, but when he realized that it wasn’t an accident, it wasn’t a mistake, he settled into the kiss and shut his eyes, licking along Tom’s lips and purring insatiably.

When they pulled apart Bill yelped. Tom dug his erection down against him. They weren’t pretending what was happening wasn’t happening anymore. It was a race to get off, and they both desperately rubbed and grinded, radiating heat back and forth, licking each other’s lips.

“Oh, oh god,” Bill sighed out. No one had ever touched him like this before, no one had ever even kissed him like this before. “Now I see why Mom didn’t want us to do this,” he said, laughing a little as he jerked up into Tom.

Tom laughed, too, moving harder and faster. “Yeah, you’re, mmm, right.” He kissed Bill and licked at his lips, sloppy and fast. Tom could feel his orgasm coming, tightening his balls and straining his cock, making it even harder. He realized completely now how he’d felt about his brother before when they were younger. He’d wanted to rub against Bill, to kiss him like he wanted to do with the girls in the Playboy magazine.

The idea should have shocked him, maybe even disgusted him, but instead he felt relief. He lifted Bill into one last hard grind and came in his pants, shouting as he did. Good thing they were alone. Bill writhed underneath him and Tom slid his hand to Bill’s groin and pressed down, twisting his wrist.

“Ah!” Bill cried, and came hard, shaking as Tom continued petting him through his pants. “Tom…”

“That was good, wasn’t it?” Tom asked. Bill nodded, trembling against the floor. Tom nuzzled his face into Bill’s neck. He was relieved because now he knew why his brother made him hard, now he knew why he missed Bill so badly at night. He really liked Bill, and maybe now they could play again.

*

Tom’s door creaked open late that night and he rolled, looking over his shoulder with one eye open. He felt groggy and disoriented.

“Tomi?”

Tom blinked a couple of times. It was Bill, of course it was Bill. Tom immediately held a corner of the blankets up, a force of habit from when they were younger. Bill crawled in and Tom waited for him to press their bodies together, but Bill didn’t.

“Hey,” Tom whispered.

“Hi,” Bill replied softly, keeping his distance. “I couldn’t sleep.”

“Why?”

“I kept thinking of your thing. And my thing. And what happened with our things.”

“God damn it Bill,” Tom groaned. “What… about it?”

“I don’t know, just… that was weird,” Bill said. “I’m confused.”

“Do you want to play?” Tom started to move closer to Bill.

“No,” Bill said, putting a hand up to divide them. “I don’t think so… Maybe I do. It’s just…”

“Why not?” Tom touched Bill’s shoulder and Bill flinched, but didn’t pull away.

“Years ago, Mom told us not to do that. You know. I sort of understood why today.”

Tom nodded slightly. “So what?”

“I know you get it, Tomi, you probably understood way before I did,” Bill said.

“I didn’t, not really,” Tom said. “I just… want to do it again.”

Bill frowned. “But we can’t, because Mom said—”

“Mom also said lights out is at ten, and we never go to bed then,” Tom said. He moved closer to Bill, his hand touching Bill’s belly. “I want to see it again, this time I want to touch it.”

Bill couldn’t help but let out a tiny squeak. “You want to… see my thing?”

“Stop calling it a thing,” Tom said, smiling.

Bill swallowed. “You want to see my penis?”

That was somehow worse, but Tom nodded. “Can I? Is it hard?”

“Yes,” Bill said very quietly. “It’s bigger now, than you know, before. When you saw it last. Are you sure we won’t get in trouble?”

“It’s lights out,” Tom said. “Mom can’t come up.”

“Lights out,” Bill said slowly. ‘Lights out’ was a new rule in the house. It was the product of a rather embarrassing conversation their mother had had with the twins about ‘I know you’re both growing boys’ and ‘I will respect your privacy’ and ‘maybe another responsibility for you two could be to wash your own bedding from now on’. They had all agreed that yes, the twins would do their own laundry and okay, Lights Out would be at ten and that meant their mom couldn’t come upstairs for anything because God knows she didn’t want to walk in on them “growing up”.

“I don’t know, it feels wrong,” Bill added, but a smile was forming on his lips.

“I really liked kissing you,” Tom said honestly. “And I think you liked it, too.”

“I liked your penis rubbing against me.”

“God damn it, Bill,” Tom said loudly, wincing as he felt his belly stir.

“Well, I did.”

Tom sighed. “So… whatever. When it’s lights out, we can do what we want.”

"Are you sure?" Bill was looking at his brother as if he held all the answers. Tom just nodded firmly. Bill turned to his side and brought his face very close to Tom’s. “Meow.”

Tom grinned. “Grrr…”

*

16

Tom took his time eating his cereal that morning, sitting across from Bill in their kitchen at home. They were there for a short break between touring and recording, taking some time to relax and unwind before another heavy schedule.

“Boys,” Simone said, coming into the kitchen and messing with her earrings. “I hate to do this to you, since I hardly see you anymore and you don’t even call or write…”

“Mo-om,” Bill groaned.

Simone smiled. “But I’ve got to go into the city all day to help Gordon with a few things,” she said. “The house is yours. I know you’re heartbroken.”

“Can I throw a party?” Tom said, his mouth full.

“Of course.” Simone rolled her eyes and tapped Tom lightly on the back of his head. “Bill, you’re in charge.”

“Yeah, I’m in charge,” Bill told Tom, kicking him hard under the table. Tom trapped Bill’s foot between his leg and held onto it.

“I’ll see you kids later tonight, possibly tomorrow. We might get a hotel,” Simone said. “I’ll have my phone, not like you ever call…”

“Mo-om.” This time it was both of them.

Simone kissed Tom on top of the head and then kissed Bill on the cheek. "Be good." She gave them one last look and left them alone in the kitchen. Bill glared playfully at Tom from across the table and tugged his foot away from Tom’s legs.

“I’m in charge,” Bill said smugly.

Tom rolled his eyes and shoved an alarmingly large amount of cereal into his mouth. “Whatever,” he said.

Bill made a disgusted face. “Tomi, close your mouth, that’s gross.”

“That’s not what you said last night when I was licking your—”

Bill kicked Tom hard under the table again. “Mom said so, so I’m in charge.”

“If we listen to what Mom wants, then I guess you’ll be sleeping alone tonight,” Tom said slyly. Bill pouted.

“Yeah right, we’ve been cooped up in the tour bus and hotels for a month, you won’t be able to keep your hands off me,” Bill said. Tom shrugged. “You couldn’t last night. Bad puppy. Mom was just downstairs.”

Tom groaned a little at Bill’s words. “It was lights out.”

“You rubbed your penis all over me this morning, Tomi,” Bill said. Tom swore. “That wasn’t lights out.”

“God damn it, Bill.”

Bill grinned. “You did.”

“I know what I did,” Tom mumbled, feeling himself flush. “God, why do you have to say it like that?”

“Meow,” was all Bill said, staring hotly at Tom.

“Hmph.” Tom got up and put his cereal bowl in the sink. Bill followed him, clinging to the back of his shirt.

“Tomi,” Bill said, stepping on the backs of Tom’s heels as Tom walked into the living room. “Tomiiiii.”

“You don’t sound like someone in charge,” Tom replied.

Bill let go of Tom and sat down on the couch. “Well, I’m bored.”

Tom raised his eyebrows at Bill. “We’ve got the house to ourselves.”

“True.” Bill flopped onto his back and drummed on his belly with his fingers. “True, true.”

Tom looked around. They very rarely messed around anywhere but Tom’s room when they were home. He joined Bill on the couch and touched Bill’s thigh. Bill made a soft noise and turned to Tom.

“Not here,” Bill whispered.

“Then where?” Tom whispered back.

Bill’s eyes widened. “I’ve got an idea.”

“Uh oh.”

“How about…” Bill hummed a little, looking at the ceiling and wiggling in his seat. “Mom and Gordon’s… bed.”

Tom made a face. “Ugh.”

“Meow,” Bill replied, crawling off the couch and getting down on all fours on the floor. He started slinking out of the room, in the direction of their parents’ room. “Come on, she’s got the good cable in her room. If anything we’ll just hang out and watch dirty movies.”

Tom laughed. "Yeah, okay." He followed Bill into the bedroom and felt a little homesick, even though they were already home. As children, they used to camp out in their mother’s room on days off and spend the entire day in her bed watching cartoons or playing Go Fish, or whatever it was that little kids did.

Bill hopped onto the bed and flopped to his back. “We watched our first porn in here, because she had the DVD player.”

“Oh yeah,” Tom said, smiling and sitting on the bed as well. “That’s right.”

“Very naughty,” Bill said. He rolled close to Tom and nuzzled his thigh. “Pet me.”

Tom swallowed, watching Bill curl up against him. “In here? Really?”

Bill nodded. “I need a nice stroke, Tomi.”

Bill’s words went straight to Tom’s cock and he growled. It was so easy to fall into their little game. He hunched over Bill and forced him to his back.

“I said pet me, not molest me,” Bill breathed.

Tom leaned down and lapped at Bill’s face. “Same thing.”

“Are you gonna take your penis out and rub it all over me again?” Bill asked, wide eyed. Tom choked. “Want me to get it wet in my mouth? Is it already wet?”

“God damn it, Bill,” Tom said lowly, hovering over Bill. He dipped his hips down and dragged them across Bill’s groin.

“It feels hard,” Bill said.

“That’s because,” Tom replied, jerking against Bill a couple of times, “it is.”

“For me?”

“Because of you,” Tom said. He pinned Bill to the mattress and growled low in his ear. Bill purred, squirming beneath him, grabbing at Tom’s back and pulling on his dreads.

Tom slid his hands down Bill’s slender frame and hooked his fingers into the waist of Bill’s pants. He tugged at them a few times, and when Bill flicked his belt open, Tom managed to pull them down and off, along with his boxers. Bill laughed and yanked his shirt over his head, throwing it onto the floor. Soon he was naked and splayed out, and it made Tom shake.

“I want to see you now,” Bill said, tugging at the hem of Tom’s shirt. “I never get to see you.”

Tom wrinkled his nose. “That’s because it’s always night time or something when we-”

“Meow,” Bill said, raising an eyebrow.

Tom gestured to his pants, smirking. Bill scrambled up, pulling them off easily, and then Tom’s shirt was history. For a moment they just stared at each other, their cocks hardening before their eyes.

“Fuck, come here,” Tom said, his voice gravelly and low. Bill crawled into Tom’s lap and locked his legs around his brother’s waist, rubbing their erections together. “Grrr.”

"Sshh." Bill lapped at Tom’s neck and rocked his hips back and forth, driving Tom crazy.

“Don’t tell me to shh,” Tom said, nearly growling. He put his fingers on Bill’s lips. “Suck.”

Bill raised an eyebrow. “Why?”

“Because I want to put them in you,” Tom said. “Just how you like.”’

Bill sucked the fingers in immediately and jerked in Tom’s lap, his cock leaving a wet trail across Tom’s stomach. “Mmm,” he moaned. “Do it.”

Tom gritted his teeth and pulled his fingers from Bill’s mouth, watching the saliva trail from Bill’s lips to his hand. “Does the kitty want a nice long stroke?”

Bill mewled and sat up on his knees, his ass just a few inches off Tom’s lap. “Yes, please.”

“Alright.” Tom licked Bill’s neck, just like an excited puppy, and pressed a wet finger into Bill’s body. Bill immediately thrust down, used to the penetration. They’d only started messing around with fingers a few months ago, but already it was one of Bill’s favorite things.

“More,” Bill moaned. Tom complied and put another finger in, curling it and watching Bill arch back and cry out. “More. Pet me, please.”

“God,” Tom murmured, adding two more fingers. “I remember when one finger was more than enough.”

“I need more, go deeper,” Bill whined. “Touch my meow button.”

Tom laughed, pulling his fingers out. “Your meow button??”

Bill sighed, wriggling in Tom’s lap. “You know where it is. Find it.”

“You’re in charge,” Tom replied, putting four fingers in Bill. Bill gasped and gritted his teeth together, almost seeing stars. “Can’t handle it?”

“Mmm.” Bill moved up and down, groaning as Tom’s fingers brushed against his prostate. It didn’t quite satisfy, though. “Tom…”

“What.”

“I think you should… Oh,” Bill moaned softly. Tom was twisting his fingers, screwing Bill steadily. “I think you should maybe…”

Tom kissed Bill’s neck. “Maybe what.”

“I want you to touch the button with your penis.”

Tom gaped at Bill. “What?” His hand stopped moving and Bill whined.

“Put your penis inside me,” Bill said. “I want you to have sex with me.”

“No way,” Tom shot back. “No way. I couldn’t… put it there.”

“Why? Imagine how it’d feel,” Bill murmured, squeezing Tom’s fingers inside his body as hard as he could. Tom hissed through his teeth at the feeling and his cock throbbed. “So much better than just rubbing.”

“I like what we do,” Tom said, fluttering his fingers inside Bill. Bill squeaked and tipped his head back. Tom licked up Bill’s neck.

“You put it in girls,” Bill said, shifting his weight in Tom’s lap, trying to take his fingers deeper.

“I don’t… I don’t…” Tom flushed. “I don’t put it there.”

“You’d have to put it there, to have sex with me,” Bill said. “Don’t you want to?”

“I don’t know,” Tom said honestly. “I’ve never thought about it.”

“Well, think about it,” Bill said, right against Tom’s ear. “Think about it.”

Bill continued squeezing Tom’s fingers, steadily contracting his muscles. Tom was grinding his teeth, deep in thought.

“God damn it, Bill,” Tom finally said, a small grin forming.

“You thought about it.”

Tom nodded. “Let’s try it.”

Bill squeaked. “Um, meow.”

“Grrr.” Tom spread his fingers apart in Bill, testing the resistance. Bill moaned, tipping his head back again, but he didn’t seem to be in pain. Tom pushed his fingers in further, deeper than he knew he’d ever been before. Bill clenched around them, only seeming to want more. “More?”

“You,” Bill whispered. “Just you.”

“Ahh…” Tom pulled his fingers out with a wet pop. “I’m going to have sex with you.”

“We’re going to fuck.”

“My dick,” Tom said resolutely, “in you.”

Bill fell backward, spreading out on the bed. “Oh, Tomi.”

Tom felt an explosion on his belly as he looked at Bill. He leaned down and kissed Bill’s hip, tonguing the freckle that only Tom knew about. Bill drew in a sharp breath and pushed a hand through Tom’s heavy hair, and pulled him forward. Their lips connected and they stared at each other, sustaining the moment.

“You’ve got to get our lube, if you’re gonna put that thing in me,” Bill finally said. He rubbed his thigh against Tom’s cock and Tom nodded frantically. He knew exactly where the lube was; hidden under his pillow. They’d used it last night when Tom had stroked Bill deep inside over and over again until Bill came, gasping and shaking. “Hurry,” Bill said.

Tom leapt off the bed, trudging up the stairs to his bedroom, the whole time thinking, “Gonna fuck, gonna fuck, gonna fuck” in his head. He hadn’t had actual sex in a good long while and his cock felt ready to burst at the thought of doing Bill. Messing around with Bill was already better than any sex he’d ever had with a girl. He couldn’t imagine how it would feel to put his cock in him.

He was going to find out soon. He grabbed the lube and darted down the stairs and back into the bedroom. Bill was still on his back, one hand around his cock, and the other pressing two fingers in his ass.

“Jesus,” Tom said. “Couldn’t wait for me?”

“No,” Bill said simply.

Tom grinned. “Fuck, that looks good.”

“So does that,” Bill replied, grabbing Tom’s cock as Tom slid onto the bed. Tom moaned and got on top of Bill. He grinded against him for a moment and Bill cried out, pulling his fingers out of his ass and gripping Tom’s shoulders. “Try it now.”

“You seem to have it all under control,” Tom said, sucking Bill’s finger into his mouth.

“I’m in charge,” Bill said, hooking his fingers in Tom’s cheek and tugging his face closer. “And I say put your penis in my ass.”

“God damn it, Bill,“ Tom said through gritted teeth. He got on his knees and popped the cap off the bottle of lube. He squeezed some into his palms and sloppily rubbed the cool gel up and down his cock, his eyes never leaving Bill’s face. “Spread your legs.”

Bill obediently did, and Tom groaned as everything came into view.

“Bill,” Tom said. “You’re really…” He bit his lip. “You look nice.”

“Oh, god damn it, Tom,” Bill said, rolling his eyes, but he was smiling. “Meow.”

“Grrr…”

“Do it.”

“Gonna.” Tom nudged his cock against Bill’s ass, feeling the heat of it and shuddering. “Are you sure?”

“I’ve thought about it for awhile, yes,” Bill said, his face beginning to flush.

Tom smiled and pushed just the head of his cock inside Bill. Bill cried out, fisting the sheets. “Fuck, Bill. You thought about it?”

Bill nodded, biting his lip. “Tomi, that hurts,” he said. “Hurry, get to the good part.”

Tom didn’t know if he could hurry without losing his mind and coming all inside Bill. He eased in slowly, feeling the incredible heat and tightness of his brother. “God damnit, God damnit,” he chanted.

Bill rolled his hips a bit, crying out in pain as Tom sunk in deeper. “Hurry, I need it,” Bill whispered. A drop of sweat dripped down his forehead. Tom pressed in as deeply as he could and did the only thing he could think of to do, to pull back and thrust in again.

Bill rose off the mattress, moaning in pleasure as Tom’s cock struck his prostate dead on. “Oh! Right there! Yes, Tomi, yes.”

“I’m hurting you,” Tom managed.

“No, no, no, no,” Bill said, each time Tom thrust inside him. “Oh, god, no.”

“Yes,” Tom hissed.

“Mmmm, meow.” Bill clenched his eyes shut and clawed at Tom’s back.

“Your damn, fucking nails,” Tom groaned. They were digging into the skin on his back, quite painfully and with surprising force.

Bill’s toes tightened and curled, and his legs went rigid. Tom’s cock was in him further than fingers ever could go, and it was rubbing him just the right way. Bill wrapped his hands around his cock and squeezed hard, harder than he ever had, and he screamed loudly in Tom’s ear.

“Fuck, Bill,” Tom growled, lifting his head and jaggedly dragging his cock in and out of Bill. Bill looked at Tom and shrugged helplessly, losing all control of his muscles. His head dropped down to the mattress and hit the headboard a few times, and he just smiled dazedly.

Tom was screwing the life out of him and he was giving Bill something he knew he needed.

“Tom, Tom, Tom,” Bill whimpered. “That feels so full.”

“Uhh.” Tom grunted low in his throat and rocked into Bill, making his whole body vibrate in curious pleasure.

“You’re squeezing the fuck out of me.”

“Fuck the fuck out of me,” Bill babbled. He was lost in what Tom was doing to him, in what he was doing to himself. “Ugh, I’m not going to be able to sit for a week.”

Tom just thrust harder, unable to stop himself from plunging in and out of that scorching heat. “I’ve got you good,” Tom muttered, thrusting his hips forward. “Stupid kitty.”

Bill cried out, working his cock and arching up so high Tom almost slipped out of him. “Idiot puppy,” Bill said, taking a deep breath and then coming with a gasp and a wail. His come hit Tom in the stomach, dripping down to Tom’s groin. “Oh god, stop,” Bill moaned.

Tom shook his head. “Fuck no.”

“It hurts,” Bill whined.

“Please, Bill, please,” Tom grunted out. “A little more. Almost there.”

“Hurry, ugh!”

“Can’t hurry this,” Tom gritted out. “Oh, fuck, just work with me. Squeeze.”

“Eh,” Bill said uselessly.

“Grrrrr.” Tom growled loudly this time, and Bill’s eyes widened. He winced as he tried to squeeze Tom’s cock, but it was difficult.

“Tomi, can’t,” Bill whimpered. “Don’t make me.”

“Come on!!” Tom leaned down and sucked on Bill’s neck, and Bill squirmed impossibly underneath him. “Bill, do it for me.”

“I’ll suck you,” Bill replied.

Tom shook his head, although that did sound good. “Just… I’m close, come on. Fucking kitty.”

“Woof,” Bill said stubbornly, but he tried to tighten his muscles around Tom. Tom groaned and pulled back, finding it hard to thrust back in. He put two hands on Bill’s ass and spread it, thumbing either side of Bill’s hole, allowing himself inside. Bill just moaned and put his hands over his eyes, his mouth open in a silent cry.

Tom felt Bill close in around him and he came instantly, hard inside Bill. Bill gasped and twisted his hips, and his knees bent. “Tomi!”

“Ungh.” Tom doubled over and almost crushed Bill. Bill supported Tom, holding him up, just barely. “Sorry.”

“You did it in me,” Bill said. “It’s all in there… Oh, I can feel it, maybe…”

“Bill,” Tom groaned.

Tom pulled out and they both hissed.

“You didn’t stop,” Bill said, spreading his legs a little and whining.

“I… I’m sorry,” Tom said. He felt a bit like an ass about it, but he’d just had one of the most intense orgasms of his life, so he couldn’t really dwell on it. “You felt so good.”

Bill laughed. “Mmm, I liked it.”

Tom just shook his head and rolled off Bill, watching his cock soften. “You like being bossed around, huh?”

Bill didn’t answer, he was busy pushing careful fingers into his body, eyes widening in amazement as they came out tipped in come. “Look,” he demanded.

Tom felt his cock twitch at the sight. “Stop being so damn dirty, Bill.”

Bill made a hurt face and then very slowly raised his fingers to his mouth. “Meow,” he said, and then lapped at his fingers.

Tom covered his eyes with his hands. “God damn it, Bill!”

*

Age 19

“Remember Lights Outs?”

Tom looked up from his guitar. He was sitting on a hotel bed and Bill was lying next to him, staring blankly at the television.

“Fucking best rule in the house,” Tom replied, staring down at his guitar strings again.

“I remember what happened after Lights Out,” Bill said.

"Mhmm." Tom strummed a few chords and Bill closed his eyes, humming along. “I remember what happened before lights out.”

Bill winked and laid his head on Tom’s thigh. “Wanna turns the lights out, Tomi?”

Tom raised an eyebrow. “Ruff.”

Bill laughed and rolled over, flipping the lamp off, the room snapping into darkness. There was the sound of a guitar twanging, lips meeting, and very softly, the tiniest of meows.